Sundiver

23. AN EXCITED STATE

Pierre LaRoque sat with his back to the utility dome. He hugged his knees and stared vacantly at the deck. He wondered, miserably, if Millie would give him a shot to last him until the Sunship got out of the chromosphere.

Unfortunately, that wouldn’t be in keeping with his new role as a prophet. He shuddered. During his entire career he had never realized how much it meant to have only to comment, and not to have to shape events. The Solarian had given him a curse, not a blessing.

He wondered, dully, if the creature had chosen him in an ironic whim… as a joke: Or had it somehow planted words deep within him that would come out when he got back to Earth, shocking and embarrassing him.

Or am I just supposed to spout out my own opinions as I always have? He rocked slowly, miserably. To foist one’s ideas on others by dint of personality was one thing. To speak clothed in a prophet’s mantle was quite another.

The others had gathered near the command station to discuss the next step. He could hear them talking and wished they’d just go away. Without looking up, he could feel it when they turned and stared at him. LaRoque wished he were dead.

“I say we should bump him off,” Donaldson suggested. His burr was very pronounced, now. Jacob, listening nearby, wished the ethnic languages fad had never caught on. “There’ll be no end of the trouble that man’ll cause if he gets loose on Earth!,” the engineer finished.

Martine chewed on her lip for a moment. “No, that wouldn’t be wise. Better beam Earth for instructions when we get back to Hermes. The feds may decide to use up an emergency sequester allotment on him, but I don’t think anyone would get away with actually eliminating Peter.”

“I’m surprised you react that way to the chief’s suggestion,” Jacob said. “One would think you’d be aghast at the idea.”

Martine shrugged. “By now it must be clear to all of you that I represent a faction in the Confederacy Assembly. Peter is my friend, but if I felt it was my duty to Earth to put him out of the way, I’d do it myself.” She looked grim.

Jacob wasn’t as surprised as he might have been. If the chief engineer felt a need to put up a layer of flippancy, to get through the shock of the last hour, many of the others had dropped all pretense. Martine was willing to think about the unthinkable. Nearby, LaRoque didn’t pretend to be anything but scared as he rocked slowly, apparently oblivious to them all.

Donaldson raised his index finger.

“Did you notice that the Solarian didn’ say anything at all about the message beam? It passed right through im and he didn’t seem to care. Yet earlier, the other Ghost…”

“The juvenile.”

“… the juvenile, definitely reacted.”

Jacob scratched his earlobe. “There’s no end to mysteries. Why has the adult creature always avoided being in line with our rim instruments? Has it got something to hide? Why all the threatening gestures on all the previous dives, when he was capable of communicating ever since Dr. Marline brought her psi helmet aboard months ago?”

“Maybe your P-laser gave it an element it needed,” a crewman suggested, an Oriental gentleman named Chen, whom Jacob had met only at the start of the dive. “An alternative hypothesis would be that it was waiting for someone of reasonable status to speak to.”

Martine sniffed.

“That’s the theory we were working on on the last dive, and it didn’t work. Bubbacub faked contact, and for all of his talents Fagin failed… oh, you mean Peter…”

The silence could be cut with a knife.

“Jacob, I sure wish we could have found a projector,” Donaldson smiled wryly. “T’would have solved all our problems,”

Jacob grinned back, without humor. “Deux ex machina, Chief? You know better than to expect special favors from the universe.”

“We might as well resign ourselves,” Martine said. “We may never see another adult Ghost. Folks were skeptical about all of these stories about ‘anthropomorphic shapes’ back on Earth. It’s just the word of a couple dozen sophonts that have seen them, plus a few blurred photos. In time it may be all put down to hysteria, despite my tests.” She looked down gloomily.

Jacob was aware of Helene deSilva standing next to him. She had been strangely silent since calling them together a few minutes before.

“Well at least this time Sundiver itself isn’t threatened,” Jacob said. “The solonomical research can go on, and so can studies of the toroid herds. The Solarian said that they won’t interfere.”

“Yeah,” Donaldson added. “But will he?” he gestured at LaRoque.

“We have to decide what to do next. We’re drifting near the bottom of the herd now. Do we go up and keep poking around? Maybe Solarians vary among themselves as much as we humans do. Maybe the one we met was a grouch.” Jacob suggested.

“I hadn’t thought of that,” Martine commented.

“Let’s put the Parametric Laser on automatic and add a portion in coded English to the communication tape. It’ll beam into the herd, as we spiral leisurely upward, on the off chance that friendlier adult Solarian might be attracted.”

“If one is, I sure hope it doesn’t scare me out of my codpiece like that last one did,” Donaldson muttered.

Helene deSilva rubbed her shoulders as if fighting a chill. “Has anyone else got anything to say ‘en camera’? Then I’m going to settle the humans-only part of this discussion by ruling out any precipitate action concerning Mr. LaRoque. Just everybody keep your eyes on him, just in case.

“This meeting is in recess. Think about ideas on what to do next. Someone please ask Fagin and Culla to join us at the refreshment center in twenty minutes. That’s all.”

Jacob felt a hand on his arm. Helene stood next to him.

“Are you all right?” he asked.

“Fine… fine.” She smiled without much conviction. “I’d just… Jacob, would you come to my office with me, please?”

“Sure, after you.”

Helene shook her head. Her fingers dug info his arm and she pulled him along in a fast walk toward the closet-sized cubbyhole in the side of the dome that. Served as a captain’s office. When they were inside she cleared a space on the tiny desk and motioned for him to sit. Then she closed the door and sagged back against it.

“Oh, God,” she sighed.

“Helene…” Jacob started forward, then stopped. Her eyes blazed blue up at him.

“Jacob,” she was making a concentrated effort to be calm. “Can you promise me you’ll do me a favor for a few minutes and not talk about it afterwards? I can’t tell you what it is until you agree.” Her eyes appealed silently.

Jacob didn’t have to think. “Of course, Helene. You can ask anything. But tell me what’s the…”

“Then please, just hold me.” Her voice trailed off in a cry. She came up against his chest with her arms tacked in in front of her… la mute surprise, Jacob put his arms around her and held on tightly.

