The Warrior Within

2

I woke from the strange dream, still faintly annoyed. I’d been called in to mediate a disagreement between Murdock McKenzie and a giant, and I’d been determined to do the best I could. I’d felt the hostility between them as soon as I sat at the table, and I’d begun speaking soothingly projecting peace and harmony. Suddenly, the hostility had disappeared as if it had never been, and Murdock and the giant were grinning at each other in a brotherly way ignoring me completely. Feeling slightly put out that I’d wasted my time, I’d tried to leave, but the two of them turned quickly and grabbed my arms, forcing me back down in my seat. They turned away from me again and began talking, ignoring me as long as I stayed where I was. Then my annoyance had started to build...

The dream was stupid and meaningless, and it made me mad. I would not have mediated a dispute that Murdock McKenzie was involved in for anything imaginable. In the hopes that he would be destroyed in the resulting war, I would lift not a single finger to help. Pleased with the idea of Murdock McKenzie destroyed, I turned away from the cobalt blue, flounced lace of my bedroom wall dress—directly into Tammad!

“What are you doing in my bed?” I demanded furiously as his arms started to go around me. “Get out of here this minute!”

“The bed is of my belonging,” he answered, grinning faintly at my useless pushing against his chest. “What belongs to what belongs to me is also of my belonging. Have you had your rest?”

“Get out of here!” I repeated desperately, suddenly realizing that I was no longer wearing the sleep suit, and his swim trunks were gone, too ....

“Your hair is long and fine,” he mused, stroking it where it lay down my back. “The other women of your world that I have seen have not such hair. They wear it short so that a man would have difficulty enjoying it. I am pleased that you are not one such.”

“I didn’t do it for you.” I told him, trying to slide down and out of his grasp. “Most of the beings I deal with prefer long hair on a female. It makes my job easier.”

“And your long legs and full breasts and small waist?” he pursued, grabbing a handful of my hair to keep me from sliding down any farther. “Do these, too, make your burdens lighter?”

“At one point, the answer to that would have been yes!” I snarled, doing my best to resist the slow but determined tug on my hair that was pulling me back up to him. “I have a lot of things to see to before I can leave with you, so you’d better let me go if I don’t see to them, I won’t be able to leave on time!”

“All things are done when they are destined to be done,” he murmured, starting to nuzzle me. “A woman must always see first to him to whom she belongs. It is her place to do so.”

“My place is out of this bed!” I insisted, using every ounce of strength trying to get away from him, but his arms seemed to be muscled with steel. He had no trouble holding me where he wanted me, just grinned as he put his hand on me, then laughed at my gasp.

“Your body desires the presence of mine,” he teased, proving the point easily “Your body speaks more truly than your words. It is often thus with a woman, and a man must learn to see beneath the words.”

This time I tried desperately to move his hand away, but he pinned my wrists above my head as he’d done the day before, then proceeded to drive me insane with his fingers. I moaned and squirmed in spite of myself, hating myself for reacting to him, cursing my body for betraying me. No matter what I wanted, my idiot body was obviously aching for his touch. I’d never been that way with a man before, and it made no sense! Didn’t my body know that a civilized man was preferable to a barbarian? That a civilized man would never rape it, never take from it what he wanted? A civilized man would wait to be given, and never simply take!

Tammad the barbarian did not wait to be given. By the time he took me, I would have gladly given him anything, but it wasn’t in his nature to allow that. He took me with strength and sureness, aware that he possessed what was rightfully his. I raged at that thought as my body eagerly accepted his, and then I was drowned beneath a tide of maleness the likes of which I’d known only once before. I floated on the tide an unbelievably long time, but when it rolled out again, I lay panting and abandoned, the sheets rumpled under me, sweat soaking my body. Tammad stretched out beside me, completely satisfied, completely relaxed, and lazily toyed with my hair.

When I’d regained some of my strength, I looked over at him bitterly. He’d gotten what he wanted, and what I wanted simply didn’t matter. He grinned and tugged at my hair and I turned away from him, shame flooding my cheeks. He turned me back to him with little effort, and forced my face up toward his.

