Empower

Chapter 37

‘Neither shall they say see here or see there, for behold, the kingdom of God is within you.’

Luke 17:20

When I opened my eyes, I was cradled in Lincoln’s arms while he shielded me from the wind and torrential rain.

His eyes were fixed on mine.

‘Did it work?’ I gasped.

He nodded in awe. ‘They’re all down.’

‘Phoenix?’ I asked, my voice breaking. But, really, I already knew.

‘Phoenix too,’ Lincoln said.

I stumbled to my feet, despite Lincoln’s attempts to stop me, and faced the storm.

‘Michael!’ I screamed at the top of my lungs. ‘Michael!’ My hands fisted at my sides.

‘Over there,’ Lincoln said in my ear, pointing me to the corner of the rooftop.

A lion stood proudly at the edge, his front paws mounted on the surrounding wall – the wind neither a deterrent nor bother. And with one almighty roar that sounded and felt like thunder, the rain stopped and the hurricane pulled into a gentle tornado and travelled back out to sea.

Cheers sounded out from the rooftop and below, but only tears fell from my eyes as I watched my lion walk over to where Phoenix lay.

My lion – my angel maker, Michael – gently leaned over Phoenix and nudged his face, giving him a small nurturing lick, as a lion would his cub. And with a final look back at me, his eyes as blank as ever, he took off, bounding in great and mighty leaps all the way to the edge of the rooftop and beyond as Grigori watched in wonder.

‘Vi, you’re bleeding,’ Lincoln said, sounding worried.

My hand went to my face and I looked down to see the streaks of blood that my eyes, nose and mouth had left behind. My power was gone. I couldn’t feel it at all. I couldn’t feel the senses. I couldn’t feel the lure of my Sight. The well that sat deep at the base of me was empty. And still, none of it mattered as I staggered over to Phoenix, collapsing at his side.

My hand trembled as it ran over his face.

‘I’m sorry! I’m so, so sorry,’ I cried.

Slowly, his dark brown eyes opened and lifted to meet mine. He stared at me for what was probably just seconds but felt like a brief lifetime. And in his eyes I found everything I needed at that moment. Acceptance. Forgiveness. Relief. And … humanity. I had killed him. Not today. Perhaps not for many tomorrows. But immortality was his no more.

No longer a malign angel.

No longer a dark exile.

Phoenix was human.

Just like every other exile in the nearby radius.

And yet, in those final seconds before the world around me went black, I saw something new in his eyes. Something that looked an awful lot like hope.

It hurt. Everywhere.

I’d moved in and out of consciousness for what seemed like a very long time; opening my eyes, seeing Lincoln, feeling his closeness and then slipping back under all too soon.

I could hear chatter here and there.

‘She might not make it—’

‘Yes, she will.’

‘I’m just saying you should be prepared.’

‘No need … Get this joker out of here.’

And then, later …

‘We should consider moving her.’

‘Is it safe?’

‘We can’t know, but it has to be better than keeping her here.’

‘Get a plane ready.’

And then, moving. Lying in a bed and then being cradled in the arms of the sun. Warm. Loved. Safe. I sunk in.

People came and went. Again I heard them talk. Sometimes I even knew who they were.

Griffin sat with me often. I thought I heard him cry. But then he got on with it, letting me know that he was looking after things. That the clean-up was well in hand. All the exiles in the city of New Orleans had fallen. My range hadn’t been much more than a dozen city blocks but since they’d all been in that area for the battle, it had worked a charm.

The Grigori had started to detain the now-powerless exiles immediately, with assistance from the navy. A number of the exiles had taken their own lives before they could be stopped and many had fled but were being pursued.

Griffin marvelled at how the events of that night had changed the face of the fight. There were still many exiles out there to fight and the guarantee of more to come, but the playing field had been significantly evened.

All the while Lincoln stayed by my side.

I wanted to open my eyes and tell them I would be okay. But I couldn’t. The darkness held me even while light surrounded me.

Eventually, I became aware of loud noises. Then I heard a familiar voice.

‘Honestly, you’d think they’d give a guy a break. It’s like fricking Fort Knox getting in here.’

‘Yeah, a few of the Rogues have taken it upon themselves to add a little extra security.’

‘A little!’ he scoffed. ‘I almost peed myself.’

I heard Lincoln chuckle. ‘It’s good to see you.’

‘Yeah, well, I got sick of waiting for you to come and visit me.’

‘Sorry, Spence.’

Spence.

‘No sweat. I would’ve been here sooner but Mia and Chloe are worse than the pit bulls guarding this room.’ I heard his voice change, soften. ‘How’s she doing?’

I heard Lincoln sigh. ‘I can’t feel her like I usually do. She’s weak but she’s holding on. I try to help the healing along but it’s like something is blocking me.’

