A Farce To Be Reckoned With

Chapter 1

It was a special embarrassment for Ylith to find herself shut up in a box. She hadn't had that one tried on her since the infatuated King Priam of Troy had constructed a special box in which he hoped to put Ylith once he caught her. But he never caught her. And now Troy was long gone, and Priam along with it, and Ylith was still here, at least partially because she didn't put her head into boxes.

It only goes to show you, she thought, no sense being too proud. Just look at me now. In a box.

A pale luminous glow filled the box, revealing fields, hedges, and a line of mountains in the background.

She heard a man's soft voice at her ear.

"Ylith, what are you doing here? You seem to be in trouble. Let me help."

The lights in the box came up brighter.

"Who am I talking to?" Ylith asked.

"It's Zeus," the voice said. "I can still do things like that, even in my present reduced circumstances. But you haven't told me what you're doing here."

"Some guy kidnapped me and locked me up in here." Ylith had met Father Zeus once before, when she had been trying out for a part as a nature spirit during the Greek Revival period in Rome. Zeus had said he'd let her know, and she hadn't thought about it since.

"Why won't he let you out?" Zeus asked.

"He's afraid I'll kill him. And I will, too!"

Zeus sighed. "You sound like my daughter, Artemis. Talk about implacable! Why not try a little dissimulation?"

"What do you mean?"

"Tell this kidnapper you like the idea of being locked up in a box by him."

"He'd never believe that!"

"Try it. Kidnappers are goofy. Tell him anything. Just get free."

"You mean lie?"

"Of course."

"That wouldn't be honest!"

"You could make amends later. That's what I always did, when I remembered. Meanwhile, you'd be free."

"But we're not supposed to lie," Ylith said, though her voice was irresolute.

"Now, my dear, talk again to this human and get him to see things your way. Get back out into the world.

You're too pretty to stay shut up in a box."

Later, after she had composed herself and looked to her makeup, Ylith cried out, "Westfall? You still there?"

"Yes, I'm here."

"Aren't you supposed to be at work or something?"

"Of course. But frankly, I'm afraid of leaving you alone. I mean, maybe you could get out — or at least enchant me."

"I could enchant you anyhow," Ylith said in a sultry voice. "But you really think I'm such a vicious witch?"

"Well," Westfall said, "after you lit into me as you did, I figured I'd better be prepared for the worst."

"You got me sore," Ylith said. "No woman likes to be suddenly snatched out of what she's doing and shut into a box and delivered to somebody as if she were merchandise.

Witches are only human, you know, even the most angelic of us. We want to be courted like real ladies, not pushed around like antique tarts."

"I understand all that now," Westfall said. "But now it is too late."

"Not necessarily," Ylith said, and her voice dripped honey.

"Really?" Westfall said.

"Open the lid, Westfall. I won't hurt you. I promise on my word as an angel. Let's see how we get along."

Westfall took a deep breath and opened the lid.

Ylith came out smoking, doing her witch's impersonation of Hecate.

Westfall screamed, "You promised not to hurt me!"

The chambers were suddenly quite empty. Westfall was in a dark corner of Limbo, and Ylith had taken to the air to report back to Michael. Pandora's box was still open and glistening faintly.