Highland Blood

Chapter 3

Madelaine embraced me the moment she entered Epona’s house the following morning. Her crushing hug was nearly more than I could take. My body still felt so hollow. I felt like a ghost, a spirit moving through the tangible world. It was an odd feeling. I tried to shake the thought and focus on my beloved aunt. She looked older. The hair at her temples had turned gray. How much time had passed?

“I’m so glad you made it here so quickly. We thought it would take you much longer,” she said.

“Yes, well, I was pushed out immediately,” I replied. Pushed into darkness and damnation. Was I pushed fast so I would not miss my fate? Had Andraste known? When I saw her next, she would have a lot of explaining to do.

“A week’s wait doesn’t feel immediate to your impatient aunt.”

“A week?”

Madelaine nodded.

Uald entered the house behind her. “So, she returns from the void.”

I mustered up the best smile I could.

“Sit, sit,” Madelaine said, motioning me toward the table. “You look pale, Corbie. Has she eaten, Epona?”

“Yes,” Epona said distractedly as she rummaged about in her pantry.

I’d stayed the night with Epona in a kind of stupid slumber, half awake and half in the otherworld. It was so hard to collect myself. I felt like I was drunk, lost in the shadows, a fey and broken thing.

“How are you, my little love? You don’t look like you feel well,” Madelaine said.

“The walk between the worlds is grueling,” Epona answered for me.

Madelaine smiled. “I’ve missed you so much.” She took my hands. I winced when she touched the bandaged cut on my palm. “Oh, you’re hurt?”

In so many ways. “I fell.”

Madelaine nodded.

Uald, who’d taken a seat alongside me, was studying both me and Epona carefully. Madelaine was delighted to see me and that joy blinded her. Uald, however, gave me a questioning look.

I shook my head and looked away. Not now.

“Your betrothed waits for you at my castle. He has come with a full entourage to see you. You will be taken north to Moray where you will be wed. He is older than you, in his late thirties, I believe. He’s tall and muscularly built. He has light brown hair and dark eyes. All in all, he is rather handsome.”

I frowned. In all this puzzling madness, I had assumed that Gillacoemgain of Moray would be my raven-haired man. In the very least, that would have made sense. But he wasn’t. And he wasn’t Banquo. What in the world was I to do?

“Who cares what he looks like? All of Scotland knows he’s a dangerous and bloody man,” Uald said.

Madelaine frowned. “Yes, there was bloodshed. That is true,” Madelaine said then turned to me. “Gillacoemgain killed his brother Findelach in civil war.”

“Donalda’s husband?” I asked then, remembering the story. Malcolm’s younger daughter Donalda had been married to Findelach, the Lord of Moray. Findelach had fallen out of King Malcolm’s favor and many whispered that the king supported Gillacoemgain’s move to wrestle power from Findelach.

Madelaine nodded. “The same.”

“Has Findelach no sons?” Uald asked.

“One, Macbeth, who sought protection from Lord Thorfinn of Orkney when his father was murdered.”

“I’m sure that went over well,” Uald said with a laugh. It was well known that Thorfinn of Orkney opposed Malcolm and wanted to rule the north of Scotland himself. With a powerful ally like Macbeth, who was an heir to Moray, the two would be a strong opposing force, one that Banquo had once told me he supported.

Madelaine nodded. “Indeed, until Macbeth was captured and handed over to his grandfather. He’s now a ward in Malcolm’s court.”

“A prisoner, you mean,” Uald said.

Madelaine shrugged. “Either way, he is subdued. Your marriage to Gillacoemgain will give you rule over the ancient kingdoms. It is a great honor.”

“Easy for you to say. No one seems to care that I am already bound to the heir of Lochaber,” I said angrily. My own rage startled me. My heart pounded in my chest.

Madelaine shifted in her seat. “I swear by the Great Mother, I did try.”

“We thought we heard a raven’s caw,” Sid said then, pushing the door open. When she entered, she immediately sensed the tension in the room. “Ah, so I see you’ve told her the good news.”

In spite of myself, I chuckled.

Sid flopped down into the seat beside me and put her arm around me. “Gillacoemgain of Moray, the fratricide. Excellent choice, Madelaine,” she told my aunt then turned to me. “Well, Raven Beak, there’s always the next life for love.”

Madelaine opened her mouth to protest but then closed it, thinking better of it.

“Cerridwen?” another voice called from the door. I turned to see Aridmis there.

“Sister.”

“Many welcome returns,” she said, smiling at me. “The stars told me you were coming soon.”

“Do they have anything else to say?” I asked sourly.

“Much, actually,” Aridmis said knowingly.

“I’m weary of the future,” I said, suddenly feeling very tired.

Aridmis poured a glass a water and lifted it, “then let’s toast the past.”

