The Trouble With Demons

Chapter 32

It was bright and sunny on the Fortune. It was edging toward late afternoon, so the sun had finished baking the wooden decks for the day, and a cooling breeze was coming off the harbor. I was sitting on a bench, working on my third ale, or was it my fourth? I hadn’t bothered to keep count. I’d hauled the small keg up on deck with me to save myself the walk down to the galley, though now it’d probably be more like a stagger.

I’d left Mychael’s office feeling confident enough, but the closer I got to the Fortune, the more my enthusiasm started to wane under the weight of reality. Carnades wouldn’t stay at home forever, Markus would make his move soon, Sarad Nukpana’s soul was out body shopping, Rudra Muralin was in the goblin embassy plotting my death, and the Reapers could find me anytime, anywhere.

Then there was Mychael and Tam-and me with Mychael and Tam. So far I hadn’t had any time to really consider the consequences of our predicament, and I’d been avoiding to the point of denial the fact that a large segment of goblin society considered me married to both of them. Part of me rather liked the idea and felt deliciously naughty about the whole arrangement. The other part of me went with a time-honored Benares solution-if I drank enough, my problems would go away, probably along with my consciousness, but I’d deal with that when I found myself facedown on the deck.

And all of my problems and predicaments were courtesy of a fist-sized, soul-sucking rock.

Where I was sitting, anyone who wanted to spy on me-or take their best shot-could do so to their heart’s content. I didn’t care about that, either, and cared less after each tankard. Vegard and Arlyn had strongly suggested that the safe place for me to do my drinking would be belowdecks. I strongly refused, and in emphatic and colorful terms told them that I was staying precisely where I was and that I wanted to be left alone. They were still on deck with me, but guarding me from a respectful distance. If I fell over-either from ale or a crossbow bolt-I was sure they’d pick me up. I took another long drink. I knew I was behaving like an ass, and I’d have to apologize to them later, but for now I wanted sun on my face and a keg by my side.

I’d never been good with feelings. Don’t get me wrong; I was on a first-name basis with fear and anger, but feelings of the romantic kind… Well, let’s just say our paths hadn’t crossed that often. I’ve never been what you’d call datable. When a man found out my last name was Benares, all I had to do was watch his face and know how that relationship was going to go-or not go. It was all in the eyes; they either bugged out in sheer terror, or narrowed in anticipatory greed. Unfortunately, there wasn’t much of a middle ground.

Mychael and Tam were two notable exceptions.

So far all my romantic encounters with Mychael had been for diverting enemy attention, for healing, or for relief that I wasn’t dead-at least those were his excuses. But after what he’d said, not said, and implied in his office a few hours ago, I had the feeling that Mychael’s excuses were turning into intentions. And regardless of what Vegard said, or Mychael might think, or I might want, the top lawman in the seven kingdoms could hardly get involved with a member of the top criminal family. Talk about a career-destroying move. Though with the Saghred involved, career-destroying was also life-threatening. But that hadn’t stopped me from pondering some intentions of my own. What had happened when he’d touched me wasn’t a feeling or a sensation; it was an experience of the once-in-a-lifetime kind. And I’d already been treated to it twice in two days.

Then there was Tam. I knew what Tam wanted from me-the same thing he’d wanted since the night we’d met. And during the time that I’d known him, those black, bedroom eyes of his made sure I didn’t forget it. I was pretty sure his feelings for me went beyond what would no doubt be an amazing time in bed-or on the floor, in the tub, or against the wall-I just didn’t know how far those feelings went, and Tam hadn’t seen fit to tell me. And in any romantic encounters with Tam, my good sense had left the room. Tam could do that to a woman, and he certainly did that to me. Then there was Tam’s past. Normally a man’s past wouldn’t bother me, as long as it stayed in the past where it belonged. But Tam’s notoriety, indiscretions, sins, and assorted crimes weren’t just chasing him, they were catching up.

Two gorgeous, sexy, dangerous, and downright delicious men. And now the Saghred was playing matchmaker for me with both of them, making it a bad situation with even worse timing, and I didn’t even want to think about the ending. But what if we got rid of the rock, and the bonds, and no one was trying to arrest and/or kill us anymore? What if it was just Tam and me, or Mychael and me? What would I do then? And who would I want to be doing it with?