“Why does unhappiness continue to find you?” he asked, his voice gentle as his big hand held my face. “I know that this time you had pleasure at my touch, and I do not understand.”

“It’s not in you to understand,” I muttered, unable to move my face away from the sight of him. “I’m not like the women of your world! I’m an individual, a Prime! You have no right to treat me like this!”

“I have the right;” he answered in amusement. “Here—do to me that which I have done to you.”

He let go of me and lay back on the blue and white lace of the pillow cover, tucking his hands behind his head. I stared at him, at the trim, muscled, immovable bulk of him, and snorted.

“How the hell could I?” I demanded, sitting up and brushing my hair back over my shoulders.” Even you could see the difference between us.”

“Then you understand my right,” he said, continuing to lie stretched out. “I am able to do to you that which you cannot do to me. Ability provides the right.”

“I’ve heard that one before.” I said in disgust. “I still don’t subscribe to it, but I’m sure the people of your world do. Especially the men.”

“When was the time you visited my world?” he asked, eyeing me curiously “Which were the areas you traveled through?”

“I’ve never been to your world,” I answered, swallowing the urge to jam the heels of my hands into his unguarded stomach. “If I had the choice, I still wouldn’t be going.”

“But how, then, do you know my language?” He raised up on one elbow to study me. “Also, the customs of my world are familiar to you. Why should this be so?”

“It’s so because it’s part of my job.” I said, looking past him. “I know the languages and customs of every world known to the Amalgamation. When my services are required, there usually isn’t enough time for me to stop for a session with a teaching machine. You probably learned Centran at the embassy on Rimilia while you were waiting for transportation here.”

“You are correct.” He nodded. “I did indeed gain your tongue at the embassy. But if you have never been to Rimilia, there is much left for you to learn. I shall have to teach you the taste of my world.”

“I think the word you wanted was flavor, not taste.” I said, taking my own turn to laugh at him. “But speaking of taste, I’ve just realized that I’m hollow clear to my toes. I’m going to get something to eat.”

I scrambled over his legs to the white-carpeted floor, only then finding what had happened to my sleep suit. I picked it up and put it back on without looking at him, then left the bedroom. My private kitchen was just down the hall, and I got there as fast as I could. The last time I’d eaten was right after the Nervous Nellies Convention, and I’d had indigestion even before I’d started.

The chef, for some reason, was programmed for a dinner meal, so I changed it fast to the breakfast section and pushed the proper buttons. The aroma of lightly fried meela eggs almost killed me as the plate was delivered to the table in front of me, and I followed them rapidly with chemin sandwiches and grilled flatmock. A tall, cold glass of swed washed it all down, and made some room for a wedge of gerite cake. I had almost finished the cake, when I noticed that Tammad stood in the doorway with his arms folded, watching me almost in annoyance.

“You know little of the proper actions of a host,” he said when my eves were on him. “A Rimilian host feeds guest before self. You have not even inquired as to my needs.”

“You’ve been doing so well seeing to your own needs that it didn’t occur to me,” I answered, taking another bite of cake. “Did you really want something to eat?”

“I do,” he said, not moving from his place at the door. He hadn’t dressed again, but it didn’t seem to bother him.

“Then, by all means, help yourself,” I grinned, waving at the chef which he probably didn’t know how to operate. “I’ll be through in a minute, and then I’ll be going to dress. You’ll be able to eat completely undisturbed.”

“It was necessary to do so at the end of the last sun,” he said, coming closer to stand over me. “I felt your anger and your need for solitude and did not intrude upon it. Now the need is no longer with you, and I will have my dimral from your hands.”

I could see his expression clearly and there was no amusement left in his hard, blue eyes. I tried to take another bite of cake, but it wasn’t possible not with him staring at me like that. I put the eating prong down and cleared my throat.

“My chef’s run out of dimral,” I said with a faintness I found unnerving. “What’s your second choice?”

