IN THE END, LILY DIDN’T CALL the taxi; I did. Danny said he could be there in fifteen minutes, and that was good enough, because it also gave me time to call Shadowed Hills and leave a terse, angry messageto with the Hob who answered the phone. “Tell Sylvester I’m going Home,” I said. “I’ll try not to die before I get there.”
“Wait for him,” Lily said, watching me drop the phone back into its cradle. “You don’t have to do this alone.”
“Time’s too short, and the stakes are too high.” If Devin was willing to kill me to get his hands on the hope chest, how long would it be before he started trying to find its hiding place? How long before there were assassins in the bushes at Shadowed Hills, hired killers watching the Court of Cats for targets? “This ends now.”
“Yes,” she said, anxiously. “It very well may.”
I paused. “Can you send a messenger to Tybalt?” She nodded. “Tell him it was Devin; tell him he knows why, if he thinks about it. And tell him I’m sorry I got him involved in this.”
“Toby . . .”
“Just tell him.” I kissed her forehead and left the Tea Gardens as quickly as I could, heading for the parking lot where Danny would be meeting me.
I didn’t look back.
Danny picked up pretty quickly on my desire to make the drive in silence. Maybe it was the fact that I cried the whole way. The street in front of Home was deserted when we pulled up; he took the money Lily had given me for cab fare, looking at me with worry in his eyes. “You gonna be okay in there? You need some muscle?”
I patted his elbow. “I’ll be fine, Danny.”
“You sure?”
“I’m sure.”
“All right. You need me, you call.” Then he was gone, tires squealing as he blazed off down the street. I watched until I was sure that he was gone before pulling the gun out of my pocket and turning to walk up to the door.
It was time to go Home.
Home’s door was often closed but never locked; all you had to do to get inside is want to be there. Kids were posted in the front room twenty-four hours a day, making sure trouble didn’t start unless they started it. But when I turned the doorknob, nothing happened. The door was locked against me. Devin knew I was coming.
“This is October Daye!” I shouted, pounding my hand against the door. “Let me in!”
Footsteps, and the sound of locks being undone. The door opened, revealing a drawn-looking Manuel with gauze taped above one eye, not quite concealing the swelling. I caught my breath, letting it out in a slow hiss as Dare peeked around him, frighteningly pale, bruises standing out in sharp relief on her cheek and neck. Manuel saw the gun, and his eyes widened.
“What are you doing here?” I asked, voice pitched low. “I told Luna to have you wait.”
“Devin called us,” Manuel said. “We always come when he calls.” Dare was shaking her head in small, sharp motions, making go away gestures with her hands. Devin was angry that I’d left them at Shadowed Hills and gone on without them. Knowing what I knew now, he was angry they hadn’t been able to keep watching me for him.
Dare wanted me out of harm’s way, but that wasn’t an option. Not with the taste of roses lingering in my mouth. “If you go now, I’ll come for you when this is done,” I said, still quietly.
Manuel looked at me solemnly, opening the door wider in invitation. Dare whimpered and he shushed her, not looking away from my face. They were staying. This was their Home, whether they wanted it or not, and they were staying until the end.
I stepped into the room, scanning for potential trouble. I didn’t see any; we were alone. From where I stood, the building didn’t hold anyone but two green-eyed kids, a cursed changeling, and a killer. The room was smaller without its smattering of teenagers, and the scars on the walls seemed older. For the first time, it looked like what it really was: a flophouse with a fancy name, where kids who didn’t know any better let themselves be abused by someone who should have known better.
Crossing the room, I smashed the glass over the call button for Devin’s office with the butt of my gun. Shards flew in all directions, and Dare gasped, eyes wide with a mixture of awe and terror. When did I become the hero? When did she start looking at me like that?
“What are you doing?” she asked.
“I’m finishing things,” I said, trying to project a calm I didn’t feel. Silently I told myself we’d get out of there alive; I was going to live up to the unspoken expectations in her eyes. It was the only promise I could make. “It’s about to get messy. I’d go now, if I were you.” I knew they wouldn’t go—I wouldn’t have, when I belonged there—but I had to give them the chance.
