The Plant

from the office of the editor-in-chief TO: John DATE: 4/3/81

MESSAGE: First, no blubbering on the blotter—blotters cost money, and as you know, all expenses must now be forwarded to the parent company on a week by week basis (if we needed another sign that The End Is Near, surely that's it). Blubber in your wastebasket... or go on down to Riddley's former quarters and water the plant with your grateful tears.

(Yes, I know perfectly well that no one is paying the slightest attention to my strong recommendation that we all stay clear of the ivy. I could put it in writing, I suppose, but it would just be a waste of ink. Especially since I've been down there a time or two myself, breathing deep and drawing inspiration.)

Second, how can you call the Detweiller business a fuck-up, considering how it has turned out? Harlow Enders and Apex may not know we're ready to turn the corner into a glorious future, but we do!

Third, Alan Williams checked the files over there. Last Survivor was supposedly read (or scanned, or perhaps just shifted from the envelope it came in to the one it went back in) and rejected in November of 1978. The editor who signed off on it was one George Flynn, who left publishing to set up his own job-printing business in Brooklyn about a year ago. According to AW, and I quote, “George Flynn had the editorial antennae of a rutabaga.”

Fourth, don't give the ms. to LaShonda. Make the copies yourself, and remember the false title page.

Fifth (I'm ready for a fifth, believe me), please no more memos until at least afternoon. I know I said “everything in writing” from here on out, but my head is starting to ache. I have one from Bill I haven't even looked at.

Roger