Slowly he rocked her back and forth as a series of powerful tremors ran through! her body. “Sshhh… It’s all right…” He spoke reassuring nonsense words. Her hair brushed his cheek and her smell seemed to fill the tiny room. It was heady.

For a time they stood-together silently. She moved her head slowly on his shoulder.

The tremors subsided. Gradually her body relaxed. He stroked the taut muscles of her back with one hand and they loosened one by one.

Jacob wondered who was doing whom the favor. He hadn’t felt this peaceful, this calm, for Ifni knew how long. It moved him that she trusted him so.

More, it made him happy. There was a bitter little voice below that was gnashing its teeth at this moment, but he wasn’t listening. Doing what he was doing now felt more natural than breathing.

After a few more moments, Helene lifted her head. When she spoke her voice was thick.

“I’ve never been so scared in all my life,” she said. “I want you to understand that I didn’t have to do this. I could have been Iron Lady for the rest of the dive… but you were here, available… I had to. I’m sorry.”

Jacob noticed that Helene made no effort to back away. He kept his arms around her.

“No problem,” he spoke softly. “Sometime later I’ll tell you how nice it was. Don’t worry about being scared. I just about went out of my skin when I saw those letters. Curiosity and numbness are my defense mechanisms. You saw how the others were reacting. You just had more responsibility is all.”

Helene didn’t say anything. She brought her hands up and put them on his shoulders, without creating a space between them.

“Anyway,” Jacob went on, brushing free locks of her hair into place. “You must have been more startled lots of times during your Jumps.”

Helene stiffened and pushed back from his chest.

“Mr. Demwa, you are intolerable! You and your constantly mentioning my Jumps! Do you think I’ve ever been as scared as that?! Just how old do you think I am?”

Jacob smiled. She hadn’t pushed back hard enough to shake off his arms. Obviously she wasn’t ready for him to let go.

“Well, relativity-wise…” he began.

“Fuck relativity! I’m twenty-five! I may have seen more sky than you have but I’ve experienced a hell of lot less of the real universe than you… and my competence rating says nothing about how I feel inside! It’s scary having to be perfect and strong and responsible for people’s lives… for me at least, it is, unlike you, you impervious, imperturbable, once-upon-a-time hero-oaf, standing there calm as you please, just like Captain Beloc on Calypso when we ran that crazy fake blockade at J8’lek and… and now I’m going to go highly illegal and order you to kiss me, since you don’t seem about to do it on your own!”

She looked at him defiantly. When Jacob laughed and pulled her toward him, she resisted momentarily. Then her arms slid around his neck and her lips pressed up against his.

Jacob distantly felt her tremble again. But this time it was different. It was hard to tell how it was different, since he was busy at the moment. Enchantingly so.

Suddenly, agonizingly, he realized how long it had been since… two very long years. He pushed the thought aside. Tania was dead, and Helene was beautifully, wonderfully alive. He held her tighter and answered her passion in the only way possible.

“Excellent therapy, Doctor,” she teased as he tried to comb the knots out of his hair. “I feel like a million bucks, though I’ll admit you look like you’ve been through a wringer.”

“What’s… urk, what’s a ‘wringer’? Never mind, I don’t want any explanations of your anachronisms. Look at you! You’re proud of making me feel like a bar of steel that’s been melted and bent out of shape!”

“Yup.”

Jacob didn’t succeed at suppressing a grin. “Shut up and respect your elders. How much time do we have, anyway?”

Helens glanced at her ring. “About two minutes. Damned awkward timeto have a meeting. You were just starting to get interesting. Who the hell called it at such an inconvenient moment?”

“You did.”

“Ah, yes. So I did. Next time I’ll give you at least a half hour, and we’ll investigate matters in more detail.”

Jacob nodded uncertainly. It was hard to tell, sometimes, at what level this fem was kidding.

Before she unlatched the door, Helene soberly leaned up and kissed him.

“Thank you, Jacob.”

He caressed the side of her face with his left hand. She pressed against it briefly. There was nothing to say when he brought the hand away.

Helene opened the door and looked out. There was no one in sight but the pilot. Everyone else had probably gathered for the second meeting at the refreshment center.

“Let’s go,” she said. “I could eat a horse!”

Jacob shuddered. If he was going to get to know Helene better, he’d better be prepared for a lot of exercise for his imagination. A horse indeed!

Still, he dropped a little less than a foot back as they walked, so he could watch Helene move. It was so distracting that he didn’t notice when a spinning torus swung past the ship, its sides emblazoned with starbursts and surrounded by a halo as white and bright as the down on the breast of a dove.

24. SPONTANEOUS EMISSION

Culla was just pulling a liquitube out of Fagin’s foliage when they returned. One arm was enmeshed in the Kanten’s leafy branches. The Pring held another liquitube in his other hand.

“Welcome back,” Fagin fluted. “Pring Culla was just assisting me with my dietary supplement. I am afraid that in doing so he has neglected his own.”

“No problem, shir,” Culla said. He slowly pulled the tube backward.

Jacob came up behind the Pring to watch. This was a chance to learn more about Fagin’s workings. The Kan-ten once told him that his species had no modesty taboo, so surely he wouldn’t mind if Jacob sighted along Culla’s arm to see what sort of orifice the semi-vegetable alien used.

He was bent over thus when suddenly Culla jerked back, pulling the liquitube free. His elbow collided painfully with the ridge above Jacob’s eye, sending him backwards on his rump.

Culla chattered loudly. The liquitubes dropped from the hands that fell limply to his sides. Helene had trouble choking back a fit of laughter. Jacob hurried to his feet. His “I’ll-get-even-someday” grimace at Helene only made her cough more loudly.

“Forget it, Culla,” he said. “No damage done. It was my fault. I have a spare eye anyway.” He resisted the urge to rub the spot where it hurt.

Culla looked down at him with shining eyes. The chattering subsided. -

“You are mosht gracioush, Friend-Jacob,” he said at last. “In a proper client-elder shituation I wash at fault for careleshnesh. I thank you for forgiving me.”