I smiled wryly at her, lifting my cup.

She smiled sympathetically at me, nodding in assent.

Druanne and Bride then entered. They’d been discussing something heatedly.

“You don’t always have to be right,” Bride was telling Druanne.

“I’m not saying—” Druanne began but Bride cut her off when she saw me.

“Merry met! It’s Cerridwen!”

Druanne looked sharply at me, plastering on a false smile. She nodded to me then busied herself helping Epona.

“You don’t look a day older,” Bride told me.

“Yet feel the weight of a thousand years on me,” I said absently.

Bride laughed, “Pshaw, so complain the young when they don’t know better. Just wait until you’re so old that you don’t recognize yourself in the looking glass anymore.”

The company in the room fell into cheery laughter. The conversation regarding Gillacoemgain of Moray was put on hold, and with Druanne there, I did my best to put my troubles out of mind. The last thing I wanted was for her to know what had happened. I was still coming to grips with it myself and didn’t want her poking at my wounds. But with the others came noise. And while having those I loved near me made me feel comforted, the loud sounds started clanging on my nerves.

“I know someone else who has missed you,” Uald said. “Why don’t we go check on Kelpie?”

Grateful for her intervention, I followed Uald outside. The bright sunlight hurt my eyes.

“I’ve had some luck breeding. We managed one colt, but no more. I need to bring in a fresh mare. Unfortunately, I’ll be losing my stallion now.”

“I’ll have horses sent to you. Madelaine can bring them when she comes next.”

Uald laughed. “Spending the wealth of Moray already?”

“What else will I have to do in Moray, wed to a man I do not love?”

Uald leaned against the fence. “Banquo…he came, you know, searching for you. Epona led him to believe you would not return.”

“So she confessed.”

“Epona doesn’t know that I told him you would return. But I did warn him that marriage was out of the question.”

“Uald,” I whispered. “Where is he?”

“North, with Lord Thorfinn. At the moment, he is allied with your promised husband’s enemies.”

“What should I do?”

“Well, if you ask me, I say you should run off and tell Malcolm to go to hell. You and your druid don’t need the court life.”

“You tempt my heart.”

Uald whistled, capturing Kelpie’s attention. My horse sniffed the wind then trotted over to me. Kelpie stuffed his nostrils in my hair and breathed deeply.

“I missed you too,” I whispered, stroking his neck. I turned back to Uald. “I don’t know what to do.”

“It’s your choice. If you return to court, return as Boite’s daughter and wield your bloodline like a weapon. But never let Cerridwen sink below your skin. Be a raven amongst doves.”

It was then I noticed a young horse moving across the field toward us. “Who is that?” I asked.

“The offspring I told you about. I named him Titan.”

“He’s enormous.”

The horse stopped in front of Uald who scratched his ears. “He’s no bigger than he should be.” Uald looked at me and then frowned. “It is the same with Sid. Corbie, you’ve been gone a long time.”

“Long? How long?”

“Six years.”

“Six years!” Six years was too much. No one could wait that long. Banquo would have given up on me already. I closed my eyes and shook my head. As I did so, I felt a sharp pain shoot across my skull. I stepped away from the fence. My knees grew soft.

“Cerridwen,” Uald said, catching me before I fell.

“It’s too much,” I whispered.

“Come,” Uald said, leading me to her smithy. “I made something for you.”

Once inside, I sat down at the table and held my head in my hands while Uald dug through her trunk. A few moments later, she set a package in front of me.

“Go ahead,” she told me.

Trying to ignore the pain, I slowly unwrapped the bundle. Inside, I found a glimmering sword topped with a raven’s head. It was the most beautiful weapon I’d ever seen.

I gasped. “Did you make this?”

“In many ways, you are the daughter I never had. Take this sword, and wield it as the raven.”

I rose and lifted the blade. My sword arms were weaker than they had been before I’d gone to Ynes Verleath, but I was still strong. Bracing myself, I swished the blade back and forth. Before my eyes, I imagined Duncan’s monstrous face. I envisioned taking his head off. But it didn’t feel like enough. It didn’t feel violent enough. I wanted more blood. I heard my heart beating hard, and in the distance, I perceived the sound of raven’s wings.

“Uald, daughter of Hephaestus,” Madelaine called from behind me. “Isn’t it beautiful? Don’t you just love it?”

I turned and looked at Madelaine.

The expression on Madelaine’s face changed. She looked startled. “Corbie?”

“It is the raven you see,” Uald told her. “Don’t be afraid.”

I lowered the sword, and the sound of wings dissipated. My heartbeat slowed.

“It’s beautiful,” I told Uald.

