Wolf Games

Chapter 9

Maggie knocked on the door of the hotel room next to hers, her heart beating loud enough she was surprised they couldn’t already hear her standing outside. She didn’t really want to do this, but since she saw no alternative, she was going to put on her big-girl panties and force herself to have a good time. If she didn’t pass out first from nerves. Jared opened the door and whistled in appreciation.

“My oh my, you clean up nice.”

Maggie spun in a circle, the layers of her skirt floating around her. Now that she knew he was safe, Jared reminded her of nothing more dangerous than a golden retriever. “Why thank you, kind sir. Is the rest of my harem ready to escort me to the ball?”

He snorted and gestured her in. “TJ’s still in the shower and Erik disappeared thirty minutes ago, saying he needed to grab some stuff.”

Maggie sat in the overstuffed chair in the corner of the enormous suite. There was a wet bar behind her, a comfortable sofa facing a massive wall-mounted TV and an office studio off to the side. “I can’t believe they put us in a five-star hotel in Dawson City. I’ve never experienced the kind of luxury we’ve had for the past three days.”

Jared raised a brow. “What? Just ’cause we’re wolves doesn’t mean we don’t know how to behave in high society.” He straightened the collar of his white shirt and pulled on a suit jacket. Maggie admired the results. The boy was a walking advertisement for GQ, wolf style. “Damn, can you help me with this? I can never get it straight.”

She slapped his hands out of the way to work on his tie. “Staying here is just such a contrast. They start us out with a hike through the wilderness, throw us in the Yukon River and then plant us in Dawson to cool our heels? I mean I’ve loved the sightseeing and the sleeping in a real bed. And the food…oh my Lord, I’ve gained ten pounds.” She shrugged. “I thought they would make us head right away for the next challenge.”

He stepped back to check himself in the mirror. “Remember these Games are supposed to be like the wolf equivalent of the Olympics. Yeah, we all want to do our best, but there’s also the good-will-between-packs part. It’s a chance to show we can be together without starting territory wars like in the old days.”

Maggie collapsed back into the chair. “Jared…I’m going to confess. You guys from the Granite pack are not like any wolves I’ve met before.”

TJ leapt out of the bathroom, stark naked, dripping wet and singing into a hairbrush at the top of his lungs. Jared eyed him for a moment before turning to face Maggie, one brow lifted high. “You were saying?”

She burst out laughing. Jared joined her and the two of them gasped for air as TJ stood in the middle of the room, a confused expression on his face.

“What?”

The main door opened and Erik wandered in, checking out TJ as he paced around him. “Interesting attire. I take it you’re going for the super formal look.”

“Ha, ha.” TJ dragged a towel over his body and nodded at Erik in his jeans and T-shirt. “What’s with you? That’s not your usual black-tie outfit.”

“Nope.”

Maggie rose to examine Erik more closely. The past couple of days he’d been by her side all day long, taking her on tours, buying her trinkets at the souvenir shops. Guarding her when too many wolves crowded around. Then he would kiss her good night outside her hotel room and leave her. Leave her aching and wanting, and she was so ready to rip the clothes right off his gladiator-sized body here and now to sate the urges pulsing through her.

This mate thing was getting seriously out of control.

He winked. “I thought Maggie and I would skip the formal dinner. You two go as the representatives from Granite Lake.”

Relief flooded her, the tension headache at the back of her neck slipping away in one smooth stroke. “You mean it?”

He gestured to the basket he’d dropped on the coffee table. “I raided the kitchen. Private picnic for two sound good?”

She threw herself into his arms and buried her face in his neck. She breathed in deeply, his scent filling her head and calming her nerves.

“Thank you,” she whispered. He’d known. He’d understood she still couldn’t do the whole room full of strange wolves.

Someone cleared their throat and she realized she was not only clinging to Erik, she’d wrapped her legs around his waist and they were rather intimately pressed together. Not that she was embarrassed— wolves were pretty upfront about sex—but if she didn’t move soon, they’d be putting on a show, and she really wanted to be alone with him.

Erik lowered her carefully, brushing his knuckles against her cheek before taking her by the hand. “Boys, I expect you to be on your best behaviour. I don’t want to be called back to Diamond Tooth Gertie’s and find out you’ve been fighting.”

Jared winked. “Tonight, I’m a lover, not a fighter.” He turned to TJ. “Did you see the chick on the Norwegian Team? Arwhoo. I claim dibs on that one.”

Maggie held on tightly to Erik as he whisked her out of the room and down the ornately decorated hallway. “Are we going to get in trouble for not attending?”