“You know well enough that dimral is meat,” he said stonily. “Any meat will do as well. Produce it now”

His voice was as low as it could be, he hadn’t threatened me in the slightest, yet I hadn’t the least desire to argue with him. I wet my lips with my tongue, turned to the chef, and dialed an extra large portion of roast pimond. The platter of pimond was on the table in no more than fifteen seconds, but Tammad didn’t reach for it. It took another fifteen seconds before I understood, then lifted it in his direction without looking at him.

“Truly, you have much to learn,” he said, taking the plate. “You may now leave to dress yourself.”

I stood quickly, furious that he dared to dismiss me in my own home. He paid no further attention to me, but went to the far wall and crouched down near it with his back toward it, put the plate of pimond on the floor, then raised the meat to his mouth.

“You might try learning to use a chair, barbarian!” I snapped, longing to throw something at that blond, shaggy-haired head. “But have no fear. I’d never think of suggesting a knife and prong. They’re obviously too far beyond you.”

I turned my back on him and strode out, still seething. Slamming my bedroom door helped, and slamming the bathroom door helped even more, but it still wasn’t enough. I walked back and forth a few times while the tub was filling, then climbed in and scrubbed myself briskly and quickly. I toweled down hard, slapped on body lotion, then put my face in the makeup applicator. The applicator was set for Alderanean accent styling, and I was in no mood to change it. I pulled my face out again, checked the black outlining, peach background, and three blood-red diagonal stripes on left cheek in the mirror, then moved to the hairstyler. The styler matched the makeup by piling and curling all of my hair to the right, pointing up the red stripes of high social position. Then, and only then, did I go for clothing.

The Alderanean day suit was a perfect match to my makeup and my mood. I wound the triple-stripe red legging around my right leg, then pulled on the peach and black tunic. The tunic came down to mid-thigh, showing off my figure with a pleasing number of pluses, the high-heeled ankle boots doing nothing to detract from it. I admired myself in the mirror a few moments, went to add filigreed loop earrings, then checked the picture again. This time it was perfect, so I strolled out of the room.

Tammad wasn’t in sight on the upper floor, but I found him down-ramp in my central hall, apparently waiting for something. He rose from his crouch when he saw me, showing he had his swim trunks on again. He studied me intently for a good deal longer than a minute, and what began as a smile ended in a grin.

“Your collat is tempting, woman,” he said, looking down at me with that annoying stare again. “Sorry I am that I must go now to the Sandy Kemper’s house. The Murdock McKenzie has sent clothing for me such as that of your world’s men. I shall take the clothing quickly and return to seek you. See that you do not leave until then.”

He leered at me again then turned away to go through the front door, and I let him go without saying a word as I was totally beyond words. As soon as the door closed I continued down the hall past the front door to my speedster hangar, and climbed into the speedster to warm it up.

“Collat indeed!” I muttered, watching the dials and waiting for the necessary RPMs. As if I would dress myself for the express purpose of tempting him! He had too high an opinion of himself, and it was time he got taken down a peg. As soon as the RPMs met minimum I released the hangar door, rolled out to the landing circle, and took off straight up.

Tallion City was only twenty minutes away, and that’s where I was heading. I leaned back in my seat, piloting manually instead of on automatic, thinking about what Sandy’s quadriwagon had done to the Neighborhood lawn. There had been two straight furrows all the way through the grass from Sandy’s landing strip out in the direction of the service mall. I’d seen them clearly from the air, and the Neighborhood Chairman was bound to see them, too. Sandy would have his head beaten for destroying the lawn, and it couldn’t happen to a more deserving fellow. lf we’d wanted ground traffic in our Neighborhood, we would have put in roads and walkways.

I was blinked into the T.C. traffic pattern and ordered to automatize my destination. Manual flying in Tallion City was prohibited, and for good reason. Out of thousands of people going to hundreds of different places, it’s not unreasonable to expect at least one to experience loss of control. Since even one flyer out of control can kill hundreds of people, flyers flew automatically or not at all. If the flyer itself failed, it was caught in the traffic net that was waiting for it. You can’t expect a traffic control computer to provide for a failing flyer that isn’t meshed into its network.

