Through the Zombie Glass

Chapter 18 Tweedledee and Tweedledum Dumb

“Don’t you need to get back out there?” I asked Gavin as I unlocked my front door. “There could be a flood of zombies tonight.” Even though I hadn’t noticed a rabbit cloud during the drive home. Yeah, I’d finally broken down and looked.

“It’s doubtful. You woke a nest. That’s the only reason those zombies came out when they did.”

I paused in the open doorway and faced him, my arms spread to block his path. “Well, don’t you need to be out there putting Blood Lines around the homes of the innocent?”

His lips curled at the corners. “Mr. Ankh and Mr. Holland have been taking care of that. Now, aren’t you going to invite me in?”

Sure. In...never. “I don’t want to be rude, but—”

“Good. Then don’t be rude.” He picked me up and set me aside. “I’m spending the rest of the evening with you, then crashing on your couch.”

Exasperated, I entered behind him. Did he think I’d leave and go on a killing rampage?

Like you can really blame him.

“Sorry, but we don’t have a couch.” We’d been buying one piece of furniture at a time, when we found cheap but reliable pieces, and so far had only managed to pick up two beds and a dining room table.

“Uh, are you sure about that?” He sounded amused.

“Maybe not,” I said, my tone dry. “I only live here.” I shut and locked the door before nailing him with a glare.

“Now, now. Don’t look at me like that,” he said, chucking me under the chin. “I saw the video, and I know what you’re capable of, but I also know you wanted to bite Cole that night—and this one. The look in your eyes, the way you licked your lips... I’ve seen zombies do that. But the bottom line? You didn’t do it. Before, you turned your hunger on the zombies, and today you somehow managed to snap yourself out of it. I respect the kind of strength that took.”

He was...right, I realized. Z.A. had controlled me, darkened my mind, yet I’d had the strength to fight her. Hope bloomed brighter than it had in days, as pretty as a flower opening in the sun. Maybe I wasn’t such a terrible menace after all.

“If you aren’t afraid of what I’ll do, why do you want to stay here?” I asked, waving my hand at—

A furnished and decorated living room. I frowned and bustled forward. “Nana,” I called.

“Ali, dear. You’re home.” Dusting her hands together, she snaked around the hallway corner. “Oh, no. You’re injured. What happened?”

“The usual,” I said, then motioned to the new furnishings. “How much did all of this cost?”

She fidgeted with the hem of her shirt. “Don’t you worry about that. I gave myself a budget and stuck to it.”

“Nana,” I said.

My expression must have betrayed my thoughts, because she said, “I know you want to save to buy a house of our own, but I don’t want us living like paupers while we do it.”

Okay. All right. If she wanted this stuff, then I wanted her to have it.

I hugged her tight and kissed her on the temple. “Everything looks amazing, Nana. Seriously.”

“I’m so glad you think so. Wait till you see your bedroom,” she said with a smile.

Gavin cleared his throat, and Nana peeked around me.

“Oh, I’m so sorry, Gavin. I didn’t realize you were here. It’s lovely to see you again.” Her gaze moved over him, widened. “I’m guessing you ran into the same bit of usual trouble my Ali did.”

“Yes, ma’am, I sure did.”

She gulped. “There were others with you? And everyone...survived?”

“More than. We thrived.” He shook off his coat and draped the fabric over his arm. “I don’t know about you, but I’m starving. I’d love a chance to cook you dinner to thank you for allowing me to sleep on your couch.”

Wait. The he-slut of the great South knew how to cook?

Nana’s gaze met mine for a split second, her mouth forming a small O. “You’re staying the night?”

“If it’s all right with you. I’ll behave, you have my word.”

“Are you two...”

“No,” I rushed out, at the same time Gavin said, “We’re debating it.”

I glared at him. “We’re better off as friends.”

“In that case, it’ll be nice having a man around,” Nana said, once again dusting her hands together. “I bought a bookcase I wasn’t looking forward to putting together.”

“I’ll do it,” he said. “I’m always ready for a chance to be a hero.”

