CHAPTER 14 Beast was born

By dusk, I made it back to my freebie house, stripped off jewelry and sweaty, dusty clothes, and took four steaks and the necklace of panther claws into the yard. Though it was only marginally night, I shifted.

Hungry. Ate dead cow. Stretched. High on sun-warmed stone, plopped on side, face on rock, whiskers tickling. Purring, as sunset painted sky many purples. Rain sprinkled on warm stone, damping pelt. Scents strong in shower. Mold, river, fish, cow blood, dogs, cats. Prey.

Mouse came out to play, leaving tracks in mud. I softened breath. Watched it dart among stones. Eyes slit, lazy, content. Had eaten or would play with mouse. But hunting soon. Foolish to waste strength on mouse. No matter how fun.

Full dark fell. Rain was constant and sluggish. A distant bell tolled. Time passed. Stirred, stretched again, pulling joints, muscles, shaking off rain. Studied garden. Prowled it. Marked it. My den. Leaped to wall, slipped into shadow. Padded along alleys and side streets, full of smells. Jumped over tall gates keeping humans out, pets in. Kept to shadows, following her scent back. Food/alcohol/mating place open. Club. Different music makers filled night with sound. Crowd smaller. Humans smelled lonely again.

Slow, steady rain returned, keeping humans indoors. Prowled walls of building, finding dark place on side street. Cars parked. Sniffed out big one, owned by vamp. Leo.

She commanded me, Hunt. Now. Huffed but rounded building at swift trot. When street empty, crept near front door. Made self small in shadow, tail tight, feet together, close. Pulled in scents, mouth open, lips pulled back. Found Anna’s and Rick’s trail, covered by many others, washed by rain. But I am good hunter. Could tell they had left within short time of each other, taking same route. Rick’s trail overlay Anna’s. Perused her. Prey. Followed down Royal Street, away from club. Trail scents overlapping. Rick stalking Anna. Hunched low, creeping, keeping to shadows. Cars passed, moving slow. Hid from each. Following. Hunting.

Found their scent hanging on air. Mixed with smell of sex, sweat, chocolate, wine. Above. On ledge. A private balcony with an open door—her thoughts. A hotel, an expensive one. Room beside theirs contained only faint people scents. Empty. Dark. Doors closed.

Single leap over balcony railing, tail spinning for balance. Table, two chairs took up floor. Dropped between them, bumping table. Pot rattled, rolled for edge. Rose fast. Caught in front paws, held still. Released pot, which settled. Crouching in dark, I/we listened.

“You have to go soon?” Rick asked, his voice lazy.

“Why? You miss me already?”

“Always.” Lies in tone of words. Human lips made smacking sounds. Kissing.

Silly thing, kissing. Licking better. But the sound made Jane sad. Angry. I hacked softly. Take him. Hunt him. She fell silent.

Bed creaked. Scents of sex spilled into night: sweat, semen, hot breath, scent of flowers. Chemicals of Anna-human perfume, stink of detergent, fabric softeners. Also, faint, was part of mad one’s scent and blood. Anna-human had been blood meal to it recently, after it fed enough to hide rot scent from human nose. Though Anna-human water-washed, I still smelled it, hidden under chemicals.

Ahhh, Jane thought, excited. It only smells of decay when it’s hungry. That’s one reason the scent signature is so complex. Why didn’t I figure that out?

Jane not Beast. Not good hunter. I made quiet sound—sheeeeghhh—inhaling, pulling air over tongue, over scent sacs in roof of mouth. Anna-woman not fertile. Yet mated. Confusing humans. Strange. Scent of mad one was also strange. Had new, different parts. Still mad one but not. Confusing as humans mating out of season. Sound and smell of sex ended.

She thought, Soooo. It eats flesh to hide whatever is happening to it that makes it stink like rot? But why is it rotting? You said it was sick. . . .

“I still don’t understand why you want to talk to him,” Anna-human said.

“Business, baby. A deal big enough to take you away from him.” Smell of lies on words. “You heard what my friends said today. We need to know about those land purchases.”

She sighed, pouting. “I’ll try to get you in to see him.”