“Tut tut, my friend.” Jacob waved it aside. Actually he could feel the beginnings of a nasty bump forming. Still, it would be worthwhile changing the subject to save Culla further embarrassment.

“Speaking of spare eyes, I read that your species, and most of those on Pring, had only one eye before the Pila arrived and started their genetic program.”

“Yesh, Jacob. The Pila gave ush two eyesh for esthetic purposhesh. In the galaxy mosht bipedsh are binocular. They did not want ush… teashed by the other young racesh.”

Jacob frowned. There was something… he knew Mr. Hyde already had it but was holding back, still in his peevish mood.

Damnit, it’s my unconscious!

No use. Oh well.

“But Culla, I also read that your species were arboreal… even brachiating, if I remember right…”

“What’s that mean?” Donaldson whispered to deSilva. “It means they used to swing from tree limbs,” she answered. “Now hush!”

“…But if they had only one eye how did your ancestors have good enough depth perception to keep from missing when they reached for the next branch?”

Before Jacob even finished his sentence he felt jubilation, That had been the question Mr. Hyde was holding back! So the little devil didn’t have a complete lock on unconscious insight! Helene was doing him good already. He hardly cared what Culla’s answer was.

“I thought you knew. Friend-Jacob. I overheard Commandant deShilva explaining during our firsht dive that I have different receiversh than you do. My eyesh can detect phase ash well ash inteashity.”

“Yes.” Jacob was starting to have fun now. He’d have to keep his eyes on Fagin. The old Kanten would warn him if he was getting into an area Culla found touchy.

“Yes, but sunlight, particularly in a forest, would have to be totally incoherent… random in phase. Now a dolphin uses a system like yours in her sonar, keeping the phase and all. But she provides her own coherent phase field by letting out well-timed squeaks into her surroundings.”

Jacob stepped back, enjoying a dramatic pause. His foot fell on one of the liquitubes Culla had dropped. Absently he picked it up.

“So if all your ancestors’ eyes did was retain the phase, the whole thing still wouldn’t work without having a source of coherent light in your environment.” Jacob got excited. “Natural lasers? Do your forests have some natural source of laser light?”

“By George that would be interesting!” Donaldson commented.

Culla nodded. “Yesh, Jacob. We call them the…” his mashies came together in a complicated rhythm “…plants. It’sh incredible that you dedushed their exishtence from sho few cluesh. You are to be congratulated. I will show you picturesh of one when we get back.”

Jacob caught a glimpse of Helene, smiling at him, possessively. (Deep inside his head he felt a distant rumbling. He ignored it.) “Yes, I’d like to see it, Culla.”

The liquitube was sticky in his hand. There was a smell in the air, like new mown hay.

“Here, Culla.” He held out the liquitube. “I think you dropped this.” Then his arm froze. He stared at the tube for a moment then broke out laughing.

“Millie, come here!” he shouted. “Look at this!” He held out the tube to Dr. Martine and pointed to the label.

“3-(alpha-Acetonylbenzyl) — 4-hydroxycoumarin al-kalide mix?” She looked uncertain for a moment then her jaw dropped. “Why, that’s Warfarin! So it’s one of Culla’s dietary supplements! Well then how the hell did a sample get into Dwayne’s pharmacopoeia?”

Jacob smiled ruefully, “I’m afraid that misunderstanding was all my fault. I absentmindedly picked up a sample of one of Culla’s beverage mix tablets back aboard the Bradbury. I was so sleepy then that I forgot about it. It must have gone into the same pocket where I later stashed Dr. Kepler’s samples. They all went together to Dr. Laird’s lab.

“It was just a wild coincidence that one of Culla’s nutrient supplements happened to be identical with an old terrestrial poison, but boy did it have me going in circles! I was thinking Bubbacub slipped it to Kepler to make him unstable, but I was never very happy with that theory.” He shrugged.

“Well I, for one, am relieved the whole thing is solved!” Martine laughed. “I didn’t like what people were thinking about me!”

It was a minor discovery. But somehow clearing up one small, nagging mystery had transformed the mood of those present. They talked animatedly.

The only pall came as Pierre LaRoque passed by, laughing softly. Dr. Martine went to ask him to join them, but the little man just shook his head, then resumed walking in a slow path around the rim of the ship.

Helene stood next to Jacob. She touched the hand that still held Culla’s liquitube.

“Speaking of coincidences, did you take a close look at the formula for Culla’s supplement?” She stopped and looked up, Culla came up to them and bowed.

“If you are finished now, Jacob. I will put thish shticky tube away.”

“What? Oh sure, Culla. Here. Now what were you saying, Helene?”

Even when her face was serious it was hard not to be struck by her beauty. It’s the initial “falling” of love that, for a time, makes listening to one’s lover difficult.

“…I just saying that I noticed an interesting coincidence when Dr. Martine read that chemical formula aloud. Do you remember earlier, when we were talking about organic dye laser’s? Well…”

Helene’s voice faded away. Jacob could see her mouth move, but all he could make out was one word: “…coumarin…”

There was trouble erupting below. His channeled neurosis had mutinied. Mr. Hyde was trying to stop him from listening to Helene. In fact, he suddenly realized, his other half had been holding back its usual tithe of insight ever since Helene had hinted, in their conversation at the edge of the deck, that she wanted him to give her the genes she’d be taking to the stars when the Calypso jumped.

Hyde hates Helene! he realized with a shock. The first girl I’ve met who could begin to replace what I’ve lost (a tremor, like a migraine, threatened to split his skull) and Hyde hates her! (The headache came and went instantly).

What was more, that part of his unconscious had been holding out on him. It had seen all of the pieces and hadn’t let them surface. This was a violation of the agreement. It was intolerable, and he couldn’t figure out why!

“Jacob, are you all right?” Helene’s voice was back. She looked at him quizzically. Over her shoulder he could see Culla, looking down at them from near the food machines.

“Helene,” he said abruptly. “Listen, I left a small box of pills by the Pilot Board. They’re for these headaches I get sometimes… could you please look for them for me?” He brought a hand up to his forehead and grimaced.