‘Maybe she just isn’t ready,’ Spence said simply. I felt a hand at my forehead. ‘Is it terrible that there’s a part of me that wishes we’d never figured it all out? That we’d been somewhere on the other side of the world when that war had gone down and the angels had just dealt with it like they were going to.’

‘No. I’ve had that thought myself. Doesn’t mean we’d change things, though.’

There was a pause before Lincoln added, ‘What you did … Drenson. How are you dealing with it?’

I could almost hear Spence’s shrug. ‘Not like I look back on it with regret, if that’s what you mean. It was him or her, which meant there was no other option. And it helps that no one locked me up.’

‘I agree.’ Another pause, and then, ‘But?’

Spence sighed. ‘Yeah. Just wish he hadn’t been such a dick, I suppose.’

‘Yeah. Me too.’

‘So, what happens if she wakes up?’

‘When,’ Lincoln corrected.

‘When,’ Spence confirmed.

‘That’s up to her.’

‘What if she wants to go back to London? Stay with the Rogues?’

‘Then that’s what we’ll do.’

I waited for Spence to make some kind of barbed comment, but none came. Instead, he just said, ‘Fair enough, man. I hope you two get your chance at happiness. You deserve it. Call me if there’s any change.’

‘You got it.’

Time passed from there. I could hear machines beep. And more people as they came and went. Steph was a constant. She talked about her wedding and deliberated over candles or lanterns, sit-down dinner or cocktail-party receptions, honeymoon locations and music until I would sense her slump beside me, and sob as she begged me to wake up.

Dapper read books to me. Ancient tales intended for few to hear. Onyx came with him, throwing in his own biased recollections of particular events. And all the while I lay still, wishing I could heal myself, but my power remained dormant. Or gone.

I heard Phoenix come and go. Unlike the others he didn’t speak to me, but when he was there he always held my hand.

‘I know you still love her,’ Lincoln said, his tone matter-of-fact.

‘I’ll always love her. But she has always and will always love you. I won’t ever stand in your way again.’

‘That might be wise since you’re significantly easier to hurt nowadays.’

I felt their smiles.

‘What are you going to do now?’ Lincoln went on.

‘Wait for her to open her eyes and say the words we all need to hear her say.’

The darkness pulled me under after that.

Finally, dreams started to flit into the darkness. Growing up with Dad. Silly moments, such as making him a Father’s Day painting and breakfast in bed only to realise when I snuck into his room that he’d already left for work. And other things; the look of desperation on his face when he’d come to collect me from the hospital after a teacher had attacked and very nearly raped me. I’d never seen how badly that broke him at the time, but watching it now I saw the love, and the agony of not knowing what to do or how to help.

I dreamed of my first day at a new school after the court case and meeting Steph. She was like a blast of fresh air and I knew from day one I had a friend for life.

Then there was the first time I met Lincoln. The self-defence course that delivered me my very own guardian angel. He watched over me, and in my dream I saw in a new light how he cared, how he worried. I saw our friendship grow and the conflict in his eyes when it became so much more and his care turned to torment.

I dreamed of the night he first kissed me, feeling once again the overwhelming passion and sureness that this man was my other half; that we were absolutely meant for one another. How right I’d been.

And then suddenly I was outside his warehouse discovering the truth, feeling the sting of betrayal. But this time, I saw so much more. I saw his pain and fears for me and us. I saw my innocence drift away and my rage and I wished, not for the first time, that I’d found it in my heart to be more forgiving, and yet I knew that the path had been the one I’d had to travel to reach this day of understanding.

The dreams kept coming. Life and death, and love and loss. All painful and beautiful. All real.

I felt Lincoln’s hand, warm and wrapped around mine.

‘Come back to me, baby. Please come back to me.’

This time when I tried, my eyes cracked open and I saw him beside me, ruffled and beautiful.

‘I never left,’ I whispered. My throat was dry and my body ached all over.

Lincoln jolted then looked at me, his entire body sagging in relief.

‘Hey,’ he rasped, his fingers trailing along the curve of my chin.

‘Hey.’ I tried – and failed – to smile. ‘Where?’ I croaked.

‘We’re back in New York. We moved you here about a week ago.’

‘How long?’

‘Two weeks since the hurricane.’

I nodded. ‘New Orleans?’

He smiled, going along with my two-word vocab. ‘The city was saved. The outer areas closer to the ocean are gone but the navy managed to evacuate many people. Lives and homes were lost, but nothing near what would’ve …’

Then I felt something. It wasn’t my power but it was powerful. ‘Someone’s here,’ I whispered.

Lincoln looked around, shaking his head. ‘Just us.’

‘No,’ I replied, waiting. Sure enough, a few moments later I could see him. Michael.

