Greywalker

Chapter 19

At seven a.m. Wednesday morning, I rolled out of bed to stagger around the water tower. It was the worst I'd felt in a week, but I was doing much better at keeping the Grey at bay—at least when there were no ghosts or witches or vampires around. It was an ever-present thin mist dodging around the edges of my vision now, throwing occasional ghost-shapes over the landscape ahead. The constant flickering at the corners of my eyes left me a little dizzy.

When I stumbled home, I called Colleen Shadley to say I'd found Cameron.

Silence sat on the line a while before she asked, "Under what circumstances?"

"Living in his car down in Pioneer Square." "Why? That's not like him." "He had a personal problem and he panicked." "Ridiculous. Why didn't he call me? I certainly could have taken care of it."

"He was scared but wanted to take care of the problem himself. He got in a little over his head. I've agreed to help him deal with it," I explained. "He should be calling you soon. If you don't hear from him, please let me know."

"It must be drugs," she stated. "It's the only way I can account for this behavior."

That sounded familiar. "This has nothing to do with drugs. He's just young and his situation was more complicated than he realized."

"What is this situation you keep talking about?" she demanded.

"Cameron wanted to discuss it with you himself." I was biting my tongue pretty hard as my temper rose. Sarah's view of her mother snapped into focus.

"I paid for this investigation. You have a contractual obligation to tell me."

The temperature of my voice hovered near freezing. "No, Colleen. The contract gives me discretion on matters not directly bearing on the job, and I'm exercising that clause. You paid for me to find your son, not to spy on him. If he doesn't call you within twenty-four hours, then I'll be glad to discuss whatever you want. But your son asked for some time to straighten out a few things and I'm giving him that courtesy."

"Will I be billed for this 'courtesy'?"

"No."

"I'll call you as soon as I hear from Cameron. Or not." She cracked the phone into the cradle as she hung up.

I slithered out of my sweats and running shoes and flopped back into bed. I felt like a Chihuahua in a wind tunnel. Flat on my back, eyes closed… I was more tired than I should have been, but the constant wearing nausea was gone. I couldn't see the Grey. I was aware of it, but it wasn't immediate. Without the flickering, the treacherous false ground, the heaving, unstill world on top of the world, only fatigue remained. It was the Grey that left me queasy and worn, the uneven, sporadic view, the constant expenditure of energy to figure out what was real and hold back the rest.

Groaning, I got up and called Mara. Inside an hour, I was back in the Danzigers' kitchen.

I held on to a cup of coffee, but I wasn't drinking it. "I have to get a handle on this. I know I'm a lousy student, but bear with me. I agreed to help Cameron with his problem, but I'll have to get closer to the Grey to do it."

Mara started to say something and I waved her down. "And much as I don't like it, you were right. This isn't going away. I don't want to be a witch or a psychic or a Greywalker or anything else. I just want to do my job, but I can't seem to without help. Cameron is… well, he's not quite like the rest of us, and I'm going to have to deal with more like him. And this other investigation keeps turning up dead men. I've never dealt with this many recently deceased in my life. I'm at three now and the coincidence is bugging me. What's with the dead guys?"

Mara swallowed a bite of muffin. "I've been considering that. You're like a pebble in a pond, putting out Grey ripples, and all the fishes in that pond come swimming to see. That's part of the difficulties you've been having. They swarm around and frighten you. And perhaps a few of them are pushing you in some way you can't yet discern."

"You mean like that geas thing?"

"No. What I'm wondering, now that it's come up, is this. If a vampire, like Cameron, can have problems which need help solving, why not other creatures of the Grey? Some of them can't communicate well, and others may need help which cannot be easily found. And here you are. Perhaps the number of dead you are turning up is no coincidence at all, but a sign that you're dealing with something out of the ordinary. And as they're attracted to you, so are a lot of other Grey things."

I forced a laugh. "I hope not. The last thing I want is a client list from a horror novel."

"If they choose to come to you, how will you turn them away? And is it even fair to do so?"

I put the coffee cup down. "Don't start on the ethics. I'm already tied up about this as it is."

She shrugged, but she'd made her point.

I picked apart a muffin, scattering the bits around my plate.