“Why… sure,” Helene touched his arm. “Why don’t you come with me? You could lie down. We’ll talk…”

“No,” he took her by the shoulders and gently turned her the right way. “Please, you go. I’ll wait here.” Furiously, he fought down panic at the time it was taking to get her away.

“Okay, I’ll be right back,” Helene said. As she walked away Jacob sighed with relief. Most of those present had their goggles on their belts, per standing orders. The competent and efficient Commandant deSilva had left hers at her couch.

When she had gone about ten meters toward her destination, Helene began to wonder.

Jacob never left any box of pills by the Pilot Board. I would have known it if he had. He wanted to get rid of me! But why?

She looked back. Jacob was just turning away from a food machine with a protein roll in his hand. He smiled at Martin and nodded at Ghen, then started to walk past Fagin to get out onto the open deck. Behind him Culla watched the group with bright eyes, near the gravity-loop hatch.

Jacob didn’t look like he had a headache at all! Helene felt hurt and confused.

Well if he doesn’t want me around, that’s fine. I’ll make a pretense of looking for his damned pills!

She started to turn when, suddenly, Jacob tripped on one of Fagin’s root pods and went sprawling on the deck. The protein roll bounced away and fetched up against the Parametric Laser housing. Before she could react, Jacob was on his feet again, smiling sheepishly. He walked over to pick up the food ball. Bending over, his shoulder touched the barrel of the laser.

Blue light flooded the room instantly. Whooping alarms howled. Helene instinctively covered her eyes behind her arm and grabbed for the goggles at her waist.

They weren’t there!

Her couch was three meters away. She could picture where she was exactly, and where she’d stupidly left the goggles. She turned and dove for them, coming up again in one movement, the protectors over her eyes.

There were bright spots everywhere. The P-laser, shoved out of plumb with the ship’s radius, was sending its beam bouncing about the concave inner surface of the Sunship’s shell. The modulated “contact code” flashed against the deck and dome.

Bodies writhed on the deck near the food machines. No one had approached the P-laser to shut it off. Where were Jacob and Donaldson? Were they blinded in the first instant?

Several figures struggled near the gravity-loop hatch. In the flashing, sepulchral light she saw that they were Jacob Demwa and the chief engineer… and Culla. They… Jacob was trying to shove a bag over the alien’s head!

There was no time to decide what to do. Between intervening in the mysterious fight and eliminating a possible danger to her ship, Helen didn’t have to choose.

She ran over to the P-laser, ducking under faint, crisscrossing trails, and tore out the plug.

The flashing points of light stopped abruptly, except for one that coincided with a shriek of pain and a crash, near the hatchway. The alarms shut off and suddenly there was only the sound of people moaning.

“Captain, what is it? What’s happening?” The voice of the pilot rang out over the intercom. Helene picked up the mike from a couch nearby.

“Hughes,” she said quickly. “What’s ship’s status?”

“Status nominal, sir. But it’s a good thing I had my goggles on! What the devil happened?”

“P-laser got loose. Continue as is. Hold her steady about a klick from the herd. I’ll be back to you soon.” She released the mike and raised her head to shout. “Chen! Dubrowsky! Report!” She peered about in the dimness.

“Over here, skipper!” It was Chen’s voice. Helene cursed and tore off the goggles. Chen was over beyond the hatchway. He knelt over a figure on the deck.

“It’s Dubrowsky,” the man said. “He’s dead. Fried through the eyes.”

Dr. Martine cowered behind Fagin’s thick trunk. The Kanten whistled softly as Helene hurried over.

“Are you two okay?”

Fagin let out a long note that sounded vaguely like a slurred “yes.” Martine nodded once, jerkily, but she stayed clutching Fagin’s trunk. Her goggles were skewed over her face. Helene took them off.

“Come on, Doctor. You have patients.” She pulled at Martine’s arm. “Chen! Go to my office and get the aid-kit! On the double!”

Martine started to get up, then sagged back shaking her head.

Helene gritted her teeth and hauled up on the arm she held, suddenly, snapping the older woman upwards with a gasp. Martine staggered to her feet.

Helene slapped her once across the face. “Wake up, Doctor! You’ll help me with these men or so help me I’ll kick your teeth in!” She took Martine’s arm and supported her across the few meters to where Chief Donaldson and Jacob Demwa lay.

Jacob moaned and began to stir. Helene felt her heart rise when he took his arm away from his face. The burns were superficial and they hadn’t touched the eyes. Jacob had his goggles on.

She steered Martine over next to Donaldson and made her sit. The chief engineer was badly seared along the left side of his face. The left lens of his goggles was smashed.

Chen arrived on the run, carrying the aid-kit.

Dr. Martine turned away from Donaldson and shuddered. Then she looked up and saw the crewman with the medical bag. She held out her hands for it.

“Will you need help, Doctor?” Helene asked.

Martine spread instruments on the deck. She shook her head without looking up.

“No. Be quiet.”

Helen called Chen over. “Go look for LaRoque and Culla. Report when you’ve found them.” The man ran off.

Jacob moaned again and tried to rise up on his elbows. Helene got a cloth from the fountain nearby and wet it. She knelt by Jacob and pulled on his shoulders to get his head onto her lap.

He winced as she dabbed gently at his wounds.

“Oh…” he moaned and brought a hand to the top of his head. “I should’ve known better. His ancestors were tree swingers. He’d have to have a chimp’s strength. And he looks so weak!”

“Can you tell me what happened?” she asked softly.

Jacob grunted as he groped beneath his back with his left hand. He tugged on something a couple of times. Finally he pulled out the large bag the protection goggles had come in. He looked at it, then tossed it away.

“My head feels as if it’s been sandblasted,” he said. He pushed himself up into sitting position, wavered for a moment with his hands on his head, then he let them drop.

“Culla wouldn’t happen to be lying unconscious around here, would he? I was hoping I turned into a fighting fool after he knocked me dizzy, but I guess I just blacked out.”

“I don’t know where Culla is,” Helene said. “Now what…?”

Chen’s voice boomed over the intercom.

