Chapter 18

And so there will always be an ending. All stories come to an end, even if it’s only to open out into yet another tale. The hero begins his journey, unsure where the path will take him, and then, after the darkest hour, he emerges victorious. But there’s always an after. Happily ever after may play true in some faerie stories, but it doesn’t hold true in the world.

After Myst’s heartstone shattered, her light went out, and we knew she was dead. As I knelt by the remnants of what had been her essence, we heard a terrible shriek from outside and turned to see a silver streak rise into the air, soaring upward, to vanish in a shower of sparks.

Myst was gone. Truly dead and forever out of our reach.

I forced myself to my feet, then struggled over to Grieve. “Are you all right, love?”

He wiped his hands across his face. “I think so. I am hurt, but I’ll survive.”

Check managed to drag himself forward. Mort helped him. “Your Majesty . . . there are no words. You have saved us all.”

“We will have to hunt down all her minions. We must eradicate all of the Shadow Hunters.” But in my heart, I knew there would always be two still living. For my own soul bore the blood of the Indigo Court, and Grieve was still part of that hybrid race. We would never be free of the taint, but then again, was anything ever 100 percent clear and good and pure? Black and white were mere concepts, with a thousand shades existing between the two extremes.

Weary beyond counting, I stumbled to peer over the drop-off and stared into the blackness. Lannan was down there. Lannan had sacrificed himself to take Myst with him. He’d given me the chance to destroy her heartstone.

“Please, be alive. Please, be down there . . . still alive.” Vampires weren’t easily destroyed. But if he was down there, and sunrise hit, it would kill him. I whirled around. “We have to find Lannan—we have to rescue him if he’s still alive, before sunrise.”

Grieve shook his head. “Do you know how far of a drop that is? No one could survive it.”

“Myst did, because her heartstone was still beating when I destroyed it. Lannan is a vampire. We can’t just assume he’s dead.” I gazed at my beloved, pleading. He stared at me, and I knew that he could see into my heart. I loved Grieve more than life, but I also loved Lannan, and I knew that now. I’d hated him, I’d despised him, and part of me always would, but I needed him.

“I’ll go looking for him. I’m still in good shape.” Mort strode up beside me. He gazed over the edge. “I can make it down there.”

“One of the Wilding Fae might be willing to navigate the drop with a bloodsucker, without a bargain struck.” The Snow Hag gazed at me. “But only if a queen returns to her home to rest and heal.”

“How do we get down? There is no path from here. I can fly, and so can Hunter, but Grieve, Check, and Fearless . . .” I looked around. There was no path from here, and we couldn’t go back the way we came.

“Worry not, my granddaughter. I have called for help on the slipstream. Even now, our people are winging their way to us, and they will be able to safely transport the King and your guards.” Hunter wrapped his arm around me and gave me a long hug.

Sure enough, within a few minutes, several owls flew into the cavern. The storm had died down and the clouds were breaking. For the first time in a long while, the stars shimmered into view. The Uwilahsidhe brought ropes and harnesses and all things needed to get Grieve, Fearless, and Check out of the cavern. Hunter and I shifted into our owl forms and flew out into the night, on calm winds, heading toward the forest below.

* * *

Except for Mortimer and the Snow Hag, we all met back at the Veil House. By now, the temperature had risen a few degrees and the blizzard was gone. The snow would take weeks to melt, but the long winter was ready to give way, and as I flew over the yard, circling before I landed in the branches of the great oak, I thought about my life and the strange sequence of events that had brought me to this point.

I shimmied down the tree, leaping to land in the soft snow below, and stared at the glimmer of lights in the house, suddenly missing Heather again. She had given this house its heart, but now she was gone, with all the rest, and our lives had taken twists that we never could have expected.

As I headed toward the house, Hunter followed behind me. Grateful he had survived, grateful that we had come through with as few losses as we had, I turned to him and held out my hand. He took it, and we silently crossed the top of the snow banks, dancing along the crust, under the watchful eyes of the moon.

* * *

Ysandra welcomed us in with hot mugs of coffee and chocolate. A chicken was roasting in the oven, along with biscuits. As I looked around at the signs of normalcy, it was hard to take in. We’d done it. We’d destroyed Myst. Peyton approached me, a question in her eye. I knew that they wanted to know where everyone was. Who had come through safely, and who remained behind, but I wasn’t ready to speak. I needed to breathe. To walk through the house and know that we were safe.

