The Stainless Steel Rat Joins the Circus

Chapter 26

Bolivar had called Chaise before we went to the warehouse, but his secretary said he was too busy to come to the phone. I'll bet he was! It is not every day that one breaks the bank of the national economy. The copterport in Fetorrscoria had a restaurant with a secluded little bar attached. We found a table and placed our orders while Bolivar checked the copter back in. The strictly nonalcoholic MoggyCola at MacAlpo's had left a bad taste in my mouth. Which was quickly washed away by a double Rotgutt on the rocks. For a rare instance Angelina joined me in one as well, before switching to white wine.

"We need a plan and a checklist," I said as I pressed the order button for another round. James laid his palmtop computer on the table and made the entries as I listed them.

"A makeup kit to restore my face to its former bashed self when we take these bandages off. Some new handcuffsas well as a new cot to replace the one Bolivar destroyed."

"And one of those little eavesdropping bugs," Angelina said. "So when Chaise shows up we can listen in. James, I want you and your credit card to come shopping with me. I must outfit myself from the skin out."

"And we are going to need an awful lot of money to invest," Bolivar said, joining us at the table. "I can handle the currency purchases and futures—but only if I have the funds."

"That's where the Banco Cuerpo Especial comes in," I said. "Which is of course owned outright by the Special Corps… If you have any trouble squeezing out enough credits, get on to Inskipp to authorize the funds. Feel free to use my name."

Bolivar took a cab to the bank, while James took our shopping list. Angelina and I stayed in the warm security of the bar to await his return. I ordered another drink.

"After we take Chaise to the cleaners," I said, "I am looking forward to a good long break in the sunshine."

"So am I-for starters. But I am looking forward to a far longer one than that."

"Meaning what?"

"Meaning I think, that at our age, we ought to lead a quieter existence."

"What! Leave show business?"

"Yes. Leave show business, as well as all the monkey business that has kept us occupied down through the years. I'll hang up my guns if you'll hang up your lockpick."

I laughed-then saw that she was deadly serious. I contemplated a future in the sun in my rocking chair. Or wheelchair … "It would be, well, you might say, perhaps slightly … boring.' ,

.,Nonsense. We could travel, there are plenty of planets we haven't visited, meals we haven't eaten-"

"Drink we haven't drunk!"

"Now you are getting into the spirit of things." Her happy smile faded. "I don't complain, Jim, you know that's not like me. But I had plenty of time to think about the future, locked away by myself in that terrible room. It was, well, an experience I would not like to repeat."

"Being cuffed to that bed and left to maybe die of thirst made me feel the same way."

"That is exactly what I mean. We should never place ourselves in this kind of position again. You think about it."

"I will, I promise. Just as soon as we have taken Chaise to the cleaners."

"Of course. We'll tie this one up. Then walk away without looking back."

James appeared in the doorway and waved. Gloriana woke up and stretched. We went to join him. Holding hands, which felt very good indeed.

I will admit to feeling some hints of apprehension when we drew up before the warehouse. We waited outside until James had swept up all the bugs inside and put them in his insulated bag. Nor was I wildly enthusiastic when the cuffs clicked back on my wrists. Angelina was not happy either as she applied the makeup to my crunched face. Which looked even more crunched by the time she was through. She admired her handiwork, then frowned.

"James, I've changed my mind about having the shopping trip now. I'll take a cab to the hotel where you and Bolivar are staying. I'll have a long bubble bath and a rest. Let Gloriana have a bath too-we both need one. I want you to stay close by in case anything goes wrong here. I want us to forget Chaise and the money, revenge, the whole works, if it means putting your father in any kind of danger. Do you understand?"

"Loud and clear. I'll be nearby with my ear glued to the output of our pickup bug, but out of sight of the warehouse. We'll keep in touch with this." He held up what looked like a grain of rice. "Fits inside the ear and cannot be seen. Twoway talking, state of the art." He passed it over and I plugged it in.

Angelina had done a wonder job with the makeup, bringing my face back to the ruined condition it had been in earlier. When they were all done James unwrapped the various bugs and listening devices that Chaise has planted. Angelina blew me a silent kiss as they left.

Depression hit-but so did all the drinks-and I was asleep in seconds.

After a timeless period of rather repellent dreams I awoke as a voice whispered in my ear. Where the tiny and invisible communicator was located.

"Looks like Kaia's car coming towards the warehouse,"

James said.

"What time is it?" I shaped the words with my mouth, not speaking aloud but breathing in the lightest of whispers. James could make out what I was saying.

"Almost dawn. He sure put in a long day at the bank "

"And we know why. Stay in contact."

"You bet. "

In an emergency I could open the handcuffs; I hoped that I would not have to. If I played along, just for a short time more, our counterplot against his plot would surely work. I heard the outer door open and close. Then the footsteps approaching the door. A rattle on the knob as he opened it. I turned to look.

"Getting thirsty, Jim?" Chaise said. His eyes were surrounded by darkened shadows. Working night and day on his crooked schemes. But he still had enough energy left for some gratuitous sadism. I didn't answer, but tried a dry cough instead.

