A Knight of the Word

CHAPTER 5

Ariel paused, and Nest found that she couldn't keep quiet any longer.

`You mean he quit?' she demanded incredulously. `He just quit?'

The tatterdemalion seemed to consider. `He no longer thinks of himself as a Knight of the Word, so he has stopped acting like one. But he can never quit. The choice isn't his to make'

Her words carried a dark implication that Nest did not miss. `What do you mean?'

Ariel's childlike face seemed to shimmer in the midday sun as she shifted her stance slightly. It was the first time she had moved, and it almost caused her to disappear.

`Only the Lady can create a Knight of the Word, and only the Lady can set one free: Ariel's voice was so soft that Nest could barely hear her. `John Ross is bound to his charge. When he took up the staff that gives him his power, he bound himself forever. He cannot free himself of the staff or of the charge. Even if he no longer thinks of himself as a Knight of the Word, he remains one'

Nest shook her head in confusion. 'But he isn't doing anything to be a Knight of the Word. He's given it all up, you said. So what difference does it make whether or not he really is a Knight of the Word? If he's not only stopped thinking of himself as a Knight, but he's stopped functioning as one, he might as well be a bricklayer.'

Ariel nodded. `This is what John Ross believes, as well. This is why he is in so much danger:

Nest hesitated. How much of this did she really want to know? The Lady hadn't sent Ariel just to bring her up to date on what was happening to John Ross. The Lady wanted something from her, and where Ross was concerned, she wasn't at all sure it would be something she wanted to give. She hadn't seen or heard from Ross in five years, and they hadn't parted under the best of circumstances. John Ross had come to Hopewell to accomplish one of two things–to help thwart her father's intentions for her or to make certain she would never carry them out. He had seen her future, and while he would not describe it to her, he made it clear that it was dark and horrific. So she would live to change it or she would die. That was his mission in coming to Hopewell. He had admitted it at the end, just before he left. She had never quite gotten over it. This was a man she had grown to like and respect and trust. This was a man she had believed for a short time to be her father-a man she would have liked to have had for a father.

And he had come to kill her if he couldn't save her. The truth was shattering. He was not a demon, as her real father had been, but he was close enough that she was still unable to come to terms with how she felt about him.

`The difficulty for John Ross is that he cannot stop being a Knight of the Word just because he chooses to,' Ariel said suddenly.

She had moved to within six feet of Nest. Nest hadn't seen her do that, preoccupied with her thoughts of Ross. The tatterdemalion was close enough that Nest could see the shadowy things that moved inside her semitransparent farm like scraps of stray paper stirred by the wind. Pick had told her that tatterdemalions were made up mostly of dead children's memories and dreams, and that they were born fully grown and did not age afterward but lived only a short time. All of them took on the aspects of the children who had formed them, becoming something of the children themselves while never achieving real substance. Magic shaped and hound them for the time they existed, and when the magic could no longer hold them together, the children's memories and dreams simply scattered into the wind and the tatterdemalion was gone.

`But the magic John Ross was given binds him forever; Ariel said. `He cannot disown it, even if he chooses not to use it. It is a part of him. It marks him. He cannot be anything other than what he is, even if he pretends otherwise. Those who serve the Word will always know him. More importantly, those who serve the Void will know him as well'

`Oh, oh,' muttered Pick, sitting up a little straighter.

`He is in great danger,' Ariel repeated. `Neither the Word nor the Void will accept that he is no longer a Knight. Both seek to bind him to their cause, each in a different way. The Word has already tried reason and persuasion and has failed. The Void will try another approach. A Knight who has lost his faith is susceptible to the Void's treachery and deceit. The Void will seek to turn John Ross through subterfuge. He will have begun to do so already. John Ross will not know that it is happening. He will not see the truth of things until it is too late. It does not happen all at once; it does not happen in a recognisable way. It will begin with a single misstep. But once that first step is taken, the second becomes much easier. The path is a familiar one. Knights have been lost to the Void before:

Nest brushed at a few stray strands of hair that had blown into her eyes. Clouds were moving in from the west. She had read that rain was expected later in the day. `Does he know this will happen?' she asked sharply, almost accusatorily. She was suddenly angry. `How many years of his life has he given to the Word? Doesn't he at least deserve a warning?'

