Lex Trent versus the Gods

CHAPTER SEVEN

Lex’s definition of a boat was something that travelled on water. The magical boats of the enchanters then, strictly speaking, were not in fact boats, for they hovered above the sea rather than floating on its surface. They were quite different from the gypsy ships. Being propelled by magic instead of wind they could sail against the currents. They could glide above the treacherous coral reefs. And they could keep right on travelling once they hit dry land if they wanted to.

When they reached the docks that morning Schmidt again voiced concerns as to whether they would be able to find an enchanter willing to take them. They rarely took passengers since they had no need for paying customers and it was unheard of for an enchanter to allow non-magical people on board his boat.

‘You’d be amazed at the endless supply of luck I seem to have,’ Lex had said with his most insolent smile.

Schmidt had simply shrugged his bony shoulders. ‘Then I will leave you to it, Mr Trent. You’ll find out it’s hopeless quickly enough.’

There were always enchanted boats at Gandylow as it was the nearest port to the Island of Algathon — the native land of the enchanters and their crones. Khestrii was situated on the western shore of the island and, although there were some humans living there, on the whole people preferred not to live so close to enchanters. There were five enchanted boats in the harbour that day — great, silver monstrosities with black runes painted across their metallic exteriors. Even the sails were thin sheets of metal, being there solely for decoration since the wind certainly didn’t dictate the places these ships went.

Lex stood looking at the five great ships, wondering how best to go about stealing one. For Schmidt was quite right in saying that buying passage would be hopeless. There was no way an enchanter was simply going to allow them to come aboard his precious ship. It was strictly forbidden for any non-magical person to board the boats. Lex had always wanted to steal something from an enchanter. Some little trinket, just for the dangerous thrill of brushing so close to something so powerful. But this wasn’t some little trinket. It was a huge, hulking monster of a ship and stealing it would not be so easy.

Lex eyed the staff of a nearby enchanter warily. It was as tall as the wizard himself, made out of twisted metal and set with a blue star-crystal at the top. The staffs were the centre of all the enchanters’ powers and it was said that they could turn a man inside out if they wanted to, just by pointing at him with their horrible sticks. Lex grinned as Schmidt caught sight of the enchanter and hurriedly turned away, pretending to inspect a shut-up stall to avoid having to look directly at the magician.

But Lex wasn’t afraid and remained where he was. As divine luck would have it, his dilemma was solved for him, for whilst he stood musing over the problem of the boats, he happened to overhear the conversation that took place between the nearby enchanter and his crone.

‘It will be your responsibility to guard the ship until I return,’ the enchanter said.

Lex’s ears pricked up at that. He eyed the old crone with dubious glee. She hardly looked capable of guarding anything. She was hunched over the usual pair of sticks, her gnarled old hands shaking on them slightly, and she was bent almost double under the weight of the slim grey cat that was draped languidly about her shoulders.

‘I will be gone for seven days and nights. You will stay on the ship. Do not leave it for anything. Not for anything, you understand?’ he snapped, leaning a little closer to the old woman. ‘Do not fail me again, Bessa. If anyone inquires as to the ship’s prolonged presence here, you may tell them that I will return shortly and that the boat is not to be touched by anybody until then, not even the maritime authorities. I won’t have any non-magical people on board my ship.’

The crone nodded and grovelled to the wizard, assuring him all the while of her eternal and undying devotion. Lex chuckled with glee. It really was too easy. The old woman would go over like a house of cards.

‘What are you sniggering at?’ Schmidt said sharply, without looking away from the stall.

Lex ignored him. Of course, the crones were often left behind to look after the ships. It wasn’t as if anyone was actually going to try and steal them. Such an action would have been reckless beyond words. Lex watched the old crone hobble painfully up the gangplank back on board the huge, gleaming silver ship. It was not touching the water, even here in the harbour. It hovered unnaturally, just above the sea, secured by ropes to the docks, drifting ever so slightly in the force of the wind from the ocean.

‘Voila!’ Lex exclaimed as soon as the enchanter had left for the town. ‘And here we have our transportation, Mr Schmidt.’

‘Where?’ the lawyer asked, gazing round stupidly.

Lex pointed at the ship. ‘There.’