I drained my tankard and reached for the keg’s tap.

“You might want to rethink that,” Sora Niabi suggested. “Or at least admit the reason for it.”

The demonologist was standing close enough to talk, but far enough away not to get hit with anything I might possibly throw in her direction. Apparently she’d seen her share of mean drunks in her time.

I bristled. “Why?”

“Draining that keg isn’t going to make whatever’s wrong any better, and pickling your brain never helps anything.”

“So you’ve never gotten pickled?”

She let out a snort of a laugh. “Plenty of times. I hunt demons for a living.”

“Since you’re here, does that mean the demon hunt’s over?”

“It does.”

“Wanna join me?”

“Love to.”

I looked around, seeing nothing but my tankard and one keg. “We’ll have to get-”

Sora flashed a grin and pulled a dinted metal mug from her robes. “I always carry my own.”

“That’s convenient.”

“And ensures I never go thirsty.”

Sora sat down on the deck next to the keg, filled her mug, and with a sore and weary sigh, slowly eased back against the mainmast.

“There’s plenty of room on the bench,” I told her.

“I’m good right where I am.” Sora took a long drink and nodded appreciatively. “A fine brew. My compliments to your cousin.”

I pushed on the tap and started refilling my tankard. “Phaelan thinks a happy crew is a loyal crew.”

“This would certainly help. And you’re sitting here getting yourself happy because…?”

“I’m scared and I’m confused, and I’m overwhelmed by what I’m scared of and confused about.”

Sora’s brow creased in concentration. “That almost made sense.”

“Thank you.”

“And will emptying that keg make you any less confused, scared, and overwhelmed?”

“No, but-”

“Let’s see… One, you’re alive. And considering present circumstances, you used up half a dozen miracles making that one happen. Two, so you’ve got people after you.” She dismissively waved her hand. “They’re all assholes.”

“Powerful assholes,” I reminded her. I think my words were starting to slur.

Sora took another healthy swig. “All that means is they can blow more gas.”

I had to laugh, even though it hurt my head. “I don’t think Carnades blows gas.”

“You’re right. Too tight-assed.” She paused with a knowing grin. “Third, and the main reason you’re trying to drown yourself in a keg, you’ve got man problems.”

I saw no reason to deny it. “On top of all my others. And it’s not a man problem-it’s a men problem.”

Sora nodded. “Ah. Let me guess-two men, one you, and a lot of confusion in between. Seen it before.”

“Not like this, you haven’t. And it’s not like I’ve had time to sit around and make a list of pros and cons.”

“You don’t need a list. What’s your gut tell you?”

I grimaced and burped. “That I should have stopped two tankards ago.” I leaned forward and dropped my face into the hand not holding the ale. “And being anywhere near me is going to get them both killed.”

“Both meaning Mychael Eiliesor and Tamnais Nathrach?”

“That would be them.” My words were muffled against my hand.

“First of all, I’d like to congratulate you on some damn fine taste in men.”

“Thank you.”

“So you’re saying that you’re not interested in either one of them?”

I lifted my head and regretted it. “I’m saying that I can’t be.”

“You can tell yourself that until you’re blue in the face.” She indicated my ale mug. “Or in your case, throbbing in the head. All the ale on this island isn’t going to change how you feel here.” She took the hand that wasn’t holding her mug and poked herself twice in the center of her chest. I think she was swaying, or maybe it was me. “I take it that’s the source of your confusion?”

“Uh-huh.” I couldn’t tell her that it was also the source of my fear. Sora didn’t know about the Saghred’s foray into match-making, and it was safer for her if she stayed that way. Sometimes, ignorance wasn’t just bliss, it was survival. But I could tell her about Mychael’s excuses turning into intentions, and Tam’s lust turning into… well, serious lust and more. My love life had been mostly famine, but soon I might be confronted with a feast-and a choice.

I told her, and she listened.