Another lie. More kissing sounds. Stinks on wind. Sex without mating is always lies. Humans cannot smell lies. Sad.

“I’d better go. It’s a long drive into the country,” she said. “Unless you have energy for . . .” More kissing. Low laughter. Smell of sex rising.

Deep within, Jane went silent. Retreating. Beast thought of mouse in garden. Should have stayed. Played with it. Small snack, fresh and frightened. Better than this.

Low moaning, laughter, whispers on air.

She was angry. I growled, soft. I/we should hunt, kill man. Kill mate who was not. Some, in past, crossed into my territory, giving signal to mate. Appearing again, again, yet only teasing. Memory of claws raking rump of one. Blood welling in hide as he flipped. Dashed from my hunting land. I huffed in remembered satisfaction. She smiled, amused, less sad.

Mating took long. Far longer than any beast’s. When it was over, Anna-human left bed. Showered off scent. Rick didn’t shower. Carried her scent on him. They left room. I listened, tracking them as they moved through hotel. A car pulled away from parking garage, her scent on it. Rick walked on street, passing beneath. Gone. I leaped to walkway below balcony. Followed, Jane’s interest rising. He walked two blocks, turned down side street.

His bike rested in small lot. I crouched tight beside wall and small porch, watching, listening. Rick stood, half in shadow, half in light from tall pole. He held out piece of paper. Sleepy human hidden in dark reached out. Took it. Money. “Thanks, man,” Rick said.

“Anytime, Ricky-bo. You get lucky?” Sex in question, leering. Hidden human stood, a lighter shadow on night.

“Don’t I always?” Pride and amusement in question.

“Details, man. I want details.”

“Not this time, Paco.” Rick grinned, his teeth white. “Maybe next time.”

“Come on, man. At least tell me if it was that high yaller gal. You say she put you down like a fighter pro. I didn’t figure you’d get lucky with her anytime soon.”

“Not her.” Man-grin in tone. “But I’m working it. Part of the game, my man. Part of the chase. But the girl’s not high yellow. She’s Cherokee, I think.”

“Yeah? I hear them Injun gals is hot after it.”

“We’ll see.”

Curled my lips, showing teeth. Jane not part of game.

Rick bumped fists with Paco, dropped helmet over head, and straddled bike. Started it with turn of key. Over growl of machine, he said, “Later, my man.” Wheeled bike around, over uneven pavement into street. Bike’s roar grew louder. Turned north. Hunter instinct gave destination. He headed toward her house. Her den. Go home! she commanded. Fast!

I leaped, whirled in midair. Threw self backward, into run. Raced through shadows and light. Streets empty. Dawn was close. I took unknown paths, following air currents moving through Quarter. Heart raced. Breath hot. Body hot.

Big cats are fast. But in summer, only for short time. Better chases in winter, breath billowing, ice on whiskers. Here is always summer. Water splashed from puddles, rank with gasoline and urine. Tongue lolled, breath hard and hoarse, wet sounding.

Smells flew by like wind: humans, dogs, cats, an opossum heavy with young. Food, spices, peppers, rotting garbage, stink from storm drains—warm, wet, full of dead things. Wanted to explore. Slink into dark. She refused. Heat built up inside. Breath like fire.

Near Katie’s I sprinted. Bike puttered slowly closer. Slower as he entered my/our territory. Too close. Whipped down narrow passage. Leaped. Landed atop brick wall, running on narrow ledge, like limb but flat. Birds squawked, fluttered, panicked in night. Bike died.

Not dead. She had explained. Not dead. But not alive. Stopped.

Dropped over wall. Landed on big rock. Breath heaving. Hot. Too hot. Too hot. Rick rang bell. Knocked, sound loud through empty house. Must shift. Must shift. Now. Rick at gate. Opened lock. Light in his hand. Where did he get the key? Her worry.

My territory. Mine. Pulled back lips to show killing teeth. Saw again paw swatting teasing male, drawing blood. Chasing teasing male from my den. Mine. Wanted to attack, but she held back. No. Wait. Watch. Panting, I dropped into shadow between rock and wall, curled tight, trying to stifle hot breath. Need water. Much water. Fountain tinkled softly. Teasing with need. As male cat had teased. Hated teasing.