She giggled like a schoolgirl—a dirty, dirty schoolgirl—and I did a double take. “You already are. The bookcase can wait until after dinner, though. I’ve got a few more things to arrange in my room.”

The moment we were alone, I anchored my hands on my hips. “Will you please stop forgetting you’re into brunettes?”

“I realized I can’t see hair color in the dark.”

Oh, wow. “However will I continue to resist such wondrous flattery?”

Smiling, he swept around me and entered the kitchen. “What can’t be manufactured is attitude, and I happen to like yours.”

I came in behind him and opened the fridge to grab something to drink. It was now fully stocked with all my favorites. Orange juice, milk, protein shakes, fruits, vegetables and even the chocolate cupcakes I liked to eat cold. I groaned.

“What?” Gavin said.

“She spent too much money on me.”

“Most girls wouldn’t complain about that.”

I selected one of the shakes. “Most girls don’t have my Nana. I want to pamper her, not the other way around.”

Gavin reached in behind me to snag a juice. Our arms brushed, and I scowled up at him.

“Stop trying to seduce me,” I said.

“Why? Is it working?”

“If you like to be stabbed, yes.”

“I’ve let girls do a lot worse to me.”

I shook my head, exasperated.

“Look, I don’t want to go home. I’ve been dividing my time between Cole’s house, a crappy motel and the homes of the women I’m fu...screwing.”

“You can say it. My ears won’t melt off.”

He snorted. “Cole says we’re not to cuss around you. Potty mouth is contagious, I guess. Anyway. A guy can only take so much. I’m desperate for a break.”

Well, I couldn’t exactly kick him out now. I wasn’t that cruel.

I nodded my agreement before moving around him.

He grinned at me, his eyes alight with mischief. “You act all proper now, but in the visions, you’ve definitely got a lady boner for me.”

I choked on a laugh. “Lady boner?”

He shrugged. “I kinda like knowing there are two sides to you and I’m the one responsible.”

Two sides to me. He had no idea one of those sides was the enemy. “Gavin.”

“Nah. You don’t need to put me in my place again. Whether you admit it or not, you’re softening toward me.”

Absolutely, but not in the way he wanted.

A knock sounded at the door, and I stiffened.

“I bet that’s Cole,” he said with a sigh. “I expected him sooner.”

No way. Cole wouldn’t come after me. Not after the public rejection I’d just dished. And yet I was trembling as I opened the door. Annnd...sure enough, tall, strong and impossibly beautiful Cole waited on the other side.

Sweet mercy.

“Kat and Reeve are both fine,” he said, one arm propped against the wooden frame. “They’re with Frosty and Bronx.”

“Did the guys hurt Ethan?”

“No. He was pretty freaked out by what he’d seen. They questioned him, nothing more.”

I covered my throat with my hand, a protective action. “What did he see?”

“Apparently you looked as if you wanted to eat Kat and Reeve at one point, and not in the good way.”

I wasn’t going to touch that statement. “Well.” I cleared my throat. “Thank you for the update, but it’s getting late and you’re probably wanted at home.”

He shook his head. “Sorry, babe, but I’m not leaving.”

What, was this disagree with Ali day? “It’s for your own good, Cole.”

“Right now I’d rather be bad and deal with the consequences later.”

Please be bad. Very, very bad. Downright naughty.

I shivered, and the shiver made me mad. So did my treacherous mind. “You might not survive these particular consequences.” I smiled with saccharine sweetness—and tried to shut the door in his face.

He shouldered his way inside. “I’m willing to risk it.”

Argh!

“Hey, Cole,” Gavin called from the kitchen. “You staying for dinner?”

Cole would have seen his car in the driveway and known Gavin was here, but still his back went iron-bar straight at the sound of the other guy’s voice. “Are you the chef?”

“I am.”

Cole marched forward and settled into a bar stool as if he owned it. “Good. I’m starved.”

This could not be happening.

“We’ve got the stuff for enchiladas or roast beef sandwiches,” Gavin said, glancing at me.

“Enchiladas,” Cole replied.

“Sandwiches it is, then,” Gavin said.

Cole offered him a chilling smile.