Mara pushed hers aside. "I looked up a couple of simple tricks and I'm thinking they might help you out."

"Not more trips to the Grey today, please, Mara."

"No, no. These are truly simple. In a way, you already know one and the other's not any harder."

I sighed. "What've you got?"

She grinned, her eyes sparkling with excitement. "You've learned to push the Grey back so it's just a bit of a flicker on the edges, right?"

I nodded.

"So, if you look sideways and concentrate on that Grey flicker you should be just seeing into the Grey. Sort of a filter."

"Hey… I think I did that, in a way, when I was looking for Cameron in his car."

"Then all you need do now is refine the technique. Don't look straight on, just peek out of the corner of your eye."

The first few times I tried it, the Grey just slipped around and disappeared, but I got the hang of it pretty quickly.

As I peered from the corner of my eye while the sensation of the Grey barrier raised the hair on my arms, a tiny slice of the world went cold silver. I could see white shapes squirreling along the floor and up the walls like vines, weaving glowing lattices through the house.

I gasped. "That's why nothing gets in here! That's why you weren't worried about Cameron. The house has a… a…"

Mara whooped. "Tender's Lace. It's a protective charm, just very large. Let's try the other. This time, you'll need to sort of grab the edge of the Grey and bend it round you."

"What? I thought you said I didn't need to go in there."

"You don't. You can do it from either side if you can catch the thing. That'll be the tricky part."

I narrowed my eyes. "Why would I want to?"

"Because, while the edge of the Grey is no barrier to you, it is to one of them. If you can bend a bit of the edge around you, it'll act as a shield. Not for very long, I suspect, but it should at least bounce things back from you, if they aren't too solid. Wouldn't have much of an effect on Cameron, but should keep a ghost back. You could try it with Albert."

"I'd rather take your word for it than invite Albert to cuddle up, if you don't mind."

"Why? Do you think he's angry at you?"

"I'd rather not find out today."

"Try the trick anyway. I can test it, if you prefer."

"I'm still not so sure…"

I felt around for the edge of the Grey, but since I was trying to grab it, naturally I couldn't. I could only find it as a rippling wall of here/ there. Every time I tried to catch it, it bulged away.

"It's not physical," Mara reminded me. "It's a mental trick. Just push it around."

I pushed. The cloud-mist in front of me curved, leaving a clear bubble between me and it. I moved my hands to grab it, not thinking. The Grey gleamed like glass in front of my hands and slid a bit, keeping the same distance as before. I stared at it and moved my hands apart.

The gleaming bit of Grey grew. It felt heavy, as if the Grey not-mist had developed weight and was pushing back on my hands. My finger-tips went white from the intense cold. I jerked my hands back and the Grey slumped back into its usual roiling storm-light.

I moved around and pushed on it again, feeling the deformation stiffen and grow heavy with cold. I pushed harder and popped through it, tumbling into the chill, instantly swamped in the cold, writhing haze. For an instant I was disoriented and afraid, but I caught my breath and a whiff of weird chemicals and pushed my way back out. Mara put out a hand, as if that would help.

She looked me over. "That almost worked. Try it again."

I shook her off. "No way. Not right now. It's wearing me out. I don't feel so good around this stuff, anyway. It smells bad, it's cold, and it gives me vertigo. There's no up and down in there."

"Is it really that appalling? I had no idea."

"The difference between theory and practice I guess."

She laughed. "Ha! Hoist on me own petard! Still you should try—"

"I'll practice, but not right now. Thanks for the tips, though"

"Glad to. Should help you keep the beasties at bay. And there will be more. You're making waves, remember."

"I do, but I have one question. Why do they seem to go away when I'm in my truck?"

"Do they? They never really go away, so if you're not seeing the Grey, it's because the truck's material acts as a filter. It's got no connection to the Grey. It keeps them out, but it also keeps you in."

"That's fine. I can't start thinking about monsters from the Grey descending on me, or I'll start screaming. Even if I can make myself believe in them."

"But Harper.»

I waved through her words. "I know, I know, but it's one thing to say you do and see one or two bits of proof and another to get your head around the whole, enormous thing. I'm trying to keep my balance. I'm not used to this brand of open-mindedness. I'm a cynic by nature and training and likely to stay that way."