“Skipper? I’ve found LaRoque. He’s at degrees two-forty. He’s okay. In fact, he didn’t even know anything was wrong!”

Jacob moved over next to Dr. Martins and began to talk to her urgently. Helene stood up and went to the intercom next to the food center. “Have you seen Culla?”

“Nossir, not a sign anywhere. He must be on flip-side.” Chen’s voice dropped. “I had the impression there was a fight going on. Do you know what happened?”

“I’ll get back to you when I know something. Meanwhile you’d better relieve Hughes.” Jacob joined her by the intercom. “Donaldson will be all right, but he’ll need a new eye. Listen, Helene, I’m going to have to go after Culla. Lend me one of your men, will you? Then you’d better get us out of here as fast as you can.”

She whirled. “You just killed one of my men! Dubrowsky’s dead! Donaldson is blinded, and now you want me to send someone else to help you harass poor Culla some more? What madness is this?”

“I didn’t kill anyone, Helene.”

“I saw you, you clumsy oaf! You bumped the p-laser and it went crazy! So did you! Why were you attacking Culla?”

“Helene…” Jacob winced. He brought a hand to his head. “There’s no time to explain. You’ve got to get us out of here. There’s no telling what he’ll do down there now that we know.”

“Explain first!”

“I… I bumped the laser on purpose… I…” Helene’s shipsuit fit so snugly that Jacob would never have thought she had the snug little stun gun that appeared in her hand. “Go on, Jacob,” she said evenly.

“…He was watching me. I knew if I showed a sign I’d caught on, he could blind us all in an instant. I sent you away to get you clear and then went after the goggles bag. I kicked the laser free to confuse him… laser light all over the place…”

“And killed and maimed my men!”

Jacob drew himself together. “Listen, you little nit!” He towered over her. “I turned that beam down! It might blind but it wouldn’t burn!

“Now if you don’t believe me, knock me out! Strap me in! Only get us out of here fast, before Culla kills us all!”

“Culla…”

“His eyes, damnit! Coumarin? His ‘dietary supplement’ is a dye used in lasers! He killed Dubrowsky when he tried to help me and Donaldson!

“He was lying about that laser plant back on his home planet! The Pring have their own source of coherent light! He’s been projecting the ‘adult’ type Sun Ghosts all along! And… my god!” Jacob punched at the air.

“…if his projector is subtle enough to display fake ‘Ghosts’ on the inside of a Sunship shell, it must be good enough to interact with the optical inputs of those Library designed computers! He programmed the computers to tag LaRoque as a Probationer. And… and I was next to him when he programmed Jeff’s ship to self-destruct! He was feeding in commands all the time I was admiring the pretty lights!”

Helene backed away, shaking her head. Jacob took a step toward her, looming large with fists tight, but his face was a mask of self-reproach.

“Why was Culla always the first to spot the humanoid Ghosts? Why were there none seen during the time he was with Kepler on Earth? Why didn’t I think, before this, about Culla’s reasons for volunteering to have his ‘retina’ read during the identity search!”

The words were coming too fast. Helene’s brow knit with tension as she tried to think.

Jacob’s eyes pleaded. “Helene, you’ve got to believe me.”

She hesitated, then cried out, “Oh shit!” and threw herself at the intercom.

“Chen! Get us out of here! Never mind strap-in warning, just put on max thrust and crank up the time-compression! I want to see black sky before I blink twice!”

“Aye sir!” came the reply.

The ship surged upagainst them as the compensation fields were temporarily overcome, sending both Helene and Jacob staggering. The Commandant held onto the intercom.

“All hands, keep your goggles on at all times from now on. Everybody please strap in as quick as you can. Hughes, report to the loop-hatch on the double!”

Outside, the toruses began to pass by more rapidly. As each beast fell below the rim of the deck, its rims flashed brightly as if bidding them adieu.

“I should have caught on too,” Helene said dismally. “Instead I turned off the P-laser and probably let him get away.”

Jacob kissed her quickly, hard enough to leave her lips tingling.

“You didn’t know. I’d have done the same thing in your shoes.”

She touched her lips and stared past him at Dubrowsky’s body. “You sent me away because…”

“Captain,” Chen’s voice interrupted. “I’m having trouble getting the time-compression off automatic. Can I keep Hughes here to help? We’ve also just lost maser link with Hermes.”

Jacob shrugged. “First the maser link to keep word from getting out, then time-compression, then the gravity drive, finally the stasis. I guess the last step is to blow the shields, unless the other steps are sufficient. They should be.”

Helene toggled the intercom. “Negative, Chen. I want Hughes now! Do what you can alone.” She cut the switch.

“I’m going with you.”

“No you aren’t,” he said. He put his goggles back on and picked up the bag from the floor. “If Culla gets to step three we’re cooked, literally. But if I can stop him part-way you’re the only one who’d stand a chance of piloting us out. Now please lend me that gun, it could be useful.”

Helene handed it over. At this stage argument would be ridiculous. Jacob was in charge. She had no ideas of her own.

The quiet thrumming of the ship changed its rhythm, becoming a low, uneven hum.

Helens answered Jacob’s questioning glance. “It’s the time-compression. He’s already started slowing us down. In more ways than one, we haven’t very much time.”

25. A TRAPPED STATE

Jacob crouched in the hatchway, ready to dive back behind the combing at the sight of a tall, gangling alien. So far, so good. Culla hadn’t been in the gravity loop.

The turnaround route to flip-side, the only route, might have been a good place for an ambush. But Jacob wasn’t particularly surprised that Culla wasn’t there, for two reasons.

The first was tactical. Culla’s weapon operated on line-of-sight. The loop curved very tightly, so the humans could approach within a few meters without being spotted. An object thrown around the loop would travel most of the way with undiminished velocity. Jacob was now sure of this. He and Hughes had thrown several knives from the ship’s galley when they entered the loop. They found them near the flip-side exit in a puddle of ammonia from the liquitubes they’d squeezed ahead of them as they walked the topsyturvy passage.

