The Lotus Eaters

Letters to the Editor, University of Starvation Cove Law Review, Fall, AC 488

Dear Sir:

A translation of your article of your last edition, entitled Criminal Justice in the Timocratic Republic of Balboa: Barbarism at the Bar, has been published within the Republic of Balboa. While it had most of its facts right, there were some glaring omissions I thought I might acquaint you with. For example, in discussing the method and mechanism of the admittedly frightful death of Neron Leonardo de Lingero, the author, Ms Meister, failed, curiously, to discuss Mr. de Lingero's crime.

You see, Mr. de Lingero was convicted of a series of crimes involving Ana-Barbara Encito-Espera, aged eight years. Mr. de Lingero had kidnapped Ana-Barbara from in front of her home. He had then subjected her to a lengthy period of rape, forcible sodomy, and torture, before killing her, and finally cooking and eating her. And, while it is true that there were neither eyewitnesses nor a body, the jury in the case thought the evidence sufficient, said evidence being in the form of video recordings Mr. de Lingero had made of young Ana-Barbara's ordeal, presumably so he could enjoy her suffering after she was gone.

Oh, and it was closer to two hundred thousand people who came to see justice done.

Very Truly Yours,

Lourdes Nuñez de Carrera

Second Vice President

Ciudad Balboa, Republic of Balboa

PS: We don't use prisoners for biological warfare experimentation. We don't have an offensive biological warfare program. We do permit a certain number of non-violent prisoners to volunteer to test vaccines developed by your country which your government refuses to permit human testing on. These prisoners are given substantial time off of their sentences. Again, all are volunteers.