After a few minutes, I peeled off my clothes, right there in the living room, and Luna hurried to bring me a robe. I slid into it, and then sank into the rocking chair, still mute. Hunter shook his head as Ysandra started to approach me, warning her off.

Another breath, and another. And then, as I accepted a hot cup of coffee spiked with chocolate and the fragrant steam rose to fill my lungs, I finally let out a long sigh and nodded for them to sit.

“Myst is dead. We destroyed her heartstone.” How could I describe the battle? How could I explain the storms we had raised? There were some things too powerful for words. “I . . . We fought. Lannan helped kill her.”

“Lannan . . . He is . . .” Luna’s question hung heavy in the air.

“We don’t know. Mortimer and the Snow Hag are searching for him now.” I swallowed a catch in my throat. “Kaylin saved our lives, but he gave in to his demon to do so, and he’s gone back to the Court of Dreams. His demon had to take over to keep him from dying.”

Luna let out a cry and pressed her hand to her mouth. She hung her head and Peyton reached out to stroke her back.

“Grieve and Check and Fearless survived. The Uwilahsidhe are helping to bring them home. They were wounded.”

“And the rest of the men? The rest of Lannan’s men?” Ysandra reached out but stopped short of taking my hand. Something had changed. There was a gulf between us, and I could feel it, even though I hadn’t been the one to create it.

“Our men are dead. So many have died. The town will never be the same.”

“Maybe not, but we’ll revive it. We’ll make it stronger.” Peyton bit her lip and looked at Luna. “Strict, your advisor, showed up while you were gone. They found Zoey. She killed herself before they could catch her. She must have felt Myst fall.”

Luna let out another choked sob. I caught her gaze. There was something in her eyes—a fatal vision that stared back at me. We’d won. She would have to make good on her promise. I wanted to ask her what would happen now, but too much had passed this night. Too much water under the bridge. We’d lost too many people. I didn’t want to know when we would lose her, too.

“I suppose I should call Regina.” But I made no move for the phone. There were so many things that we needed to do. Aftermath was almost worse than the actual battle.

“And so . . . what next, my friends?” I looked up. “What the fuck do we do now? All our focus has been on destroying Myst. And that’s done.”

“Clear out the Shadow Hunters. Heal the wounded. Bury our dead. Count our blessings that the world won’t fall to Myst’s rule. And plan for what happens next time someone gets it in their head to create an empire. Because you know that there will always be another time, another enemy, another power-crazed fool ready to destroy the world in their attempt to hold it in their grasp.” Ysandra laughed, but her voice cracked, and she began to cry. Luna followed suit, and Peyton. And I sat there, devoid of tears, because I felt so numb that I didn’t know if I’d ever be able to feel much of anything again.

* * *

Even with my apathy, I forced myself to place a call to Regina. She dispatched a host of men to go in search of Lannan. By morning, we hadn’t heard word one from her, and I could only pray they’d found him before the sun drove them back to their lair for the day.

Grieve was hurt, but he would heal. The same with Fearless and Check. The Snow Hag had vanished, but I expected to see her again. Kaylin—I had no clue what happened to Kaylin, and once more, I could only pray he’d found his way to the Court of Dreams safely.

Rhiannon and Chatter returned from the town, where they’d been leading their men in routing the Shadow Hunters from New Forest. They were covered in blood, but unhurt.

And now my cousin and I stood on the back porch of the Veil House, staring as dawn broke in the east. The rosy streaks shimmered across the sky, and though it was still icy cold, the edge in the air had worn off, and here and there we could see icicles melting as the sun rose. It would be weeks before the snow was gone, but the worst of the winter was over, and we were on our way to spring.

“When I came back, I had no clue . . .” I stopped. There was no use in chewing over the past. What was, was gone. What was to come, would be here in good time.

“Was it hard to kill Myst? Were you sorry at all? She was your mother. Once, long ago in a dark faerie tale.” Rhia gave me a smile, and the warmth of her eyes filled me with hope. She was the summer, bright as the sun, and I realized that any time I ever needed to bask in the light, I just had to meet her for lunch.