Culla could have been waiting just beyond the door, but there was another reason he had to leave his, rear undefended. He had only a limited amount of time before the Sunship reached a high orbit. After they got into free space the humans “would be safe from the tossing of the chromospheric storms, and the tough, reflecting physical shell of the ship could deflect enough of the heat of the Sun to keep them alive until help came.

So Culla had to finish them, and himself, off quickly. Jacob felt sure the Pring specialist was by the computer input, ninety degrees around the dome to the right, using his laser eyes to slowly reprogram past the machine’s safeguards.

Why he was doing it was a question that would have to wait.

Hughes picked up the knives. With the bag, some liquitubes, and Helene’s little stunner, they composed their armory.

Classically, since the alternative was death for all of them, the answer would be for one man to sacrifice himself so the other could finish Culla off.

He and Hughes could carefully time their approach from different directions to surprise Culla at the same moment. Or one man could come in front and the other, aim the stunner from over his shoulder.

But neither plan would work. Their opponent could literally kill a man as fast as he could look at him. Unlike the faked “adult” Sun Ghost projections, which were continuous output, Culla’s killer bolts were discharges. Jacob wished he could remember how many he’d fired off during the fight on topside… or at what repeat frequency. It probably didn’t matter. Culla had two eyes and two enemies. One bolt each would probably suffice.

Worst of all, they couldn’t be sure that Culla’s holographic imaging ability wouldn’t enable him to locate them the instant they stepped out onto the floor, from reflections off the inner shell. He probably couldn’t hurt them with reflections, but that was poor compensation.

If there weren’t so damned much attenuation during the internal bouncing of the beam they could have tried to disable the alien with the P-laser, by letting it sweep the entire ship while the humans and Fagin crowded into the. gravity-loop.

Jacob cursed and wondered what was keeping them with the P-laser. Next to him Hughes mumbled softly into a wall intercom. He turned to Jacob. “They’re ready!” he said.

Thanks to their goggles they were spared most of the pain when the dome outside burst with light. Still it took a few moments to blink away tears and adapt to the brightness.

Commandant deSilva had, presumably with Dr. Martine’s help, dragged the P-laser to a new position near the rim of the upper deck. If her calculations were right the beam should hit the side of the dome on flip-side exactly where the computer input was. Unfortunately, the complexity of the figure needed to go from point A to B, through the narrow gap at the edge of the deck, meant that the beam probably wouldn’t harm Culla.

It did startle him though. At the instant the beam came on, while Jacob was squeezing his eyes shut, they heard a sudden chattering and sounds of movement far to the right.

When his vision cleared, Jacob saw a thin tracery of bright lines hanging in the air. The passage of the P-laser beam left a track in the small amount of dust in the air. That was fortunate. It would help them avoid it.

“Intercom on max?” he asked quickly.

Hughes gave thumbs up.

“Okay, let’s go!”

The P-laser was randomly putting out colors in the blue-green. They hoped it would confuse reflections from the inner shell.

He gathered his legs and counted, “One, two. Go!”

Jacob dashed out across the open space and dove behind one of the hulking recording machines at the rim of the deck. He heard Hughes land hard, two machines clockwise from him.

The man waved once when he glanced back. “Nothing over here!” he whispered harshly. Jacob took a look around the corner of his own machine, using a mirror from the aid-kit, which had been smeared with grease. Hughes had another mirror, from Martine’s purse.

Culla wasn’t in sight.

Between them, he and his partner could survey about three-fifths of the deck. The computer input was on the other side of the dome, just out of Hughes’ view. Jacob would have to take the long way around, darting from one recording machine to another.

The Sunship’s shell glowed in spots where the P-laser beam glanced off it. The colors shifted constantly. Otherwise, the red and pink miasma of the chromosphere surrounded them. They had left the big filament minutes before, and the herd of toroids with it, by now a hundred kilometers below.

Below was actually right over Jacob’s head. The photosphere, with the Big Spot in the center made a great, flat, endless, fiery ceiling above him, spicules hung like stalactites.

He gathered his legs beneath him and took off, bent over and facing away from any possible ambush.

He leapt over the P-laser beam where its path was traced in floating dust particles, and dove behind the next machine. Quickly he eased the mirror out to look at the territory now exposed.

Culla wasn’t in sight.

Neither was Hughes. He whistled two short notes in the brief code they’d agreed upon. All clear. He heard one note, the fellow’s reply.

He had to duck under the beam the next time. All the way across the narrow distance his skin crawled, anticipating a searing bolt of light along his Flank.

He stumbled behind the machine and caught hold of it to steady himself, breathing heavily. That wasn’t right! He shouldn’t be so tired already. Something was wrong.

Jacob swallowed once then began to slide the mirror out along the counter-clockwise edge of the machine.

Pain lanced into his fingertips and he dropped the mirror with a cry. He stopped just short of popping the hand in his mouth, and held it, instead, a few inches away, his mouth open in agony.

Automatically, he started to lay over a light pain relief trance. The red pokers started to fade as the fingers seemed to grow more distant. Then the flow of relief stopped. It was like a tug of war. He could only accomplish so much; a counter pressure resisted the hypnosis with equal strength no matter how hard he concentrated.

Another of Hyde’s tricks. Well there was no time to dicker with him… whatever the hell he wanted. He looked at the hand, now that the pain was barely bearable. The index and fourth fingers were badly fried. The others were less damaged.

He managed to whistle a short code to Hughes. It was time to put his plan into effect, the only plan with any real chance of success.

Their only chance lay in getting into space. Time-compression was frozen on automatic — the first thing Culla took care of after the maser link — their subjective time would pretty closely match the actual time it took to leave the chromosphere.

Since assaulting Culla was almost certainly futile, the best way to delay the alien’s murder-suicide would be to talk to him.

Jacob took a couple of breaths as he leaned back against the holo-recorder, careful to keep his ears awake. Culla was always a noisy walker. That was his best hope against out and out attack by the Pring. If Culla made too much sound out in the open, Jacob might get a chance to use the stunner he clutched in his good hand. It had a wide beam and wouldn’t take much aiming.

“Culla!” he shouted. “Don’t you think this has gone far enough? Why don’t you come out now and we’ll talk!”