‘Don’t be ridiculous. Didn’t you hear that enchanter say he was going away for a week? I won’t wait here for a week; I want to be off today so we can get this whole sorry mess over and done with. You’ll have to go and bargain with one of the other enchanters.’

‘Bargain? My dear Monty, who ever said anything about bargaining?’

Schmidt frowned at him. ‘But you said you were going to get us passage on board one of the enchanters’-’

‘They’ll never take us!’

‘Then how are you going to-?’

‘I’m going to pinch it!’ Lex declared gleefully.

He allowed himself a moment to take in the expression of utter horror on his employer’s face and then ducked smoothly under his arm as the old lawyer made a grab for him. In another moment, he had fled lightly up the gangplank and was staring down over the side of the ship, grinning at Mr Schmidt.

‘Get back down here,’ the lawyer hissed.

Or something of that sort. He was too far away for Lex to be able to hear him but the body language was quite plain.

‘Make me,’ Lex laughed and then disappeared into the ship in search of the defenceless old crone.

The thrill at finally being on an enchanter’s ship was immense. It was dangerous. Of course it was dangerous. The enchanter would be furious, incensed when he found out. But it was irresistible at times — that urge to plummet recklessly into something that all sane men would shrink from. And after a year of stealing nothing more thrilling than trinkets from museums, an enchanter’s ship would be a fine prize indeed. What better way to begin the Game against the Gods?

Lex walked over to a door on the deck, trying to find a way into the ship. Schmidt would follow him. After all, he had no choice. If they didn’t eat together then he would only find himself stranded in Lex’s body anyway.

Lex opened the door and stopped dead. He was standing at the foot of an immensely long corridor. But he was not alone. There were hundreds and hundreds of other Lex’s on either side of him, above him and below him, each looking as disoriented as he was. The hallway was entirely mirrored. The walls, the floor and the ceiling, reflected back at each other into infinity. Lex shuddered.

He was only allowed a moment of discomfort however, since the sounds of labouring coming from outside told him that his employer was making his way up the long gangplank and it was important that they got under way before the old lawyer tried to bodily drag him from the ship. Lex started to walk carefully down the corridor, both arms stretched out so that his fingers brushed against each wall in an attempt to keep himself oriented.

It reminded him of the fayre his grandfather, Alistair Trent, had taken him to when he’d been little. It had all been fun and games until he had scared himself by getting lost in the Maze of Mirrors. When he had at last caught sight of his grandfather, he had made a grateful dash towards him, not realising it was only his reflection he was chasing, and had crashed straight into a mirror, smacking his head and splitting his lip. He had started bawling then and his grandfather had had to buy him a big stick of blue candyfloss to shut him up. You don’t run in mirror mazes, although many children, it seemed, were destined to find that out the hard way.

The mirrored walls were so flawless that it was only the feel of a hinge beneath his fingers that alerted Lex to the fact that there was a door. There was no doorknob or handle but when he pushed the mirrored glass, it swung open easily and silently into a room that, he noted with relief, was not lined with mirrors.

It was a tiny little white box-of-a-room because the walls, floors and ceiling were made entirely out of white marble. It was completely bare but for one basket in the corner, in which the old crone was hunched, her sticks leaning against the wall, the grey cat about her shoulders, staring into space.

‘It’s Bessa, isn’t it?’ Lex asked pleasantly.

At the sound of his voice, the crone flinched as if she had been struck and was on her feet at a speed that was remarkable for a woman so obviously crippled.

‘Get out! ’ she shrieked, grabbing her sticks and hobbling out of the basket. ‘Out!’

‘Don’t be like that, Bessa,’ Lex drawled. ‘Wherever are your manners-?’

He broke off rather suddenly as she whacked him across the chest with one of her sticks. For such an infirm old lady, there was certainly a lot of force behind that stick. He grunted in surprise and staggered back into the mirrored hallway, wincing because she had struck the tender bruises he had acquired just three nights ago falling from the roof of the museum. He ducked sharply, barely missing the stick that whipped past his head, and then jumped back with equal speed to avoid a vicious blow from the second stick.

‘I just want to talk!’ he exclaimed, holding up his hands in what he hoped was a pacifying manner.

He had expected her to be upset, to shout even, but this kind of viciousness was ridiculous. Who would have thought the old woman would be armed?