He shook his head. “It’s an optional event. The guys will have a good time, there will be a lot of sex happening in the corners of the room, and one team will get thrown out for trying to start a rumble. The usual when you get a big gathering of wolves together.”

Oh Lord, now she was even happier she didn’t have to attend.

They walked quietly down the historic wooden boardwalk, Maggie pulling in long slow breaths of the fresh air. Above them the sky remained daylight bright.

Erik noticed her gazing upward. “We’ve traveled far enough north sunset won’t happen until just after midnight.”

She nodded. “I’ve missed this part of the North. Before we moved away from Whitehorse I used to love staying up late and going for runs…”

Her throat choked tight and he squeezed her fingers. He led her into the trees and up a narrow path. By the time they broke out above the city, she could breathe again. She stood looking down at the narrow streets nestled against the Yukon River, the hills on the other side still showing their scars from the years of dredge mining. The massive machines had followed the hand miners, scooping up layers of rock and soil to shift out every bit of gold, leaving chunks of broken rubble in their wake.

That was her.

Scarred. Beaten, and pulled apart until there was nothing left of value. At least, that’s what she’d felt like before meeting Erik. She sighed. If only it was as easy as bulldozing the rocks aside and planting flowers to cover the scars on her heart.

Erik wrapped his arms around her from the back, pulling her against his warm body. “We need to deal with this tonight. I’m pretty sure the next challenge is going to involve us having to shift. We need to talk.”

Anger flared. “This is about me being able to shift? For the Games?” She would have torn herself from his grasp, but suddenly iron bands held her in place.

“Don’t. I know you’re scared, but don’t deliberately try to turn this into a fight to avoid talking to me. I’ve given you time and space. I just want what’s best for you and I don’t give a shit if you ever change into a wolf.”

He spun her around and clasped her chin, his dark eyes searching hers intently. “I refuse to stand by and let you face tomorrow unprepared. If I’m right, there will be dozens of wolves surrounding you. I won’t allow you to walk into that kind of a situation without me trying to take away a little of your fears. You’ve asked me to wait before joining with you and even though it’s been hell, I’ve waited. But don’t ask me to not be your mate, not protect you when I can. Because I won’t do it. My wolf won’t let me and neither will my human morals.”

She stared at him, her limbs trembling as she realized for the first time she was with someone stronger than her who she could really trust. The ache in her soul urged her on.

“You won’t tell Missy?”

He jerked back in surprise. “Doesn’t she know?”

She shook her head. “She knows parts, but…” Shame covered her. Her own sister had suffered because of Maggie’s weakness.

He spread out the blanket he’d brought, sat and pulled her into his lap. Resting her head against his chest, not looking into his eyes, made it easier to speak. She thought for a moment, then simply told her story.

“I don’t know why we moved away from Whitehorse. Mom and Dad died before I got a real answer out of them, but Missy and I always suspected it had something to do with our new Alpha in Whistler. He found out something he held over Dad’s head to make him move. Once we were in the pack at Whistler, there was no escape for any of us.”

She swallowed hard. “The summer I was seventeen, Missy turned twenty-one. Our Alpha wanted her to marry his brother. He was trying to gain control of her Omega skills, but we didn’t know it at the time. Missy only knew Jeff wasn’t her mate and she refused. So they…” She shivered and burrowed deeper into his arms as if his presence could protect her from the memories.

“They came after you?”

She nodded. “I ran. I hid as a human and when they found me, I shifted and ran again. There were six or seven of them and every time I shifted there was someone in that form to torment me. They hit me.” Her voice broke. “They hurt me.”

His body tightened under her, indignation and anger pouring off him and forming a protective wall around them. Nothing could touch her right now. He stroked her hair silently for a moment, his heart pounding under her ear.

“Did they rape you?” He spoke softly, gently.

“I don’t know!” She squirmed her way back to stare at him. “It sounds so stupid, but I really don’t remember. I can feel them grabbing me—my human body—and throwing me on the floor. I shifted, and then there were wolves on top of me, trying to mount me. I shifted back and they tore my skin.” She lifted her blouse and twisted to show him the scars along her lower back and her hips. “I shifted so many times in a short period of time I passed out, exhausted from the effort. The next thing I remember is being at home in bed, and Missy telling me she was engaged to Jeff. Dad had made promises to the Alpha and she was furious. I never said a word, but I know it was my fault she ended up in that marriage. Dad sold her off to save me.”

She thought she’d already wept all the tears possible over this. Thought the well had run dry and she had nothing left but a cold stone for a heart. But in Erik’s arms, his scent surrounding her, she found sorrows she’d never realized she still clung to. Great racking sobs shook her until she was gasping for air.

