Strangers

2

Scott decided they’d start their first full day in Thussock with a trip into town. Despite their instinctive protestations – more for effect than anything else, just making their feelings known – both girls agreed to come. Other than cleaning and unpacking, there wasn’t much else to do; the TV wasn’t set up yet, and they’d no Internet connection. Scott had promised to get it sorted in the week but Tammy didn’t know if she’d last that long. Less than twenty-four hours in and she was struggling with life offline. It felt like solitary confinement. The rest of the world continued to chat, message, share and update outside of her little bubble of disconnection, making her feel like she’d been blocked. Unfriended.

Another bloody WELCOME TO THUSSOCK sign. They were taking the piss now, Tammy thought as they drove along the main road from the house into town. Scott pulled up outside a shed-like wooden bus-shelter. Michelle jumped out and checked the timetable for times and prices to school. ‘I think we’ll drive you in for the first week or so,’ she told them when she got back into the car. ‘Just until we’ve all got our bearings. The buses seem really infrequent. Don’t want you two being late or getting stranded.’

‘Oh, that’s too weird,’ Phoebe said unexpectedly.

‘What, the buses?’ Tammy asked, confused.

‘No… over there. See that house?’

Tammy craned her neck and saw a bungalow with a pea-green front door and an over-fussy garden. It was nothing special. As unremarkable as the rest of Thussock. ‘What about it?’

‘Watch the woman.’

All of them, George included, now watched as an obese woman waddled out from around the side of the small house. She was wearing a long and distinctly unflattering cerise summer dress which clung to all the wrong bulges. Her bleached hair was cropped short. ‘Don’t stare,’ Michelle warned, although she was as guilty as the rest of them.

‘What about her?’ Scott asked.

‘Just keep watching…’

A car reversed out of a pre-fabricated garage adjacent to the bungalow. As the oversized woman in pink lowered herself into the passenger seat, an identically obese woman in blue got out and shut the garage door. ‘Identical twins,’ Michelle said. ‘That’s not weird.’

‘It is when you live together and you’re wearing the exact same outfits at their age.’

‘Don’t be so rude. I’m sure they’re both lovely.’

The family watched, strangely spellbound, as the sisters pulled off their drive. The twin in the passenger seat saw them watching and gave them a nod of the head and a wave. ‘Phoebe’s right,’ Scott said when they’d gone. ‘That was weird.’

They followed the car into town. The twins turned off when they reached a small church hall, barely noticeable tucked away in the middle of a row of houses.

‘Where exactly are we going?’ Tammy asked.

‘Thought we’d find your school first, then see if we can get some lunch,’ Scott told her.

‘Is it going to take long?’

‘As long as it takes. Stop moaning.’

She slumped back in her seat. And this is what my life has been reduced to: driving to look at a school on a Sunday morning. Her friends Katie and Max had been planning to go to Merry Hill today, she remembered. Some shopping, then on to see that film they’d all been talking about last week. Most of her mates back home probably weren’t even awake yet, still sleeping off the effects of the night before.

Thussock High School was a curious mix of the old and the very old; about eighty per cent decrepit to twenty per cent ancient, Tammy decided. School’s school, Scott had told them both, spouting bullshit as usual. Did he ever stop to listen to the crap he came out with? It’s not where you go, it’s what you do when you’re there that matters, he said. You make your own chances, that was one of his favourite nuggets of shite. Well, moving to Thussock would blow his theories out of the water, because Tammy knew beyond any doubt that the schooling here wasn’t going to be as good as she’d had back in Redditch. For a start, the course options were severely limited. She’d had to choose A levels she hadn’t really wanted, and she was already concerned that would have an impact on her university choices in a couple of years time. She decided it didn’t really matter what she went on to study at uni anymore. For Tammy, the further in further education now referred to the distance she could get from Thussock.

‘What do you reckon?’ Phoebe asked, standing at the fence alongside her, both of them gripping the railings like prisoners.

