Blood, Smoke and Mirrors

Chapter Fourteen

“Help her, she’s wounded,” Lex demanded. He laid me down on the floor and I watched the earthen ceiling spin above me, reminding me of my first appearance in this room.

Cecelia turned to the faerie on her right. “Horatio, if you would be so kind?”

Horatio stood and walked over to me. He was short, squat, with rough brown skin that indicated an earth faerie of some variety. For a moment he looked me over, and then nonchalantly waved a hand above my body. Warm, soothing energy spread through me, and the pain and faint feeling faded away.

“Thank you,” I said softly. The faerie’s head inclined slightly at my words as he returned to his seat. Lex helped me to my feet, and we stood together in front of the council.

“Congratulations, you’ve both performed well during the trials,” Cecelia announced, and I frowned. Both of us? “Catherine Marie Morrow, it is the belief of this council that you have proven yourself to be able to adequately perform the tasks of Titania of your region. We offer you this position, and if you accept it you will be initiated during the next full moon of your realm. Do you understand?”

“I do.”

“Do you agree to these terms?”

“Yes.”

“Very well,” she replied, nodding in satisfaction. Cecelia turned to Lex. “Alexander Duquesne, when it became apparent that you are Miss Morrow’s soul mate we endeavored to include you in the testing process. Though you did not participate in the first test, it is the belief of this council that you have proven yourself adequate to perform the tasks of Oberon for your region. You will serve as Oberon jointly with Catherine as Titania, but you cannot be both guardian and Oberon. Therefore, if you accept this, you must forfeit your position as guardian and the abilities that accompany it. We offer you this position, and if you accept it you will be initiated during the next full moon of your realm. Do you understand?”

Silence hung heavily in the air for a long, numb moment. The words “soul mate” stuck in my thoughts, tumbling over and over. Lex had said that we shared a connection, but it hadn’t occurred to me that it was a connection. Soul mates are a rare thing-a person might live through several life cycles and never come across their soul mate. The idea that I’d found mine was shocking, and the idea that I’d almost let him slip away from me was even more so. Glancing over at him, I saw his expression was carefully controlled, not letting any hint of his thoughts show through.

“If I refuse, will Catherine still become Titania?”

My heart sank-he didn’t want to work with me. I suppose I should’ve expected that. Lex hadn’t been willing to jeopardize his position for me before, I guess it’d been foolish to hope he’d be willing to do it now, soul mates or not. I was such an idiot for trusting him again.

“Yes. Though I feel I should warn you that her position will be weakened if you choose not to become Oberon. Do you agree to these terms?” Cecelia asked.

“I need more time to consider.”

“Very well. You will have until the full moon to make your decision. Until you make your choice, you will not be allowed use of your guardian powers or responsibilities, as they may unduly influence you. You both may go now, blessed be.” With a very slight bow of her silvery head she dismissed us, and we were transported into my apartment. Lex and I stood in front of the mirror in my bedroom.

Tossing my top hat onto the bed, I crossed the room and snapped on the lights. Opening the door, I headed into the kitchen, where I turned the lights on and started to wash the blood from my hands. I didn’t turn to see if Lex followed. I wasn’t sure what I’d say to him at the moment.

It was strangely quiet in my apartment. The air conditioner in my bedroom was off, and my cats were still in Faerie. Once my hands were clean I looked down and noticed the bloody stab wounds in my shirt. “Great,” I muttered. I really needed to add some Kevlar to my wardrobe.

Returning to the bedroom, I found Lex still standing where I’d left him. His lost, haunted expression was almost enough to suck all the anger right out of me. Almost.

“You gonna stand there all night?” I began unlacing the cuffs of my swordswoman shirt. I needed a shower to clean up. I had a feeling that either we were going to be showering together in a fun way, or we were going to have a big fight and I’d be crying alone in the shower afterwards.

I wasn’t giving myself good odds on the fun option.

“You’re going to turn it down, aren’t you?”

Looking up at me, he frowned. “It’s not a simple decision, Cat.”

“No shit, Sherlock, but everybody around me bullied me into trying to be Titania. Oh, you’ll be so good at it, it’s for the good of the region. Blah, blah, blah.” With the cuffs unlaced, I started on the collar of the shirt. “Not so fun when the shoe’s on the other foot, is it?”

“This is different.” He slowly flexed the fingers of his right hand, staring down at it as though it’d fallen asleep and he was trying to restore feeling to it.

“No it’s not.”