“He’ll kill you if you don’t leave now,” Manuel said.
“Since he’s planning to kill me anyway, I don’t see where that changes things.” I hit the button, ignoring the broken glass. It was too late for a little more blood to make a difference. “I know you’re there, Devin. It’s time for you to be out here.” Stepping back, I waited.
I didn’t have to wait long. Devin’s voice crackled over the intercom, saying “Toby? What’s going on? Where did you go?” There was fear there. Not much, but if I’d needed any further confirmation, that would have been enough to give it to me.
I pushed the button down again. “I know, Devin.”
“You know what?”
“I know everything. I know who you hired, and when, and how.” I was extemporizing wildly, but he had no way of knowing that. “I know about the men you sent to kill me. I know you seduced me because you thought it might get you what you wanted. I know my shoulder will never be the same and I may never sleep again and you’d better get your ass out here right now.” The last words were practically a hiss, my fury boiling over. He betrayed Evening, and he betrayed me. There was no way I was forgiving that.
The intercom was silent. I turned to point the gun in my hand toward the door to the back hall. After several endless minutes it swung open and Devin stepped out, holding up empty hands in surrender.
“It didn’t have to be like this, Toby,” he said, voice weary in defeat. The brightness of his eyes had faded, turning slate gray, like a storm had come to his private sky. It had to happen eventually; October always brings rain, even in California.
“You killed her.”
“You have no proof of that.”
I kept the gun aimed squarely at his chest. “Pretty sure the Queen wouldn’t see things that way.”
“Pretty sure you’re not planning to take me to her Court to find out.” He shook his head. “I never wanted to lie to you, October. Why wouldn’t you just . . . let it go? We could have been happy. Finally happy. I really do love you. I always have.”
“Why, Devin? Root and branch, why did you do this?”
“Because I’m going to live forever.” There was a challenge in his eyes. “Maybe you’re willing to settle for changeling time, but I’m not. The purebloods could give us all immortality, but they refuse, because we’re ‘not good enough.’ If they won’t give me what’s mine, I’ll take it. That’s all I’ve been doing. Taking what belongs to me.”
“That’s sick.”
“That’s the way the world works. What, are you happy that you’re going to die? Do you enjoy waking up every morning and realizing your body got a little bit closer to breaking in the night? Because I don’t. We could have lived forever, together, if you’d just let it go.”
“You had Evening killed because you wanted to be immortal?”
“No,” he said. A small knot of pain let go in my shoulders, only to snarl tighter than ever before when he continued, “that’s why I killed her myself.”
That was the one thing I hadn’t allowed myself to consider: that he could have held the knife. “You bastard,” I whispered.
“I paid three Redcaps to hold her down while I slit her throat. She screamed, Toby. You should have heard her. It was like music . . . but it was too late. The key was gone, and it wasn’t over yet. Everything after that could have been avoided if she’d just listened to me.”
“Devin . . .”
“You always had so many illusions—sort of funny for someone as inept with them as you are. I tried so hard to beat them out of you.” His smile was proprietary. “I could’ve managed it if you’d given me a few more years. You could be standing beside me now, on the right side. You could understand.”
“I don’t want to understand,” I said. “You make me sick.”
“Human morality, October. Get over it. It’s not going to get you very far.” He stepped toward me, stopping when I raised the gun. “She’s still dead. No matter what you do, she stays dead. Can you really stand to lose us both?”
“I can’t stand not to.” Questions were whirled through my head faster than I could ask them. How did he edit Evening’s blood memory? That’s supposed to be impossible, but he did it. How many more assassins were there? The ones in Goldengreen—I had to assume they were real, but I’d never seen them.
And in the end, it didn’t matter. Those were the questions I could answer later; what mattered now was ending this, here, tonight, before any other innocents got hurt.