‘Get off! Get off! Get off my master’s ship you vile scourge!’ She was virtually sobbing. Lex was forced to back away from her as she kept coming at him, both sticks flailing.

‘Steady on,’ he tried. ‘You’ll dislocate a hip or something if you’re not careful.’

But she wasn’t listening. She wasn’t even speaking now, just shrieking at an earsplitting pitch. Lex turned and ran down the corridor back towards the door that led onto the deck. The dreadful wailing didn’t stop and when Lex risked a glance back over his shoulder he saw that the old crone was coming after him at a high-speed hobble, her long skirts flapping around her crooked legs, her many amulets getting tangled up together and the grey cat still draped over her shoulders. Her face was contorted into an expression of pure anguish as she pursued him as fast as her crippled body would allow.

Lex had always had rather a cruel sense of humour and the sight of the old woman trying to run after him made him burst out into helpless laughter so that by the time he neared the end of the corridor he was bent almost double with it. What on earth did she think she’d be able to do if she caught him? Whatever made her think that giving chase would be a good idea when he was probably at least ten times stronger than her? The image so amused Lex that he found he could manage no more than a stagger himself even though he was aware that the horrible old witch was catching up with him.

He almost crashed into Schmidt as he appeared in the doorway. ‘Get out of the way!’ he shrieked through his laughter. ‘She’s going to get me!’

The lawyer backed away from the doorway in obvious alarm. Lex was blocking his view of the old woman but her insane wailing made it sound like some awful, banshee-like monster was giving chase.

Lex broke out into the fresh air of the silver deck and tried to stop laughing. When the wild old crone appeared in the doorway, Lex treated her to a mocking bow. ‘I’ve had some high-speed chases in my time, Bessa, but yours was by far the most thrilling. I don’t know when I’ve ever been more scared for my life.’

The crone glared at him, angry tears rolling down her withered cheeks. Schmidt stared at the old woman and then back at Lex. ‘What in God’s name did you do to her?’ he snapped before turning back to the crone. ‘I am sorry, ma’am, if this boy said anything to offend you. Please allow me to-urgh!’

The lawyer, who had been walking towards the old lady, broke off abruptly as one of her sticks clipped him across the side of the head.

‘ Get off my master’s ship! ’ she screamed.

Lex dissolved into laughter once again at the delightful sight of his employer reeling back in alarm from the old lady with the decidedly deadly walking sticks. His laughter was short lived however, when she scuttled up to him and managed a well-aimed blow directly to the stomach. Lex bent over double, momentarily robbed of air, gasping for breath, his eyes watering. He was only saved from a second skull-shattering blow by Schmidt’s fortuitously timely recovery as he succeeded in wrestling the sticks from the mad old woman, whereupon she promptly lost her balance and fell over onto the gleaming silver deck.

‘Calm yourself, madam,’ the lawyer exclaimed. ‘No one is going to harm you. Are you all right, Lex?’

‘What do you think?’ Lex wheezed.

‘Serves you right!’ the old lawyer retorted.

Lex straightened up with an effort and took a step towards the sprawled crone. ‘All we want is the boat, you mad old bat!’ he snarled.

That last strike had evaporated Lex’s previous good humour. Who would have thought one old woman could have given Lex Trent so much trouble? His temper flared angrily at the thought. ‘How does the ship run?’ he asked.

‘Horrible boy! I’ll never tell you! Never!’ the crone wept. ‘Bessa is a loyal servant to her master!’

Lex looked down as something brushed against his legs. It was the crone’s grey cat. It must have fallen from her shoulders when she lost her balance. A thought occurred to Lex and a nasty smile tugged at his mouth. He picked up the animal and in a few strides he was at the edge of the ship, his arm outstretched over the side with the terrified cat dangling in his hand, so many feet above the ocean below.

The crone screamed in horror.

‘How does it run?’ Lex asked with an uncharacteristic maliciousness.

‘Piewacket!’ the old woman sobbed. ‘Don’t hurt him! Don’t drop him! He fears the water! He cannot swim!’

‘I won’t be able to help it in a minute, the way he’s thrashing around,’ Lex said, struggling to maintain his grip on the frantic animal. ‘For God’s sake, just tell me how to get the ship moving!’

‘That’s enough, Lex!’ Schmidt snapped. ‘Put the cat down!’

