Brain World

Chapter Nine

Switching from the hours kept on the Sheppard to those of Einstein had thrown Ronny’s sleeping schedule off, and he found himself awake at an earlier hour than he had expected. He looked over at Rosemary, whose blond head was on the pillow next to him. She was out like a light, and was even making a very small snore. Even after the wild night they had put in, and in the harsh light of morning, she still looked like the most beautiful woman he had ever bedded.

Moving very carefully, so as not to awaken her, he got up and carried one of his bags into the small sitting room, along with the clothes he had worn the day before. Possibly here on Einstein they disposed of clothing after one day’s wear, but, even had he wanted to emulate them, he didn’t know how to go about ordering new ones. Besides, he and Dorn hadn’t met the committee Rosemary had mentioned and he decided to continue his ultra-conservative attire until they had. Ronny didn’t particularly like it but he didn’t particularly look the diplomatic type—though Dorn pulled it off very well—and conservative clothes would help.

They had both slept nude. He went into the bath and had little trouble figuring out the fixtures. He had figured out bathroom fixtures of many a culture in his time, including an outhouse on the anarchist planet Bakunin. This on Einstein was quite similar to those on Earth and the other advanced planets. He even found depilatory and used it on his beard.

His toilet over, he returned to the sitting room and, still as quietly as possible, to refrain from interrupting the slumber of his bedmate, dressed in fresh underthings, fresh socks and shirt, but otherwise in the same suit he had worn the day before.

He quietly let himself out onto the patio and from there went into the living room. He found Dorn Horsten in the dining room, having coffee and toast. Evidently, his sleep, too, had been upset by the change in schedule.

He smiled self-satisfaction and said, “I figured out how to order coffee on this table. I’ve never seen an automated table before that didn’t at least have an order screen. In fact, I don’t believe I’ve ever seen an automated table in a home out in the boondocks like this. However, I suppose that if you can pipe electricity, water and gas into a home from a distant point there’s no particular reason why you couldn’t send food from some automated kitchen. They probably have a vacuum tube arrangement.”

“Coffee?” Ronny said, taking a seat across from the other. “I thought that coffee wasn’t drunk on Einstein.”

“That captain didn’t know what he was talking about. He also said that they didn’t drink alcohol. Whatever we find here on Einstein, it won’t be an austere way of life. I’ll wager he never got out of his space freighter here.

“Wizard. Order me a cup of coffee, some croissants and some orange marmalade.”

Dorn Horsten projected his voice over the table and repeated the order.

While Ronny was waiting for it, his companion told him about the happenings of the night before.

Ronny stared at him. “What in the name of the Holy Ultimate were they looking for?”

“I can’t come up with anything.”

The light breakfast arrived and Ronny set to, scowling.

He said, finally, “From what little we’ve seen and heard so far it doesn’t seem to be a planet where you’d run into burglars. They dont even bother to put locks on the doors.”

Dorn could only nod and poured more coffee for himself. “You’d think this was Earth-side coffee,” he said, “or even better.”

Ronny said, “And this marmalade obviously was made from real oranges. It’s seldom you get good citrus fruit off Earth.”

When he had finished his croissants, they took up fresh cups of coffee and went out into the living room.

After they were seated, Dorn said, “Did you find out anything special, after we separated last night?”

“Yeah,” Ronny said. “They have sex tutors for the kids here. Give them a course in how to perform in bed, after they become adolescent.”

Horsten snorted. “That’d make for a howl on Virtue. They still wear Mother Hubbards there.”

“It’d make for a howl on some of the other backward worlds,” Ronny said. “But not enough to keep Einstein out of United Planets. I still wonder why in the hell they want to bother to join. They’ve got it made. What can we do for them?”

A voice from the door said, “Am I intruding?”

The newcomer was accompanied by a male dog who had short and dark golden hair, and even golden eyes, and a bobbed tail, and who would possibly weigh seventy-five pounds. It was a beautiful hound. The man himself seemed to be approximately fifty years of age, was handsome and distinguished of face, looked very intelligent and wore kilts very similar to the ones Rosemary had on the day before. Somehow, on him they looked quite masculine, while on Rosemary they had not detracted from her femininity.

The two Section G agents put down their cups and came to their feet.

“Certainly not,” Dorn Horsten said. “I am Doctor Dorn Horsten and this… ”

“Is the famed Ronald Bronston,” the other smiled, advancing. “My name is Fredric.”

They shook hands, Earth-style.

Fredric said, “I am one of the committee elected to meet you. It is a pleasure. That coffee smells excellent. I think I shall go to Rosemary’s dining room and get a cup.”

Ronny and Dorn sat down again and took up their beverages.

Ronny said, “He doesn’t sound any more of an egghead than anybody else.”

The dog came over and extended his right paw and said to Ronny, “Hello, glad, to meet you.”

Ronny looked at him for a long empty moment, before shaking the paw.

The dog said, “What’s your name again?”

“Ronny. What’s yours?”

The golden dog hung his long red tongue out from the side of his mouth and gave a double pant before saying, looking all the world as though he was embarrassed. “Boy. These people have no imagination. I suppose I shouldn’t complain. I’ve got a friend they call Fido.”

He turned and went over to Dorn Horsten, who was gaping at him as much as was Ronny. He held out his paw and said, “Glad to meet you, too.”

Dorn shook and said, “The feeling is mutual. I am absolutely fascinated to meet you.”

The dog sat down on the floor and looked up at him. “You’re from Earth, aren’t you? I understand that dogs don’t talk on Earth. Why not?”

The eminent biologist looked at him blankly. “It never occurred to me to wonder about it,” he said.