“Being a demonologist gives you a certain perspective on life,” Sora told me. “I went up against I don’t know how many demons in that dark hall, with nothing but a handful of backup and half a dozen old and overused demon traps. By the way, that backup was some of your uncle’s crew.”

“I saw.”

“When you and Captain Benares went missing, the commodore went to Mychael and demanded to help find you. The paladin and I knew where you were by that time, and with the Guardians protecting the students, I needed some strong backs to haul in my big-ass demon traps.”

“Looked like a coffin to me.”

Sora flashed a grin. “For a demon, that’s what they are. My own invention. Once we got them spaced out around the Assembly outer hall, we opened them up and sucked the bastards right off the face of the earth.”

“So what kept us from getting sucked in?”

“Shields and the fact that you’re not a demon.”

I chuckled and shook my head, slowly this time. “Some would say that’s open for debate.”

“Earlier models couldn’t tell the difference between demon and mortal.” She paused and looked a little embarrassed. “Design flaw.”

“That’s some flaw.”

“Especially to the poor demonologist who got sucked in there with them; I had a hell of a time getting him out. Your uncle’s crews hauled the traps in and then stayed to pose as lunch to lure the demons into range. Your Uncle Ryn and his officers took on a pack of Volghuls that arrived before we were ready to start the party.” Sora smiled fondly. “The demons were actually afraid of your uncle. He and his crew are a fine bunch of men.”

Now that was something Uncle Ryn and his crew had never been called. But I had to agree with Sora, any man who’d act like demon food, even for a few seconds, was worthy of any and all kinds of admiration.

“Your family’s good people, Raine.”

“They’re pirates.”

“Doesn’t mean they’re not good people.”

I smiled. Sora was good people, too. “All of your students are okay?” I asked.

Sora’s smile spread into a grin of fierce pride. “Every last one of them. And after what some of my grad students did in the Assembly, they’ll be graduating with honors. Two of them didn’t have the best grades in their class, but exam scores don’t mean shit when you’ve got a ten-foot-tall demon trying to have you for a snack. It’s what those two kids did to that demon that mattered. I’m proud of my students.” She looked me squarely in the eyes. “And having demons trying to eat you reminds you real quick what’s important and which things just don’t matter. It seems that our fine paladin’s acknowledging that he has some strong feelings for you. And I gather that you’ve known for some time how Nathrach felt. And you telling them that you can’t be with either one of them won’t do a damned thing to change their minds once they’ve made them up.” Her dark eyes sparkled appreciatively. “In case you haven’t noticed-and I’m sure you have-our paladin is a grown man.”

I raised my tankard in salute. “Noticed that many times.”

“And before Talon enrolled in the college, Tamnais Nathrach dropped by my office for a talk. Likewise, a grown man-a very well-grown man. And since they’re both big boys, they don’t need anyone to protect them from their choices-especially the woman it seems they’ve set their sights on.”

“No one’s set their sights on me.”

“I study demons, Raine. But deep down, I’m a hunter. I recognize my own kind. Mychael and Tamnais are hunters to their core.” She smiled slowly. “From what you tell me, and from what I’ve heard on my own, they’ve deemed you worthy of pursuit.” Her dark eyes twinkled. “Girl, you’d better watch your back. Though you might have more fun if you didn’t.”

“Sora, I’m trouble to my core. I don’t want them to die because of me.”

“Because you love them, or at least that’s the direction you’re heading. If you won’t say it, I will.”

“I don’t know what I-”

“Yes, you do. You’re just too stubborn-or afraid-to admit it yet.”

I didn’t answer. I didn’t have to; we both knew what that answer would be.

“Your not wanting them to die because of you won’t change how they feel,” she said. “The only thing you have to decide is what you’re going to do about it. Personally, when a class twelve demon finally catches me with no spells, no trap, and no hope in hell, I don’t want to have any regrets. How about you?”

I leaned forward and rested my elbows on my knees, letting my tankard dangle loosely from my hand, and stared down at the deck. As paladin, Mychael faced death every day. As a former member of the Mal’Salin family, Tam knew that death was hot on his heels right now. Both of them lived their lives like that, and they enjoyed living. I knew for a fact that Tam didn’t let anything get in the way of his having a good time. Yes, knowing me could get them both killed; it could get us all killed. But if they could live like that, so could I.