Ariel's body shimmered, and her eyes blinked slowly, flower petals opening to the sun. `He has been warned. But the warning was ignored. John Ross no longer trusts us. He no longer listens. He believes himself free to do as he chooses. He is a prisoner of his self–deception'

Nest thought about John Ross, picturing him in her mind. She saw a lean, raw–boned, careworn man with haunted eyes and a rootless existence. But she saw a fiercely determined man as well, hardened of purpose and principle, a man who would not be easily swayed. She could not imagine how the Void would turn him. She remembered the strength of his commitment; he would die before he would betray it.

Yet he had already given it up, hadn't he? By shedding his identity as a Knight of the Word, he had given it up. She knew the truth of things. People changed. Lives took strange turns.

`The Lady sent me to ask you to go to John Ross and warn him one final time'

Ariel's words jarred her. Nest stared in disbelief. `Me? Why would he listen to me?'

`The Lady says you hold a special place in his heart: Ariel said it in a matter–of–fact way, as if Nest ought to know what this would mean. `She believes that John Ross will listen to you, that he trusts and respects you, and that you have the best chance of persuading him of the danger he faces:

Nest shook her head stubbornly: `I wouldn't know what to say. I'm not the right choice for this: She hesitated. `Look, the truth is, I'm not even sure how I feel about John Ross. Where is he, anyway?'

`Seattle'

`Seattle? You want me to go all the way out to Seattle?' Nest was aghast. `I'm in school! I've got classes tomorrow!'

Ariel stared at her in silence, anti suddenly Nest was aware of how foolish she sounded. The tatterdemalion was telling her John Ross was in danger, his life was at risk, she might have a chance to help him, and she was busy worrying about missing a few classes. It was more than that, of course, but it hadn't coarse out sounding that way.

`This is a lot of nonsense!' Pick stormed suddenly, leaping to his feet on her shoulder. `Nest Freemark is needed here, with me! Who knows what could happen to her out there! After what she went through with her father, she shouldn't have to go anywhere!'

`Pick, relax,' Nest soothed.

`Criminy!' Pick was not about to relax. `Why can't the Lady go herself? Why cant she speak to Ross? She's the one who recruited him, isn't she? Why can't she send one of her other people, another Knight, maybe?'

`She has already done all she could' Ariel answered, her strange voice calm and distant, her slight form ephemeral in the changing light. `She has sent others to speak for her. He ignores them all. He is lost to himself, locked away by his choice to abandon his charge, and given over to his doom: Her childlike hand gestured. `There is only Nest'

`Well, she's not going!' Pick declared firmly. `So that's it for John Ross, I guess. Thanks for coming, but I think you'd better be on your way:

`Pick!' Nest admonished, surprised at his vehemence. `Be nice, will you?' She looked at Ariel. `What happens if I don't go?' she asked.

Ariel's strange eyes, dear as stream water, locked on her own. `John Ross has had a dream. The events of the dream will occur in three days. On the last day of October. On Halloween, Ross will be a part of these events. To the extent that he is, there is a very great chance he will become ensnared by the Void and will begin to turn. The Lady cannot know this for certain, but she suspects it. She will not let that happen. She has already sent someone to see that it doesn't'

Nest felt a chill sweep through her. Like she sent Ross to me, five years ago. If Ross is subverted, he will be killed. Someone bas been sent to see to it.

`You are his last chance; Ariel said again. `Will you go to him? Will you speak to him? Will you try to save him?'

Her thin voice drifted on the autumn breeze and was lost in a rustle of dry leaves.

Nest walked back through the park, lost in thought. Pick rode her shoulder in silence. The afternoon was lengthening out from midday, and the park was busy with fall picnickers, hikers, a few stray pickup ballplayers, and parents with kids and dogs. The blue skies were still bright with sunshine, but the sun was easing steadily west toward a large bank of storm clouds that were rolling out of the plains. Nest could smell the coming rain in the soft, cool air.

`What are you going to do?' Pick asked finally.

She shook her head. `I don't know.'