‘How does the ship work?’ Lex asked again, staring at the crone.

‘I will tell you. Only give Piewacket back to me and I will tell you!’

Lex slowly retracted his arm, bringing the cat back over the side of the boat. He had meant to maintain his grip on the animal but disgruntled cats are not so easy to keep hold of without being scratched to pieces and he dropped the creature instinctively as it succeeded in sinking its claws into his arm.

Lex cursed as it scampered back to the crone, jumping onto her humped back and draping itself round her shoulders once again, staring evilly at Lex with its ears flat against its ugly head.

‘It’s a magical key, down below,’ the crone said. ‘For all the good the knowledge will do you, nasty boy; my master has taken the key with him!’

‘Show me.’

Mr Schmidt protested most vigorously as Lex forced the old crone before them, down the maze of mirrored hallways within the great ship. Lex had given her one of her sticks back but the other he had snatched from Schmidt and thrown into the sea. She was unable to attack them with just the one stick for she needed it to keep her balance. Schmidt had protested about that, too, but Lex had cut him off short with a bit of timely truth: ‘We have to be in Khestrii by sunset tomorrow or else we’ll be too late to reach the Black Tower. There’s no way of getting there that fast without using magical means.’

‘Black Tower? What’s that got to do with anything? What are you babbling about?’ the lawyer asked, staring at him suspiciously. ‘I will not be made an accomplice in such reprehensible criminal activity!’

‘If you don’t come with me to Khestrii then you won’t ever be free of the bracelets,’ Lex said. ‘You’ll be stuck with me, Mr Schmidt, until the end of your days. However long that might be. Don’t worry about stealing the ship,’ he winked at him. ‘I won’t tell anybody you helped.’

He pushed the crone on down the corridor as she led them to the ‘Bone Room’, as she called it. It had been an enjoyable thing, watching Schmidt wrestle with himself over the problem. For Lex was right. Unless they stole this ship, right now, then they would not get to Khestrii for a very long time. It could take weeks — months, even. Mr Schmidt was a moral man. He was against crime. But he didn’t want to be stuck with a body that was not his own, joined to a person that he loathed, saddled with the company of a selfish, contemptible fool for the rest of his life. And they had come this far already…

‘We’re not stealing it,’ he said at last. ‘We’re just borrowing it.’

‘It starts with all of us like that,’ Lex said, grinning.

It was not long before they were both completely disoriented because of the cursed mirrors that were everywhere. Eventually the crone stopped and pushed open a mirrored door and they stepped into a cream-coloured room, made entirely of ivory. They must have ended up at the top of the ship for panoramic windows ran all the way round the circular room, showing the view of the sea stretching out before them to one side, the sprawling docks to the other.

The walls, the floor and the window seat running around the panoramic windows were all made from the same polished ivory. The large floor was bare but for an ivory basin stood on a pedestal in the centre of the room. When Lex walked over to it he saw that it held salt water.

‘The master’s key goes in there,’ Bessa crowed. ‘His magic bone is the key for the Bone Room that makes the ship fly. It is a magic bone, shaped like a fish. He took it with him. You cannot work the ship without it,’ she finished triumphantly.

‘Magic bone,’ Lex muttered, fingering the Wishing Swanns through their pouch in his pocket and taking in the ivory room.

He turned with a smile to the crone. ‘Tell me, Bessa, does it have to be a particular magic bone or will any one do?’

The crone stared at him suspiciously. ‘You have no magic bone, horrible boy. Only great enchanters have them, horrible liar!’

Lex laughed softly as he drew the velvet pouch out of his pocket and tipped the three beautiful Swanns out onto the palm of his hand. There was the black obelisk one and the one carved from deep red bloodstone. But it was the pale cream Swann made from ivory that he selected. He glanced at the trembling crone. ‘As luck would have it,’ he said with a grin, ‘I happen to have a little magic bone of my own right here.’

He ignored the crone’s little screech of alarm…

… and dropped the ivory Swann into the basin.

Dockhands and sailors ducked for cover as great wooden shards splintered in all directions. A great chunk of the harbour was ripped away by one of the enchanted boats suddenly soaring out over the sea, easily tearing free of the ropes that anchored it and taking half the harbour with it.

