Castle Spellbound

QUEEN'S DINING HALL

"I say we split up into pairs and fan out," Dalton said as he stirred his coffee.

"Not a bad idea," Gene said. "We only have to check 144,000 holes to see which one they might be coming through."

"True, it's a huge job."

"Though I suppose it's got to be done."

"Right."

"Because, even as we speak…"

Three homunculi were busy sweeping up the dining room. As Gene and his friends watched, two more came in to help.

"But he can't check every aspect," Thaxton said.

"Let's hope we get lucky," Dalton said.

"And what exactly is our plan when we do find the portal the little beggars are coming through?"

Dalton shrugged and sipped his coffee.

"I'll tell you what we do," Deena Williams said. "We get some bricks and mortar and wall up that damn hole."

"A thought," Thaxton said.

"It's spooky." Deena shivered.

"No, we let Lord Incarnadine deal with them," Barnaby Walsh said.

"How come he ain't dealin' with 'em now?"

"Well, I don't know. I suppose-"

"Hey, there she is," Deena said.

Everyone looked up at Linda as she came walking over to the long dining table.

"Hi, gang."

"Linda, where you been?"

"Following little strange critters."

"So have we," Dalton said. "Did you happen to find out where they're coming from?"

"Nope," Linda said, pouring herself some coffee. "Tried. They're all over the place."

"Craziest thing," Deena said, shaking her head. "They give me the creeps."

"Oh, they're cute, in a way," Linda said, watching one of them diligently sweep by.

"Cute? They're disgustin', that's what they are."

"Aw, not really. They remind me of Elmer Fudd."

"I don't care if they look like Bugs Bunny. I want 'em outta here."

"How many of them are there, do you think?" Thaxton asked of the group.

"I counted hundreds," Linda said. "Hundreds and hundreds. No matter where I went, there they were."

"There are very possibly thousands of them," Dalton said. "Even so, I don't think the castle's in any immediate danger. In any event, we really should inform Tyrene."

"I saw him," Linda said. "Upstairs in the gymnasium, chasing the little devils around. He and some of the Guards. Until they gave up. There were over three hundred of them just in there."

"They seem to be increasing geometrically," Dalton said.

"And they don't say a word," Thaxton said. "Not a bloody word."

"We'll see," Gene said, getting to his feet. One of the homunculi was sweeping a path toward him. He got in front of it.

"Excuse me. Uh, say, little buddy… " It began to sweep a circle around him.

"Yo! Hey, there. Have a minute?" Gene shifted position to block the diminutive creature's path.

It turned and began to sweep in the opposite direction. Gene reached and grabbed the creature by the shoulder straps where they crossed at the back. The little fellow immediately went limp.

Gene picked the thing up. "Doesn't weigh much at all."

"Gene, be careful!" Linda said. "You might hurt it."

"Not to worry."

Gene gently lowered the creature to the floor and let go of the straps. After a moment, its head came up. Then it moved away from Gene, beginning its task once again, applying the broom quickly, methodically, sedulously.

"Completely passive," Dalton said. "Can't see how they'd be any danger at all. Just a nuisance."

"But what if they don't stop comin' through?" Deena demanded.

"The castle's a big place," Dalton said. "We have some time yet before we're hip-deep in them."

"Surely Incarnadine can deal with them," Thaxton said.

Dalton asked Linda, "Have you seen him lately?"

"I asked Tyrene if he'd told the king. He said he has men out trying to locate him."

"He probably knows already," Thaxton said. "And is already dealing with the matter."

"Maybe the king suddenly took off on one of his extended sojourns," Gene suggested.

"He was at the party when I left," Linda said.

"I saw him leave with Trent," Barnaby Walsh said.

"That's right, he did," Dalton agreed.

"I shouldn't think they went far," Thaxton said.

"Hope not," Linda said.

"But what if Incarnadine can't deal with these little guys?" Deena asked nervously.

Heads turned as two more little guys with brooms entered the room.

"Then I suppose we'll have to learn to live with them," Dalton commented.

"Not me!" Deena said. "That happens, I'm pickin' an aspect an' puttin' my bod right through it. I ain't never comin' back."