`You're seriously thinking about going, aren't you?'

`I'm thinking about it'

`Well, you should forget about it right here and now'

`Why do you feel so strongly about this?' She slowed in the shadow of a large oak and looked down at him. `What do you know that you're not telling me?'

Pick's wooden face twisted in an expression of distaste, and his twiggy body contorted into a knot. His eyes looked straight ahead. `Nothing:

She waited, knowing from experience that there would be more.

`You remember what happened five years ago,' Pick said finally, still not looking at her. `You remember what that was like with John Ross and your grandparents and your … You remember?` He shook his head. `It wasn't any of it what it seemed to be at first glance. It wasn't any of it what you thought it was. There were things you didn't know. Things I didn't know, for that matter. Secrets. It was over before you found out everything:

He paused. `It will be like that with this business, too. It always is. The Ward doesn't reveal everything. It isn't His nature to do so:

Something was being hidden from her; Pick could sense it, even if he couldn't identify what it was. Maybe so. Maybe it was even something that could hurt her. But it didn't change what was happening to John Ross. It didn't change what was being asked of her. Did she have the right to use it as a reason for not going?

She tried a different tack. Ariel says she will go with me, that she will help me,'

Pick snorted. Ariel is a tatterdemalion. How much help can she be? She's made out of air and lost memories. She's only alive for a heartbeat. She doesn't know anything about humans and their problems. Tatterdemalions come together mostly by chance, wander about like ghosts, and then disappear again. She's a messenger, nothing more'

`She says she can serve as a guide for me. She says that the Lady has sent her for that purpose:

`The blind leading the blind, as your grandmother used to say'

Pick was having none of it.

Nest angled through the trees, bypassing the picnickers and ballplayers, turning up the service road that ran along the backside of the residences bordering the park. Her mind spun in a jumble of concerns and considerations. This was not going to be an easy decision to make.

`Would you come with me?' she asked suddenly.

Pick went still, stiffening. He didn't say anything for a moment, then muttered in a barely audible voice, `Well, the fact of the matter is, I've never been out of the park'

She was surprised, although she shouldn't have been. Why would Pick ever have gone anywhere else? What would have taken him away? The park was his home, his work, his life. He was telling her, without quite speaking the words, that the idea of leaving was frightening to him.

She had embarrassed him, she realised.

`Well, I'm being selfish asking you to go; she said quickly, as if brushing her suggestion aside. `Who would look after the park if you weren't here? It's bad enough that I'm gone so much of the time. But if you left, there wouldn't be anyone to keep an eye on things, would there?'

Pick shook his head quickly. `True enough. No one at all. It's a big responsibility:

She nodded. `Just forget I said anything'

She turned down the service road toward home. Shadows were already beginning to lengthen, the days growing shorter with winter's approach. They spread in black pools from the trees and houses, staining the lawns and roadways and walks. A Sunday type of silence cloaked the park, sleepy and restful. Sounds carried a long way. She could hear voices discussing dinner from one of the houses to her right. She could hear laughter and shouts from off toward the river, down below the bluff where children were playing. She could hear the deep bark of a dog in the woods east.

`I could do this trip in a day and be back,' she said, trying out the idea on him. 'I could fly out, talk to him, and fly right back'

Pick did not respond. She walked down the roadway with him in silence.

She sat inside by herself afterward, staring out through the curtains, thinking the matter over. Clouds masked the sky beyond, and rain was starting to fall in scattered drops. The people in the park had gone home. Lights were beginning to come on in the windows of the houses across Woodlawn Road.

'What should I do?

John Ross had always been an enigma. Now he was a dilemma as well, a responsibility she did not want. He had been living in Seattle far over a year, working for a man named Simon Lawrence at a place called Fresh Start. She remembered both the man and the place from a report someone had done in one of her classes last year. Fresh Start was a shelter for battered and homeless women, founded several years, ago by Lawrence. He had also founded Pass/ Go, a transitional school for homeless children. The success of both had been something of a celebrity cause for a time, and Simon Lawrence had been labelled the Wizard of Oz. Oz, because Seattle was commonly known as the Emerald City. Now John Ross was then?, working at the shelter. So Ariel had informed her.