‘Pretty grim. Matches the rest of this shitty town perfectly.’

‘It might be all right.’

‘It might not.’

A long, straight road ran through the centre of a large grey playground, stretching from the gate, deep into the main hub of the school. It looked like it had been built in the sixties: all concrete grey and sharp corners; modular and geometric; ugly, out-dated and drab. There were four temporary classrooms at the far end of the playground, and it was clear from the weathering of the flimsy-looking buildings that they’d proved to be far less temporary than had originally been envisaged.

Behind the bulk of the school buildings, visible in a gap between two blocks, they could see a more recently built leisure centre. Its cream, corrugated metal walls were a stark contrast to the rest of the campus. Tammy wondered if it had a fitness suite and a pool like the college she should have been starting at in Bromsgrove next week? She wasn’t going to get her hopes up.

‘We ready to make a move, ladies?’ Scott shouted from the car. They ambled back. ‘Hungry?’

‘Starving,’ Phoebe said.

‘Then let’s go and see what we can find.’

They left the car outside the Co-op supermarket, then walked the length of the high street. Scott and Michelle were at the front, Michelle pushing George in his buggy, while the two girls followed at a distance. Michelle looked back at them. ‘You two okay?’

‘Fine,’ they both answered, though the tone of their voices said otherwise.

‘Do you think they’re going to be all right?’ Michelle asked, turning back to talk to Scott.

‘They will be. It’s early days. Bit of a culture shock for them. Tammy’s just sulking as usual.’

‘Bit of a culture shock for all of us.’

‘It’s not that bad.’

‘I didn’t say it was. It’s going to be very different here, that’s all.’

‘You all need to keep open minds. If you go into things with a positive attitude, they’ll usually work out.’

‘Is that right?’

‘Yes it is. That’s why I’m keen to get started on the house.’

Scott stopped walking suddenly and looked around.

‘What’s up?’

‘That’s it, I think,’ he said. ‘I think we’ve done the entire place.’

‘We can’t have.’

Tammy and Phoebe caught up. ‘Why have we stopped?’ Tammy asked.

‘Because we’ve reached the end of the road,’ Scott told her.

‘You can say that again.’

‘Didn’t see many places to eat,’ Michelle said.

‘There was the pub,’ Scott suggested.

‘Didn’t like the look of it.’

‘Or the name,’ Tammy interrupted. ‘Fancy calling a pub The Black Boy. Sounds racist. Sinister.’

‘There was a sheepdog on the sign,’ Phoebe said. ‘Probably named after a dog who saved a farmer, something like that.’

‘There was a chip shop back a way,’ Michelle said.

‘You can’t have chips for Sunday dinner,’ Phoebe protested. ‘It’s not right. When we’re with Dad, Nanny always cooks a roast dinner on Sunday.’ Her voice cracked with emotion, an unexpected twinge of sadness taking her by surprise. She wished she was there now.

‘Well you’re not at your nanny’s today, are you?’ Scott said, oblivious. ‘Looks like it’s chips or nothing.’

‘We could head back to the supermarket,’ Michelle said. ‘Get something to eat from there.’

‘Too cold for a picnic,’ Tammy said. ‘The sun’s gone in.’

‘Then we can just take stuff back to the house.’

‘What was the point of coming out then?’

‘Give it a rest, Tam. Stop being so bloody argumentative all the time. We wanted you to see the school.’

‘Why bother? We’ll see it tomorrow, anyway. We should have stayed at the house and saved all the effort.’

‘What effort?’ Scott said. ‘Haven’t seen anyone else putting any effort in. Come on, let’s go.’

Phoebe wasn’t moving. ‘You said we were having a Sunday dinner.’

‘I know, but—’

‘But you said…’

‘What am I supposed to do? Just magic one up? Pull one out of my backside?’

