The Darkest Whisper

CHAPTER 19

Don’t let them see…what? Sabin wondered as he gathered the sleeping Gwen in his arms. A mewling sound parted her lips, soft and oddly erotic. He tightened his grip, feeling oddly protective.

Don’t let the Lords see her naked body? Done. He would rather die than allow another man a peek at her beauty.

Don’t let her sisters see her like this? Again, done. They would ask questions he wasn’t ready to answer. More than that, they tended to react negatively to the thought of Gwen snoozing. Why? It still made no sense to him.

Another mewl, this one quieter, breathy. His stomach clenched in desire, because it was a sound she’d made while grinding on his erection. The sun stroked her, highlighting the glimmer of her skin, her rosy nipples. Her hands were folded over her belly, her body loose, her head resting trustingly at the base of his neck. Strawberry curls tumbled over his arm, his stomach, and it felt as if he were draped in silk.

Should he dress her? No, he thought a moment later. He didn’t want to jostle her and accidentally wake her. Finally, she was resting. Truly resting. And all he’d had to do was pleasure her senseless, he thought dryly. Then he grinned. If he had to, he would pleasure her senseless every night. Girl needed her rest, after all. And (cough, cough) he was used to making sacrifices.

He didn’t even consider dressing himself. He would have had to put her down and coverage wasn’t a good enough reason to risk a twig poking her or a bug crawling on her.

Sabin kissed her temple, unable to help himself, and stalked forward. Remaining in shadows, he edged toward the back of the fortress, always careful of the cameras, pits and trip wires he and the other warriors had designed to keep Hunters out.

What had just happened between him and Gwen…He’d never experienced anything like it before. Not even with Darla, whom he had loved.

And unlike Darla, Gwen just might be strong enough to cope with his demon over the long term. It had been a startling, and welcome, revelation.

Do you really think you can keep her? How long will she love you, if she’s ever stupid enough to love you? You might betray her. And you’re always rushing off to fight. Worse, you plan to fight beside her sisters. What if they’re killed? Gwen will blame you, and rightly so.

The doubts didn’t float through him. They screamed, pounding into his temples, beating at his skull. He cringed from the sharp ache of it. Now that Gwen was asleep, her Harpy tethered, Sabin’s demon had come out of hiding, pissed and desperate to feed.

What better to feed on than the secret fears Sabin only then realized he’d harbored? And now that they’d been forced to the forefront of his mind, there was no blocking them; they nearly swallowed him whole.

Did he want Gwen to love him?

To have those amber eyes regard him softly, today, tomorrow, forever…to have that luscious body in his bed every night…to hear that sparkling laughter…to protect her…to awaken her to the strength of her true nature…

Yes, he wanted her to love him. She could handle his demon in mental combat, as he’d just discovered. Hell, she’d frightened the beast into submission.

Part of him had loved her since the moment he’d seen her, he realized. When she’d been captive, helpless, his every instinct had clamored to save her. Then, as she’d struggled to keep her Harpy under tight control, to follow the rules of her people, he’d found himself fascinated by her. But he’d never really understood her, had mistakenly thought her weak. Now, he saw her for what she really was: stronger than her sisters, stronger than him.

For most of her life, she’d suppressed a seemingly insuppressible brute. Sabin had trouble caging his demon for more than a day. She’d left her family to pursue her own dream. She hadn’t run from him, even when she’d discovered his origins and even though she’d been afraid.

Oh, yes. There was more courage in this tiny female than anyone had realized. Even Gwen. Now, because of him, she wanted to attack the Hunters. She wanted to place herself in danger, each and every day.

If she were injured, she would heal. That, he knew. Rationally, at least. The thought of her injured, bloodied, broken, however, nearly had him roaring as he snuck in one of the back entrances to the fortress. I’m a fucking idiot!

No argument here.

Frowning, he made his way to a secret passage, a passage Torin monitored.

Sabin stared up at one of the hidden cameras and shook his head, a command for his friend’s silence. Never once did he slow his gait, though. When he reached his bedroom, he barricaded the door. Did Gwen love him? She was attracted to him, otherwise she wouldn’t have given herself to him. And so passionately, at that, gifting him with the best orgasm of his long, long life. She trusted him, otherwise she wouldn’t have admitted her greatest weakness. But love?

If she did love him, could that love withstand the trials they were sure to face? Yes or no, he realized he wouldn’t let her go. She belonged to him now, and he belonged to her. He’d warned her there would be consequences to giving herself to him.

He wanted to know everything about her. He wanted to see to her every need. Pamper her. Kill anyone who hurt her—even her sisters.