Devin’s tone changed, becoming wheedling. “I never wanted you involved,Toby. I didn’t think she’d call you—I really didn’t. If you’d just stopped when I asked . . .”
“You’d have killed me anyway, eventually.” I stepped forward, eyes narrowed. “I haven’t belonged to you in a long time, and honor doesn’t protect me anymore. I’m not stupid, Devin. You know better.”
“You won’t shoot me,” he said, and smiled. “You can’t.”
“I can’t?”
“No. You still love me. You’re still too human. You can’t kill someone you love.” He sounded completely sure of himself. “I know you. You can’t fool me.”
“No, Devin, you know a girl who didn’t know enough to get away from you.” My hands were shaking, aim wavering as my focus slipped. Anger makes everything personal. As if this wasn’t already personal enough. “Love you? Love you? You killed Evening, and you killed Ross, and you tried to kill me. You put your kids in harm’s way, and now you have the . . . the audacity to say that I love you? Oberon’s blood, Devin, will you just grow up already?”
“Yes. You love me.” He lowered his hands. “You always have, and you always will, no matter what I do to you. All changelings are crazy, Toby. You know that. Your madness is your loyalty.”
“Screw you,” I said, and steadied my aim.
I shouldn’t have waited so long. Dare shouted, “Manny, no!” and I whirled, letting Devin out of my sight. That wasn’t my first mistake; it stood a good chance of being my last.
Manuel—sweet, innocent Manuel—was holding a revolver, feet braced at shoulder width, the barrel of the gun aimed at my chest. He was trembling. I froze. I was willing to bet that he’d never shot anyone, that he didn’t want to shoot me, but I wasn’t going to test it. Smart people don’t gamble with guns.
“He said . . . he said we wouldn’t have to . . . hurt you . . . if you’d just stop getting in the way. You could come back here. You could be family like you used to. But you wouldn’t listen!” Manny was almost crying, face slick with sweat. “Put down the gun, Ms. Daye.”
“Manny?”
“Just put it down.”
“I thought Evening was your friend, Manny. What are you—”
He gestured violently with the gun, looking upset enough that I didn’t trust him not to fire without meaning to. “She didn’t listen! You won’t listen! You want to stay alive around here, when the boss talks, you listen!”
I knelt, careful to move slowly as I placed my gun on the floor. “Where’d you get the gun, Manny?” I asked, not rising. “Did Devin give it to you? He did, didn’t he?”
“Be quiet, Toby,” Devin said. His voice was flat. Maeve’s bones, had I really let him touch me? Had I really touched him? What kind of a fool was I? “Manuel, shoot her. Don’t kill her, just hurt her. The leg, I think.”
Manny was crying now, and his hands were clutching the gun so tightly that his knuckles had gone white. I cleared my throat, pulling his attention back to my face. “Do the bullets burn, Manny?” I asked, in as conversational a tone as I could manage. “Do they make your skin crawl? That’s iron, Manny. He wants you to shoot me with iron bullets.”
“Manuel, shoot her now.”
I stood carefully, holding my hands up at shoulder level. “Can you do it? Can you torture me with iron, for him?”
“Manuel, are you listening to me?” Devin snapped. “Don’t make me take that gun away from you.”
“He won’t do it himself.” I kept my hands raised. “Don’t you wonder why?”
“Be quiet, bitch.” Devin stormed over to me, grabbing my arm and twisting it behind my back, just like I’d done to Dare on the day we met. His fingers dug into my elbow. I winced, gritting my teeth against the pain. “Don’t confuse him.”
“Why not, Devin? Don’t you want him to understand? You always told me that knowledge was power.”
“October . . .” For a second—just a second—I thought I saw the man I knew behind the blankness in his eyes. “Don’t make this harder than it has to be.”
“Don’t you want him to grow up just like you?” I could see Dare out of the corner of my eye, creeping toward Manuel. Be careful, little girl, I thought, please, be careful . . .