Light played over garden, back, forth, up, down. Boots crunched earth. He moved broken pot, spilling earth, soft sounds of pot, of soil sliding out like insides of dead meal. He paused. Squatted down. I raised head to see; nose and ears not enough.

He was bent over, leg-sitting, torso high. Shining beam of light over place where I ate. Rain washed blood away? Should have . . . He touched ground. Put fingers in light. Watery blood on them. She tensed, watching. Rick wiped hand on dirt, stood, looking at garden. I dropped low. Light and footsteps moved away. He left, locking gate after.

Raced to fountain and drank, drank, drank. Found her form in memory and shifted.

Heat steamed off my naked body in the warm, wet night air. The muscles in my thighs and calves cramped where I crouched on the boulder. Sweat broke out on me in huge puddles, pooling, rivulets running down my spine and between my breasts. Through my hair, tangling the strands. Nausea and hunger warred in my belly, cramping there as well.

A pain gripped my middle and I retched. Startled, I threw up the heated water I had just drank. That had never happened before. I was too hot. I had seldom run for so long in Beast’s form, and I was having trouble throwing off the heat. I could trot or walk for long distances, but a dead run was for the final killing sprint, when claws and teeth locked down on the hindquarters and leg tendons of escaping big prey, prey marked from a botched ambush, when dropping down from a high limb or ledge went wrong. Sprinting was for killing. Not for running city streets.

I forced myself to stand, pulled the travel pack from around my neck; it had slid during the run, choking. Unsteady, sweat slick on my skin, I made my way to the house and inside. Instantly I smelled another intruder, gone now; his scent hanging on the air was several hours old. Bruiser had paid me a visit. Dang, I was getting popular. I stumbled to the shower, tossed the now dry clothes outside the shower door and turned on the cold water, or as cold as water ever got in this heated swamp of a place. I stood under the spray, letting it wash away the stink of sweat and the gasoline I had splashed through, draining away the sick feeling. It took a long time. Longer than I expected. The shower pounded down and I drank the spray to rehydrate. Rubbed my cramping calves, one foot at a time on the corner seat. I shuddered with reaction.

No wonder the big cats native to this region were so much smaller than their Appalachian cousins had been. Heat dissipation was hard with a larger body mass. When I was finally cool, I dried off and walked to the kitchen where I ate two Snickers while cooking a big, eight-cup pot of oatmeal. I ate every bite standing up at the stove, naked and trembling and shoveling it in.

I shouldn’t have forced Beast, not made her run so long and hard. But then I’d have missed seeing the Joe search my garden. I had to find out who had given him a gate key. And take it from him. And teach him a lesson about invading my home.

My territory, Beast rumbled angrily. My den.

“Yeah. I agree totally,” I said between bites. “My territory.” No matter how temporary.

When hunger was sated enough for me to think, I twisted my hair out of the way, into a knot and long, wet ponytail, and walked through the house, scenting. Bruiser had entered from the side porch. Another interloper to deal with. Just how many keys to my freebie house and garden were there? Had Katie given them out like candy?

Bruiser had made his way through the house slowly, pausing at each of the places where I had discovered cameras. I knelt and sniffed at each; he hadn’t touched anything. Even in human form I was pretty sure his scent wasn’t on the wires or the cables. He just paused in each spot, as if studying the destruction. In the bath, he had touched the clothes hanging in the shower, still damp at the time, his scent on them stronger, as if he had inspected them for bloodstains.

His MO changed in my bedroom. He stayed by each camera longer, maybe looking around, studying, taking it in. His scent was on the handles. He had opened each drawer, looked in the closet. Touched my clothes, squeezing pockets and hems with a thoroughness that wasn’t carnal—it was a professional search. I got a chair and checked the box on the top shelf. I placed a finger on it, feeling the faint buzzing that indicated the obfuscation spell was still activated. He hadn’t touched it. But I couldn’t say the same thing about my weapons. They had been handled.