Mara heaved a sigh. "I know. But so long as you're fighting it, the Grey will be a minefield for you. Be careful. Learn to accept it."

"I'm working on it, Mara. I am."

I wished I didn't have to.

I was just ahead of rush hour all the way to Bellevue.

Nothing seemed to have changed at Sarah's house. The motorcycle parts still reposed outside, the lawn still played dead. Sarah answered my knock before I finished. I almost rapped on her forehead. She didn't seem to notice. She was grinning.

"Hi, Harper! Cam said you might drop by. Come on in. I've got some coffee on, if you want some, she added, holding the door So Cam got in touch with you?" I asked as I settled myself at the table.

"Yeah," she called over her shoulder as she gathered up the coffee things. "He came by kind of late last night. Like, about two a.m."

She brought the tray and sat down with me. "I was kinda surprised to see him. I mean, you said you thought you'd find him pretty quick, but I didn't expect it to be that quick. And then he starts telling me this crazy story, and I thought he was jerking my chain, at first. I mean, that is one weird tale. A vampire? Like I think that's likely…"

"What do you think now?" I asked.

"It sounds crazy, but I believe him. It… it kind of fits. Mom is not going to be cool with this, though. I'm still a little out of it on some of the details myself. Cam couldn't stay a real long time, y'know. He said you're making him call Mom tonight. Is that right?"

"I'm not holding a gun to his head. I told him it was the reasonable, responsible thing to do. If he had called her a month ago, I never would have gotten the case. Even if he'd made up some kind of lie to tell her, your mother would have at least known he was around."

"I know," she said, rocking her shoulders in a queer, rolling shrug. "It's just going to be hard to tell her the truth and get her to believe it. Mom's imagination is limited to interior design and party planning."

"We'll have to wait and see."

"Yeah, I guess. I got the feeling there's still some kind of problem, but like I said, we didn't have a lot of time. Is he going to be all right?"

"I think so," I replied. "Something needs to be resolved, yet, but once that's taken care of, things should be OK. But this is pretty strange stuff to be going through on your own."

"You got that right." She shuddered. "It makes me pretty creeped out to think about it. Edward could have gotten me, too, y'know."

I shook my head. "I haven't gotten a handle on this guy yet, but I don't think he would have done the same thing to you. You're not the same sort of person as your brother, and I think the personality clash made all the difference. At least, that's what I think right now. I could change my mind by this time next week." I didn't add that I suspected the natural path of Edward's games with Sarah would have led to the county morgue.

"In the meantime," I continued, "I'm going to try to help Cameron resolve his problem. Can I call on you if I need your help?"

"Sure," she said. "Anything you need." She got a notebook out of her purse and scribbled on a page, ripped it out, and handed it to me. "That's my boyfriend's cell phone number. He left it with me while he's in Italy."

I cocked a quizzical look at her. "You've had a phone all this time?"

"Yeah, but I wasn't going to let my mom know that." She grinned and became a very pretty girl with very ugly hair.

"I won't tell her," I promised.

"Thanks."

Back across the water, I stopped at the office to check my messages.

"Ms. Blaine, of course paying for information is no problem. Up t… five hundred dollars? This will be acceptable. Please keep me informed." Sergeyev really wanted this thing.

I wrote myself a note, then headed home.

I checked Chaos when I got home and found her sleeping, ignoring me with a will. I looked toward the chair and the narrow, awful-red cabinet and let them wait. I flopped onto the couch with a beer and indulged in total, potato-headed TV-watching.

I was fascinated by some kind of nature show about Australia when the phone rang. I answered and was ambushed.

"I just talked to my son, thank you," Colleen Shadley started, "and he told me some… cockamamie story about vampires and night-clubs and I don't know what. Now, you—you tell me what is really going on!"

"I'm not certain myself yet," I answered. "It's complicated."

"That's hogwash! Why is he doing this to me? Why is Cameron lying to me? I hired you to find my son and you seem to have found some kind of nut!"

"Are you saying that the man you just spoke to was not your son?" I asked.

"No, I am not!"

"So it was Cameron who called?"

"Well, it sounded like him. Except for this wild tale-telling. Now, you tell me the truth, damn it!"

