Halo

16 Family Ties

Gabriel’s pronouncement that Xavier was to have the honor of being our first dinner guest made me suspicious. I couldn’t help but question the motive behind the invitation. So far the only feelings Gabriel had expressed toward Xavier had wavered between disdain and indifference.

“Why are you inviting him over?” I asked.

“Why shouldn’t he come?” Gabriel replied. “He knows about us now, so I don’t see the harm in it. Besides, there are some ground rules we need to cover.”

“Such as?”

“Such as the importance of confidentiality for a start.”

“You don’t know Xavier, he’s as likely to blab as I am,” I said and realized the irony as soon as the words were out.

“Well, that really doesn’t inspire confidence, does it?” Gabriel remarked.

“Don’t worry, Bethany, we just want to get to know him,” said Ivy, giving my arm a maternal pat. She looked pointedly at Gabe. “We want him to feel comfortable. If we’re going to trust him, he has to be able to trust us.”

“What if he’s busy tonight?” I parried.

“We won’t know if you don’t ask him,” Gabriel replied.

“I don’t even have his number anymore.”

Gabriel went to a closet in the hall and returned with a hefty phone directory, which he dropped unceremoniously onto the table.

“I’m sure it’s listed,” he said darkly.

It was evident that Gabriel wasn’t going to be talked out of this idea, so I didn’t argue further and trudged off to call Xavier. The only protest I made was making sure to stomp up the stairs as loudly as possible. I’d never called Xavier’s house and an unfamiliar voice answered.

“Hello, Claire speaking.”

The voice was confident and impeccably polite. I had been secretly hoping that no one would pick up. If there was one thing that I felt might drive Xavier away, it was a night with my bizarre family. I considered hanging up the phone and telling Gabriel I couldn’t get through, but I knew there was little point — he’d know I was lying and make me call back. Or worse, he might insist on making the call himself.

“Hello, it’s Bethany Church calling,” I said in a voice so meek I barely recognized it as my own. “May I please speak to Xavier?”

“Sure,” the girl replied. “I’ll just get him for you.” I heard the clang of the receiver being put down, then her voice calling through the house. “Xavier! Phone!” I picked up a rustling noise and then the sound of children squabbling. Finally I heard footsteps, and Xavier’s dreamy voice echoed through the receiver.

“Hello, Xavier speaking.”

“Hi, it’s me.”

“Hello, me.” His voice lifted a notch. “Is everything all right?”

“Well, that depends on how you look at it,” I replied.

“Beth, what’s happened?” His voice was suddenly serious.

“My family knows that you know. I didn’t have to tell them.”

“Jeez, that was quick. How’d they take it?”

“Not well,” I admitted. “But then Gabriel met with the Covenant and…”

“I’m sorry… the what?”

“It’s a circle of powers — it’s too complex to explain now, but they’re consulted whenever things go, um, off course.”

“Right… and what was the outcome?”

“Well… nothing.”

“What do you mean nothing?”

“They said that for now things can stay as they are.”

“What about us? What happens there?”

“Apparently I’m allowed to keep seeing you.”

“Well, that’s good news, isn’t it?”

“I think so but I’m not sure. Listen, Xavier, Gabe’s behaving strangely — he wants to have you over tonight for dinner.”

“Well, that sounds positive.” I remained silent, not sharing his optimism. “Relax, Beth, I think I can handle it.”

“I’m not sure I can.”

“We’ll get through it together,” Xavier said. “What time do you want me there?”

“Is seven okay?”

“No problem. See you then.”

“Xavier…,” I said, nibbling at a fingernail. “I’m worried. We’re being thrown in the deep end here. What if this goes badly? What if he has bad news? Do you think it’ll be bad news?”

“No, I don’t, now quit stressing. Please — for me?”

“Okay. I’m sorry. It’s just that our whole relationship is kind of hanging by a thread and they’ve been merciful so far, but this dinner could make or break it and I’m not sure why Gabe…”

“Oh, man,” Xavier groaned. “See what you’ve done — now I’m stressing.”

“You can’t! You’re the stable one!”

Xavier laughed and I realized his distress had been feigned to illustrate a point. He wasn’t worried in the slightest.

“Just relax. Go and run a bath or have a shot of brandy.”

“Okay.”

“That second bit was a joke. We both know you can’t hold your liquor.”

“You seem very relaxed about this.”

“That’s because I am. Beth, isn’t serenity meant to be, you know, your thing? You worry too much. Honestly, it’ll be fine. I’ll even dress to impress.”

“No, no, just come as you are!” I begged into the phone, but he had already hung up.