He listened. There was a faint buzzing, as if Culla’s mashies were chattering softly behind the thick prehensile lips. During the fight topside, half of the problem facing him and- Donaldson had been avoiding the flashing white grinders.

“Culla!” he repeated. “I know it’s stupid to judge an alien by your own species’ values, but I really thought you were a friend. You owe us an explanation! Talk to us! If you’re acting under Bubbacub’s orders, you can surrender and I swear we’ll all say you put up a hell of a fight!”

The buzzing grew louder. There was a brief shuffle of footsteps. One, two, three… but that was all. Not enough to get a fix on.

“Jacob, I am shorry,” Culla’s voice carried softly across the deck.

“You musht be told, before, we die, but firsht I ashk that you have that lasher turned off. It hurtsh!”

“Culla, so does my hand.”

The Pririg sounded woebegone. “I am sho, sho, shorry, Jacob. Pleash undershtand that you are my friend. It ish partly for your shpeciesh that I do thish.

“Theshe are neceshary crimesh, Jacob. I am only glad that death ish near sho that I may be free of memory.”

Jacob was astonished by the alien’s sophistry. He had never expected such sophomore whinings from Culla, whatever his reasons for what he’d done. He was about to frame a reply when Helene deSilva’s voice boomed over the intercom.

“Jacob? Can you hear me? The gravity thrust is deteriorating fast. We’re losing headway.”

What she didn’t say was the threat. If something wasn’t done soon they’d begin the long fall toward the photosphere, a fall from which they’d never return.

Once in the grip of the convection cells, the ship would be pulled downward into the stellar core. If there was a ship left, by then.

“You shee, Jacob,” Culla said. “To delay me will do no good. It ish already done. I will shtay to make shertain you cannot correct it.

“But pleashe, let ush talk until the end. I do not wish to die ash enemiesh.”

Jacob stared out into the wispy, hydrogen-red atmosphere of the Sun. Tendrils of fiery gas were still floating ‘downwards’ (up, to him), past the ship, but that could be a function of the motion of the gas in this area at this time. Certainly they were going by much less quickly. It could be that the ship was already falling.

“Your dischovery of my talent and my hoax wash most ashtute, Jacob. You combined many obshcure cluesh to find the anshwer! Tying in the background of my race wash a brilliant shtroke!

“Tell me, although I avoided the rim detectorsh with my phantomsh, didn’t it throw you off that they shometimesh appeared on topshide when I wash on flip-shide?”

Jacob was trying to think. He had the cool side of the stun gun against his cheek. It felt good, but it wasn’t helping him come up with ideas. And he had to spare some of his attention to talk to Culla.

“I never bothered to think about it, Culla. I suppose you just leaned over and beamed through the transparent deck-suspension field. That’d explain why the image looked refracted. It was actually reflected, at an angle, inside the shell.”

Actually that was a valid clue. Jacob wondered why he’d missed it.

And the bright blue light, during his deep trance in Baja! It happened just before he awoke to see Culla standing there! The Eatee must have taken a hologram of him! What a way to get to know somebody and never forget his face!

“Culla,” he said slowly. “Not that I’m one to hold a grudge or anything, but were you responsible for my crazy behavior at the end of the last dive?”

There was a pause. Then Culla spoke. His lisp was getting worse.

“Yesh, Jacob. I am shorry, but you were getting too inquishitive. I hoped to dishcredit you. I failed.”

“But how…”

“I lishtened to Dr. Martine talk about the effect of glare on humansh, Jacob!”

The Pring almost shouted. For the first time in Jacob’s memory, Culla had interrupted somebody. “I ekshperi-mented on Doctor Kepler for months! Den on La-Roque and Jeff… den on you. I ushed a narrow diffracted beam. No one could shee it, but it unfocushed your thoughtsh!

“I did not know what you would do. But I knew it would be embarrasshing. Again, I am shorry. It wash neceshary!”

They had definitely stopped rising. The big filament that they had left only a few minutes before loomed over Jacob’s head. High streamers twisted and curled up toward the ship, like grasping fingers.

Jacob had been trying to find a way, but his imagination was blocked by a powerful barrier.

All right! I give up!

He called on his neurosis to offer its terms. What the hell did the damned thing want of him?

He shook his head. He’d have to invoke the emergency clause. Hyde was going to have to come out and become part of him, like in the bad old days. Like when he chased down LaRoque on Mercury, and when he broke into the Photo Lab. He got ready to go into the trance.

“Why Culla. Tell me why you did all this!”

Not that it mattered. Maybe. Hughes was listening. Perhaps Helene was recording. Jacob was too busy to care.

Resistance! In the non-linear, non-orthogonal coordinates of thought he sifted feelings and gestalts through a sieve. To whatever extent the old automatic systems still worked, he set them off to do their jobs.

Slowly, the window dressing and camouflage was stripped away and he came face to face with his other half.

The battlements, unscalable in every past siege, were even more formidable now. The earthen breastworks had been replaced by stone. The abatis was made of sharpened needles, slender and twenty miles long. At the top of the highest tower a flag rippled. The pennant read “Loyalty.” It flew above two stakes, on each of which a head was impaled.

One head he recognized at once. It was his own. The blood that, dripped from the severed neck still glistened. The expression was one of remorse.

The other head set him shivering. It was Helene’s. Her face was streaked and pockmarked, and as he watched the eyes fluttered weakly. The head was still alive.

But why! Why this rage against Helene? And why the overtones of suicide… this unwillingness to join with him to create the near ubermensch he once had been?

If Culla decided to attack now, he’d be helpless. His ears were filled with the cry of a whistling wind. There was a roar of jets and then the sound of someone falling… the sound of someone calling as she fell past him.

And for the first time he could make out her words.

“Jake! Watch that first step… !”

Is that all? Then why all the fuss over it? Why the months trying to drag out what turned out to be Tania’s last ironic dig?

Of course. His neurosis was letting him see, now that death was imminent, that the hidden words had been another red herring. Hyde was hiding something else. It was…

Guilt.