I was landed easily on my parking building in almost no time at all, took my shoulder bag and left the speedster to be put in its slot, then took the express drop to ground floor. I had a good deal of buying to catch up on, so I dove into it with enthusiasm, but the enthusiasm soon paled. The newest clothing styles were dull and colorless, this year’s furniture was heavy and repelling, and even the jewelry was badly set and lustreless. After hours of wasting my time, I gave up and went to my Neighborhood eating center. I could have gone elsewhere, of course, but after the day I’d had, I was in no mood for inferior courses.

The green and brown room was dim and inviting after the crowds in the buying audiences. People sat companionably at small tables while soft music played, and as I stood still a moment to let my eyes adjust to the lower lighting, I heard my name being called. I peered around through the privacy shimmer-strands, and saw Lenham Phillips coming toward me.

“Terry!” He laughed as he reached me. “It’s hard to believe you’re finally home! Let me offer my table in appreciation of that breathtaking outfit. It will make the food taste so much better.”

“Len Phillips.” I smiled fondly. “As big a liar as ever, but welcome in spite of that. How have you been doing?”

“Not badly,” he said, taking my arm and leading me to his table. “Not as well as you, my dear Prime, but not at all badly. How was Dremmler’s sector?”

“Don’t remind me!” I grimaced, taking a chair opposite his. His gray street suit fit well on his athletic body, his smile making his dark-blond handsomeness even more attractive. “Dremmler’s sector probably has the hardest heads and densest minds in the entire Amalgamation. Just pray that you never have to mediate there. It isn’t even worth a class-one vacation leave.”

“That’s a matter of opinion.” He laughed, taking my hand in both of his. “From now on, we’re going to have to do something about our timing. You just got back, and I have to leave tonight. All that gives us is this afternoon. Will you go to a real with me?”

At first the idea wasn’t very appealing, but then I changed my mind. “Why not?” I asked lightly. “Being with a civilized man is just what I need.”

“I should hope so,” he said with raised eyebrows, watching as I chose my meat from the table’s chef. “Have you been spending much time with any other sort?”

“Not really.” I laughed. “It’s just that being away from Central makes me colicky. I’ll be fine as soon as I’m back in the swing of things.”

“I’m sure of it.” He smiled. “I saw Jan the other day and she made a point of asking if I’d seen The Terror lately. She said if I did, I was to be sure to insist that you call her.”

“With her temper, she has a nerve calling me The Terror,” I muttered, moving in the gold, deep-cushioned chair in annoyance. “I don’t know who she picked it up from.”

“I do,” he grinned, “but I think it would be more diplomatic if I kept it to myself. I don’t want you walking out on me before we get to the real.”

“I’d better not pursue that,” I decided, watching the sauteed valmin I’d ordered being slid to the table in front of me. “In the mood I’m in, walking out would be more of a certainty than a risk.”

He patted my hand in appreciation, then turned to his own food. We ate in companionable silence until we were through, then left to find a real.

“I know just the one,” Len said as we moved down the slidewalk. “Guy and Vera experienced it, and couldn’t rave about it enough. It’s a double, or I would have gone on my own before this. How does that sound?”

“I suppose it’ll do.” I said grudgingly “I have no preferences one way or the other.”

“Fine,” he said. “It’s just off the walk at Bend Five. Looks like we’re almost there.”

We had just passed Bend Four, so we moved to the edge of the walk, then stepped off at Bend Five. A discreet “R” on the front of the building before us told us that we were in the right place, and a greeter opened the door for us with a welcoming smile.

“Step this way, please,” he invited warmly, then closed the door behind us. “Do you prefer group or private experiencing?”

“Private,” Len answered, handing over a large block of Earning Pluses. The EP’s were taken by the greeter, a guide was summoned, and we were led to a small cream-colored room with two light-gold couches.

“Gentleman to the left, lady to the right,” the guide instructed us. “Press the contacts in place as soon as you’re settled. If you need any assistance, activate the button on either couch. Have a pleasant experience.”