I raised my head-slowly this time-and grinned up at Sora. “You’re right. You’re absolutely right.”

Sora shrugged. “It happens from time to time. Though I can’t blame you for tying one on; you’ve literally been to Hell and back.”

I sat up straight and looked out over the harbor. The sun was lower in the sky. It’d be setting in about an hour; it looked as if it was going to be a beauty, and I was going to be sitting right here to enjoy it.

“I can’t let what might or might not happen keep me from living my life,” I said. “And I have no right whatsoever to tell anyone else how to live theirs-or how to feel. I won’t let Carnades and men like him ruin however long any of us have left.” I looked down in my mug; it was about half full. I set down beside me. “I’m done. I need what wits I’ve got left intact.” I sighed and grimaced. “I’ve got some thinking to do, but first I’ve got a rock to destroy.”

“Beautiful women getting drunk,” Phaelan said from behind me. “Mind if I join you?”

“Pull up another keg, Captain,” Sora told him. “This one’s about empty.”

“Is my cousin regaling you with stories about her exploits with the demon queen?”

Sora stretched her legs out, crossing them at the ankles. “I haven’t heard that one.”

I shot Phaelan an exasperated look. “Because there’s nothing to tell.”

“Nothing to tell? It was the best part of the whole day. Well, next to what I got to do.” He lowered his voice and grinned slowly. “But that’s highly classified information.” He winked at Sora. “Mine was more satisfying, but what Raine did trumped it for sheer entertainment value.”

I snorted. “For you.”

“Let’s let the professor decide. Raine started a catfight with the demon queen,” Phaelan said gleefully.

Soras’s brown eyes went wide. “A what?” Then she started to laugh. “Please tell me he’s kidding.”

“Afraid not.”

Phaelan chortled. “Two beautiful women, one of them naked, both rolling around on the ground. What’s not to enjoy?”

“That was insane,” Sora told me, incredulous.

I shrugged. “I know; but sometimes insanity works.”

“You won?”

“Not really.”

“You’re here; she’s not.”

“Uh, that was Tam’s doing.” I made a slashing motion across my throat. “With one of the Guardians’ green demon blades.”

“That’d certainly do it. But you attacked her?”

“Yeah, I did.”

“With her bare hands,” Phaelan chimed in.

“Hey, I had a reason. I had to get the Scythe.”

Sora’s brow furrowed. “I don’t think I’ve read or heard of anyone attacking the queen of demons before.”

“She did seem kind of surprised,” I admitted.

Phaelan draped an arm around my shoulders. “When word of this gets around, do you have any idea how this is going to enhance the family reputation? The one who isn’t even in the family business kicked the demon queen’s shapely ass.”

I raised a brow. “Shapely?”

It was Phaelan’s turn to shrug. “Call ’em as I see ’em. And thanks to you, I got to see everything.” His grin turned seven times wicked. “And with all that rolling around, I got to see everything at least twice. I’ve never been more proud to call you my cousin.”

I felt a presence brush my skin like fingertips. I stood, Phaelan’s voice fading into the background. I knew he was there before I could see him. I walked over to the railing and looked down at the dock.

Tam was standing alone, no dark mage hit squad, just him. His cloak blew back to reveal leathers and at least one blade at his hip. I was sure there were more. No battle braid contained his hair. It was down and blowing in the evening breeze. Sora was right; I had some damned fine taste in men.

Phaelan stepped up behind me.

“Permission to come on board, Captain Benares?” Tam asked formally.

Phaelan blew his breath out through his nose. He wasn’t going to like it, but he was going to do it-for me. “Permission and welcome,” he called out.

“Thank you,” I whispered.

He smiled faintly. “Who am I to judge?”

Sora nodded in greeting to Tam and then went to join Vegard and Arlyn. Tam sat on the bench next to me. I leaned back against the mainmast.

Tam glanced down at the keg. “You’ve been drinking.”

“Extensively.”

“May I ask why?”

“You can’t guess?”