Xavier showed up right on time, wearing a pale gray pin-striped suit and blue silk tie. He’d done something to his hair so that it no longer flopped but was slicked back away from his face. Under his arm he carried a bunch of long-stemmed yellow roses, wrapped in green cellophane and tied with raffia. I did a double take when I opened the door. Xavier grinned when he saw my face.

“Too much?” he asked.

“No, it’s great!” I said, genuinely pleased with his efforts. But my face clouded again almost immediately.

“Then why do you look so terrified?” He gave me a self-assured wink. “They’re gonna love me.”

“Just don’t make any jokes — they don’t really get them.” I felt jittery and my knees were starting to shake.

“Okay — no jokes. Should I offer to say grace?” I had to giggle then; I couldn’t help myself.

Although I should have been playing host and showing him into the living room, we lingered at the door like co-conspirators. Not knowing what the evening had in store, my instinct was to delay it as long as possible. Besides, at that moment all I could think was that Xavier was mine and that we belonged to each other. He might have been overdressed for a casual impromptu dinner, but he cut a pretty striking figure with his broad shoulders, fathomless blue eyes, and smoothed-back hair. He was my very own fairy-tale hero. And, like a fairy-tale hero, I knew I could rely on him not to run for cover when the going got tough. Xavier would stand his ground, and any decisions he made would be based on reasoning of his own. If nothing else, I knew I could depend upon that.

Ivy adopted the role of host effortlessly. She was charmed by the flowers and made small talk as well as every effort to make Xavier feel comfortable throughout dinner. Judgment didn’t sit easily with Ivy, and her heart melted once she deemed a person to be sincere. Xavier’s sincerity was authentic. It was this genuineness that had earned him the role of school captain as well as his widespread popularity. Gabriel, on the other hand, watched Xavier with a wary eye.

My sister had gone to a good deal of trouble with the menu — she’d made an aromatic potato and leek soup followed by whole baked trout and a tray of roasted vegetables. I knew there’d be crème brûlée for dessert as I’d seen them in the fridge, wobbling in ramekins. Ivy had even sent Gabe out in search of a kitchen blowtorch to caramelize the sugar topping. She’d also set the table with our silverware and best china. The wine in the decanter tasted of berries, and there was sparkling water in a crystal jug.

The candles on the table cast a glow over all our faces. We ate in silence at first and the tension was palpable. Ivy looked from me to Xavier and smiled too much, while Gabriel sliced up his food savagely, as though he were imagining the potatoes on his plate to be Xavier’s head.

“Great meal,” Xavier said eventually, loosening his tie, his cheeks flushed from the wine.

“Thank you.” Ivy beamed with satisfaction. “I wasn’t sure what you might like.”

“I’m pretty easygoing but this is top class,” Xavier said, earning another wide grin from my sister.

For my part, I was still trying to work out the purpose of this unorthodox get-together. Surely Gabriel’s agenda included more than just socializing. Was he trying to gain an insight into Xavier’s personality? Did he still mistrust him? I wasn’t sure, and Gabriel still hadn’t spoken more than two words to any of us.

Eventually, even Ivy ran out of steam and the conversation died entirely. I caught Xavier staring intently at his plate as though the unfinished vegetables there might reveal the mysteries of the universe. I tried to nudge Ivy under the table with my foot, hoping to prompt further comment from her, but by accident got Xavier’s shin instead. It startled him and he jumped in his chair, almost spilling his drink. I retracted my foot with an apologetic smile and sat still.

“So, Xavier,” said Ivy, laying down her fork although her plate was still full. “What sort of things are you interested in?”

Xavier swallowed uneasily. “Er… just the usual…” He cleared his throat. “Sports, school, music.”

“What sports do you play?” Ivy asked, with a little too much enthusiam.

“Water polo, rugby, baseball, and lacrosse,” Xavier rattled off.

“He’s really good,” I added helpfully. “You should see him play. He’s actually captain of the water-polo team.” I couldn’t seem to stop babbling. “He’s also captain of the school… but you already know that.”

Ivy decided on a safer topic. “How long have you lived here at Venus Cove?”

“My whole life — I’ve never lived anywhere else.”

“Do you have brothers and sisters?”

“I come from a family of six kids.”

“I imagine that must be fun, being part of a big family.”

“Sometimes,” Xavier agreed. “Sometimes it’s just noisy. There’s never much privacy.”

Gabriel chose this moment to tactlessly cut in. “Speaking of privacy, I believe you recently made an interesting discovery?”

“Interesting isn’t quite the word I’d use,” Xavier replied, not at all caught off guard by the sudden attack.

“What word would you use?”

“Something more along the lines of mind-blowing.”