I carried the Benelli M4 Super 90 shotgun to the bed and checked it for tampering. This model M4 had been designated by the military as a Joint Service Combat Shotgun. Its steel components had a matte black, phosphated, corrosion-resistant finish; the aluminum parts were matte and hard anodized; the finish reduced the weapon’s visibility during night operations. The shotgun is considered by many experts to be nearly idiotproof. It requires little or no maintenance, operates in all climates and weather conditions, can be dumped in a lake or pond and left there for a long time and not corrode. It can fire twenty-five thousand rounds of standard ammunition without needing to have any major parts replaced. I had studied long and hard before investing in the weapon.

The Benelli, a smoothbore, magazine-fed, semiauto shotgun, is designed around the autoregulating gas-operated—ARGO—firing system, with dual gas cylinders, gas pistons, and action rods for increased reliability. Locking the barrel is achieved by a rotating bolt with two lugs. It can fire 2.75- and 3-inch shells of differing power levels without any operator adjustments and in any combination, and can be adjusted or fieldstripped without tools. It’s perfect for close-in fighting in low-light operations. It’s a totally cool weapon. Mostly, though, I just liked the fact that it was idiotproof.

The weapon was loaded for vamp with hand-packed silver-fléchette rounds made by a pal in the mountains. Fléchettes were like tiny knives, which, when fired, spread out in a widening, circular pattern, entering the target with lacerating, deadly force. The fact that each fléchette was composed of sterling silver decreased their penetrating power but made them poisonous to vamps, even without a direct hit.There was no way a vamp could cut all of them out of his body before he bled out or the silver spread through his system. I opened the cock, inspected each round with eye and nose. Bruiser hadn’t messed with the weapon except to see what I carried.

Other than camera hunting, I hadn’t been to the second story. Still naked, I followed Bruiser up there, from room to room, all four of the antique-decorated bedrooms, closets, and both baths. He was faster here. A lot faster, as if he knew I was seldom upstairs. Which was a little odd. He might guess I stayed downstairs, but how could he know?

Back downstairs, he spent a lot of time in the kitchen, especially looking in the refrigerator. Most of the original beef was gone, leaving only a few good quality sirloin steaks.

It took me some time to work through the emotional pheromones in the traces he left, but I finally settled on two. Disgust and curiosity were in his scent in equal parts. Now, why did the henchman of the head of the vamp council need to know about disabled cameras in my house? And look in my closet and drawers? My refrigerator? Had Leo sent him? If so, why?

The memory of the cave dream returned, bright and shocking in its intensity. For a moment, I was in the cave, breathing herbed smoke, shadow figures dancing on the walls. I jerked back to the now, putting out a hand for balance.

Exhausted, feeling violated at the intrusion into my home and garden, I walked from door to door, checking the locks—what little good that would do me with all the keys floating around. After that, with dawn graying the sky, I crawled into bed and was asleep instantly.

The dream came at me, slow, predatory. Slipped up, padding close, a vision of a pregnant moon, big, round, full of light, glistening on snow, reflecting back from icicles hanging from tree limbs. Stars in the sky were cold, less bright than on sickle moon nights. I was cat, but not Beast. Was myself but not quite, in the odd way of dreams. I scented the darkness, whiskers trembling, smelling the forest, alive beneath the snow but heavy with winter’s long slumber.

I sat, unmoving, short, stubby tail tucked close, staring over a pristine expanse of meadow left by white man’s fire. Pangs tore at me, hunger gripping my belly. I had hunted, had caught a rabbit days ago. Now I waited, watching for movement on snow. I had to eat or I would die.

The wind changed, lifting my fur. The frozen scent of meat came on the air. Blood. A kill, not mine, lay beneath snow. Close. Hunger clawed at my belly. I stood, opened my mouth, and pulled in scents as Edoda had taught me. Big-Cat scent was merged with the blood scent. Fear cut into hunger, fear of Big Cat. Panther. Tlvdatsi. Hope shot through me. Tlvdatsi. Edoda. I huffed hard. No. Edoda is dead. His blood scent was a cruel memory.

Grief brought the awareness that I was dreaming. An awareness that pushed me up and out of the dream, making me an observer. This is new, I thought. Not a dream. A memory. Excitement built along my nerves. In the dream/ memory, I sniffed deeply; flehmen behavior, another part of me thought, sleepily. Jacobsen’s organ, necessary for all creatures who use olfactory and pheromonal communication methods.