"You are going to get those bearer bonds for me?"

"Water …"

"Of course."

He returned with a mug of water. Held it out to me-then poured it onto the floor. I was all method acting now, gasping and mewling. He liked that.

"The bonds?"

"I'll … get them…" Cracking and husking of course.

A half a cup of tepid water was my reward. Just enough to keep me alive if I really had gone without. He looked at me coldly.

"I don't believe you," he said. "Jim diGriz does not give in that easily. I am going to be busy the next few days. So I think that we will wait for next week's delivery to pick up the bonds." I fell back and gasped dryly, which made him smile.

"Maybe a little water now and then-but no food. I want you weak but I don't want you to die on me. I think another week will bring you around to my side. If not—why then another week. Then perhaps I can supply some interesting interviews with your wife." I writhed realistically at that. "Even you will break, Jim, I guarantee that."

"Rot-in hell," I managed to gasp out as he left. Oh how much he must be enjoying my sadistic theatricals. I dug out the handful of eavesdropping bugs and sealed them once again in their soundproof bag. Then took them out again and spread them out on the bed. He would get suspicious if they stopped broadcasting for any length of time.

"Come and get me, James," I breathed into earphone. "I think that the stage is now set for the last act!"

James opened the hotel-room door as quietly as he could, but Angelina was already awake. Sitting on the couch, very fetching in a man's bathrobe, looking out at the pollution-tinted dawn.

"There is fresh coffee there on the table."

"Wonderful!" I poured two cups, passed one over to James. "Chaise has come and gone. He is sadistically going to leave me locked in there to stew in my own juices. Before he gets around to thinking about me again-he is going to discover that he has a lot more to think about than he ever realized." I rubbed at my fake scar, which was beginning to come loose. "I'm going to wash off the makeup, and maybe this scar as well, if enough palisade cells on the skin of my face have sloughed off. Will someone kindly call down for lots of breakfast?"

Gloriana, washed and blow-dried, was snoring away happily in her basket. She did not wake up as I cleansed my wounds and put on a matching bathrobe. I emerged to stare at the table laden with food. I am afraid that after that I talked with my mouth full.

"Mrungle…"

"Swallow first, talk later," Angelina wisely advised. I finally came up for air and sighed with satisfaction.

"The only thing missing is a cigar."

"I know all of your filthy habits," James said as he passed over a pocket humidor.

"We've raised them right," Angelina said.

We certainly had. Raised them, or dragged them up, right. Sons to be proud of. Not to say daughters-in-law.

"Is the game afoot?"

"Fleet of foot and galloping towards the finish line. The bottom dropped out of the Fetorr Credit when the market and the exchange opened this morning. Everyone is panicking other than our lot and Chaise. By the time everything closes tonight he will be the richest man on the planet."

"He thinks," Angelina said. "What happens then?"

"Bolivar is setting it up now." He looked at his watch. "We have some hours yet before the curtain comes down. Shall I pick you up here?"

"Please do." I scratched at a last remaining shard of scar. "I'll need some clothes."

"I'll take care of that," Angelina said, standing up. "Remember that the police are still looking for the face you are wearing now. I'll shop for you as well as myself. James, are you coming with me?"

"Sorry, but as much as I would like to help you spend money, I have more pressing business. Computer problems at the bank. But I've opened a no-limit account for you at Sharrods departmental store."

"That should be enough." She looked sharply at me. "Don't smoke and drink too much while I'm out."

"Never! A single cigar, a sip of wine. The sweet liquor of success is what we will all quaff together."

"That's more like it," James said and left.

I was grateful for the solitude. I was tired and sore in a number of places. But inordinately happy. An emotion that I was sure I shared with Angelina; shopping, shopping to her heart's content. The boys too, happy in their skilled work. Extracting vast amounts of money from reluctant crooked capitalists. And gently slipping the noose around Kaia's unsuspecting neck. I turned on some soul soothing music, then found some even more soul-soothing bottles in the bar.

And thought about our holiday to come. I was looking forward to some lazy months in the sun. And the minimum amount of exercise every day, just enough to work up an appetite for dinner.

But how much of that could I take before I got bored to tears? I was not really one who enjoyed just sitting around. Of course we could go the theater more often, even the opera. Maybe not; I shuddered at the thought of one shrill soprano too many. Would I start getting twitchy for some action? Maybe start sneaking out at night with a lockpick to open a safe or two? I must have dozed off at this point because loud snores woke me up. My own. I refreshed my drink and decided not to think any more about the future at this point. Wait, Jim, wait until the job is done.

Angelina was back by midday, leading a squadron of carrybots. The purchases were piled high, the carrybots dismissed, and very soon discarded wrapping littered the room while she displayed her purchases. Not only clothes for herself, but some cheery sports outfits for me.

We were dressed, eager and waiting when the door opened. James was back at last.

"How is everything going?" I called out.

"Everything is going according to plan," Chaise said, coming through the door, large gun steady and pointed.