“However you want to describe it, we need to get some things clear.”

“I’m not going to tell anyone, if that’s what you’re worried about,” Xavier responded immediately. “I want to protect Beth as much as you do.”

“Bethany thinks very highly of you,” Gabriel said. “I hope her affection is not undeserved.”

“All I can say is that Beth’s very important to me, and I intend to look after her.”

“Where we come from, people are not judged by their words,” Gabriel said.

Xavier was unfazed. “Then you’ll have to wait and judge me by my actions.”

Although he made no attempt to relax the mood, I could see from the expression in Gabriel’s eyes that he was surprised by how well Xavier was handling the situation. He hadn’t allowed himself to be intimidated, and his greatest armor was his honesty. Anyone could see that Xavier was driven by his ethics. Even Gabriel had to admire that.

“You see, you and I have one vital thing in common,” Xavier continued. “We both love Beth.”

An impenetrable silence settled over the room. Gabriel and Ivy had not expected such a declaration and were taken aback. Perhaps in their own minds they had underestimated the strength of Xavier’s feelings for me. Even I couldn’t quite believe he had spoken those words out loud. I tried hard to keep my composure and continue eating quietly, but I couldn’t keep the smile from spreading across my face, and I reached for Xavier’s hand across the table. Gabriel looked pointedly in the opposite direction, but I only tightened my grip. The word love echoed in my brain, reverberating as though someone had screamed it through a loudspeaker. He loved me. Xavier Woods didn’t care that I was ghostly white, seriously lacking in understanding of his world, and had a tendency to molt white feathers. He still wanted me. He loved me. I was so happy that if Xavier’s grasp hadn’t been anchoring me, I might have floated away.

“In that case, we can fast-forward to the second point on tonight’s agenda,” said Gabriel, unexpectedly ill at ease now. “Bethany tends to walk straight into situations, and at the moment she has only us to look out for her.”

I was annoyed by how he spoke about me in the third person, as though I wasn’t present, but I decided that now wasn’t a good time to interrupt.

“If you’re going to be spending time with her, then we need to know that you can protect her,” Gabriel went on.

“Hasn’t Xavier proved himself already?” I demanded impatiently. I was eager to bring the dinner ordeal to an end. “He rescued me from Molly’s party, and nothing’s ever gone wrong when he’s been around.”

“Bethany lacks understanding about the ways of the world,” Gabriel said as though I hadn’t spoken. “She still has much to learn and that makes her vulnerable.”

“Do you have to make me sound like a full-time babysitting project?” I snapped.

“I happen to be an experienced babysitter,” Xavier joked. “I can show you my résumé if you’d like.”

Ivy was forced to smile behind her napkin at that, but when I searched Gabriel’s face for a change of expression, I didn’t find one.

“Are you sure you know what you’re getting yourself into?” Ivy asked, looking straight at Xavier.

“No,” he admitted. “But I’m prepared to find out.”

“You can’t turn back once you’ve placed your allegiance with us.”

“We’re not going to war,” I muttered under my breath. Everyone ignored me.

“I understand,” Xavier said, returning Ivy’s gaze.

“I don’t think you do,” Gabriel said softly. “But you will.”

“Is there anything else you think I should know?” asked Xavier.

“All in good time,” said Gabriel.

Finally, I found myself alone with Xavier. He sat on the edge of the bathtub while I brushed my teeth. I brushed them after every meal; it was a habit I’d gotten into.

“That wasn’t so bad.” Xavier leaned against the wall. “I was expecting worse.”

“You mean they haven’t scared you off?”

“Nah,” Xavier said causally. “Your brother’s a bit intense, but your sister’s cooking makes up for it.”

I laughed. “Don’t worry about Gabe — he’s always like that.”

“I’m not worried — he kind of reminds me of my mom.”

“Don’t tell him that,” I giggled.

“I thought you didn’t use makeup,” Xavier said, picking up a stick of eyeliner from the counter.

“I bought it to make Molly happy,” I said, rummaging around for the mouthwash. “She’s turned me into her project.”

“Is that so?” Xavier said. “Well, I happen to like you the way you are.”

“Thanks,” I said. “But I think you could do with a touch-up.”

I grinned and waved the eyeliner at him.

“No, you don’t,” said Xavier ducking out of my reach. “No way.”

“Why not?” I sulked.

“Because I’m a man,” Xavier said. “And men don’t wear makeup unless they’re emo or play in a boy band.”

“Please?” I wheedled.

His brilliant blue almond-shaped eyes seemed to sparkle. “Okay…”

“Really?” I brightened.

“No! I’m not that much of a pushover.”