"Well," I drawled, "I am pretty well convinced your son is a vampire."

"What!" she shrieked. "Have you gone completely insane!"

"No." My speech was like molasses. "I don't want to upset you, Colleen, but, as the Bard said, 'There are more things in heaven and earth… I wasn't inclined to believe it myself, at first, but Cam has said and demonstrated some things that convince me that he's… not factory spec anymore. And he still has some problems to resolve."

She barked. Well, it sounded like a cross between a growl and a bark, and it wasn't the sound I was expecting. "I want you over here— now!" She spat out the address and slammed down the phone. I pushed the disconnect button. The phone rang again before I could even put it down.

Cam sounded about eight years old. "Harper? Did my mom call you?"

"Yes. She just hung up."

"Is she still upset?"

"Upset would be a very mild description. I have been ordered into the presence at once. How 'bout you?"

"Me, too. Umm… do you want to go together? I could pick you up."

"I think separate cars would be better. There's no guarantee we'd be leaving at the same time."

"All right. I'll see you over there."

I hung up and went looking for my shoes. I tickled my computer and got it to spit out a copy of my bill, just in case.

On the way to Bellevue, I considered what I was heading into. I hadn't really expected Cameron to try the truth on her quite so soon, and I hadn't any idea how Colleen Shadley would react once I arrived. I supposed that she wanted me out there so she could fire me or demand answers she liked better than her son's. I didn't think she'd like mine any better, but since I'd already completed the task, she couldn't fire me.

She could refuse the bill, though, and that would be unpleasant. I hadn't had to remind a client of nonpayment in a long time and I didn't look forward to it. Colleen was the lawyers-and-litigation type, without a doubt, and Nan Grover wouldn't like having to choose between a friend and me. No matter what happened, it wasn't going to be fun.

The Shadley house sprawled in one of the horse-trail suburbs where the yards run to an acre or two around houses of equal size. I had to wander a bit to get into the nest of twisted streets and up the curving, grumpy rises to the rambling stone house that hung back from the street like a shy child behind a screen of cypress trees. Cameron's green Camaro stood in the driveway.

The air near the house flickered a bit to my gaze and familiar, cold nausea slid a bodkin along my ribs. I looked sideways at the curtain between here and there, probing the dark spots until I thought I had looked into them all. I caught the shape…

"Hi," he said, and I twitched, not quite prepared. Cam was waiting in the shadows of the trellised entry. "I didn't want to go in without you."

"Afraid your mother will eat you?" I asked.

"Sort of. I've never heard her this mad. I mean, she yells at Sarah once in a while, but not like this. She's hot."

"I noticed." I took a few deep, slow breaths before continuing. "All right. Let's beard the lioness." I rang the bell. The porch light came on and the door wrenched open.

Colleen glared at both of us and directed us in. Cam, the coward, let me go first. She led us into a stiff, formal room. I shot a glance at Cameron and he made a grimace. This must have been the child-free zone of his youth, approached only on formal occasions or under parental indictment. We were being called onto the antique Chinese carpet.

Cameron's mother sat down on the pale cream sofa and pointed us at narrow-backed chairs without armrests. I sat on the love seat across from her instead. After a second's pause, Cameron sat next to me.

Colleen reined in a scowl, but didn't comment. "I would like an explanation out of both of you. Now."

Cameron started to answer, "Mo—"

I cut him off with a hand gesture, presenting his mother a bland face. "Of what, Colleen?"

"Of this phone call I had from Cameron this evening. Of what is really going on. Now, please."

"I think we need some clarification first," I suggested, sitting back and stretching out my legs to their full, space-hogging length. I crossed my booted feet at the ankle, heels pointing at her in insouciant despite. "You hired me to find your son and I have, unless you claim that this young man is not your son. Is he?"

"Yes, of course he is," she replied. "But—"

"Then you agree that I've supplied the service you contracted for."

She hedged. "Up to a point."

"There was no other point agreed on in the contract or our discussion, Colleen. As his mother, you were concerned for your son. As the executrix of his trust fund, you were concerned for your trustee. Here he is—son and trustee, whole and sound. I'm willing to discuss the case with you insofar as it doesn't intrude on Cameron's privacy—even further with his permission. But, professionally and ethically, that's all I will do."

