Highland Queen

Chapter 41

The woman turned her horse and led me into the forest. She clicked at her steed. The beast picked up his pace, the horse I was riding following along. We rode through the forest at a brisk pace. As we went, I eyed the trees. Soon, a pattern emerged: nine ash, nine oak, and ahead of me, I spotted the first thorn tree.

Guiding her mount, the girl led us to a river. She clicked at her horse and soon, we forged our way across. I pulled up my feet and held on as we moved through the deepest part. Once we had crossed, she drove us toward a thick patch of woods.

My raven’s eyes had not yet left me. Ahead, the trees glowed silver. Two tall monoliths stood sentinel at the entrance to the old forest. The woman guided her mount, and we rode through the stones. The air shivered. On the other side of the rocks, situated within a ring of massive old oaks, was a small village with nine houses.

At the center fire, a woman with long black hair waited. Eight other women, all of whom were robed in green, stood behind her.

“All hail,” the woman with long, black hair called. “Hail the Dark Lady. Our queen has come.”

The girl who’d brought me slipped off her horse then took my reins so I could dismount.

I climbed down and went to the leader of the coven. “Mother,” I said, inclining my head to her.

“Welcome, Dark Lady, to Birnam Grove,” she said. “I am Diana, leader of this coven.”

“I am pleased to meet you.”

“Come,” she said, motioning for me to follow her. She led me to her home, a dome-shaped building made of stone and earth. Once we were inside, she motioned for me to sit by the center fire. She poured me a goblet of amber-colored liquid then sat on a stool across from me.

“Amongst our people, you are called Cerridwen.”

I nodded. “Yes.”

The woman nodded thoughtfully. I studied her. Her eyes were lined with coal, and like Banquo, she had tattoos on her arms and brow. “I am glad you have come.”

“I spoke with Balor in the autumn,” I told her. “I want to help people of our faith. I have begun drafting grants of land, so the covens are protected by the crown. And I—”

“I am not interested in such matters,” she told me.

“Then why have you brought me here?”

“Because I was told to do so. Take my hand,” she said, reaching across the fire to me.

I watched as the flames surrounded her arm, her gown, but they did not burn her.

She eyed my gloved hand but said nothing. I placed my hand in hers.

When I did so, I felt a sharp jolt. The world around me trembled.

I opened my eyes to find myself somewhere familiar.

I was in Epona’s cabin. Before me, Epona lay on her bed. Crearwy sat beside her, holding her hand. Uald sat on a chair at Epona’s bedside.

Crearwy shivered then she turned and looked at me.

“Mother,” she said with a gasp.

Uald rose. “Cerridwen.”

Diana had cast us to the coven.

“Epona,” I said. I reached out to touch her, but in my phantom form, I could not.

Epona was so pale and shrunken. She opened her eyes just a little and looked at me.

“Cerridwen?”

“Epona, I’m here.”

Epona looked behind me. “Hail, Diana,” she rasped.

“Hail, Great Epona. May the Horse Mother guide your passage into the great beyond.”

“Thank you, sister,” she said then looked back at me. “Cerridwen,” Epona whispered, motioning for me to come close.

I leaned in.

“Cerridwen, I wanted to tell you… I wanted to tell you that I’m sorry. I took from you—”

“You did what you thought was right.”

“No. No. I took from you,” she whispered. “I had no right.”

“Your actions were guided,” I said, casting a glance at Crearwy who was listening intently.

“It was wrong. For you. For her. I am sorry,” Epona said, a tear slipping down her wrinkled cheek.

I choked back a sob. “No, Epona. Please. You have my forgiveness. Please. You were so good to me, like a mother. You did your best. You gave me so much.”

“But I took…” she said then turned to Crearwy. “Forgive your mother. Forgive her. It was me. It was Andraste and me.”

“Epona,” Crearwy said, her voice cracking. She kissed Epona’s hand.

“Forgive your mother,” Epona pleaded of Crearwy once more.