He knew he carried a burden of it after the affair on the Vanilla Needle, but how much he’d never realized. He now saw how sick this Jekyll and Hyde arrangement he’d been living with really was. Instead of slowly healing the trauma of a painful loss, he’d sealed off an artificial entity, to grow and feed on him and on his shame for having let Tania fall… for the supreme arrogance of the man who, on that crazy day twenty miles high, thought he could do two things at once.

It had been just another form of arrogance… a belief that he could bypass the normal, human way of recovering from grief, the cycle of pain and transcendency by which the billions of his fellow human beings coped when each suffered a loss. That and the comfort of closeness to other people.

And now he was trapped. The meaning of the pennant on the battlements was clear now. In his sickness he’d thought to expiate part of his guilt by demonstrations of loyalty to the person he’d failed. Not overt loyalty, but loyalty deep within… a sick loyalty based on witholding himself from everybody… all the while convinced that he was all right since he’d had lovers!

No wonder Hyde hated Helene! No wonder he wanted Jacob Demwa dead as well!

Tania would never have approved of you, he told it. But it wasn’t listening. It had its own logic and had no use for his.

Hell, she’d have loved Helene!

It didn’t do any good. The barrier was firm. He opened his eyes.

The red of the chromosphere had deepened. They were in the filament now. A flash of color, seen even through his goggles, sent him glancing to the left.

It was a toroid. They were back amidst the herd.

As he watched, several more drifted past, their rims festooned with bright designs. They spun like mad doughnuts, oblivious to the peril of the Sunship.

“Jacob, you have shaid nothing,” Culla’s droning, lisping voice had become background. At the mention of his name Jacob paid attention.

“Shurely you have shome opinion on my motivesh. Cannot you shee that de greater good will come of dish… not only for my shpecies but for yoursh and your Clientsh ash well?”

Jacob shook his head vigorously to clear it. The Hyde-induced drowsiness was something he had to fight! The only silver lining was that his hand no longer hurt.

“Culla, I must think about this for a little while. Can we retire a ways and confer? I can pick up some food for you and maybe we can work something out.”

There was a pause. Then Culla spoke slowly.

“You are very tricky, Jacob. I am tempted but now I shee dat it will be better if you and your friend stay shtill. In fact. I will make certain. If either of you movesh I will ‘shee’ him.”

Numbly, Jacob wondered what was so “tricky” about offering the alien food. Why had that idea popped into his head?

They were falling faster now. Overhead the herd of toruses stretched” toward the ominous wall of the photosphere. The nearest shone in blues and greens as they swept past. The colors faded with distance. The farthest beasts looked like tiny dim wedding rings, each poised on a tiny flicker of green light.

There was movement among the nearest magne-tovores. As the ship fell, one after another moved aside and “downward” from Jacob’s upside-down perspective. Once a flash of green filled the Sunship as a tail-laser swept over them. The fact that they weren’t destroyed meant that the automatic screens were still working.

Outside, a fluttering shape shot past Jacob, from over his head out, past the deck at his feet. Then another rippling apparition appeared, lingering for a moment outside the shell near him, its body slick with iridescent colors. Then it sped upward, out of sight.

The Sun Ghosts were gathering. Perhaps the Sun-ship’s headlong fall had finally piqued their curiosity.

They had passed the largest part of the herd by now. There was a cluster of large magnetovores just overhead, in their line of descent. Tiny bright herdsmen danced around the group. Jacob hoped they’d get out of the way. No sense in taking anyone else with them. The incandescent trail of the ship’s Refrigerator Laser cut dangerously close.

Jacob gathered himself together. There was nothing else to do. He and Hughes would have to try a frontal assault on Culla. He whistled a code, two short and two long. There was a pause and then there was an answer. The other man was ready.

He’d wait until the first sound. They’d agreed that, when they were close enough, any attack with any chance of success would have to come the instant any noise was made, before Culla could be alerted. Since Hughes had farther to go, presumably, he’d move first.

He tensed into a crouch and forced himself to concentrate only on the attack. The stunner rested in the sweaty palm of his left hand. He ignored the distracting tremors that erupted from an isolated part of his own mind.

A sound, like someone falling, came from somewhere to the right. Jacob stepped out from behind the machine, pressing the firing stud of the stunner at the same instant.

No bolt of light greeted him. Culla wasn’t there. One of the precious stunner charges was gone.

He ran forward as fast as he could. If he could catch the alien with his back turned to deal with Hughes…

The lighting was changing. As he ran just a few steps the red brightness of the photosphere overhead was swiftly replaced by a blue-green shine from above. Jacob spared the briefest of glances overhead as he dashed forward. The light came from toruses. The huge Solarian beasts were coming up fast from below the Sunship on a collision course.

Alarms rang, and Helene deSilva’s voice came on, loudly, with a warning. As the blueness grew brighter, Jacob dove over a trace made by the P-laser beam in the dusty air, and landed just two meters away from Culla.

Just beyond the Pring, the crewman Hughes knelt on the ground, holding up bloody hands, his knives scattered on the ground. He stared up at Culla dully, expecting the coup de grace.

Jacob raised the stunner as Culla swiveled, warned by the sound of his arrival. For the briefest of instants Jacob thought he’d made it as he pressed down on the firing stud.

Then his entire left hand erupted in agony. A spasm flung it up and the gun flew away. For a moment the deck seemed to sway, then his vision cleared and Culla was standing before him, eyes dull. The Pring’s mashies were now fully exposed, waving at the ends of the tentacular “lips.”

“I am shorry, Jacob.” The alien slurred so badly Jacob could barely make out the words. “It musht be thish way.”

The Eatee planned to finish him off with his cleavers! Jacob stumbled back in fear and disgust. Culla followed, the mashies clacking together slowly, powerfully with the rhythm of his footsteps.

A great sense of resignation washed over Jacob, a feeling of defeat and imminent death. It took the distance out of his backward steps. The throbbing in his hand meant nothing next to the closeness of extinction.

“No!” he shouted hoarsely. He launched himself forward, head down, toward Culla.

At that instant Helene’s voice came on again and the blueness overhead took over everything. There was a distant humming and then a powerful force lifted them off the floor, into the air above the violently heaving deck.