He closed the door behind him, and Len smiled at me. “You seem to be right, as usual, Terry. I suppose it’s my lot in life to be left. Shall we?”

“One more comment like that and you will be left:” I winced as I followed him to the couches. “What’s the title of this electrifying experience?”

“It’s called, ‘Tree World Adventure’,” Len said, leaning over the light-gold console in front of his couch. “You like trees, don’t you, Terry?”

“I’m mad about them.” I answered with a small, unvoiced groan, lying down on my couch. “I may never speak to Guy and Vera again.”

“You won’t be the only one,” he agreed as he reached for his headset. “Now let’s coordinate.”

We made ourselves comfortable on the couches, prepared the contacts, then pressed the headsets in place on the count of three. All outside sensation cut off immediately, then I found myself standing alone in a large clearing surrounded by giant trees. I knew I had just landed my disabled ship on the planet, expecting to find a research base where I might find help, but the only clearing where the base might have been found was entirely deserted.

I looked around at the trees again, hoping for some sign of the base or its personnel, and suddenly felt that I wasn’t alone. I was being watched from somewhere, and the thought made me shiver.

I turned to go back to my ship, running slightly to get there faster. I might not be able to fly the ship, but at least it was shelter. I’d close the airlock and stay inside, and hope that my S.O.S reached someone before my supplies ran out. I knew I would never be able to go into that forest for food.

I was almost to the foot of the ship’s ramp, when I screamed and stopped dead in my tracks. A man who looked just like Len was there, but it was a Len I had never known. He was unbelievably big and well muscled, wearing not a single stitch of clothing. I screamed again and cringed away from him, but he was on me in a flash. He threw me to the ground and over on my face, then bound my hands behind my back. I screamed for help, pleaded for mercy but it was all wasted breath. I was lifted to a wide, brawny shoulder, and carried against my will into that dreaded, brooding forest.

We went a long way through the trees, and I was quickly disoriented. My captor seemed to know exactly where he was going, stopping at long last before one of the mile-high trees. There was very little light, but he had no difficulty in finding his way about. His arms worked past my dangling legs, and then I was completely frozen with fear- he was climbing a rope or something up into the tree!

I hardly dared breathe while he climbed, for fear he would drop me or lose his grip and plunge us both to the ground. I kept my eyes squeezed tightly shut, praying to my Maker that I would survive the climb, and eventually my prayers were answered. He stood at last on a wide, long branch, and then moved closer to the tree trunk. In another minute we were inside the tree trunk, and I looked around with shock at a hollowed-out room. It wasn’t very big, but it was shelter without doubt, and the man threw me down near the wall at the very back of the room-cave.

He left me to go outside again, and I whimpered and pulled at the rope on my wrists. It was impossible to loosen it, but even if I had, there was nowhere for me to go. I’d never be able to climb down the way he had come up, and even if I miraculously found myself whole, untied, and on the ground, I would still be hopelessly lost. I was doomed to depend on the mercy of the man who had found me, and could only hope that he had mercy within him.

The man appeared again in the doorway causing me to gasp with fright. He came closer to stare down at me as I lay shivering, then he bent and said something in a harsh, guttural, totally unintelligible language.

“I don’t understand you,” I whispered to him. “Please don’t hurt me! Please have mercy!”

Anger creased his features, and he slapped me hard across the face, pulled my head back by the hair, and repeated his original demand.

“I don’t know what you want!” I screamed, terror strong within me. My cheek blazed hot where he’d struck me, my hair was being torn from my head, and I was at the mercy of a man who had no mercy.

He snarled angrily and shook my head by the hair, then released my hair. My relief was very short-lived, though, as the next thing he did was pull at my clothes. I was so petrified I couldn’t speak, but could only hope that my clothing would keep him from me. My hopes were as doomed as I, poor girl, for my clothing resisted being opened, but could not resist his tearing fingers. It was torn completely from me, and I lay before him, naked and entirely helpless.