‘You said…’

Frustrated, Scott turned and started back towards the supermarket, walking at double pace. ‘I’ll get you your bloody dinner,’ he shouted. ‘Just stop being so bloody miserable.’

He was halfway back to the supermarket before the rest of them moved. ‘I’ll go and see what he’s doing,’ Michelle said. ‘Make sure we get something decent to eat.’

‘Bloke’s an idiot,’ Tammy said.

Michelle’s shoulders slumped. ‘Give it a rest, will you? I’m stuck between a rock and a hard place here. Scott’s trying, you know. This hasn’t been easy on him either.’

‘Maybe he should have tried a little earlier. If he had, maybe we wouldn’t have lost the house.’

‘Tam, don’t go there…’

‘But it’s true, Mum, you know it is.’

‘And going on about it isn’t going to help anyone. We are where we are.’

‘Will you stop saying that.’

‘Just deal with it. Both of you. Do me a favour and look after George. I’ll go and see what Scott’s up to.’

End of conversation. Michelle handed George’s buggy to Phoebe then went into the supermarket.

‘She always does that,’ Tammy said.

‘Does what?’

‘Walks away when she doesn’t want to hear what someone’s saying. Does my head in.’

The sisters sat down on the stone wall around the edge of the car park, their brother parked between them.

‘That school looked all right, actually,’ Phoebe said. Tammy just looked at her.

‘You serious? You must be off your head, Pheeb. It looked like a fucking hole, just like the rest of this dump of a place.’

‘It is Sunday though, Tam. Everywhere’s quiet on a Sunday.’

‘You all right, girls?’ an unexpected voice asked. They turned and saw a group of three lads and a girl standing on the other side of the wall. Two of the boys, Tammy quickly decided, were nothing special: all bad hair, cheap sports gear and exaggerated swagger. The one in the middle though, the tallest of the three, the only one who wasn’t smoking, was quite cute. But she’d already decided there was an insurmountable difference between a quite cute boy from Thussock and a quite cute boy from Redditch. These people were alien to her.

‘We’ve just moved here,’ Phoebe said and Tammy glared and shushed her. Too much information.

‘Never a good move,’ the smallest of the boys said, his T-shirt flapping against his willowy frame in the wind. He looked colder than he was letting on. He had a sharp nose and small eyes and looked like he was scowling. ‘Should’a stayed where you was. Fuck all happens here.’

Tammy struggled to work out what it was he’d just said. His accent was so strong, so unfathomable, that she had to replay the sounds over in her head a couple of times before she could make out the individual words and un-jumble them. ‘We didn’t ask to come here,’ she said, not wanting to engage, but not wanting anyone to think she was here through choice either.

The girl leant over the wall and peered down at George. ‘That your kid?’ she asked.

‘What do you think?’ Tammy said, sounding more aggressive than she’d intended.

‘Don’t know, that’s why I asked.’

‘No, he’s our brother.’

‘He’s cute,’ she said, apparently unperturbed. ‘I’m Heather.’

‘Hey.’

‘I’m Jamie,’ the tallest lad said, introducing himself. ‘This here’s Joel and Sean.’

Tammy just nodded and grunted something that was hardly even a word. She turned back around to emphasise her disinterest and stared at the Co-op, hoping her mum would reappear and get them away from here. The automatic doors slid open and Scott emerged with a bulging carrier bag in either hand. For once she was relieved to see him. She could already sense the crowd behind her beginning to slope away, all cigarette smoke and put-on attitude. She glanced over her shoulder and made sure they’d gone.

‘Were they giving you any trouble?’ Scott asked.

‘No,’ she replied, indignant. Even if they were, she didn’t need his help to deal with them.

Michelle watched the group disappear. She hated herself for sounding like such a snob, but she didn’t like the idea of her girls mixing with kids like that. And she knew that attitude was unfair and probably wholly unwarranted, but for now that was just how it was. She wondered if she’d have felt different if she’d seen the same kids in Redditch?