Erik rocked her, cradled her, his presence embracing her even closer than his arms. He poured love over her, acceptance. His anger simmering underneath didn’t frighten her. It reassured her she would never, ever have to face a situation like that again.

When she could speak there was a quiver in her voice. “I left right afterward and never went back. I worked summers and attended UBC and I never shifted into a wolf. Missy and I kept in touch via email and phone, especially after Mom and Dad died in a car accident, but I refused to physically go back to Whistler. Every now and then I’d see pack members hanging around outside my classes, like they were keeping track of me.” She shuddered. “Once, they tried to get into the apartment I shared with Pam, but I told her they were cousins I didn’t want to see, and somehow she got rid of them.”

“I knew I liked her for a reason.”

She snorted, and wiped at her teary eyes. “Yeah, well, she thinks you’re a little freaky. You know, she’s about the best friend I’ve ever had. Brave and loyal, and fearless and fun, all at the same time. So often I wanted to tell her about being a wolf but I couldn’t. I couldn’t risk her leaving me.”

Erik handed her a hanky and she wiped her face clean. She settled back into his arms, his comfort healing her pain. They sat together for a long time, Erik rubbing her back and whispering foreign phrases to her. She had no idea what he was saying, but the words soothed her, eased the ragged edges around her heart.

“I can see why being around wolves frightens you. Not only was your Alpha a rotten bastard, the whole pack was diseased.”

Maggie ran a hand up his forearm to caress his biceps. Touching him made her feel so much better. “I’m surprised you’re not offering to go rip out their throats.”

“Oh, I’m thinking about it. But your brother-in-law, Tad, already killed the Alpha who instigated the whole thing. What I plan in retaliation for the others’ sins you don’t have to know about.”

She sat up quickly. “You’re not going after them.”

“They hurt you, you’re my mate. There will be an accounting.”

“I didn’t tell you this so you’d go off half-cocked killing people.”

Erik raised a brow. “Killing them. Okay, I had other things in mind, but now you mention it—”

“Stop it. It happened a long time ago. It’s been seven years.”

“Yet you’re still hurting. Sounds like I have cause to give them pain.”

She opened her mouth to speak and then froze. Oh damn it. Damn, damn, damn.

He was right.

Maggie scrambled out of his lap and stared down at his dark eyes in horror. A light bulb went on in her head and she could clearly see herself in the room again, the wolves still attacking her. It was like she’d locked the door and never let them go.

She paced toward the nearby trees, grappling with the revelation. She’d suffered years of mental pain and confusion. Loneliness like only a pack animal separated from family could experience. Even the physical weakness caused by locking her wolf away—none of it had been necessary.

She turned to face him. Her gentle giant, staring back with love in his eyes, concern and anger warring in his heart. He’d seen clearly so many times in the past days exactly what she needed. Was it the mate connection that made him able to cut down the walls and help her break free?

Suddenly she knew part of what she needed.

Him.

Two steps forward returned her to where he sat. “This isn’t about them, it’s me.” He moved to speak and she held up her hand. “No, wait and listen. It’s true, I’m still in pain. I deliberately didn’t see any wolves for years. I didn’t visit with my sister in person, and I haven’t been able to shift to my wolf in forever. They stole a part of me away and I let them. Ah shit, I let them.”

“Maggie…no, don’t blame yourself. They were the ones who were wrong. You did nothing to deserve this.”

She shook her head. “Don’t you see? That’s what I’m saying, I felt like I did deserve it. It was my fault Missy was trapped, so I let my wolf become trapped as well in punishment. Oh hell, I’ve been so stupid.”

Erik closed his eyes and she felt the rush of his power flow over her. She gasped at the depth of it, the richness of the sensation soaking into her very pores. When he opened his eyes he held out his hand and she grabbed it like a lifeline. “Maggie, I don’t know what to say. My brilliant plan to show you my wolf and try to ease your fears seems trite and childish as a solution.

“I feel the strength inside you. Your wolf is powerful and she wants to help you through this. Your heart is so strong, but you’ve been using your strength to carry a burden that wasn’t yours. I meant what I said about not caring if you shift. Only I’d hate to see her trapped forever when together you can be happy again. Truly happy.”

“So if tomorrow is a wolf-only challenge, what would you do?”

He shrugged. “As far as I’m concerned we can go home. This is a game, what you’re talking about is real life.”

Maggie shook her head. “No! If we go home that’s another thing they’ve stolen from me. From the boys, and the pack. No more. I’ve had enough of them taking my life away. I want to compete and I want to get my life back on track.” Tears filled her eyes again. She dropped to her knees at his feet and clasped his big hands in hers. “Help me.”