I begged him not to take me, not to make me his body slave, but he would not have listened even had he understood. He was brutal in his pleasure, brutal and complete. He caused me agony with deliberation, and I could do nothing but I sat blinking on the couch, the contacts in my right hand, trying to shake off the last lingering effects of the real. I took a deep breath and looked over at Len, but he was still deep within the experience. His arms were bent at the elbows and his fingers were flexing, his body bumped up and down in a rhythm, and his face showed cruel, determined excitement.

I tossed the contacts back onto the console and stood up. The totally alien emotions the real had forced me to feel had also enabled me to break out of the experience. I was furious with Len for having brought me there, but I knew exactly why he had done it. He wanted the experience of humbling me, of making me a cringing slave, expecting the experience to stay with me long enough for him to take me physically in a master-slave way after the real had ended. Chances are that he would have succeeded, too, since reals cling to you for some time after their completion. If they complete. I took my shoulder bag from the floor near the couch, then headed for the door. I’d joined Len long enough in the real for him to be able to complete on his own. His frustrations would begin when completion found him all alone in the room.

The greeter stared at me curiously as I left, but naturally made no move to stop me. I stood outside the building for a time, watching people go by on the sidewalk, feeling a deep dissatisfaction that I couldn’t trace. All those months in the conference rooms in Dremmler’s sector had made me eager to be back on Central, but now that I was here, I wondered what it was that I’d missed. I finally shrugged it off, really looked around me, then made for Verasten Hardy’s place.

Vera enjoyed city life more than she cared for suburban living, so she had opted for an apartment in her original Neighborhood’s residential area in Tallion City. Some people maintained both house and apartment, but Vera didn’t want a house and I didn’t want an apartment, so we generally called one another if either of us had need of the other’s location. Vera’s apartment was all on one level, with the private living quarters behind the visitors’ rooms rather than above them, and Vera herself opened the door to me, then squealed in surprise.

“Terry, darling, I don’t believe it!” she gushed. “You’ve been gone absolutely forever! Do come in and tell me all about your marvelous adventures, I’m just dying to hear.”

I let her bustle me into her guest room, fighting back a grimace when I saw that her apartment had been redecorated with this year’s furniture. There were five heavy, dark blue chairs, two heavy dark pink couches, three low, hideously carved tables, a monstrously large, overdecorated hutch, and acres of thick, blue and pink patterned drapes on the windows. It took something of an effort, but I sat on one of the couches and smiled at her.

“Vera, love, your taste is always up to the minute. Do be a dear and save my life for me. I’m just dying for a glass of port Winsen.”

“Of course.” She laughed over her shoulder as she crossed the room. “I’ll have a glass with you. How long have you been back?”

“Only a few days.” I answered, watching her pour two glasses of port at the hutch. She carried them back to the couch, handed me one, then sat down beside me. “Has anything exciting been happening, or is it all the same as it was?”

“Most things don’t change.” She shrugged, sipping her port. “Jan has taken up with Rodmil Holper, and you’ll never guess why. But that reminds me. I’d better warn you before it’s too late.”

“Before what’s too late?” I asked in amusement, drinking my own port as she put hers down. “Vera, you always sound like the warning before crisis.”

“This time I am!” she insisted. “I just wish someone had warned me. There’s a new real around that you have to avoid at all costs. I’ve never had such a shattering experience!”

“You couldn’t possibly mean `Tree Planet Adventure’?” I asked with only a slight edge to my voice. “If so, you’re a little late. I just left there, and as a matter of fact, Len said you and Guy recommended it.”

“Maybe Guy did, but I never would,” she stated, then lifted her glass again to drain it. “On second thought, I’m sure Guy recommended it. Terry, it was unbelievable! How is it you’re here now if you just experienced it?”

“I didn’t complete the experience.” I grinned. “I’d like to see Len’s face when be emerges and finds that I’m gone.”

“So would I,” she said savagely, her dark eyes lighting in a way that made me uneasy “I’d also like to see Guy in the same fix. He trapped me into it, Terry, and I completed the experience. When it was over I tried to throw it off, but I couldn’t. I spent three days at his place, serving him on my knees, kissing him for every slap, thanking him for abusing me, before I could break out of it. Rod took Jan a week ago, and she hasn’t broken out of it yet. The thing should be declared illegal.”

