The Final Expedition

Day One Hundred and Forty-Three

As I pulled myself into Zvezda, I could hear heated voices within.

“He’s gone? What do you mean, he’s gone?” Karpov growled at Aki.

“I just came from the Kibo Module.” She replied. “As I left, I noticed the hatch to the Columbus Module was open. He’s not in there!”

“Flynn’s escaped?!” I asked. “Where the hell could he have gone? It’s not like he can make a break for it. Unless…” I glanced towards the hatch to the Soyuz capsule.

“No.” Karpov replied. “He’s not been trained for piloting the Soyuz capsule.”

“Then where the hell is he?” I turned to Aki, and on seeing the concern on her face I had another thought. “Actually, more to the point, where is Natalya?”

“Last time I saw her, she was heading for the Cupola.” Aki replied.

“Oh no!” I hurled myself back out of the Zvezda module and pulled myself towards the Cupola as quickly as I could, my pulse racing, terrified of what I might find.

“Natalya!” I yelled, my voice echoing down the inside of the station. No answer. I briefly squeezed my eyes shut and silently prayed. ‘Please God, don’t let him have finished what he’d started before’. I reached the Unity node and swung myself left through the hatch into the Tranquillity module. My heart in my mouth, I peered cautiously through the hatch in the floor which led into the Cupola, praying that Flynn wasn’t there. I breathed a sigh of relief. Natalya was gazing out at the surface of the Earth and had some earphones in. I reached out to touch her shoulder, which startled her. She smiled when she realised it was me.

“Sorry.” She said, taking the earphones out. “I was listening to the last message from my parents. Even though I know they’re gone, it’s comforting to hear their voices.” The sun started to come up on the far side of the Earth. “I know everything on the surface is either dead or dying.” She continued wistfully. “But it’s still just as beautiful when the sun rises.”

“Flynn’s loose.” I told her, interrupting her reverie.

“What?!” She looked up at me in alarm.

“Aki just found the hatch open.” I told her. “We should get back to Zvezda and search the station with the others. There are only so many places he can be.”

We spent the next half an hour checking every corner of the station, looking within the Soyuz capsules, the Progress resupply vessel, the storage modules, everyone’s sleeping quarters, everywhere, but with no sign of Flynn. Having checked within the hydroponics module attached to the Kibo module, I made my way back towards the Zvezda module to tell Karpov, who was co-ordinating the search. As I passed the Quest airlock, something caught my eye. Light was shining through the small circular window in the door. I peered through the window. The exterior hatch was open, sunlight shining in. I felt my blood run cold.

“Everyone!” I shouted. “I think I know where Flynn has gone!”

“I found his body floating outside.” Morrison confirmed, taking off his helmet as he emerged from the airlock. “No spacesuit, so his corpse was in really bad shape.” I noticed his eyes take on a faraway look for a moment as he recalled the memory. “I’ve seen bodies before, but not like this… frozen solid with his mouth and eyes wide open, like he was trying to scream… not a good way to die.”

“What did you do with him?” Aki asked gently, squeezing his arm through the sleeve of his spacesuit.

“I pushed him away from the station.” Morrison replied. “I thought it would be best not to bring him back.” Karpov nodded thoughtfully.

“Who was the last person to see him alive?” He asked.

“Probably me.” Morrison replied. “I brought him some food last night before I went to sleep.”

“How did he seem to you?” Karpov asked him. “What was his state of mind?”

“As well as could be expected.” He replied. “He was a little more like his old self. He acknowledged and repented what he had done, but he still seemed a little out of it still, as if he was dazed.”

“We were continuing to administer sedatives and antidepressants.” Natalya reminded him.

“He was definitely improving though.” Morrison added, turning back to Karpov. “He didn’t seem suicidal if that’s what you’re implying.”

“He did tell me that he was racked with guilt for what he had done.” I mentioned, remembering our conversation when we had been trapped in the Kibo module. “Though he also talked about redeeming himself in our eyes. Strange then, that he’d take his own life.”

“Perhaps he decided his deeds were beyond redemption.” Aki suggested.

“Perhaps he thought that he could make amends by sacrificing himself.” Natalya said quietly. “After all, there’s one less person now to remain behind and our supplies will last a little longer.”

“He loved his wife and daughter deeply.” Morrison said. “Perhaps it was the loss of his family that had driven him to suicide.”

“Whatever the reason.” Natalya said. “I can’t help but feel that we failed him, letting him get to the point where he would take his own life. Perhaps we should have all been a little more supportive.”

“He tried to rape you!” I reminded her incredulously.

“I haven’t forgotten!” she snapped at me. “I’m just saying that he wasn’t well. He wasn’t himself when he did that.”

“Enough!” Karpov growled, putting his hand up. “Flynn is dead and that is that. The self-recriminations can wait.” I slowly nodded, though something just didn’t sit right to my mind. Flynn’s intentions, though terrible, had ultimately been little more than that. He had been stopped before he could carry out his despicable acts. He had attacked Karpov, but he hadn’t killed him. He had assaulted Natalya, but had been prevented from actually raping her. However much guilt he felt, surely he couldn’t have believed himself past the point of redemption.

“Just doesn’t make sense.” Morrison murmured, shaking his head.

“It is unlikely we will ever know for sure why he took his own life.” Karpov said. “Despite what he did, Flynn was still a member of our crew and this is a tragedy.” He reached for a handhold and pulled himself up before turning to leave. “I will retire to write my report on the incident.”