Wooden splinters crashed through the shut-up stalls of the midnight market and embedded themselves in the hulls of the other boats anchored in the harbour. Lex, Schmidt and Bessa were all thrown to the ivory floor with the vicious suddenness of the movement, water sloshing over from the basin in the centre and Bessa’s one remaining cane skittering across the well-polished floor.

Lex recovered first, pulling himself up by one of the window seats and staring back at the chaotic harbour as the ship flew ever further away, not even touching the waves beneath them. He took in the damage that had been done by virtue of the great ship’s strength and laughed delightedly. ‘I hope we didn’t impale anybody back there.’

Schmidt staggered to his feet and joined Lex at the window, gasping in horror at the damage that had been done.

‘My God, Lex, don’t you care anything for the safety of other people?’

Lex waved a hand dismissively. ‘I’m sure no one was hurt,’ he said, stepping over the sprawled crone to the basin and looking in at the Swann resting on the bottom.

After that sudden shock of movement the boat seemed remarkably calm considering the speed at which it was travelling. There was no rocking on the waves as there had been on the gypsy ship for this magical boat was hardly sailing at all; it was flying over the restless ocean, not even touching the water.

‘How do you get it to stop?’ Lex asked the crone.

But even as he spoke the words, the ship slowed rapidly until it had come to a complete halt, hovering over the waves, the harbour now some way behind them.

‘Aha,’ Lex said with a slow grin.

‘It reads the mind of the key holder,’ Bessa said miserably.

‘What are you stopping for anyway? I thought you were all eager to be away?’ Schmidt asked.

‘Yes, but we don’t want any unwanted passengers, Monty,’ Lex said, smiling horribly at the old crone.

Half an hour later, Bessa was sat hunched up in her basket, which was floating on the surface of the ocean next to the great ship. They’d lowered her down over the side with ropes, having been forced to use the basket in the absence of any lifeboats.

‘It seems to be floating well enough. What did I tell you?’ Lex said to the lawyer.

Schmidt gazed back at him coldly. The old crone was still screaming for her bloody cat, which seemed to have disappeared into the ship somewhere.

‘She’ll be able to row back to shore all right with that, she’s got an oar. And she has her cane. What more does she need?’

‘You’re the most selfish person I’ve ever met,’ Schmidt said coldly. ‘You really don’t care about anyone at all, do you? She will be punished by her enchanter.’

‘She’ll be in more trouble if she stays with us. And, like you said, we are only borrowing the boat.’

‘Yes,’ Schmidt replied with a horrible smile. ‘So I know you won’t mind leaving her with a deposit. As you fully intend to bring the ship back.’

‘Deposit? What dep-?’

Lex broke off in pure horror as the lawyer suddenly grabbed his bag which had been lying on the deck and threw it overboard where it landed with a splash next to the crone, who promptly pulled it into her basket, crowing with glee at the valuable nature of the things inside.

‘How dare you!’ Lex hissed, rounding angrily on the lawyer. ‘How dare you! Do you know how long it took me to collect all those beautiful things? Do you know how hard I had to work to get them?’

‘It hurts, doesn’t it, Lex? Losing things that are important to you? Good, I’m glad you’re upset.’

Discipline, Lex told himself. He’s baiting you. Don’t rise to it

… Don’t rise to it… After all, he still had his money belt — not that Schmidt needed to know anything about that…

‘I’m not upset, Mr Schmidt,’ Lex said with exaggerated politeness. ‘Just a little concerned about how we’re going to finance our journey now that you’ve given away all my valuables. After all, I have no money now and there will be travelling expenses and food expenses and things… but that’s okay because you still have your wallet, don’t you? I must say it’s very sportsmanlike of you to agree to pay for all this out of your own pocket, Mr Schimdt,’ Lex gloated, noting with relish the distinctly unhappy expression that was now on his employer’s face.

‘Didn’t think it through, did you?’ Lex asked, with sudden coldness. ‘It takes practice, you know, swindling people. You really shouldn’t try it unless you’re absolutely sure it won’t backfire on you.’

He glanced over the edge of the ship. ‘You know, Monty, I have the sneaking suspicion that you might have overpaid her.’

The old crone was paddling for the shore as fast as her oar would take her, one arm still crooked around Lex’s bag.