“It probably already has been.” I assured her. “That was a real house I’d never been to before, and I’m sure it’s temporary and restricted, but they just ‘forgot’ to ask if I was willing. The most that could happen would be a fine for the house, and a warning for its owner. It’s too effective a real to be suppressed.”

“I’ll say it’s effective.” She grimaced, a hand to her throat. “I still quiver at the thought of Guy. I’ve managed to avoid him since I escaped from his apartment, but I have the awful feeling that if he walked in right now I’d go to my knees in front of him, let him tie my wrists behind me, then follow him back to his apartment. I’ve been afraid to go out since I got back.”

Vera sat staring into space, her eyes wide and frightened, her left hand clenched in her lap. She was on the verge of losing herself to her fears, and it wasn’t an attractive sight.

“Why don’t you take a trip?” I suggested, pitying her more than I cared to show. “I’m sure that a month or two away from here will make all the difference, and you’ll come back just as you used to be.”

“That’s a good idea,” she agreed shakily, brushing at her lavender-tinted hair. She wore lavender and red makeup, offsetting a purple-shaded house suit that hung loosely on her, and then her suddenly visibly weary eyes were resting on me again. “You couldn’t use a house guest for a while, could you?”

I was almost tempted to accept her partial plea, but then I remembered what I had left at home.

“Unfortunately, I already have one.” I told her, emptying my glass. “A colleague from Dremmler’s sector, visiting Central for the first time. He’s unbelievably backward, but I’m stuck with him, at least until we leave for the mediation assignment I’ve just been given. He’s coming along to see if he can learn anything.”

Her expression changed then, and it was an expression I’d never seen before. “I really envy you,” she said wistfully staring at me with surprising longing. “Here you are, a PXM with a wonderful career, and here am I useless at everything. After serving my required year with Central central, I’d hoped they would ask me to continue, but they never did. I just wasn’t good enough. I have everything I need now but a purpose in life.”

She was staring down at her hands in a way that left me shaken, but it wasn’t something I could show. “Come now, it’s not that bad!” I encouraged heartily, patting her knee. “There are many things to do if you look about you. We’ll get together again before I leave, and I’ll help you choose something. Right now, it’s getting late and I’d better be on my way”

“Wouldn’t you like another port?” she asked in a hopeful tone as I stood up. “We could talk about old times and who’s doing what now.”

I begged off and left as fast as possible, feeling worse than I had before I’d arrived. I’d never known that Vera was so unhappy and it was very unsettling. I hated to admit it, but the only composed person on Central seemed to be Murdock McKenzie!

It was dusk before I was back in my speedster, heading for home. I put it on automatic and leaned back, thinking about what was waiting for me. After this long a time, the barbarian should have realized that I was an individual to be dealt with, not a servant to be ordered about. If he expected my help with his problem, he’d have to treat me with respect and consideration. I stirred in my seat harness, knowing how fine it was going to be pointing this out to him, watching him compose himself for a sincere apology. After a time, I might even forgive him. His problem was an interesting one, and the professional in me was attracted by it in spite of Murdock McKenzie’s underhanded methods. I would handle the problem well, and never let Murdock forget that he’d had to come to Mediation for his solution.

In just a few minutes’ time, I set down on my landing-circle and rolled inside the hangar. The door closed securely behind me as the engine whined down to the shut-off point, so I secured all controls, got out, then ambled into the house. The ground floor was deserted, and that was just as well. I hadn’t had dinner yet, and I was beginning to be hungry I went upramp to the living floor, intending to visit my kitchen, but Tammad suddenly stepped out of my bedroom into my path. I stopped short to keep from running into him, and gave him a pleasant smile.

“So there you are, l’lenda,” I murmured as I brushed at my tunic skirt. “I trust you’ve had enough time to do an adequate amount of thinking?”

“Indeed I have,” he answered with a nod, folding his arms. “The day has fled in the time of your absence.”