‘Am I dying?’ I asked.

Lincoln immediately moved to stand between Michael and me.

Michael raised his hands gently. ‘I have come to take you both somewhere, but rest assured you will be returned.’

‘Can’t this wait?’ asked Lincoln. ‘She’s only just woken up. The doctors haven’t even seen her yet.’

‘Do you fear she may suffer a medical emergency while under my care?’ Michael asked.

Wow. Did he just crack a joke?

I smiled weakly, reaching up to take Lincoln’s hand. ‘As long as we’re together,’ I said.

Michael nodded. ‘I would not dream of anything other,’ he said, and suddenly the pain was gone from my body and Lincoln and I were in the place that I could only call … other, standing in a field facing Michael. But not just any field.

A field of white lilies beneath a violet sky and a glowing golden sun.

It was warm, like home. Like love.

‘My painting,’ I whispered.

‘Your heart,’ Michael corrected.

And I agreed.

Lincoln held my hands in both of his, looking at the field with a sense of contentment and understanding.

‘Your souls are bound in every way?’ Michael asked Lincoln.

Lincoln turned to him and nodded. ‘Every way.’

Uri and Nox appeared behind Michael. They were wearing their usual contrast in clothing and yet they seemed more relaxed than usual, closer together rather than so far apart.

‘You have finally surrendered?’ Uri asked.

I nodded. ‘My self.’

Uri bowed his head.

Michael took a step towards us. ‘We would offer you a final binding, if you choose to accept.’

‘I think we are already quite final, Michael,’ Lincoln said.

‘That is true, but symbolism has its place, too. It comes after but still carries weight. Join your left hands.’

Lincoln and I did as Michael asked, not sure what was going on but trusting that it was right.

A light pressure began to build and then something akin to an electrical current ran through our hands causing us both to flinch. When I looked down I saw a new marking. Intricate, like the designs on my wrist markings, again with tiny wisps like feathers, but so much finer. A ring on my wedding finger, and another on Lincoln’s. Matching in design, but whereas mine was purple with a shimmer like stars in the night, Lincoln’s was silver, just like my wrists.

We looked to Michael, who seemed pleased with the result.

‘In Hebrew,’ he said, ‘amethyst means dream stone.’

Michael, commander of all armies, the greatest of the Sole angels, bowed. ‘May your dreams be many.’

Lincoln bowed his head in return. ‘Thank you.’

‘Will I ever see you again?’ I asked.

‘If you need me, yes.’ He tilted his head in that way of his. ‘So, it is unlikely. You know who you are and what you can do.’

I smiled. ‘I am you. Like you are me.’

Michael nodded once. ‘We do not run. We do not quit.’

My smile widened. ‘And what of fairytales?’

He raised his hands, palms up. ‘Life, child. Is life not the greatest fairytale of all?’

I nodded in understanding. ‘What about if you need me?’

His eyebrow twitched. ‘There is always that possibility.’

I rolled my eyes at his inability to admit he might just want to see me. I guess only time would tell, though I did realise one thing. ‘I can’t come back here, can I?’ I was a danger to them, and we could no longer deny it.

‘It is your space to command and it will not be taken from you, but no, it would not be wise.’

Somehow this space had become a part of me, and already I mourned its loss, but I knew that this was right, and what I wanted to do. It was the idea that had first come to me after facing Sammael and now it was time to make it happen.

‘It’s your space now,’ I said before I looked off into the distance and closed my eyes, smiling.

First, I returned it to its true form of nothingness, with its searching souls glimmering in the distance and countless smatterings of rainbows connecting what might be. Then I thought of my senses – the gifts that the angels had given me. Why had I been given all five? Why had that been necessary?

Perhaps … for this.

I breathed deeply and brought forward the conflicting sensations I’d always felt in my blood and bones. Rivers of cool; lands of warmth. I thought of the sounds of birds flying and trees blowing in the wind. I drew on the smell of flowers, in particular white lilies and all they invoked, and then the flashes of morning and evening. And finally, the taste of apple.

Slowly I opened my eyes. Before me was a vast meadow of rolling hills with a carpet of white flowers and trees in the distance, birds circling and swooping. The rainbows shone brightly, casting light, and in the centre … a tree bursting with ripe red apples.

Beyond my field there was still the great expanse of nothingness. I had not created a new world or even a new city, but it was a start.

I smirked, gesturing to the apples. ‘Feel free to help yourselves.’

‘You take great assumption by thinking this is something we would desire,’ Michael said flatly. ‘If we would desire anything.’

I nodded. ‘Rest your pride, Michael. Rest your pride and maybe we can all evolve.’ Maybe this could be a place where angels could indulge and experience time in a physical sense. Angels might be the higher beings but that didn’t mean they could not learn.