“You know, there was one point where it all felt so pointless. Where I felt like we were all pawns—including her—in one big joke the universe decided to play.” I paused, then let out a long breath. “But . . . Lannan . . .”

“You mourn him. With all he did to you. . . .”

“With all he did, I miss him. I hope to hell he survived. Tonight, I’ll contact Regina and find out what happened. If they even know. But he saved me. Rhia, Lannan gave me the time I needed to finish Myst for good. He sacrificed himself for us.”

“Maybe he escaped. Maybe he managed to survive.” She put her hand on mine. “Cicely, let your heart be happy. We’ve lost a lot of people, but now, New Forest can recover and be safe. And you and I can go about putting the pieces back together. Summer and Winter.”

“Fire and ice.” I turned to her, taking her hands in mine.

“Amber and jet.”

“We’ll never let them separate us, even though we are worlds apart. The balance must be maintained. Even though we are at odds, we’ll always work together. Promise me that no matter what, we’re still twin cousins.”

Rhia leaned down and placed a kiss on my cheek. “Always, Cicely. Twin cousins. Never to part.”

* * *

The town was digging out. As we made our way through the streets, Regina had told Dakota—Lannan’s main day-runner—to spread the word that Myst was dead. And our men, the warriors of Summer and Winter, were out chasing down the last of the Shadow Hunters, destroying them on sight.

As soon as we managed to reestablish communication with Seattle and the Consortium, we’d enlist their help, and soon, if we were lucky, we’d manage to destroy every remnant of the Indigo Court. Without Myst, the Shadow Hunters would be plunged into chaos, so now was the time to finish them off. And this date would always be a holiday—the day we vanquished a monster.

As we passed what had been Anadey’s diner, Peyton stopped, staring at the building. I slid my arm through hers.

“Are you all right?” I asked as she stared up at the silent neon sign. A FOR SALE sign was posted on the building, and I knew that Peyton would never again darken the doors of the restaurant.

“I don’t even know what to say. I lost my mother when she tried to kill you—and then again when Geoffrey killed her. I lost my father too soon after I found him again. Just so much destruction.” She shook her head. “I’m going to call my father’s Pride in a few weeks and make arrangements to go stay with them for a while. When I come back, I’ll open up my business.”

“What do you think will happen to Luna? Do you think . . .” I didn’t want to ask, but Peyton was the one Luna was talking to most.

“I think that her ancestors and Dorthea will come for her when they’re good and ready. Maybe today. Maybe in ten years. Or twenty. Who knows? None of us ever really know when our time is up, not until we face it head-on.”

“That’s true enough.”

“So Luna’s life is forfeit. She bound herself to a pact, and they fulfilled their promise. She can’t back out of this. But it was something she wanted to do, and our paths are our own to walk. When will they come for her? I have no idea, and I don’t think she does either. But she made the choice willingly. Don’t take away her sacrifice to help us. Don’t make her feel guilty over it.”

“That’s what someone told me about Kaylin, you know.”

“They were right.” Peyton looked like she wanted to say something else, but was holding back.

“Out with it—what is it?”

“Only that . . . Luna was marked the first time we saw her. You saw it in your cards, and so did I. Maybe she was destined to die young. Maybe we saved her for a time, but we can’t stop the Fates. We can’t preordain who lives or dies. You might have the power to kill—to order someone’s death. But ultimately, if that person is meant to live, fate will find a way.”

I let out a soft sigh. “You’re basically saying that if Luna’s meant to go, then nothing we do will stop it.”

“Yeah, I am.”

“I know. I know. I’m tired of losing people.”

“Cicely, accidents happen. War will come as it will. People die. A bullet, a vampire’s fangs, falling on the ice and breaking your neck . . . There’s nothing you can do. No matter how much you want to stop it, nothing you can do will prevent what’s meant to happen. You may be a queen, but you aren’t a goddess.” And then she wrapped her arm around my shoulder. “No matter how much you wish you could control everything, it’s not going to happen.”

“Well, fuck. You just ruined my day with that.” But I was laughing with her, even though I didn’t want to hear what she had to say.

* * *

Ysandra sat in the rocking chair while I perched on the ottoman, watching the flames crackle in the fireplace. She was studying me, and finally, I turned to her. “What are you thinking about?”