Nest scuffed at the floor idly with her tennis shoe and tried to picture Ross as a Maanchkin in the employ of the great and mighty Oz.

Oh Carl. What should I do?

She had told Ariel she would think about it, that she would decide by evening. Ariel would return for her answer then.

She got up and walked into the kitchen to make herself a cup of hot tea. As she stood by the stove waiting for the kettle to boil, she glanced over at the real estate papers for the sale of the house. She had forgotten about them. She stared at them, but made no move to pick them up. They didn't seem very important in light of the John Ross matter, and she didn't want to think about them right now. Allen Kruppert and ERA Realty would just have to wait.

Standing at the living room picture window, holding her steaming cup of tea in front of her, she watched the rain begin to fall in earnest, streaking the glass, turning the old shade trees and the grass dark and shiny. The feeders would come out to prowl in this weather, bolder when the light was poor and the shadows thick. They preferred the night, but a gloomy day would do just as well. She still watched for them, not so much afraid anymore as curious, always thinking she would solve their mystery somehow, that she would discover what they were. She knew what they did, of course; she understood their place in nature's scheme. No one else even knew they were out there. But there was so much more–how they procreated, what they were composed of, how they could inflict madness, how they could appear as shadows and still affect things of substance. She remembered them touching her when her father had made her a prisoner in the caves below the park. She remembered the horror and disgust that blossomed within her. She remembered how badly she had wanted to scream.

But her friends and her grandparents had been there to save her, and now only the memory remained.

Maybe it was her turn to be there for John Ross.

Her brow furrowed. No matter how many ways she looked at the problem, she kept coming back to the same thing. If something happened to John Ross and she hadn't tried to prevent it, how could she live with herself? She would always wonder if she might have changed things She would always live in doubt. If she tried and failed. well, at least she would have tried. But if she did nothing …

She sipped at her tea and stared out the window fixedly. John Ross, the Knight of the Word. She could not imagine him ever being different from what he had been five years ago. She could not imagine him being anything other than what he was. How had he fallen so far away from his fierce commitment to saving the world? It sounded overblown when she said it, but that was what he was doing. Saving the world, saving humanity from itself. O'olish Amaneh had made it plain to her that such a war was taking place, even before Ross had appeared to confirm it. We are destroying ourselves, Two Bears had told her; we are risking the fate of the Sinnissippi - that we shall disappear completely and no one will know who we were.

Are we still destroying ourselves? she wondered. Are we still travelling the road of the Sinnissippi? She hadn't thought about it for a long time, wrapped up in her own life, the events of five years earlier behind her, buried in a past she would rather forget. She had been only a girl of fourteen. Her world had been saved, and at the time she had been grateful enough to let it go at that.

But her world was expanding now, reaching out to places and people beyond Hopewell. What was happening in that larger world, the world into which her future would take her? What would become of it without John Ross?

Rain coated the windows in glistening sheets that turned everything beyond into a shimmering haze. The park and her backyard disappeared. The world beyond vanished.

She walked to the phone and dialled Robert Keppler. He answered on the fourth ring, sounding distracted. `Yeah, hello?'

`Back on the computer, Robert?' she asked teasingly.

`Nest?'

`Want to go out for a pizza later?'

`Well, yeah, of course' He was alert and eager now, surprised. `When?'

`In an hour. I'll pick you up. But there's a small price for this'

`What is it?'

`You have to drive me to O'Hare tomorrow morning. I can go whenever you want, and you can use my car. Just bring it back when you're done and park it in the drive'

She didn't know how Ariel would get to Seattle, but she didn't think it was something she needed to worry about. The Lady's creatures seemed able to get around just fine without any help from humans.

She waited for Robert to say something. There was a long pause before he did.

'O'Hare Where are you going?'

`Seattle:

'Seattle?,

'The Emerald City, Robert:

`Yeah, I know what it's called. Why are you going there?'

She sighed and stared off through the window into the rainy gloom. `I guess you could say I'm off to see the Wizard.' She paused for effect. `Bye, Robert:

Then she hung up.

MONDAY, OCTOBER 29