Oh, glory. If they decided to play Animal Planet, I’d...let them, I decided. Both would end up unconscious and I would no longer be trapped in this tug-of-war. Sure, I’d have to clean a pool of blood, but just then that actually seemed like the better choice. We had plenty of baking soda and vinegar.

While Gavin puttered around the kitchen, Cole swiveled in the chair to face me. “How are you feeling?”

“Fine,” I said, taking the seat next to him. I could be polite. “How about you?

“Better.” He reached out, pinched a lock of my hair. “I’m not afraid of you, you know.”

“You should be.” I was. I tugged my hair from his grip. Softly, I added, “But we both know that’s not our only problem.”

He blanched, and I felt guilty. I shouldn’t feel guilty.

“I know what you’re thinking, and that’s not what I meant,” I said and sighed.

“Then what?”

“I’ll...have to show you.” I motioned to the hall—my bedroom—with a tilt of my chin.

He nodded, something hot and dark in his eyes.

“Once again it’s not what you’re thinking,” I said drily.

I think he...pouted.

What do you know—here was yet another side to Cole.

“Don’t you want to show me, too?” Gavin said, his tone a little tight. He chopped the lettuce with more force.

“Not this,” I replied, trying to be gentle. “I’m sorry.”

“Don’t apologize to him,” Cole snapped.

O-kay. The ice was back.

“He’s my guest,” I said, “and I like him, and he’s acting civil. He deserved an apology from me, so I gave it, and now he deserves one from you. I’m not leaving this spot until he gets it.”

Gavin smirked.

Cole gritted out a very mean “Sorry.”

“Good. Let’s go.” As Cole and I stood, another knock sounded at my door. Dang it, who was that? Considering my luck, it was probably Veronica. “Just a sec.” I stomped to the door. This time, I found Justin waiting on the other side. “You’ve got to be kidding me.”

Cole came up behind me, the intense heat he radiated a caress against my skin. “What are you doing here?”

A bundle of energy, Justin couldn’t seem to stand still. “You told me to contact you if I had news. Well, I have news, and besides that, I thought you told Ali what’s going on.”

Cole glanced over his shoulder, saying, “You should have called.”

“No way. This was too big.”

“What is?” I asked at the same time Gavin called, “Who is it?”

Justin pressed his lips into a thin line. He backed up, saying, “Sorry. Didn’t realize. I’ll text you as soon as I get inside my car.”

The door shut with a soft click. He’d better hurry. Curiosity was now in the process of eating me alive.

“You were going to show me something,” Cole prompted.

I nodded, and led him past the kitchen. Gavin glanced up from the loaf of potato bread he was slicing, frowned. “Seriously? You’re abandoning me?”

“Only for a few minutes.”

“You don’t owe him an explanation, either,” Cole said, dragging me away. “And I’m not apologizing again.”

I think Gavin flipped him off, but I couldn’t be sure. In the hall, I heard Nana humming under her breath.

“We have another guest,” I called.

She stuck her head out of the door and brightened. “Cole. It’s wonderful to see you.”

“You, too.”

She arched a brow when she noticed my hand on the knob of my door. “You’re going in there...alone?”

“Just for a few minutes,” I said.

Her eyes narrowed, but she nodded. “I’ll be watching the clock.”

I stepped inside—only to gasp. She had decorated my room with everything she knew I’d love. The furnishings were a dark cherrywood and polished to a glossy shine. Wispy white curtains covered my window, and a framed picture of Emma and me hung on the wall. She was in front of me, wrapped in my arms, and we were both smiling our biggest smiles.

There was a note taped to the border.

Angels must have held this photo in their hands, because that’s the only way it could have survived the bomb. I had it framed weeks ago, but wanted to wait to give it to you at Christmas. This seemed like a better time.

Love, Nana

Oh, Nana, I thought as tears welled in my eyes.

“You’re both adorable,” Cole said, stepping up behind me to study the photo. “You look so happy.”

“We were. We’d just finished playing hide-and-seek in the house, and of course, she had won. She always won. My legs were too long to fit anywhere. She was gloating in that sweet way she had—nah, nah, nah, I’m the crown champion again—so I snatched her up to tickle her. Mom demanded we pose.”