‘So what’s for dinner?’ Phoebe asked, more interested in her stomach than anything else.

‘All kinds of crap,’ Scott said. ‘Mostly junk food, stuff that’s really bad for you. That okay?’

‘Perfect.’

‘That’s what I thought you’d say.’

They walked back to the car which was parked all alone, numerous empty bays on either side. Michelle strapped George into his seat while Scott collapsed the buggy and loaded it into the boot with the shopping.

‘Wait up! ’Scuse me, sir!’

Scott looked around and saw one of the Co-op staff running towards him, waving furiously, already out of breath despite the relatively short distance he’d covered. He was in his late forties or early fifties, Scott thought, plump, and with a ruddy complexion and a shock of wild auburn hair which was just on the wrong side of being under control. He stopped short of Scott and stared at him with wide eyes, made to look even wider by the circular frames and magnifying lenses of his glasses. Scott was immediately on guard. He’d clocked this particular joker in the store, stacking shelves and collecting up trolleys and baskets with unnecessary enthusiasm.

‘What’s the problem?’

‘There’s no problem.’

The man, whose name was Graham according the name badge clipped onto his tie, just stood there.

‘What then?’

‘Eh?’

‘What do you want?’

‘Oh, right,’ Graham said, remembering why he was there. ‘You left your wallet in the shop.’ He handed it over. ‘Good job I was looking out for you, eh?’

Scott instinctively checked his pockets, then took his wallet from Graham’s outstretched hand. He checked his bank cards and counted the notes at the back.

‘It’s all there,’ Graham said.

‘Cheers.’

‘Don’t mention it,’ he said, and with that he was off again. He jogged back to the shop, suddenly veering off to the left to round up a rogue trolley he’d somehow missed when he’d last checked outside a few minutes earlier.

‘Thank you,’ Michelle shouted after him. Graham waved but didn’t look back.

‘Weirdo,’ Scott said.

‘That’s a bit harsh.’

‘Well, I mean… just look at him.’

‘What about him?’

‘Bloke his age, collecting trolleys for a living.’

‘Don’t be so hard on him, love. Looked to me like he’d got learning difficulties, something like that. Anyway, he’s working, and that’s got to be a good thing, hasn’t it? It’s more than either of us are doing at the moment.’

‘What’s that supposed to mean? We only just got here. Haven’t started looking for work yet.’

‘I know. I wasn’t suggesting anything, I was just saying it’s good to see people like him getting on so well, that’s all.’

‘Still a weirdo.’

Michelle sighed. ‘He might be thinking the same about you. Look at it from his point of view, Scott. The folks here all know each other and they all know this place. Right now we’re the strangers.’

The family’s improvised lunch was just about sufficient. They ate in the kitchen, all sitting around the rickety table they’d inherited from the house’s former owner. It started to feel reassuringly normal. ‘It’s like we’re on holiday,’ Phoebe said.

‘Except you’ve got school tomorrow,’ Scott reminded her.

‘And you’re supposed to enjoy holidays, remember?’ Tammy said.

Michelle shook her head. ‘Give it a rest, Tam.’

‘You know what I mean, though?’ Phoebe explained. ‘It’s like when you’re stopping in a caravan, and it’s home, but it’s not home? You get it, don’t you Mum? You’ve got all the same people around you and all the same stuff, but it’s not home. Feels like it by the end of the week, though.’

‘Remember when we went to the Isle of Wight?’ Scott said. ‘You two bottled it in the haunted house at that fair, remember?’

‘I was only ten,’ Phoebe protested. ‘It was scary.’

‘You should have seen your faces,’ he laughed, remembering the way they’d both coming running back out through the entrance, barging through the queue still trying to get in. ‘Priceless. You scared one woman half to death!’

‘You were just as bad,’ Tammy said. ‘You wouldn’t even go on the rollercoaster.’

‘I wasn’t feeling great. It was those chips. They didn’t agree with me.’