His hand tightened. I could almost feel the bruises forming. “I didn’t want to kill Evening. I worked with her, for you. I let her pretend you were still alive, and so she helped us. She never did it for us. Just for you. I never wanted her dead. But she wouldn’t give me the hope chest, and I needed it, Toby, more than you can dream. You played at being a pureblood, but you know you’ll never be one. You know why I needed it. Changeling time runs out so fast.” He sighed. “She had to die.”
“Why are you telling me this?” I needed to keep him talking, if only for Dare’s sake. That girl was still doing her damnedest to turn me into a hero. “Scooby and the gang aren’t here yet.”
Devin released my arm, stepping away. “I want you to understand that it wasn’t personal. I missed you. I wasn’t lying when I told you that.”
By moving, Devin had given Manuel a clear shot at my entire body. Dare was too far away to reach him in time, and in a way, I was grateful. She wouldn’t get hurt trying to save me.
“You changed.” I turned to look at him, resisting the urge to rub the circulation back into my arm. If I was going to die, I was going to do it with something resembling dignity.
“So did you.” He sounded almost sorry. Then his eyes hardened, the moment passing, and he turned to Manuel. “Take your time, make it hurt. She’ll tell us where she hid it.”
Manuel raised the gun, whispering a prayer. I closed my eyes, hoping his aim was bad and the first bullet would do the job. That it would end quickly.
I didn’t see what came next. I opened my eyes to see Dare leaping onto her brother’s back, momentum sending them both crashing to the floor. The gun went off when it hit the floor, bullet punching through the ceiling. I dove for my own gun an instant too late, shying back as Devin grabbed it from under my hands.
“Toby, get the gun!” Dare shrieked, trying to keep Manuel pinned. He had fifty pounds and six inches on her: there was no way she’d keep him down for long. I pushed myself to my feet, keeping my eyes on Devin. His attention was entirely on Dare, face twisted into an expression that went past rage or sanity. He was gone.
He’d been gone for a long time.
“No one disobeys me!” he snarled.
Dare looked up, eyes going wide, and screamed as the first bullet hit her in the side. Blood sprayed over the wall behind her, hitting Manuel across the face. The terror in her eyes turned to pleading as she glanced toward me, like she was hoping I could take it back. Even then, she thought I’d be her hero.
She finished her scream and jerked back, trying to curl into a ball. It was too late. The next two bullets were close behind the first, and by the time I’d recovered enough to lunge for Devin, her screams had stopped. Manuel was doing the screaming for her. My shoulder caught Devin in the ribs, bowling him over and sending the gun sliding across the floor. I had an instant to wonder where it landed before his foot caught me in the stomach, flinging me back.
I curled around myself, retching, as he climbed back to his feet; his second kick caught me in the chest, sending stabbing pains through my ribs and sternum. “Look what you did! You killed her.” There was no sanity left in his voice: he believed what he was saying. He pulled the trigger, and he still blamed me. Not that it mattered. I’d blame myself enough for both of us.
“Devin . . .” I gasped.
“Shut up!” The scope of the world had narrowed, becoming nothing but Devin, pain, and the growing taste of roses. I think his world had become just as small. He’d abandoned his sanity in the twisting maze of changeling time, and the balance of his blood had thrown him to the point from which there was no coming back. Sitting on the fence isn’t easy. Sometimes the fence breaks, and you fall.
Neither of us expected the gunshot. Devin raised a hand to his chest, touching the stain blooming there before looking back to me, eyes gone terribly wide. Mouth moving with words he never managed to finish, he folded and fell.
Behind him, still crying, Manuel lowered the gun.
The taste of roses rose and burst in the back of my throat, choking me as it dissipated. I hadn’t realized how constant it had become until it was gone. I stood with agonizing slowness; every breath hurt, but at least I was alive. Manuel didn’t move as I walked over and pried the gun from his fingers, dropping it to the floor.
He lifted his head when it hit the ground, expression bleak. “He . . . he . . .”
“Shhh. I know.”
And I put my arms around him, and held him.