He’d once told her that he could—and would—sleep with a woman other than the one he loved if it meant aiding his cause. How silly he’d been. How naive. The thought of bedding another woman left him cold. Even sick. No one would feel, sound and taste like his Gwen. More than that, it would hurt her, and he couldn’t hurt her. And the thought of Gwen bedding another man—touching him, kissing him, enjoying him—just to win a battle sent Sabin into a killing rage.

What if she wants another man? Desires him? Craves—

Another word, and I swear to the gods I’ll find Pandora’s box and suck you out by the balls.

You’d die. There was a tremor to the words.

You’d suffer. And we both know I’ll spite myself to destroy my enemy.

Who would guard your precious Gwen?

Her sisters. Shall I go get them? Let you talk to them?

Silence. Sweet silence.

Sabin gently placed Gwen on the bed and tucked the covers around her. A loud knock echoed from his door, and he scowled. Gwen didn’t move, didn’t moan or act as if she was aware of the interruption in any way. That saved the intruder’s life.

Three long strides and he was at the door, removing the barricade then ripping it open.

Kaia tried to push her way inside. “Where is she? You better not have hurt her, Mr. Pound On Gwen For Giggles.”

“It wasn’t for giggles. It was to strengthen her, and you know it. You should be thanking me, since you failed to do your job. Now go.”

She glared up at him, hands on her hips. “I’m not leaving until I see her.”

“We’re busy.”

Golden eyes, so eerily similar to Gwen’s, darted down his naked body. “I see that. I still want to talk to her.”

Don’t let them see, Gwen had beseeched. “She’s naked.” Truth. “And I’d like to get back to her.” Again, truth. “Your conversation can wait.”

A wide grin spread over the Harpy’s beautiful face, and his shoulders sagged in relief. Thank the gods sex wasn’t against those damned Harpy rules.

He and Gwen were going to have a long talk when she awoke, and she was going to outline exactly what was permitted and what wasn’t. And then the rules he didn’t agree with would be demolished.

“Mom would be so proud! Little Gwennie, bagging an evil demon.”

“Get lost.” He slammed the door in her face. Then he grimaced and spun. Thankfully Gwen still hadn’t moved.

Throughout the day, warriors, females and Harpies alike came knocking on his door. He couldn’t relax because he couldn’t get Gwen’s words out of his head. Don’t let who see what, damn it? The sisters had already seen her sleeping with him, the night of their arrival, so now he wasn’t sure that was such a big deal. They hadn’t tried to punish her or anything. Was Gwen ashamed of the wounds in her neck? Maybe he shouldn’t have bitten her.

The first visitors were Maddox and a smiling Ashlyn, holding a plate of sandwiches. “After such an intense training session, I thought you and Gwen might be hungry.”

Maddox hadn’t been smiling, but he hadn’t insisted Gwen be made to leave, either. “Thanks.” Sabin took the plate and shut the door. He’d pulled on a robe, wanting to give the appearance of a sexual marathon—Kaia had seemed happy about that, so surely it wasn’t shameful to the Harpies—while still maintaining his dignity.

Next came Anya and Lucien. “You and Gwen wanna watch a slasher movie with us while we pretend to read those dusty scrolls but really make everyone else do all the work?” Anya asked, waggling her eyebrows. “It’s gonna be fun.”

“No, thanks.” Again, he shut the door.

A short while later, Bianka arrived. “I need to talk to my sister.”

“She’s still busy.” Sleeping. He shut the door in her scowling face.

Finally the visits tapered off. Sabin texted Torin to let him know he was staying behind while the others went to Chicago.

Figured, was the reply. Which is why I already found you a replacement. Gideon’s taking over the mission.

His relief was almost palpable. Leaving Gwen like this wasn’t even an option.

If any of the men are injured, you’ll blame yourself, Doubt said.

Sabin didn’t try to deny it. With reason.

What if you begin to resent Gwen?

Now he rolled his eyes. I won’t.

How do you know? Sulky, whiny.

She’s not to blame. I am. If I resent anyone, it will be myself.

Seriously, how could he resent this tenderhearted woman? If she’d known about the trip, he suspected she would have wanted to go herself.

Sabin watched the sun set, the moon rise and the sun reappear, unable to rest or relax. Why wasn’t Gwen waking up? No one needed this much rest. Did she need blood again? He’d thought he’d given her plenty in the heat of their loving.

Sabin leaned back in the chair he’d dragged to the bedside. The wooden slats dug into his back, but he didn’t mind. They kept him alert, his mind active.

Look at you. You’re becoming everything you’ve ever despised, he thought. Weak, because of a woman. Worried, over a woman. Vulnerable to attack, because of a woman.

“Sabin,” a breathless sigh rang out.

Sabin jerked upright in the chair, feet hitting the floor with a thump. His heart skipped a beat, his lungs nearly seized. Finally!