‘Yeah, right. I think you bottled it.’

‘We all ate the chips, Scott…’ Michelle said and he glared at her. The girls laughed and he had to admit defeat.

The conversation faltered. Michelle looked for a volunteer to help her wash up, but the girls were suddenly conveniently busy. They made their excuses and went up to their rooms, the idea of unpacking their belongings slightly preferable to dealing with dirty dishes. Only George remained, playing on the floor around Scott’s feet as Michelle cleared the table. ‘What did you say that for?’ he asked.

‘Say what?’

‘The thing about the chips.’

‘Oh that,’ she said, shoving a handful of wrappers and scraps into a black sack. ‘I was just messing about. I know you weren’t well that day.’

‘So why did you say it? Made me look stupid.’

‘Sorry, love. I didn’t mean anything by it.’

He got up quick, his sudden movement startling her momentarily. She was worried she’d offended him. He disappeared, only to return a few seconds later with paper, a pen, and his toolbox. He put the toolbox in the middle of the half-cleared table and took out a tape measure, then started studying the wall between the kitchen and the dining room, tapping it with his knuckles and peering into greasy nooks and crannies which looked like they hadn’t been cleaned out in years. Michelle worked around him.

‘It’s not going to be that big a job,’ he said.

‘What isn’t?’

‘Knocking this wall through. Remember what I was saying about opening the kitchen out into the dining room?’

‘I remember. Can we afford to do it?’

‘Afford to do what? It doesn’t cost anything to put a hole in a wall, Chelle.’

‘No, but it’ll cost to make it all good again.’

‘A bit of boarding up and plastering, a lick of paint, that’s all. I reckon I can have it done in a fortnight.’

‘Sounds good.’

‘Let me show you.’

‘Can I just get the washing up sorted?’

‘It’ll only take a second.’

‘Okay.’

She put down the plates and walked over to where he was standing. He started gesticulating like an excited kid, drawing imaginary lines on the wall. ‘I’ll take this much out, then you’ll have double the space in here. Be perfect, won’t it? I might put in another rad and shove a couple of extra sockets in here.’

‘We could do with more plugs.’

‘That’s what I thought. Not sure yet, though. I might just wait and get it done when I get the house re-wired.’

‘But like I said, can we afford it?’

‘Will you stop going on about money all the bloody time? Christ, you’re like a broken record.’

‘I’m just worried, that’s all.’

‘I already told you, the money we spend on the house is an investment. So it’ll probably cost a few grand to get these things done, but they’ll all add to the value of the house.’

‘I know that. We don’t have a lot to play with though, remember? There’s no rainy day fund anymore.’

‘Can’t you see what it’s going to be like? Try and visualise it, Chelle. Getting rid of this wall will really open up downstairs, make it feel more like a home. It’s too dark as it is, too many doors, not enough light.’

‘I know. I can see it. It’s just that—’

‘I tell you, it’s worth borrowing to get this done. We could take out a small mortgage on this place, release some of the equity.’

‘Who’s going to lend us money now, Scott? Come on…’

‘Stop being so bloody negative.’

‘I’m not. I’m all for being positive, love, but we also need to be realistic. If I wasn’t being positive I wouldn’t be here, would I?’

‘I’m going to cost it all up, see what it’ll take.’

‘You don’t listen to a word I say, do you?’

‘I do. Your problem is you don’t have any vision. Just try and picture it all done. It’ll be amazing. I’m going to start looking for work tomorrow and once we’re more established I’ll get myself set up again and start doing a few building jobs on the side.’

‘I thought you said you were done with running your own business?’

‘Did you not hear me? On the side. I’ll do stuff on the quiet. Cash in hand. This house will be beautiful.’

‘I don’t doubt you.’

‘So what’s the problem?’

She sighed and leant back against the table, choosing her words carefully. ‘If you started on the kitchen, how long do you think it would take?’

‘A couple of weeks if I’m working on it full-time. Might as well sort the wiring and the plumbing at the same time.’