Crearwy looked at me, her face wet with tears. She nodded. “I forgive her.”

“Cerridwen,” Epona whispered. “When the time comes, listen to your heart.”

Epona turned to Uald. She smiled at her old friend.

Uald choked back a sob.

Epona patted Uald’s arm.

She turned and looked at all of us once more, then she closed her eyes. Epona exhaled heavily then became very still.

“Epona?” Crearwy whispered.

Epona didn’t answer.

Uald rose. She rushed past us and out of the house. I heard the front door slam behind her. A few minutes later, I felt others approach. I turned to see Aridmis, Druanne, Juno, Tully, and Flidas standing there.

No Sid.

Flidas looked from Epona to Diana.

“Mother,” she whispered.

Diana bowed her head to the girl the turned to me. “Cerridwen, we must go,” Diana told me.

I looked back at my daughter. “Crearwy?”

She looked up at me. “I love you, Mother.”

“I love you too. Goodbye,” I whispered.

As Diana and I withdrew, I reached out into that strange expanse of space where all the worlds touched and screamed, “Sid!”

My body rocked when we returned to the forest coven in Birnam. I tumbled from my stool. It took me a moment to regain my footing.

Diana rocked, her eyes closed. She clapped her hands together then pressed her fingers against her lips.

I fidgeted, unsure what to do with myself.

I was crying. My whole body tense, I wanted to do something, anything. But there was nothing to be done.

“Breathe, Cerridwen. Breathe.”

Setting my hand on my stomach, I inhaled slow and deep over and over again. Tears streamed down my cheeks. I yanked off my gloves and brushed the tears away.

I looked back at Diana who was staring at my hands.

I gazed down to see they were still covered in blood.

I sobbed.

Then, I felt it. There was a strange buzz at the back of my neck. My hands trembled.

No. Not now. Not here.

I had not had a fit in many years, and I could not have one now, here, amongst strangers—even if this was a sacred space.

I closed my eyes and breathed deeply, calming the tremors that wanted to insist themselves upon me.

“No,” I whispered. “No.”

Eyes closed, I pulled my gloves back on and mastered myself. Once I was steady, the shaking beaten back, I sat once more.

“How did you know?” I asked Diana.

“The moon told me,” she whispered. “I am sorry to meet you at such an auspicious time, but I was guided to bring you here, so you could be with her at her last moments.”

I choked back a sob then nodded.

“I will have Arden take you back now. But you and yours are welcome here. Just listen to the trees; they will guide you. In Birnam, whenever the woods speak, listen. They always know what must be done,” she said then rose.

We exited the little earthen house once more. I looked around. The place was not unlike Epona’s coven, though it was smaller and more rudimentary. Like the caves below Dunsinane, it was an ancient place.

I bowed to the women collected there then mounted the horse I had rode in on.

“Be well, Dark Lady,” Diana called to me then motioned to the others. “Come, daughters. Tonight, we shall pray for the spirit of a great lady who has passed.”

“Coming?” the girl Diana had called Arden called to me.

I turned the horse and followed along behind her.

As we rode, I tried to wrap my head around what I had seen.

Epona was gone.

May the Great Mother help us all.

Epona was gone.

Arden and I took the road that led to Dunsinane. When the castle’s torchlight was in sight, I dismounted and handed the horse’s reins to her.

“I will walk the rest of the way. It will make for a good joke,” I said absently, my heart not in it.

The girl nodded.

“Arden, isn’t it?”

“Yes.”

“If you should need anything, please don’t hesitate to come to Dunsinane.”

“And if you ever need anything, don’t forget where we are. Just whisper to the trees,” she said then gave me a soft, sympathetic smile. “Be safe, Your Majesty,” she said then turned and rode back into the night.

I sighed then looked up at the castle, a terrible feeling of loss eating a hole in my heart.

Epona’s words replayed again and again through my head.

I closed my eyes. “Epona, go with my love,” I whispered. “I shall see you in the next life. Blessed may you be.”