Gwen’s eyes blinked open, but her eyelashes were matted together and she had to scrub them. Then their gazes collided, and he forgot to breathe. He’d wondered how she would react to awakening in his bed; he should have wondered how he’d react. He could have prepared himself. He was shaking, his blood heating at the sensual sight of her, rumpled and ready.

She frowned, attention sweeping the bedroom. “How’d I get here? Wait. Tell me when I return.” She threw her legs over the side of the bed and lumbered to a stand.

Sabin was already on his feet, already swooping her up in his arms.

“I can walk,” she protested.

“I know.” He deposited her in the bathroom, stepped back into the room and shut the door behind him, allowing her a measure of privacy.

What if she falls and hurts herself?

Shut up. You’re not going to affect me right now.

A horrified gasp pummeled through the wood, and he grinned. She must have only then realized she was naked. Holding her like that had affected him madly. He was hard as a steel pipe, her female scent in his nose.

When he heard the water switch on, he grabbed a change of clothes and stalked to the bedroom next to his. The door was open, so he walked inside without preamble. The three Harpies sat in a circle on the floor, stacks of groceries in the center. They were laughing about something—until they spotted him.

Kaia’s eyes began to bleed black, and Sabin’s demon quickly retreated. “Our food,” she squawked and he grimaced. Funny. Didn’t bother him when Gwen sounded like that. Rather, he just wanted to please her. “We stole it. It’s ours.”

“Calm down.” Bianka slapped her arm, though her gaze never left Sabin. “About time you showed up. Where’s Gwennie?”

“Showering. I need to use yours.” He didn’t wait for permission, but headed into the bathroom and gathered a towel.

“After hours and hours of nonstop sex, you guys can’t share a stall?” one of them called. Sometimes, when he couldn’t see the twins, it was hard to tell which was speaking.

“Maybe there’ll be another marathon if they try and share,” another teased.

They cackled.

“Did she put you in a coma? Has she been hiding you all this time to keep you from being shamed?” Taliyah had spoken this time; he recognized that cold timbre, which never failed to make him shudder.

She knew the truth, he realized. He wondered yet again if sleeping like that was against Harpy protocol. “What if she did?” he found himself saying.

Bianka and Kaia twittered. “Go little sis,” one of them said.

Sabin kicked the door shut and jumped into the shower, moving quickly, afraid the females would burst in on Gwen and question her before he could. But they were exactly as he’d left them when he emerged, eating and laughing.

Taliyah, the only one not smiling, nodded at him. In gratitude?

He took a quick detour through the kitchen—someone had shopped, thank the gods—and rounded up a bag of chips, a brownie, a granola bar, an apple and a bottle of water. Loaded down, he entered his bedroom, shut the door with a backward kick, and found Gwen seated on the edge of the bed. She wore a pair of sweat shorts and a bright blue T-shirt, both of which she’d picked for herself in town the other day, her hair wet and dripping from a knot atop her head.

Doubt peeked from the shadowed corner in Sabin’s mind, but decided not to risk incurring the Harpy’s wrath and hid again.

Forcing his expression to remain neutral, he settled into the chair he’d occupied for far too long already. He balanced the tray on his stomach.

“We need to talk,” she said, gazing at the food with longing. “About what happened in the forest…”

Before she could venture down that path, he told her how long she’d been out, how he’d guarded her, how no one had seen her neck, no one knew what she’d really been doing and how everyone assumed they’d been going at it like animals.

“There is a God,” she said on a relieved breath.

Or gods. But whatever. Any other woman would have been horrified, he thought, fighting a grin. Still more proof that she was the only woman for him. “Now you’re going to answer some questions for me.”

She gulped, eyes luminous in the sunlight that streamed through a gap in the dark, heavy curtains. “All right.”

“Why can you only eat stolen food?”

Her eyes narrowed. “I’m not supposed to discuss it.”

“I think we’re beyond that point.”

“I guess we are,” she said grudgingly. “Why do you want to know?”

“So I can understand.” He popped open the brownie and bit into the end. “You’ve trusted me with your body. You’ve trusted me to guard you while you sleep. You’ve even trusted me with your weakness. Now trust me with your secrets.”

Up and down her chest moved, her breath emerging shallow and raspy. Her stomach rumbled, and she rubbed it without looking away from him. Or rather, the food. “I–I—okay. Yes.” She licked her lips. “Will you pay me?”

“Pay you? How much and for what?”

“Just say yes!” It was snarled.

“Yes?”

She licked her lips again, words tumbling from her. “The gods despise Harpies and consider us an abomination since we were the spawn of a prince of darkness. Long ago, they hoped to bring about our ruin in a manner that would not reflect poorly on them. A way that would seem as if we’d destroyed ourselves. So they cursed us in secret, stating that never again could we enjoy a meal freely given to us or one we had prepared ourselves. We sicken terribly if we disregard the curse; some even die. It only takes once to learn that lesson. As you saw for yourself at the camp in Egypt.