This was a different cat scent, dangerous to bobcat—to we sa. To me. But the Big Cat was gone. It had hidden its kill. I crept across the snow, pausing often to crouch and to listen. To scent the wind. Gone. Big Cat had abandoned its prey.

The scent of blood grew, frozen beneath the snow. Hunger clawed at me as if alive, demanding, eat, eat, eat. The kill was shoved beneath the lip of a white and yellow rock, quartz white as snow, veined with the white man’s gold. The blood scent reached up through the snow. I unsheathed my claws and batted snow away, moon-touched fluffs flying in the dark night.

A frozen deer carcass was revealed and I tore into it with claws and sharp teeth. Eating, desperate. Blood melting and smearing across my cold fur and paws and jaws. Hunger stopped tearing into me, satisfied. And still I ate. Gorging.

Weight slammed me into carcass. Claws tore into my shoulders. Big Cat. I tried to run. My pelt ripped in her claws. The smell of my blood was hot in the night. Tlvdatsi screamed. Pawed me over, exposing my belly. I raised my paws, claws extended, ripping into her face. The scent of cubs, born out of season, was strong on her. Her blood fell onto me. Her fangs tore into my belly. Ripping. My claws slashed deep into her. Our blood mingled, running together. The snake buried in the blood of tlvdatsi opened to me. Pain tore into my heart. My breath stopped. I am dying.

I sank into the snake of the tlvdatsi. Deep. Deep. I saw where we were similar. And different. I couldn’t be Big Cat. I was too small. Darkness pushed inside me. Dying. One last clench of claw. Hopeless. Frantic.

I shivered into the snake. And stole the body of tlvdatsi. Not just the snake under her skin, to share her form. I took her. Stealing her body. Stealing her soul.

Light and cold and blood exploded through me. Tlvdatsi screamed in rage. Fighting me. Inside with me. Nononononononononono.

I took tlvdatsi. Made her mine. I shoved my memory into her skin. With her.

I/we rolled across snow. Heaving breaths. The world shifted, shuddered, quaked. I fought her for control. And I/we rose up, hunger demanding. I/we ate from her kill. My kill. Tlvdatsi screamed and raged. Eat, eat. Belly aching with need. Then, Kits. Kits. Kits.

I stopped eating when I was full. Satisfied. And big. The Beast was crouched inside tlvdatsi with me. Watching. Kits, she demanded. Showed me the path, back to her/our den. Scents, landmarks, places marked to make it ours/hers, hers/ours. Followed near the trail, in the spoor of a wolf, hiding my tracks with his. Would have to kill the wolf soon. Danger to kits.

Kits made hunger cries, chirping whistles. Squealed low-pitched. I/we followed my beast scent to den, low cave in rock, opening wide enough to crawl through, into the dark of earth, into cave. Leaves had blown in. Good den. I/we touched, licked, smelled cubs. Very young. Breath full of milk, open mouths in dark. I/we settled with them, grooming paws. Cubs pulled at us, milk teeth uncomfortable yet soothing as they nursed. Language and history and memory fell away. Buried. Beast was born.

I woke with a shudder. I was drenched in sweat, my heart an uneven trip-hammer. “Crap. What was that?” But I knew. I knew. It was a memory of my own past. It was the memory of how Beast and I ended up inside me together. I had stolen her body. And ended up with her soul, inside, with me.

Deep within, I heard Beast’s panting breaths. I tasted her anger, old and worn like a bone with nothing left inside or out, no marrow, no substance except memory.

“Dear God,” I whispered. “What did I do?”

Neither God nor Beast answered me.

This was outside the life of a skinwalker. I knew that without knowing how I knew. I had done foulest evil. I had stolen the body of a living creature. Beast had called me liver-eater.

I rose from the tangled damp sheets and stripped the bed, made it up with fresh sheets, tossing the damp ones into the corner. Stinking with flop sweat, I took a shower, standing a long time under the water as if it could really clean me. Exhausted, I climbed back in bed and pulled the sheets and coverlet over me.

Black magic. I had done black magic.

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