‘But what if you’re working?’

‘Don’t know. A month or two, I guess. Evenings and weekends.’

‘And once you’ve started, the kitchen will be pretty much out of action?’

‘Not for the whole time. That’s going to be inevitable to an extent, though, isn’t it?’

‘So what do I do about cooking? I can’t cook in the middle of a building site.’

‘We’ll eat out.’

‘We tried that this morning.’

‘What the fuck’s wrong with you? I’m trying to get this family back on its feet, you’re just putting up obstacles.’

‘It’s just there’s a serious lack of McDonalds, Pizza Hut and Burger King around here. We’ll struggle without a fully functioning kitchen for a couple of days, never mind a couple of weeks or months, and I’m sorry if I sound like a broken record, but I’m really not sure we can afford to do all the stuff you’re talking about doing in one go. I think we need to take our time, plan things carefully, save up…’

‘And I think—’

Tammy burst into the room, mobile phone in hand, seething. ‘Shit.’

‘What’s your problem?’ Scott asked, annoyed he’d been interrupted.

‘This stupid bloody house, that’s my problem.’

She was gone again before either of them could react. Michelle followed her daughter from room to room. ‘Tam, slow down,’ she said, but Tammy was having none of it. She barged past her mother and went out the front door, slamming it behind her. Scott followed her out and chased her down the side of the house. She was coming back the other way now. He tried to stop her but she side-stepped him. ‘What the hell’s wrong with you?’

‘Can’t get a signal,’ she yelled, holding up her phone as if it was going to make a difference. She stared hopefully up at the small screen, willing the ‘Searching’ message to disappear, desperate to see some signal strength.

‘Have you tried upstairs?’

‘Of course I’ve tried upstairs. I’m not stupid. I’ve tried everywhere.’

‘Who the hell do you think you’re talking to?’ he shouted. She stormed off again, as much to put some distance between her and Scott than anything else.

‘Just leave her,’ Michelle said. She positioned herself between the two of them and put her hands on Scott’s chest. ‘Please, love. She’s only doing it because she knows she’ll get a reaction.’

‘Too right she’ll get a bloody reaction. I’m sick of the way she behaves. She’s not the only one who’s having to make adjustments, you know.’

‘I know… you’re right. But cut her some slack. Let her get used to the way things are now…’

‘I’m not putting up with it. We’ve had this crap non-stop since we sold the old house.’

‘Yes, and we probably will a while longer yet. She’s hurting.’

‘So am I.’

‘Yes, but you’re thirty-seven, she’s not quite seventeen. We just have to give her some space.’

‘She can have all the fucking space she wants around here. There’s nothing but space.’

‘Come on, love. Leave her to it. I’ll go and see to her, then I’ll come back and make us both a cup of tea. Okay?’

‘She needs to sort herself out. Bloody prima-donna.’

‘Let me talk to her, Scott. Please.’

Half a bar appeared, then a whole bar, then two. Tammy was well away from the house now, walking along the road into Thussock. She dialled out, desperate not to lose the precious signal strength. The call was answered quickly. ‘Dad? Dad, can you hear me?’

‘Tam? I was just thinking about you. How’re you doing? You settled in yet? What’s the house like?’

It all came flooding out. She couldn’t help it. ‘I can’t stand this bloody place, Dad. The house is vile and there’s nothing to do here, and all I want is to go home…’

‘Whoa, whoa… slow down. We talked about this. You knew it wasn’t going to be easy, but you need to be with your mom and your sister and George and—’

‘It’s not them though, is it? It’s him.’

‘Come on, Princess, we talked about this too. I know you don’t get on and I know he’s had his problems, but he’s trying. You just have to give it some time.’

‘Can’t I come and stay at yours?’