“Fine,” I pouted. “I’ll just have to make you smell like a girl. ..”

Before he could stop me, I grabbed a bottle of perfume and squirted him in the chest. He sniffed his shirt curiously.

“Fruity,” he concluded, “with a hint of musk.”

I collapsed into laughter. “You’re ridiculous.”

“I think you mean irresistible,” Xavier said.

“Yes,” I agreed, “ridiculously irresistible.”

I leaned forward to kiss him, just as there came a knock at the door. Ivy poked her head into the room and Xavier and I sprang apart.

“Your brother sent me to check on you,” she said with a raised eyebrow. “To make sure you aren’t up to no good.”

“Actually,” I began indignantly, “we were just—”

“Heading outside,” Xavier cut in. I opened my mouth to argue, but he shot me a sharp look. “It’s their house, we play by their rules,” he murmured. As he steered me out of the room, I noticed Ivy looking at him with a new respect.

Outside, we sat on the garden swing with our arms around each other. Xavier disentangled himself long enough to roll up his shirtsleeves and then throw Phantom’s frayed tennis ball across the grass. Phantom always retrieved but then refused to relinquish, so the soggy ball had to be pried from between his teeth. Xavier stretched back to throw the ball again and then rinsed his hands under the garden tap. I breathed in his clean, woody scent. All I could think was that we had survived our first test relatively unscathed. Xavier had been true to his word and had not allowed himself to be intimidated. On the contrary, he had held his ground with unswerving conviction. Not only did I admire him more than ever, but I also relished that he was in my house, this time as a legitimate guest rather than an intruder.

“I could stay here all night,” I murmured into his shirt.

“You know what’s so strange?” he said.

“What?”

“How normal this feels.”

He twisted my hair around his fingers and I saw, reflected in his gesture, our lives entwined.

“Ivy was being dramatic when she said there’s no turning back,” I said.

“It’s okay, Beth. I don’t want my life to go back to the way it was before I met you. I thought I had it all, but really I was missing something. I feel like a completely different person now. This might sound corny, but I feel like I’ve been asleep for a long time, and you’ve just woken me up…” He paused. “I can’t believe I just said that. What are you doing to me?”

“Turning you into a poet,” I teased.

“Me?” Xavier growled in mock anger. “Poetry’s for girls.”

“You were great back there. I’m so proud of the way you handled yourself.”

“Thank you. Who knows, maybe a few decades from now your brother and sister might actually like me.”

“I wish we had that long.” I sighed and immediately regretted the words. They had just slipped out. I could have kicked myself for being so stupid; what a perfect way to ruin the mood.

Xavier was so silent, I wondered if he’d even heard me. Then I felt his warm fingers under my chin, and he tilted my face up so we were looking eye to eye. He leaned down and kissed me softly, the sweet taste of his lips lingering after he pulled away. He bent forward and murmured in my ear, “We will find a way. That’s a promise.”

“You can’t know that,” I said. “This is different. ..”

“Beth.” Xavier put a finger against my lips. “I don’t break my promises.”

“But…”

“No buts… just trust me.”

When Xavier left, no one wanted to go to bed even though it was already past midnight. Gabriel we knew was an insomniac. It wasn’t unusual for him or Ivy to stay up till the early hours of the morning. But this time all three of us were restless and alert. Ivy suggested a hot drink and was already pulling milk out of the fridge when Gabriel cut in.

“I have a better idea,” he said. “I think we all deserve to unwind.”

Ivy and I guessed his meaning immediately and didn’t even bother trying to hide our excitement.

“Do you mean right now?” Ivy said, the milk carton almost slipping from her grasp.

“Of course, right now. But we have to hurry; it’ll be light in a few hours.”

Ivy let out a squeal. “Just give us a moment to change! We’ll be right back.”

I too could hardly contain my anticipation. This would be the perfect way to express the exhilaration I was feeling about the direction my relationship with Xavier had taken. It had been so long since I’d had a chance to really stretch my wings. My cliff-diving performance for Xavier hardly qualified as exercise. If anything, it had only served to whet my appetite and remind me how stiff and cramped my wings really felt. I had tried spreading them out and floating around my bedroom with the curtains pulled tight shut, but I’d only crashed into the ceiling fan and bumped my legs on the furniture. As I changed into a loose T-shirt, I felt a bolt of adrenaline shoot through my body. I was going to really savor this predawn flight. I went downstairs, and the three of us made our way silently out to the black Jeep parked in the garage.