He squeezed my shoulder. “I have one of my mom and me, taken a few weeks before she died. It’s more valuable to me than my heart and lungs.”

I liked when he shared something from his past. He didn’t do it often. I turned, met his gaze.

He hooked a strand of hair behind my ear. I could feel myself getting lost in the moment, in him, so when his phone beeped a few seconds later, I jumped. I also sighed with relief.

“Go ahead,” I said. “Check it.”

He hesitated a moment before scrolling through the message, his features darkening as he read. “Justin says the spy is someone who was at the park tonight. Information about the fight has already hit Anima.”

“So...that rules out Collins and Cruz. And Frosty and Bronx were too busy rescuing Kat and Reeve to hand out any details.”

“Not necessarily, but I know them better than I know myself, and they’d never help the enemy. I’ve never suspected them.”

Had he ever suspected me? “You can rule out Lucas and Trina, too. I watched the spy watch them, remember? So that leaves...Veronica.”

“You saw a male in the forest.”

“Yes, and she could be working with him.”

“Maybe.” His gaze locked with mine and searched. “There’s also Gavin.”

My hand fluttered to my throat, rubbed. Gavin... He had to be innocent. And yet he wanted to stay the night here, no matter how uncomfortable he’d be on the couch. Maybe not because he hated the motel, after all, but to keep tabs on me and my dark metamorphosis.

“Anyway, they weren’t the only ones there,” Cole reminded me.

“Me?” I squeaked.

He rolled his eyes. “I never suspected you. I mean Kat. Reeve.”

“Girl. Girl.”

“Like you said, a girl could be working with a boy.”

“Besides,” I continued, “there’s no way Kat would betray us, and Reeve doesn’t know anything.”

“Kat has no filter. She—”

“Isn’t responsible,” I insisted.

“What about Ethan?”

“Bronx has already looked into him. Found nothing suspicious.”

After a short pause, he nodded. “That leaves us with...yeah, Gavin and Veronica. But I’ve already checked, and they came out clean. As you know, that’s the reason I spent so much time with her. I was going through her stuff, checking everything she said. Nothing dubious came up. More than that, the problems started before the pair got here.”

“Maybe you didn’t dig deep enough. Maybe one or both were working for Anima before they got here and asked to be assigned to your team. Talk to Mr. Ankh and your dad. They’ll have ideas about what to—”

“No way. My reasons for staying quiet are still the same. I won’t blacken someone’s name without at least a little proof.”

“Yeah, but once the truth comes to light, whoever you’ve accused will be vindicated. Or not.”

He shook his head, saying, “The problem is, my closest friends will know I didn’t trust them. Maybe they’ll forgive me, maybe not, but from that moment on, no matter what I do, what I say, they’ll always wonder at my motives. That stuff doesn’t leave a person.”

Had he ever been accused of something he hadn’t done?

I must have asked the question aloud because he said, “When Justin started working with Anima, he hung around my team for information, just like the newest spy. I knew something was going on and stupidly blamed Boots and Ducky, members of the team you never got to meet.” As he spoke, he rubbed the tattoos of their names. “They were so mad at me, so hurt, they went hunting that night, I guess to prove their loyalty, and they found a nest of zombies. That’s the night they were killed. I can’t go through something like that again.”

“Cole—” I said, but he stopped me with another shake of his head.

“I’ll do more digging with Gavin and Veronica. And now let’s close this subject and revisit at another date. You said you had something to show me. Was it a kiss?” He backed me into the door, putting his body in front of me, and the hardwood in back of me, effectively caging me. And oh, good glory, had I just used the word hardwood? “Lately I haven’t been able to think about anything else.”

“Cole. No.”

“Just one more,” he said raggedly. “Then we’ll stop. Then maybe the madness will finally end and we’ll be able to be friends. I know you said we couldn’t be, but I don’t like the thought of being without you. I need you in my life, at least in some way.”

“Friends don’t kiss.” Besides, I’d already had my one more. Whimper. “Nana would hear us, we aren’t always quiet. She’ll come to the door, knock. I’ll be hugely embarrassed.”