“I…I was thinking we should get ready to go. Tavis is waiting. It’s been a week. I don’t want to keep Moray waiting longer. They…they think I’ve traveled to the convent for you,” Madelaine said, obviously upset. I wondered then how I looked when the raven took over me.

I lifted the belted scabbard off the table and wrapped it around my waist. Sliding the sword inside, I crossed the smithy and embraced Uald.

“Thank you,” I whispered in her ear. “For everything.”

“If you need anything, we are always here for you.”

I nodded then turned to Madelaine.

“I’ll need to say goodbye to Sid,” I told her.

Madelaine nodded. “She went back to her house. I’ll let Epona know we are planning to leave.”

“I’ll get Kelpie ready. I’m sure he’ll be keen to ride.”

“Thank you, Uald,” I said, setting my hand on her shoulder.

I turned then and crossed the square to Sid’s little house. I knocked lightly on the door.

“Come,” she called. She was already packing up my old things. “We stored your belongings here,” Sid said. “I looked after them.”

I nodded then sat down on Sid’s bed. I gently touched the hem of one of my old dresses. So much life had passed. Six years. How had that happened? I sighed heavily.

“That sigh says a lot of things,” Sid commented. “I’d sigh too if I had to get married.”

“And to the wrong man, nonetheless.”

“You are lucky to have so many to choose from.”

“Am I? Soon I’ll be in Moray counting bricks on the wall.”

“You will be in charge of the women. You can force them to like you.”

“Am I so awful that I need to force people to like me?”

“Yes, but at least you will have the power to do so.”

I smiled. “Be careful or I may just force you to come with me.”

“If only I could. The wrong man, eh?”

“Wrong man. Wrong title. Wrong lands. Wrong, wrong, wrong. So much is wrong here, Sid.”

“One man is as good as another.”

“You don’t really believe that.”

“The only difference from one man to the other is the color of his hair.”

“You have a poor opinion of men.”

Sid stilled then turned and looked at me. “Shouldn’t you?”

I stared at her. Did she know?

“Nadia,” Sid said gently. “The fey saw.”

I felt like someone had wrapped their hands around my throat. Terrible shame swept over me, but then that shame turned to anger. Why should I feel disgraced because of the evil in others? “The fey should not gossip other’s sorrows.”

“It was not gossip. They were afraid for you. They have foreseen…life springing forth in you.”

“Yes.”

“What are you going to do?”

“Take my new husband to bed as soon as I can force myself to do so, give the innocent flowers growing inside me a respectable family name, then avenge myself when the time comes.”

“I have taken that offense more times than I care to say.”

“He will pay.”

“May the Morrigu let it be so,” Sid said then smiled at me. “You will be a mother.”

I nodded as I studied my friend. I remembered what Epona had told me when I first came to the coven, that Sid had a child that lived amongst the fey…or so Epona believed. And worse still, I remember what Epona had said about the child Sid had killed in her madness after being sexually violated. “Sid…” I began, but I didn’t know what to say.

She exhaled deeply then shook her head. “You are stronger than I am. You will be fine.”

“What of your child?” I asked her. “Does your second child live?”

She nodded. “My sweet boy. He’s nearly ten now and more fey than human,” she said then shrugged. “Even in the unexpected, we can find blessings.” She handed me my bag. I heaved it over my shoulder, and we turned and went outside.

Thora ran across the square and joined me.

Madelaine, Epona, and Uald were waiting with the horses, which were already saddled.

Aridmis crossed the coven square and took my hand. “All seems dark now,” she told me, “but the clouds will pass. I’ve seen it in the stars.”

“Thank you, dear sister,” I told her.

Bride, too, waited for me. She handed me a bundle. “Honey cakes. It is a long ride to Moray.”

I kissed her on both cheeks. “Thank you, Mother.”

“I hope I will see you again in this life. If not, I’ll find you in the next,” Bride told me.

I inclined my head to her.

Druanne, who looked like she was smothering her jealousy, nodded to me. “Farewell, Gruoch.”

“Druanne,” I replied stiffly then turned from her to look once more at Sid.

“Don’t leave me alone. Please come and see me,” I told her.

Sid nodded. “I will. Don’t worry. We’ll be together again. All of us.” She pulled me into an embrace.

I felt tears threaten, but I choked them back.

I let her go then and went to Kelpie.

Uald helped me mount my horse. “Farewell,” she told me. “May she ever keep you safe,” she added, patting the scabbard.

“Thank you, Uald.”

She nodded.

Once I was mounted, Epona came to me. “Remember your promise?”

“I remember.”

“Fair travels,” she said then let me go. “May the Mother Goddess watch over you.”

“And you.”

I smiled at Sid once more then tapped on the reins. Kelpie turned and we followed Madelaine out of the coven. I was leaving to wed, not Banquo, not my raven-haired man, but a complete stranger.