She glowered, but she also knew I had her, as far as contracts were concerned. "Very well, then. You can send me your bill and go now."

Cameron was vibrating with tension, his flickering making me dizzy. "I want her to stay. Mom, I'm sorry I tried to run away from my problem and that I didn't get in touch with you a lot earlier, but I knew you would have a hard time with this. I had a hard time with it, and I'm still having a hard time. I wish you'd cut me some slack."

"Slack? You sound just like your sister. You think you'll be handled with kid gloves if you just whine enough."

"I'm not whining. I'm trying to explain," he said, shooting his arms out to the side and nearly smacking me. I refused to flinch.

She snapped back at him. "Evading and lying is more to the point. You can't imagine how disappointed I am in you."

"Actually, Mom, I've got a pretty good idea. I got in over my head. I did some stupid things. I'm disappointed in me, too. But that doesn't change the situation. I'm still… what I am," he finished, dropping his hands between his knees.

"A vampire? Cameron, really!"

"Smile, Cameron," I suggested.

He rolled his eyes at me and made an ugly grimace. His lips peeled back from his teeth and his too-sharp canines glinted in the light. Colleen recoiled and stared.

"Andrew Cameron! Stop that. Who did you persuade to mutilate your teeth like that?"

"They're not fake, Mom," he said. "They came with the outfit, so to speak. So did this." He shimmered a little and became Grey. I spotted him right off this time, and grinned.

Ignoring me, Colleen jerked forward. "Cameron! Cameron! Stop that! Stop it!" she yelled. She turned her glare on me again.

I shook my head, stone-faced again. "No smoke and mirrors here."

She reached out and flailed at what seemed to her thin air. She slapped her son on the shoulder.

"Ow!" he yelped and shimmered back into the normal.

She grabbed on to him with both hands, which pulled her off the sofa. She crouched on the floor in front of him and held on tight to his upper arms.

"What did you do? Where did you go?" she demanded.

"I was right here, Mom. You just couldn't see me. I don't know how it works. I just concentrate on being gone and I disappear." He tried to shrug, but she held him too hard. "It just comes with the job, I guess."

"Can you do it while she's touching you?" I asked, half curious, half hoping to prove something to Cameron's mother.

"I can try." He shimmered away again as Colleen held on for dearest life.

She let out a wail and plopped onto her backside. "Cameron!"

He came back. "I'm still here, Mom."

"Oh, my God," she gasped and put her hands up to her face. Oblivious of her makeup, she rubbed her cheeks and temples and smeared her hands up into her hair. "My God, my God." She crumpled into a ball and began sobbing.

"Mom! Mom, it's OK. It's all right. I'm not going to hurt you or anything." He crouched down on the rug beside his mother and put his arms around her. "Mom? Are you OK?"

She wailed and pressed the top of her head against her son's chest. He rocked her and babbled soothing words. I stood up and looked around.

"Kitchen?" I asked.

"Out the other door and through the dining room," Cameron whispered, jerking his head toward a door we had not used before.

I nodded and went out.

Somehow, Colleen Shadley didn't strike me as the sort to resort to hard liquor for shock. I made tea. While it was brewing, though, I hunted up a bottle of cognac and put a good dose of the stuff into one of the cups. I juggled three full cups back out to the sitting room.

Cameron had gotten his mother back on the sofa, though she was still clinging to him a bit and sniffling.

I handed her the cup with the potent brew. "This'll help. Better drink it."

Cameron found her a box of tissues as she snuck up on her first sip. She shuddered and made a face, but took a scalding gulp and then another. Then she took a tissue and dabbed at her smeared eyes and blew her nose in a delicate, ladylike fashion.

"I–I—that wasn't good of me," she said.

Cameron patted her arm. "Mom. It's OK. You were… shocked. It's OK."

She nodded her head and drank some more tea. She set the cup down on the glass-covered table beside the sofa. "I'm sorry," she said. "I can't take any more of that muck. I need a drink."

So much for my assessment of character.

Cameron got up and went looking for liquor. Colleen, face streaked with mascara and lipstick, looked at me and raised her eyebrows.

"What am I going to do?" she asked.