‘You know you can’t. I’m not around much at the moment, and I can’t leave you on your own. Anyway, listen, I was going to try and call you later. I’m in Switzerland for a few days in a couple of weeks. I thought I could arrange to fly back into Edinburgh instead of Heathrow, then I could come and spend a few days with you and Phoebe. I’ll have to check with your mum first, but I thought it could be good. You can show me the sights.’

‘There aren’t any.’

‘Well you’ve got about ten days to find some, okay?’

‘Ten days… I don’t think I’ll last ten more hours here.’

‘Of course you will.’

The phone crackled. She stopped walking. ‘Dad? Dad… you still there?’

An anxious pause, several seconds too long. ‘I’m still here.’

‘The signal’s rubbish up here. I don’t get it. We talked all the time when you were working in Kenya.’

‘And Nigeria last winter.’

‘It’s just this place.’

‘Hey, are you ready for school tomorrow?’

‘Suppose.’

‘You seen it yet?’

‘Saw it this morning.’

‘And?’

‘And what am I supposed to say? It’s a school. School’s school.’

‘Big day tomorrow, though. Hope it goes well.’

‘Just as long as it goes…’

‘Come on, Princess, cheer up. It’s not that bad.’

‘It is that bad. Honestly, Dad, you won’t believe this place when you see it. It’s a dump, and the people are all retards and chavs.’

‘They can’t all be retards and chavs, I don’t believe that.’

‘Like I said, wait ’til you come here.’

‘I’ll look forward to it. I’ll try and give your mum a call later, sort things out. But Tam, just try and be positive, okay. I know it’s hard, but—’

‘You don’t understand.’

‘I can’t hear you… you’re breaking up. Tam…? Tammy?’ She could still hear his voice, but he couldn’t hear her. Then he disappeared altogether. Three bleeps of disconnection sliced through the silence, emphasising the separation. She just stared at the phone thinking it worked in Kenya and Nigeria… why not in fucking Thussock? It made it feel as if her dad was further away than ever, almost like he was on another planet.

She’d walked as far as the wooden bus shelter. She sat down on the uncomfortable bench inside.

‘No buses for another twelve hours or so, love,’ Michelle said, startling her. She’d followed her from the house. She gestured for her daughter to shuffle up and sat down. ‘Get to talk to your dad?’

‘A bit. Signal went.’

‘He okay?’

‘Fine.’

‘Do you want to talk?’

‘No, I want to go home.’

‘We are home.’

‘You know what I mean.’

Michelle swung her feet under the seat, the tips of her toes scuffing the gravel. It was impossibly quiet. From here the side of the shelter obscured the house belonging to the twins they’d seen earlier, and the curve of the road had hidden their own place. She realised that apart from the shelter and the road, she couldn’t see anything else man-made. The isolation was useful. She could talk freely here. ‘It’s all a bit shitty, isn’t it?’

‘You can say that again.’

‘I’m sorry.’

‘Why are you apologising, Mum? It’s not your fault.’

‘I feel responsible. I helped make the decisions.’

‘No you didn’t. This was all down to Scott, it always is. Stop making excuses for him.’

‘I’m not. Look, Tam, I know it’s hard. I think it’s probably harder on you and Phoebe than the rest of us.’

‘You reckon? I don’t. I think you’ve got it toughest.’

‘Me? How?’

‘Phoebe and me still have a way out. I know Dad’s not around much at the moment, but he keeps saying he’s going to jack his job in so we’ll be able to spend more time at his, and there’s uni and we’ll get our own places eventually. But this is it for you, Mom. You’re stuck with Scott.’

‘Come on, that’s not fair. Don’t say that.’

‘I just wish you’d never married him. Things were fine before he came along and you and Dad split up.’

‘The two things weren’t connected, Tam, and you know it. Your dad and I just grew apart. It happens. We still get on, though, and that’s just about the best we could have hoped for in the circumstances.’

‘Spare me, Mum, I’m not a kid anymore. I’ve heard this a hundred times and I get it – you fell out of love and now you’re just friends. I don’t have an issue with any of that. It’s Scott I have a problem with. He treats you like shit.’