“Anyway, the first of my kind learned through trial and error that they could still eat, but only what they’d stolen or what was given to them in payment. The gods didn’t succeed in destroying us, just making our lives difficult. So pay me. I gave you the answer you wanted, now you owe me.”

Her demand for payment suddenly made sense. And hadn’t Anya mentioned something about eating what they earned? Gods, he had to smarten up and listen better. “For the secret.” He tossed the brownie at her and she caught it with a too-quick flick of her wrist. The dessert was consumed a second later. This was yet another similarity they shared, he reflected. Both their lives had been affected by a curse.

“You should have told me I could pay you with food,” he chided. “I could have been feeding you all along.”

“I didn’t know you well enough to share the fundamentals of my race. And as my sisters say, knowledge is power. You didn’t need more power over me.”

He’d often said the same thing, though he thought he did need more power over her. “But now you do?” he asked softly, foolishly pleased with her. “Know me, that is?”

Her cheeks burned bright red. “Well, now I know you better.”

Fair enough. Sabin dangled the bag of chips from pinched fingers. “Tell me who you didn’t want to see you, what you didn’t want them to see.”

“My sisters. I didn’t want them to see me sleeping.”

So that had been the reason. “Wait. Tell me how you rested with your chicken, and then you’ll get these.”

“Sabin. Chips!”

“You haven’t answered to my satisfaction.”

“I never rested with a chick—Oh, you mean Tyson. For a long time, I didn’t. Didn’t rest, I mean. Does that count? Did I earn the chips?” She reached out, fingers waving eagerly.

He held firm. “How long were you with him?”

“Six months.”

Six. Months. He gritted his teeth, not liking the thought of her with anyone that long. “You remained awake for all that time?”

“No. At first, I let him think I had insomnia. I’d stay up all night. But when the fatigue would get to be too much, I would call in sick at work and sleep in the trees. That’s the only location we’re supposed to sleep, since it’s nearly impossible to be seen or reached. But as the months passed, I thought, why not rest with this man I trusted? So I started sleeping in bed with him. And before you ask, not sleeping around other people wasn’t a command or curse of the gods, but a safety measure every Harpy is taught from birth.”

He didn’t recall her sisters leaving at night to head for the forest, but as silently as they moved, they certainly could have. “Why?”

She pushed out a frustrated breath. “Our wings can be bound while we sleep, as proven by my time in captivity. Now give. Me. The. Chips.”

He tossed the bag.

Plastic ripped and orange-stained chips sprayed. Gwen popped one in her mouth, closed her eyes and moaned. Sabin had to swallow a moan of his own.

“Do you want to earn the apple?”

The tip of her tongue emerged, swiping over her lips. “Yes. Please.”

“Tell me your thoughts about me. About what we did in the forest. And don’t lie. I’m only paying for the truth.”

She hesitated.

Why didn’t she want him to know? What didn’t she want him to know? A minute ticked by in silence, and he feared she would simply content herself with the food she already had. Then she surprised him.

“I like you. More than I should. I’m attracted to you and want to be with you. When I’m not with you, I’m thinking about you. It’s stupid. I’m stupid. But I love the way I feel when I’m with you. When your demon’s quiet, I don’t feel ashamed or forgettable or scared. I feel worthy, desired and protected.”

Sabin tossed the apple at her and she caught it, her gaze avoiding him. “I feel the same about you,” he admitted gruffly.

“You do?” Her eyes snapped to him, bright with hope.

“I do.”

Slowly she grinned, but that grin soon fell away and her shoulders slumped. She bit into the apple, chewed, swallowed.

“Tell me what you’re thinking,” he said.

“I don’t know if we can make anything work. You once said you could betray the woman you loved if it meant winning a battle. Not that I think you love me. I just, well, if you were to be with someone else, I would kill her. Then you.” There at the end, there had been steel in her tone. Steel sharpened to a razor point.

“I won’t. I wouldn’t. I don’t think I can.” He scrubbed a hand down his face. “You’re the only thing I can think about anymore. I doubt I could even fake it with someone else.”

“But for how long will that last?” she asked softly, rolling the apple in her palms.

Forever, he suspected, guilt filling him. He’d already devoted more time to her than he should have. He hadn’t studied the names on Cronus’s scrolls or done anything to find the two remaining artifacts. He hadn’t been searching for Galen.

For so many years, he’d placed the war with the Hunters above everything else—and demanded the same from his men. Distractions hadn’t been tolerated. They’d given him everything he’d asked for, and more. How could he, as their leader, now give himself fully to Gwen?

So, rather than answer her, he pushed to his feet, said, “I’ve neglected my duties to watch over you and now have a lot to do,” and left her. If he hoped to keep her, he had a lot of shit to figure out first.