“You cannot lead the Moon Spinners now that you are Queen. I’m sorry, but it’s just not possible. I thought I was done with the Consortium, but I’ve decided to remain in my power there, and to change the institution for the better from the inside. But the town needs a witch, and with Magical Charms being Luna’s shop . . .”

“Give her the power of the coven. Let her take over. I don’t know how long she has, but maybe by doing so, you can help her with this damned pact she made with her ancestors. Luna’s a strong bard, and her powers are growing. I don’t know where they’re taking her—I doubt even she does—but I know she could use some guidance.” I reached out, warming my hands on the flames, but they were too hot, and I pulled back. Even though I loved the cozy glow, there was something off-putting about the heat now.

“I was thinking the same thing. I’m glad you concur. When will you return to your Barrow? As much as we love your company, you need to be there. You and Rhiannon need to leave the reorganization of the town to those of us who . . .” She trailed off, then her voice hardened. “To those of us who make our home here. Your Majesty”—she held up her hand when I started to protest—“No. You must wear that crown like you mean it. Your Majesty, forgive me for being blunt, but you don’t belong here anymore. Your people are waiting. They need you.”

I felt like a fledgling being pushed out of the nest. But she was right. The Veil House was no longer my home. New Forest wasn’t my city. This was all a different nation, and I needed to go home.

“We’ll leave tonight, after I find out about Lannan.”

“Go before then. We’ll get word to you. Go home, Your Majesty. Go home.”

* * *

Grieve and I stood on a snow bank, under the moon, staring at the sky. Rhiannon and Chatter had branched off, with their guards, at the fork leading to the Twin Oaks. And now, here we were, standing above the Twin Hollies, staring at the portal that would lead us back to our home.

“Did you ever think we’d end up here?” I turned to my beloved. My heart was still aching, but now it skipped in anticipation. It was time to move ahead, time to step into our future.

“Honestly? No. But long ago I told you that we’d end up together, in the future, and now the future is here, and we are free from the shackles binding us to the past. We’re free to be together, to rule a nation, to create a future.”

And there, in front of our guards, he pulled me to him, and his lips met mine. As he kissed me, my heart swelled, and my wolf growled deeply, but it was a happy growl, a satisfied growl. I sank into the kiss, feeling his love surround me as he embraced me with all of my faults.

“I don’t believe in happy ever after, you know,” I whispered as we pulled apart. “I don’t believe there’s ever an ending. Life just keeps going, and when you finish one adventure, another begins.”

“There’s no such thing as perfection. I don’t expect life to be perfect. I just never want us to get bored with each other.” He stood back, holding me by the shoulders. “We’ll find out about Lannan. I promise you—we’ll find out one way or another.”

“And if he lives . . .” I couldn’t finish the sentence. Grieve had heard me in the cave; he’d heard Myst and he knew.

“If he lives . . . well . . . we’ll have to figure arrangements if and when the time comes. Meanwhile, our kingdom awaits.” And he took my hand as we passed through the portal, into a world where winter never ended, where the snow and ice forever covered the landscape. Where I was Queen of a frozen realm, and Grieve was my King.

* * *

I soared high over my icy realm, reveling in the freedom flight gave me. Hunter swooped past me nearby, and then another owl—and another. My grandfather had brought a host of our people into the realm of Snow and Ice, to live under my rule, and now we took to the skies every moon. It was our tradition, flying high on the wing, hunting in the forest, rejoicing in the feel of the wind on our feathers.

Ulean swept past, laughing as she disrupted our flight. I steadied myself, and then, joy filling my heart, I pushed forward, leapfrogging with her under the light of the moon.

I never thought it could be like this.

Cicely, life is never what we think it will be. If you stop expecting it to look a certain way, to flow in a certain direction, then life has the freedom to become what it needs to be. You just have to remember that your life is not what Rhiannon’s life is, is not what Luna’s life is . . . or Peyton or anyone else you know. Destiny wears a different face for every person.

And then, she was off again, and I swooped, gliding after her. My people turned, following me, as we flew through the chill. The snow would soon be falling again, but here it was natural that it should. As I caught sight of the Barrow, glistening in white, my heart swelled, and I let out a long shriek of joy. I was finally home.

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