‘That’s not true. He’s been under a huge amount of pressure since—’

‘It is true.’

‘For all his faults though, Tam, I love him. He infuriates me and he does some bloody stupid things at times, but I love him. Besides, we’ve got George. You think the world of your little brother.’

‘I do, and none of this is his fault. When he was born Phoebe and I used to think having him would make everything okay and bring us closer together, make us feel like a real family.’

‘We are a real family.’

‘Hardly.’

‘Come on…’

‘Anyway, I’ve realised I got it wrong. Having George didn’t bring us all together, it just stopped you and Scott from falling apart.’

‘That’s rubbish.’

‘It’s not.’

There was no talking to Tammy when she was in this kind of mood. Michelle just put her arm around her shoulder and pulled her closer. She didn’t know what to say for the best and so said nothing. There were no right answers, no easy solutions. Christ, with Tammy pulling her one way and Scott the other, it was a wonder she hadn’t been torn down the middle.

After a few seconds, Michelle stood up. She reached out her hand and pulled Tammy out of the shelter. The twins were working in their garden across the road. They’d changed now, both of them wearing matching baggy jeans and complementary T-shirts. ‘You were right earlier,’ Michelle said, watching them. ‘They are a bit weird.’

Tammy laughed and wiped her eyes. ‘I don’t get how they’re happy wanting to look the same? If I had an identical twin I’d want us both to look completely different.’

‘Jeez, two of you… imagine that. I struggle enough with just the one.’

‘Shut up!’ Tammy said, leaning against her mum.

Michelle was about to speak when a car shot past them. The driver braked hard, then put the car in reverse and came skidding back towards them. He wound down his window. ‘Youse two ladies all right here?’

Michelle and Tammy looked at each other, both struggling with the accent. Michelle subtly positioned herself in front of her daughter. She didn’t like the look of the man in the car. Unshaven, with a horrible, wiry ponytail and wearing a grubby denim jacket and faded football shirt, he looked like he’d been wearing the same clothes since the mid-eighties. His car, a battered old Ford-something-or-other, might have been impressive twenty-odd years ago, but it definitely wasn’t now. The paintwork was patchwork, and the knackered exhaust made it sound more like a tractor than a car. The bodywork was spattered with mud, like it had recently been taken off-road. Inside was no better. The floor and dash were covered in all kinds of crap, the back seat full of DVDs and drinks cans, and the rear windscreen was more stickers than glass.

‘We’re fine, thanks very much,’ Michelle replied. He kept trying to look around her. She couldn’t tell if he was trying to eye her up or Tammy. Probably both, she thought.

‘You lost?’

‘We’re not lost.’

‘You new?’

‘Just moved in down the road,’ she said, inadvertently giving him more information than she’d intended.

‘The grey house?’

‘Uh huh,’ she replied, not about to risk saying anything else, feeling increasingly uncomfortable. The way he looked at her… the way he kept licking his lips with his snake-like tongue…

‘You know there’s no buses Sunday afternoons?’

‘We noticed.’

‘You could walk back from here. S’not far.’

‘We know, that’s how we got here,’ Michelle said, trying not to laugh. ‘We were just getting a little air. Getting to know the area.’

‘I’ll give you a lift. Plenty of room,’ he said and he leant across and opened the passenger door. The worn velour seat would have looked just as uninviting had she known him. Now she was really starting to feel uncomfortable.

‘No, thank you,’ she said firmly. ‘Honestly, we’re fine.’

‘Ah, go on. I’ve always plenty of space for two lovely ladies. You’re not out my way. Last chance…?’

‘We’re okay, thanks,’ Michelle told him.

The man in the car nodded, pulled the door shut again, then put his foot down and disappeared in a cloud of gravel and dust. She might have been impressed, she thought, had she been Tammy’s age and it had still been nineteen eighty-nine.