It was a different experience driving along the coastal road that unfurled like a ribbon in the early morning. The air was fragrant with the scent of pine, and the trees were tipped with green. The sea looked solid, like a velvet mantle that had been draped over part of the earth. Along the residential streets, the shutters were all closed, and the streets were deserted as if the occupants had suddenly packed up and evacuated. The township, when we drove through it, was also deserted. I’d never seen Venus Cove asleep. I was so used to seeing people everywhere: riding bikes, eating fries on the pier, or buying jewelry from local craftsmen who set up their stalls on the pavement. But at that hour of the morning, there was a stillness that made me imagine we were the only living beings in the world. I wondered why people referred to the early hours of the morning as “ungodly” when in fact that was the very best time to connect with the forces above.

Gabriel drove for about an hour along a straight stretch of road, then turned onto a bumpy scrub-lined track that seemed to wind toward the sky like a corkscrew. I knew where we were. Gabriel was taking the route to White Mountain, named because of the snow that sometimes coated its peak, despite its coastal location. You could see the mountain’s outline from Venus Cove, like a pale gray monolith rising against a star-studded night sky.

There was fog up on the mountain, and the higher we drove the thicker it became. When Gabriel could no longer distinguish the road ahead he parked and we climbed out. We were standing on a narrow and winding road that continued uphill; tall fir trees, like soldiers, surrounded us on all sides, almost completely blocking out the sky. The tips of the trees were studded with beads of dew, and we could see our breath materialized in the cold air when we exhaled. The ground underfoot was sodden with leaves and bark, muffling our footsteps. Moss-covered branches and tendrils of ferns brushed against our faces. We veered off the road, disappearing into the dense forest. Shafts of moonlight sliced through the canopy in places, like little spotlights illuminating our way. The trees whispered softly to one another and we could hear gentle rustling and the scampering of small paws. Despite the darkness none of us felt afraid. We knew the mountain was completely secluded. No one would find us there.

Ivy was the first to cast off her jacket and do what we were all waiting to do. She stood facing us, her back straight and her head thrown back so that her pale hair cascaded like a golden nimbus around her face and shoulders. In the moonlight she glowed like a lamp, and her sculpted figure looked like marble, white and flawless. Her body curved perfectly, each limb as long and elegant as a sapling.

“See you up there,” she said like an excited child. She closed her eyes briefly, took a deep breath, and then sprinted away from us. She ran swiftly and nimbly through the trees, her feet barely touching the ground and gathered speed until she was almost a blur. Then she became suddenly airborne. There was a breathtaking artistry in it — Ivy made it look as easy as a swan taking flight. Her wings, slender but powerful, sliced through the loose T-shirt she wore and reared Heavenward like living entities. The wings that looked as solid as stone when stationary shone like satin in full flight.

I broke into a run and felt my own wings begin to pulse and then tear through their cage of cloth. Once released, their beating grew faster, and I too was lifted into the air to join Ivy. We flew in synchronization for a while, gliding slowly upward, then dipping suddenly, and finally coming to land on the soles of our feet on the branches of a nearby tree. From there we looked down at Gabriel with radiant faces. Ivy bent and let herself topple from the tree. The span of her wings broke her fall, and she swooped upward again with a gasp of pleasure.

“What are you waiting for?” she called down to Gabriel before she disappeared into a cloud.

Gabriel, who never did anything in a hurry, methodically peeled off layers and tossed aside his boots. He pulled his T-shirt over his head, and we watched his wings unfurl until the genteel music teacher had disappeared and he looked like the majestic celestial warrior he was created to be. This was the angel who, eons ago, had singlehandedly reduced a city to ash and stone. His entire figure shone like burnished brass. Even in flight his style was different from ours, lacking in urgency, more structured and meditative.

Above the treetops I was enveloped by mist and cloud. Droplets of water gathered on my back, and I felt their crisp bite. My wings beat furiously and lifted me higher. I abandoned thought and soared, letting my body twist and turn, looping around the trees. I felt the release of energy that had been pent up for so long. I saw Gabriel stop midair once to ascertain that I hadn’t lost control. Ivy I only spotted every now and then as an amber glow through the mist.

For the most part interaction was kept to a minimum. This was our own personal time to feel whole again and embrace the kind of freedom that could only ever truly be felt in the Kingdom of Heaven. Our oneness was beyond the power of language to convey. Our humanity dropped away as we experienced our true selves.

We flew like this for what must have been several hours, until Gabriel emitted a low melodic hum, like the note of an oboe, which we knew was the signal to come down.

As we climbed into the Jeep, I thought there was no chance of my going to sleep once we got home. I was too jubilant, and it would be hours before I came down from my high. But I was wrong. The car trip back along the winding road was so rhythmic that I fell asleep curled on the backseat like a kitten long before Byron came into view.