"We're hardly at that point yet," Thaxton said. "Don't fret."

"Too late, I'm frettin' already."

Gene said, "I say we take Cleve's suggestion. Split up and reconnoiter, report back here in, say, two hours."

"We'll never find out where they're coming from," Deena said.

"If we find areas of the castle where they aren't, that will whittle down the possibilities a bit. I can't believe they're all over the castle yet. They're coming from somewhere, and we should find out where that somewhere is."

"What if the source isn't an aspect?" Dalton asked.

Gene shrugged. "What are the other possibilities?"

"Yes, where else could they be coming from?" Thaxton asked.

Dalton thought about it for a moment. Then he said, "The castle itself."

Gene nodded. "I guess it's possible."

"Another version of castle instability," Dalton went on. "We've run into all kinds. Walls shaking, parts of the place disappearing. Remember the apparitions? Well, this may be another variety of them."

"These critters seem a little too real," Linda said.

"True," Dalton conceded.

"Which is why we have to eliminate the possibility of another invasion," Gene said. "These guys could be the setup for a takeover."

Thaxton laughed. "By tidying up? The invaders are sticklers for cleanliness, are they?"

"Stranger things have happened in this castle," Dalton said.

"Well, I'll admit anything's possible. But surely an invasion's out. I mean, I've heard of mopping up, but-"

"We'd better get started," Gene urged. "The wider the dispersion gets, the harder it'll be to pinpoint the center of it."

"Gene's right," Dalton said.

"Thing is," Linda put in, "everywhere I went in the keep, there they were."

"How far did you get?" Gene asked. "Pretty far into the west wing. Down about ten floors. Gene, they're probably all over the keep."

Gene shook his head glumly. "Then we'll never find the hole they're pouring through."

Dalton said, "But we really should give it a try, shouldn't we?"

"Better to have a go at finding Incarnadine, maybe?" Thaxton suggested.

Deena agreed. "Now there's an idea. And Trent, too. We're gonna need all the help we can get."

"And Sheila," Linda said. "Speaking of super magicians. We might have to improvise until the king gets back, if he went anywhere."

Dalton started to say, "Nevertheless, some of us-" Everybody cocked an ear.

"What is it?" Deena asked. They all listened.

Deena seemed annoyed. "Music?"

The sound of a far-off drum grew closer. Accompanying a flute or pipe. The rhythm was exotic and infectious.

"I hear music," Dalton confirmed.

"Now what the hell is goin' on?" Deena despaired.

"Whatever it is," Gene said, "it's coming this way. Pass the sugar, will you, Lord Peter?"

Thaxton handed him the pewter sugar bowl. "Thank you."

In a few moments the source was revealed. A belly dancer-an extremely shapely one-came shivering and shaking into the dining hall. Accompanying her were two musicians, a drummer and a piper, in vaguely Arabic dress.

They proceeded to put on a show. Everybody watched. The woman whirled and clanged her finger cymbals, slinking up to the men and undulating suggestively. She danced twice around the table and then began to writhe and twirl out of the room, followed by the musicians.

Linda watched with interest. "She's really good," was her comment to Gene.

"Uh, yeah."

"Beautiful woman!" Dalton enthused.

"Uh, yeah," Gene said.

"Very charming," Thaxton observed.

"However do they do that-?" Dalton made motions in front of his stomach.

"Diaphragm exercises," Thaxton said.

Before the first dancer-musician troupe got to the door, another entered and began to repeat the whole routine, threading their way through the ever-growing clot of broomwielding homunculi. The group at the table sat and watched this performance as well, though a little less appreciatively.

"Charming, absolutely charming," Thaxton remarked. "But you know, I'm beginning to get worried."

"Housecleaning homunculi," Dalton pondered, drumming the table with his long fingers. "And belly dancers." He thought about it a while." Then he gave sigh. "Frankly, I don't see the connection.

Gene said, "Well, it's all so obvious, isn't it?"

Gene calmly drank his coffee as yet another distant drum drew nearer.

Deena said, "Uh-oh."