Tam didn’t say a word as his dark eyes gazed out over the harbor. “Piaras’s ceremony went well?” That was one thing you could always count on with a goblin-when a topic wasn’t to their liking, they’d change it.

“It was perfect,” I told him.

“I’m glad; he deserves it. I would have liked to have been there, but…”

“The three of us together in a room full of Conclave mages isn’t the best idea right now,” I finished for him.

I didn’t need to say out loud who was the third one of “us.” Heck, with our umi’atsu bond, Tam and I didn’t have to talk out loud at all. But to use the bond would be to acknowledge it. Until we could do something about breaking that bond, denial was working just fine for me.

“People could see us here,” Tam said.

“I don’t give a damn who sees us.”

“You might tomorrow.”

“Then I’ll deal with it-and with them-tomorrow. You came here alone,” I said accusingly. “Anyone could have seen you, or worse.” I stopped and cringed. Way to go Raine. The demons probably ate his dark mage school buddies; he doesn’t have any guards anymore, and you just-

“Four of them are recovering at Sirens,” Tam said, plucking my thoughts like grapes. “The rest stayed there to protect them and Talon.” His face was set like stone. “If anyone had attacked me on my way here, they would have paid dearly for the privilege.”

I didn’t doubt that.

“Raine,” Tam said quietly. “Dark magic will always be a part of who I am.”

“I know. Even if I could pound the Saghred into dust right now, what it’s given me will always be with me, too.”

We sat for a while without speaking, in an awkward yet companionable silence. The Fortune rocked gently beneath us as the tide came in.

Tam shifted slightly and laid his hand on the mast’s smooth wood. “Remember the last time we were here together?”

Like I could have forgotten. Now there was a good-bye a woman could remember. When I’d left Mermeia, and Tam had stayed, he’d come down to the Fortune to see me off. Tam’s idea of saying good-bye had been slamming me against the mainmast and kissing me passionately enough to curl my toes.

“I didn’t want you to forget me,” he said.

“No chance of that, with or without that kiss.”

More than a kiss joined us now.

Tam’s voice was a bare whisper. “Raine, if there was no Saghred, no umi’atsu bond, no Carnades or anyone like him… would there be any chance for the two of us, knowing what I am, what I’ve done?”

“Tam, I don’t know everything you’ve done, only what you’ve told me. And I’m getting the impression that it’s just the tip of a very big iceberg.”

“If you knew, you might not want to see me again.”

One corner of my lips curled in a tiny smile. “Don’t be too sure. I’m a Benares. Our standards of proper behavior are a little different from everyone else’s.” I pushed at my mug with the toe of my boot. “You’ve changed since then.” I didn’t look at him, but kept my eyes on the ale sloshing in the mug. “And you’re doing the best you can to stay that way, and you’re confronting your past as it comes at you. You have to be strong to do that, and brave. I admire you for both.”

Tam laughed once, without humor. “Neither one has been easy.” He paused. “And my best might not be good enough.”

I nodded. “Especially with me around.”

“You have always been a delectable temptation.” Tam’s voice caressed the words like dark silk.

A delicious shiver ran down my spine. Tam was no spellsinger, but his voice could do all kinds of things that had nothing to do with magic and everything to do with seduction. And attraction. Don’t forget attraction, Raine. Like a moth to a flame.

“And the Saghred’s power makes me that much more desirable,” I said bluntly.

“Raine, I don’t want the Saghred. I want you.”

There it was.

“For the foreseeable future, we’re a package deal,” I said, my throat tight. “Wanting me will get you killed; the Saghred will get you damned. You can’t have one without the other.”

“Then I’ll take both.” His voice had a raw edge. It wasn’t Tam’s black magic talking; it was all Tam. I could almost feel his need, his desire to take what he wanted and damn the consequences.

Tam’s hand was between us, and I reached down and took it. With our bond, I could feel the blood surging through his veins, quickening at my touch. Tam wanted to touch me; he wanted to take me in his arms and make it all go away.

I didn’t look at him. “Mychael’s asked A’Zahra Nuru for help.”