Fredric came back from the dining room, coffee cup in hand. He was smiling and had evidently heard the last of the conversation. He said to Boy, “On Earth, practically no animals, save man, have voice boxes. Some that do, such as the parrot, the Myna bird, and, to a certain extent, the higher anthropoid apes, have insufficient brain capacity to utilize them intelligently. Now, that will be all for the time, Boy.”

“Okay,” Boy said and stretched out on the floor.

“Now wait a minute,” Dorn blurted. “This isn’t a farce, is it? I mean, you’re not a ventriloquist?”

“No. Certainly not,” Fredric told him, after taking a sip of his coffee. “When our people left Earth for Einstein, we brought with us quite a bit of the fauna of the mother planet. Man’s immediate pets, such as the dog and cat, who have come down with him through the millenia, almost as though there was a symbiotic relationship, we chose on the basis of intelligence. In the case of the cat, the Siamese. With the dog, the Poodle and Vizsla. Boy is a Vizsla.”

“I’ve never heard of the breed,” Ronny said unhappily. “But even if I had, I doubt if they talk on Earth. You must be one hell of a trainer.”

The other smiled, as though Ronny was making a joke. He said, “The Vizsla is one of the oldest breeds. They came with the Magyars from the steppes of Siberia to Europe. They were originally war dogs, then hunting hounds, and are the most versatile of all. They were pointers as well as retrievers and would hunt any game from birds to wild boar, to elk, or bear, for that matter.”

“That was a long time ago,” Boy said. “There’s nothing to hunt on Einstein.”

Dorn Horsten said, “But… but, this talking.” The other shrugged. “Man has had the dog for as long as we can trace him back. The relationship has become almost a necessity. However, we found it inconvenient for our pets to be so very less intelligent than we. So we performed genetic surgery and altered their DNA to produce a voice box, and upgraded their intelligence considerably through selective breeding and other devices.” I He seemed to think that was sufficient explanation.

Ronny stared at Boy, who was lying there on the floor, his tongue dangling out the side of his mouth.

Ronny said, “I’ve always liked dogs. I’d give my right arm for… ”

“The animal is yours,” Fredric said. Ronny boggled at him. He said, “Oh, really, now. That’s very kind of you, but… ”

“What’s the matter?” Boy said. “Don’t you want me?” Aside from a guttural quality, his voice tone was quite good and very understandable.

Fredric said, “Think nothing of it. Dogs are a hobby of mine but I have quite a few and was planning to dispense with some of them. Boy is one of the few I’ve ever taught Amer-English. The others speak our version of Esperanto. He even reads Amer-English quite well, though his taste in novels is atrocious.”

“But, well in my whole life I never expected a dog like Boy to belong to me.”

“We’ll soon find out who belongs to whom,” the dog muttered.

“Good. It’s done,” Fredric said. “None of the others of the committee have shown up as yet, eh?”

The dog had got up, walked over to Ronny, gave his leg a good smell, seemed to approve, and stretched out at his feet.

Dorn Horsten said, “Rosemary has been kind enough to inform us of some of your usages. She mentioned that you have no officials on Einstein. But this committee of yours? Aren’t you officials?”

“Oh, no. Not in the ordinary sense of the word. We’re a temporary committee elected to meet this particular situation. That is, to answer any questions you might wish to ask about Einstein, or to show you anything you might wish to see.”

“Who elected you?” Ronny said.

The other scowled slightly at him, as though the question didn’t make much sense. “Why, the people.”

“All of the people?”

“All who bothered to vote.”

Dorn Horsten pushed his glasses further back on the bridge of his nose. He said, “Well, who nominated you, Citizen Fredric?”

“Just Fredric,” the other said. “Anyone who wished to.”

Ronny had reached down to give the dog’s back a scratch and was rewarded with a double wag of the tail. He said, “That’s not very clear. Would you elucidate?”

“Certainly. When the news was released that you were on your way, it became obvious that there would have to be a committee. The computers were consulted as to what citizens would be best suited to act. Then our people nominated whomever they wished. The twelve who received the most nominations were put up for the vote. Those of us who were interested voted and the six who received the largest number of votes became the committee.”

“How did Rosemary get into the act?” Ronny said.

Fredric looked at him, and said, “We of the committee selected her.”

“Let’s go back for a moment,” Dorn Horsten said. “You said all of the people, and Rosemary have already mentioned that you have complete sexual equality. But what is the minimum age of the electorate?”

“There is none.”

Ronny frowned. “You mean a ten year old child can vote in your elections?”

“If he or she so wishes. Usually a child of that age has little interest in elections, or has insufficient knowledge of whatever subject is being considered. But if the vote is being taken on some subject in which he is interested and has an opinion, why yes, he can and does vote.”

Ronny shook his head. This was a new one. He said, “To return to this no-officials thing. You’ve got to have at least some officials to run your government.”

The other shook his head. “Didn’t Rosemary tell you? We have no government.”

While the two Section G agents were gawking at him, Rosemary walked in. She was attired in practically identical clothing to that she had worn the day before and she made a little yawn before smiling her bright smile. “Good morning, Dorn and Ronny. Good morning, Fredric. Did everyone sleep well?” Without waiting for an answer, she departed into the dining room, obviously in search of coffee herself.

Ronny said, “No government! Do you mean that yours is an anarchist socio-economic system? It’s one thing for a backward agricultural society such as Kropotkin to have no government. But Einstein would seem to be one of the most advanced worlds, economically, scientifically, technologically and so forth. You can’t run a society like this without a government.”

Fredric sipped at his coffee. “Yes, you can,” he said mildly.

Dorn Horsten shook his head in amazement. He said, “And you have no president, no premier, no king or other head of state?”

“We don’t have a state, let alone a head of state.”

The dog looked up from where he’d had his head resting on his paws, cocked his ears forward a little, and said in a half growl, “Somebody is coming.”