“Okay.” He anchored his palms at my temples. “Okay.”

I had to stop breathing. He smelled too good, the scent of him invading my senses, making me dizzy with need and want and breaking through whatever new walls I’d managed to build against him. “You’re not acting like it’s okay.”

“When is the madness going to end?” he asked. “I must be obsessed with you, Ali. Addicted. Whatever I feel is definitely unhealthy. Without you, I’m having trouble eating and sleeping. I think about you all the time, wonder what you’re doing, and who you’re doing it with. Do you know how many times I’ve been tempted to hunt you down and just carry you away?”

“Cole—”

He wasn’t done. “You’re smart, fierce, brave. You have a habit of staring off into space, your mind lost to your memories. When you love, you love with your whole heart. And your compassion... When Holly Dumfries went on a date with Chad Stevens, Kerry Goldberg—Chad’s ex—dumped a bottle of water on Holly the next day at school. You helped Holly clean up, even switched shirts with her. Yeah. I checked into the shirt thing. Then, when everyone made fun of Aubrey Wilson for getting pregnant, you offered to throw her a baby shower.”

My eyes were so wide they had to look like saucers. I’d had no idea he’d known about Holly and Aubrey, and the fact that he did, that he’d kept tabs on me... My knees were threatening to buckle.

“What am I going to do with you?” he asked softly. He pressed his forehead into mine. “I’ve thought about sending Gavin back to Georgia, but then I feared something would happen to force you to follow him, and I wouldn’t be able to see you.”

“Cole—”

“You were right to call me a coward before. I’m afraid of the future, Ali. I can’t stand the thought of you with him, so how am I going to survive the reality of it?”

I wanted to wrap my arms around him, which is exactly why I pushed him away. “You don’t trust me when I say I’m not interested in him in a romantic way, and that I’m not ever going to be interested in him. You trust the visions more than you trust me and my feelings, and I deserve better.”

There was torment in his eyes as he muttered, “You’re right.”

And like that, something seemed to break inside him.

He fell onto the bed, put his elbows on his knees and his head in his hands. He stayed like that for a long while, simply breathing.

“Are you okay?” I asked softly.

“Not yet, but I will be.” He looked up, and I saw determination swimming in his eyes.

Determination to what?

It kind of...scared me.

I turned my back on him. Trembling, I said, “By the way, some of your friends aren’t happy with you lately. You’ve been really mean, apparently.” There. A safer topic.

“You want me to be nicer to them?” he asked almost carefully.

“Yes.”

He pushed out a breath. “Then I’ll be nicer.”

That easily? “Thank you.” I drew him toward the vanity. I sat down, keeping my gaze downcast. “Now, what I wanted to show you. Take a look at my reflection.”

“All right.” He remained at my back, his hands steady on my shoulders. “Is there something specific you want me to notice?”

“Watch what happens,” I said, and opened my eyes.

Z.A. grinned at me, and there was blood on her teeth.

My blood?

“What do you see?” I asked Cole, trying not to fidget.

He lifted my hair, bent down and placed a soft kiss at the curve of my neck. I stiffened, and his grip hardened, as did his gaze; he straightened. “I see you.”

A dangerous shiver stole through me. “No,” I said. “What do you see in the mirror?”

In the glass, his gaze met hers. He frowned. “I still see you.”

My brow furrowed with confusion. “You don’t see the black smudges?”

“No,” he said.

“Please. Introduce us.” She chuckled, the sound low and creepy. “He might prefer me.”

“Did you hear that?” I asked, clutching my stomach.

“Hear what?”

“Her.”

Comprehension dawned. “The dark presence you mentioned?”

I nodded.

“I didn’t.”

Dang it. Why? He could see and hear spirits in any form. He could see and hear Emma. Why not Z.A., too?

A hard knock pounded at my door. “Dinner’s ready,” Gavin called.

Scowling, Cole straightened. I stood, a little relieved.

“We’ll continue this later,” he said. A promise.

“All right.” An evasion.

We were silent as we headed into the kitchen.