“I know. I suggested it.” He sat in silence, until the tension was as thick as the mast at our backs. “Raine, I want to share an umi’atsu bond with you, but not if it would harm you. With the Saghred connecting us, it would do more than harm, it could destroy you. I won’t risk that.”

I looked up sharply. “You’re going to risk separating us?” And risk losing your magic and your life. I didn’t have to say it; we both knew it.

Tam nodded once. “It has to be done.”

“Maybe that’s a risk we don’t have to take.”

He looked at me. “What do you mean?”

I told him my plans for finding a way to destroy the Saghred.

“Those are long odds, Raine.”

“I’ve seen worse. You’re a gambling man. How about it?”

“The rock has the best cards,” he countered, but I could see a trace of a smile and a peek of fang.

I met his smile and raised him a grin. “Then we’ll cheat.”

Tam squeezed my hand. “Then deal me in. But we’d better play our hand quick. There are new players coming to the table.” He took a deep breath, slowly let it out, and didn’t say anything for a couple of heartbeats. That didn’t bode well. “Imala Kalis is on the island,” he said quietly.

“Who-”

“She’s the chief of goblin intelligence.” Tam hesitated. “She was in the Assembly after we’d closed the Hellgate.”

“The one you saw?”

Tam nodded.

And the one he’d lied about.

“How much trouble will she be?” I asked.

“Possibly more than we can handle.”

“I take it that you know her.”

“I do.”

Tam didn’t elaborate, and I didn’t really want to know how well Tam knew her. He had been the goblin queen’s magical enforcer; Imala Kalis was the chief of goblin intelligence. I imagine they’d worked together. Very closely together.

My ale and my stomach suddenly didn’t agree with each other. “Okay, so the chief of goblin intelligence saw what we did. What will she do about it?”

“Nothing, for now. Imala doesn’t believe in wasting good information. She will wait until revealing it is the most advantageous for her.”

“What a sweetheart. Has she contacted you?”

“Not yet, but it’s only a matter of time.”

I thought of Markus Sevelien telling Carnades to sit tight. Markus horded information like a miser horded gold. But unlike a miser, Markus didn’t keep what he horded; he used it. And like Imala Kalis, he used it when it would have maximum effect.

“I have a source in the goblin embassy,” Tam said. “I received one report, but I haven’t heard from him since.”

He calmly stated it as fact, not what it probably was-his source was dead or worse.

“I’ve heard that Rudra Muralin is in the embassy,” I said.

“He is.”

I scowled in frustration. “Muralin kidnapped Carnades when he was the acting archmagus and we still can’t touch him. Diplomatic immunity sucks.”

“And to go in after him would be an act of war.”

“I’m betting Sarad Nukpana has already gone in after him.”

“Rudra would be a good catch for him,” Tam agreed. “He’s powerful, influential, and has the full backing of King Sathrik Mal’Salin; but most important, he has been the Saghred’s bond servant before. Rudra would be the perfect body for Sarad to possess. And if Sarad has taken him, we will be finding out soon enough.”

“And both Muralin and Nukpana know about our umi’atsu bond,” I said. “If we move on them, they’ll move on us-if they haven’t made their first move already.”

I told Tam about Markus Sevelien.

“It’s starting.” Tam’s expression was as dark as his eyes.

“What?”

“Sathrik is sending those closest to him; your government is doing the same. They’re getting directly and openly involved.”

“They want the Saghred.” I knew that fact only too well.

“And in all probability, you to wield it for them. Before your father took the Saghred from King Omari Mal’Salin, the goblins had been waging a campaign of complete extermination against the elven people-and they nearly succeeded. For the past nine hundred years, neither goblin nor elf has had a tactical advantage.”

“By tactical advantage, you mean a rock that will suck out your enemies’ souls.”

“Yes.”

“As far as our governments are concerned, the Saghred is back on the market,” I said.

“Precisely. The goblins want to reclaim it-”

“And the elves want payback.”

This was about more than Tam and Mychael and me. This went much further than simple prejudice and centuries of racial hatred. It was about control over your enemies. The Saghred had become a symbol, a reason for the powerful and blood-thirsty to take those first steps toward something worse.

They were starting a war.