His expression wasn’t quite as anxious as it should have been, but that was surely because I hadn’t explained matters to him as yet.

“True enough.” I agreed. “I’m sure you now realize that I’m not to be trifled with. If you expect me to...”

“I expect you to obey my word,” he snapped, rudely interrupting me. “On Rimilia, it could mean your life! I shall have to teach you proper respect for him to whom you belong, lest this ever happen again. In the room!”

His broad face showed anger as he pointed toward the bedroom, but I couldn’t believe it. He was treating me, a Prime, as if I were a nobody!

“How dare you speak to me that way” I gasped, moving a small step backward. “Don’t you realize...?”

“Woman, in the room!” he repeated, taking me by the neck and propelling me through the doorway then following behind. “Too long have you lived among these nonmen, these darayse. They know nothing of the training of women for their place, but I have not that lack. Should you ever think upon disobeying me again, your fate will be well known to you!”

I stumbled from the push, nearly losing my balance, and felt shocked as I never had been in my life. I didn’t know what the barbarian was talking about, but I knew it wasn’t right. Couldn’t he see that he needed my help badly? That if he mistreated me, my help might not be forthcoming? I tried to explain that to him, but he refused to listen. He pushed me over to the bed, then picked up what looked like a long, thin tree branch.

“You were bidden not to leave the house,” he explained in his calm, even way the anger frighteningly showing behind the calm. “Because you were not aware of the consequences of disobedience, your punishment will be less harsh than it otherwise would be. You are not to disobey me again.”

I was wide-eyed and confused, determined not to tremble before the likes of a barbarian, but then he pushed me face down on the bed, putting one of his knees in the small of my back. I struggled to get away from him, fought to squirm loose, but his weight held me in the place with no other effort necessary from him. He stripped the triple-red legging from me and threw it aside, then tucked up my tunic skirt. I was wild with the thought of what be would do to me, and then it happened! He brought the thin, springy branch down hard across my hips, leaving a streak of fire in its wake! I’d never felt anything like it before, and I screamed with the pain, but it was just the beginning. He beat me with the branch, across my hips and thighs, until I cried wildly for him to stop, but he continued on as if he intended destroying me. When my tears ran my makeup down to the bed in a stream, he finally stopped and took his knee from my back.

“Your place will become more familiar to you as time passes,” he said over my sobs. “I shall do my best to teach you the—flavor of my world, The Murdock McKenzie has sent you writings which you are to study. Do so now”

He stepped away came back to drop a pile of report folders near me, then went to the other end of the bed and lay down. The sobs racked my body the pain of the beating burned at me unceasingly, yet I took the first folder and opened it. If I hadn’t, he might have beaten me again.

I was able to make out that the report dealt with the situation on Rimilia. Although I learned nothing I hadn’t already known, I read it all the way through, then went to the second report. I ached even without trying to move, and felt bewildered and afraid and all alone. For the first time in my life I’d been beaten, and it had been a horrible, alien experience.

The second report contained the statements of those who had gone to Rimilia, and it was their unanimous opinion that Tammad needed nothing more than some expert help in negotiation in order to deal with the other barbarian leaders. The conclusion almost set me sniffling again, because he hadn’t needed any help in dealing with me!

When I put the second report aside, Tammad abruptly stood up from the bed. “I would have my dimral now, woman,” he said with that same, unruffled calm. “You may finish those others later.”

I didn’t look at him, but raised myself painfully from the bed and followed along behind him to my kitchen. He stood aside as I went to the chef and dialed another portion of pimond, then he took the plate I handed him. I turned back to the chef for my own dinner, but his hand was on my arm.

“The writings have not been completed,” he told me. “Go you now and see to them.”

I stared at him for a minute, seeing the unyielding decision on his face, then went miserably back to my bedroom. He wasn’t angry any longer, but I wasn’t to be allowed to eat until I had his permission. The tears started again even before I lay down, making the third report one large blur. I cried and tried to stop crying, peered and tried to begin reading, but it was all too much. I cried and cried, then cried myself to sleep.