“You’re asking me to-”

“To give up your life? The thing that makes you special? To be outcast from your family and friends?” I interrupted. “Gee, sounds familiar somehow.”

“That’s not funny.”

“I’m not laughing, Lex.” Tugging the shirt off, I held the garment up to the light. It looked like a piece of evidence on a crime show. I almost considered keeping it as a souvenir, but decided to toss it instead. I started to walk out of the room to pitch it into the trash in the kitchen, but I paused as I passed Lex. His magic smelled different-instead of the muddled mix I associated with guardian, he now had the sharp winter chill of an ice sorcerer.

“At least you still have magic,” I commented. “Was your family made up of sorcerers before they became guardians?”

“How’d you know that?” he asked, surprised.

I shrugged in reply, and then continued out into the kitchen and tossed my shirt into the garbage. Lex followed me this time and stood hovering in the doorway. “Bein’ a guardian is more than a position, it’s my entire life. It’s who I am. Duquesnes have been guardians for generations. There was never a question of what I’d be when I grew up, only a question of where I’d serve. You’re askin’ me to give all that up, and not only for me, but maybe even for my children.”

Our children, I corrected silently. My eyes stung and I turned away, standing over the sink as I fought to keep my composure. There’s very little sunshine and rainbows in being a magician-being able to do magic makes your life harder, not easier, and finding your soul mate isn’t a guarantee for a romantic happily ever after. My odds of a happily ever after seemed to be shrinking by the minute. Taking a deep breath, I turned and faced him again.

“Look, I know you didn’t know this was coming, and I’m sorry. I had no idea about the soul mates thing, and even if I did, I wouldn’t have expected this from the council. I’ve never heard of anything like it before,” I said, trying to placate him. Crossing to the kitchen table, I plopped down into a chair, intending to remove my boots, but then I noticed an odd expression on Lex’s face. He was hiding something. “You didn’t know, right? That this was coming? Did you?”

“I didn’t know that they’d offer Oberon to me.”

“But you knew about the soul mates?” I asked incredulously, and he nodded. “For how long?” Annoyed, I unknotted my bootlaces and started loosening them.

“Since the attack at Silverleaf castle, when you picked up the spear. There’re protective spells on it-only a guardian can handle a guardian’s weapon. Anyone else who tries is wounded when they touch it, but you weren’t. It didn’t harm you ’cause your aura’s in tune with my magic. It’s the same reason I keep gettin’ past your shields.”

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

“I don’t know. I guess I thought you had enough to worry about right now without hearin’ that too. Would it have changed anything?”

“I had a right to know.” My fingers clenched around the chunky heel of my boot as I seriously considered hurling it at his head, but then I forced myself to drop it. The boots hit the floor with a loud thump, one after the other. I could not believe that he didn’t tell me something that important.

“What are you doing?” Lex raised an eyebrow, seeming confused.

“Gonna take a shower.”

“Don’t you think you should-” he paused, and then frowned.

“Should what? Wait for you to stop being a jerk about this? Then I’d never get to shower.” Hell might freeze over before he stopped being a jerk.

“I’m not-”

“Lex, when you were picturing our future together, did you see yourself making any changes at all? Or did you just move me into your house and expect I’d go with the flow?”

His gaze dropped to the floor and he ran a hand over his hair. “I guess I did. Cat, this is what I am. Bein’ a guardian is all I know how to be.”

“Yeah, well, being a witch is all I knew how to be, and when I was cast out, I got through it. I learned how to live as something else, and now I’m going to learn how to be Titania.” I peeled my socks off and plopped them into the boots, and then shoved them under the table. “When you figure out what you want to do, you let me know, but in the meantime I think it’s best that you leave.” Standing, I placed my hands on my hips and stared him down. It was a toss-up whether I was angrier with him than I was at myself. I was such an idiot, I couldn’t believe I’d fallen for him again, only to be reminded that I’d always place a distant second to his guardian responsibilities. Apparently even something as momentous as finding his soul mate wasn’t worth interfering with them.

“Cat, don’t be that way.” He sighed.

“What way? Is it really so much to ask that just once I be worth sacrificing something for? My father wasn’t willing to give up his search for power to be with me and my mother. My mother wasn’t willing to give up on getting my father back and just take care of me. You weren’t willing to risk your position to keep my secret safe from the council. Just once, I’d like to be enough, you know?”

“Cat.”

“Just go. Please,” I said, leaving no room for argument in my tone.

He left.