Erik rubbed his thumb over her knuckles. “I agree you need to take back control of your life, but Maggie…” He cupped her face in his hand. “You’ve been reclaiming your life. Ever since you started back north you’ve taken charge and made changes. If you can’t finish it all in a few days, you’re still well on the way. They aren’t winning anymore. You’re the one in control of the game now. Okay?”

Her heart leapt. It was true. She nodded jerkily.

“Summer solstice is tomorrow. I think that should help.” He pulled off his shirt and her mouth watered. Firm muscles tempted her. Distracted her from the emotional rollercoaster she’d just raced over. The urgent desire to run her tongue over his body chased away all other thoughts. How had they resisted completing their mating until now? It was another stone to cast at the feet of her tormentors. Then he was naked, every glorious mile of him spread out like a banquet before her.

“I have no idea how this is supposed to help my wolf, but damn you’re fine.”

He laughed. “You’re drooling.”

She wiped at her mouth in response and flushed when he laughed again. “Tease.”

“I like the look in your eyes.”

Maggie lifted her gaze to his. “You’re much better looking than TJ. At least to me.”

Erik patted the blanket beside him. “I thought I’d change to my wolf, but I want you to be sure you understand it’s me, no matter what form I take. If I frighten you, just tell me to shift back and I will.”

“I’ve been around TJ’s wolf for three days.”

He frowned. “Sweetheart, I hate to remind you, but TJ is young and not as powerful as you. He’s also not nearly as big as I am. When we do have a shifter challenge there will be few wolves my size. If you can get comfortable around me, that’s the first step.”

Maggie nodded. “Makes sense.”

“Touch me.”

She ran her hands up his chest, over all that hard muscle and tight skin, leaning closer to brush their lips together. The thrill of connection shook her to the core even as their lips stayed soft and sweet. She took her time, tracing the tattoos on his shoulders and arms, brushing the stiff hair on his head. She stroked her hands down his abdomen, skirting his erection.

Oh heavens. Distraction at its very finest.

“I think I should shift now.”

She nodded, unable to tear her eyes away from the evidence of just how much he really wanted her.

“Maggie, did you hear me? I’m going to shift.” A tug on her arm made her drag her gaze back to his face. Erik wore a huge grin. “Although that’s a very nice expression you’ve got right now.”

“Okay, Wolfman, let me clap for you.”

Shimmering light flashed, transposing images registered on her retinas, and Erik lay on the blanket, all claws and black fur and teeth, and for one awful second, her heart stopped. She closed her eyes and felt for him. It was still Erik. Still the same sensation of power rolling off him, the same love and caring being projected. Gentleness mixed with his incredible strength.

Between the two of them, there was nothing they couldn’t accomplish.

Suddenly, that was all she needed. The final wall fell.

“Shift. I need to…I want to…”

She waited, shaking with the fever rippling through her veins. Her blouse came off in one motion, her skirt and bits of underwear flying after it. He changed back, his solid body reforming until he lay on the blanket, naked. She leapt on him, into his arms, tears pouring from her eyes.

“What’s wrong? I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to push you too fast. You don’t have to change. Maggie? Why are you naked?”

She sealed her mouth to his, stealing his words, taking his response. She lay skin-to-skin on top of him, his erection pressing against her belly. She wanted him. Needed him desperately, and there was nothing that would stop her.

He rolled them over, pausing before he covered her. He tangled his fingers in her hair, his tongue stroking and dancing with hers. The wind rustled the leaves overhead, swirls of his power wrapping around them. The pulsing beat between her legs jumped in tempo when he dragged a hand down her body and cupped her breast in the palm of his hand.

When he pulled back they both gasped for air. He stroked his thumb around the tender skin of her nipple, circling again and again as he stared into her eyes. “Are you sure? Make no mistake, I love you and I want you, but I will wait until you’re really ready. Don’t do this to try and convince your wolf to rise. Don’t do this unless you mean it.”

Maggie brought her hands to cradle his face. He was so damn big it was easy to forget just how tenderhearted he really was. Her wolf danced inside, waiting to be set free. But before she let her out, she wanted to please the woman.

“The mate thing? It’s there, I feel the chemistry between us. But my head says I love you as well. My wolf loves you. And now we need to stop talking and I need you inside me. Please.”

He closed his eyes, his face tight with restrained desire. “I didn’t want this to happen here. In the wilderness, no soft bed. I wanted it to be special.”

She slapped his shoulder. “Damn, it is special. It’s you, and me and that’s—”

He leaned over to consume her.