Bitter Sweet Love

Chapter Nine

The first thing I learned about New York City was that people were everywhere—in elevators, on the sidewalks, in the streets and inside all the shops. I’d never been around so many at once, and while they knew that Wardens existed, none of them seemed to notice that we were any different—at least those who didn’t look too closely at our eyes. The color was too pale to be human, and in my small town, everyone noticed.

But not here.

Everyone was too busy trying to get to wherever it was they were going, or they were enthralled with the sights, much as I was.

I couldn’t stop staring up and I knew everything about me screamed tourist, but the heights of the buildings, and the sheer number of them, was truly astonishing. And then there were all the flashing signs and bright lights.

“Hungry?” Dez asked.

“Yes.” I placed a hand on my belly. We’d walked so many blocks I’d lost count. “You?”

“Always. How about some authentic New York pizza?”

A grin split my lips. Another block down, he spied a pizza shop right in the middle of Times Square. Pictures of all the famous patrons lined their walls, from athletes to politicians. We waited in line and ordered, then found an empty table in the back.

Dez watched me as I bit into the pizza and moaned. The taste—it was nothing like the pizza back home; the cheese, spices and crust.

His dark auburn brows lifted. “Don’t ever stop eating if you’re going to make sounds like that.”

I almost choked on my slice, flushing. “It tastes good!”

He laughed. “I can tell.”

Grinning, I watched him under my lashes. For someone so large, he had such delicate eating habits. He cut each slice into bite-size pieces while I shoved half the thing in my mouth and probably ended up with sauce all over my chin. Of course, I finished before him since I inhaled the pizza. As he savored each bite, I took the time to people watch.

Around humans I tended to feel as if I lacked worldly knowledge, especially in a place like this where there were so many people, all of them so very different looking. I hadn’t even had a human friend; the closest I came was the lady who worked at the ice-cream parlor. I wanted one, probably much like humans wanted a puppy, but my father was wary of growing too close to them.

After we’d left to investigate Times Square and Broadway, I was reminded of why my father was so cautious. On the storefront of a cute Italian eatery was a sign that boldly read WARDENS ARE NOT WELCOME. Underneath that was scrawled WE SERVE ONLY GOD’S CHILDREN.

I sucked in a shrill breath, unsettled. These were the kind of people that thought we were the Devil incarnate; the kind who believed we were monsters, no matter how much good we did. As sheltered as the other females and I were, we’d only heard of such bigotry but never actually seen it in real life.

“Hey,” Dez said, reaching down between us and clasping my hand in his. “You okay?”

I hadn’t realized I’d stopped until then. “I just don’t understand.”

His gaze followed mine. “Honestly? In a city like this, I’m kind of surprised, but it’s just one place out of thousands. And there’s no point in even trying to figure it out. They’re the ones who don’t understand. They don’t know what’s really out there.” He tugged on my hand. “Come on, there’s a lot to see.”

I let him pull me away. “It’s just—”

I stopped again as a cold, sharp series of tingles exploded between my shoulder blades. I turned before Dez said anything, sensing a nearby demon. My gaze sought it out among the crowds of humans hurrying up and down the packed sidewalk.

The demon had walked out of the eatery—the very one that supposedly only served “God’s children.” A laugh bubbled up my throat but got stuck. He didn’t look much older than me, and to human eyes, he no doubt appeared rather harmless as he stopped beside a red-and-white fire hydrant. His dark hair was cropped close and his profile revealed angular features. A stud in his right nostril glinted in the sunlight.

“A Fiend,” Dez said, his hand tightening around mine.

Although Fiends were the most common class of demons topside, I’d never seen one. Curiosity rose swiftly as I watched the demon. “He’s so... bold.”

“Of course. He knows we can’t do anything among humans. If I made a move, it would look as if I attacked one of their own.”

And that wouldn’t be good.

The demon looked as though he was about to catch a cab, except he glanced over his shoulder and his dark eyes met mine. An odd light glinted off them. I sucked in a breath, muscles tensing in preparation for an all-out attack.

Dez raised his free hand, flipping the demon off.

An impish sort of grin crossed the demon’s face in response and he reached down, brushing his fingers along the top of the fire hydrant. With a wink, he turned his back on us and pushed off the sidewalk, darting between taxis and work vans.

“Oh, no,” Dez murmured, stepping back as he shoved me behind him.

My heart jumped. “What?”

Before Dez could respond, the top of the hydrant blew with a bang. Water erupted, streaming high in the air. Another loud pop cracked farther down the street, and then another and another. Water jetted into the air as far as I could see.

I squealed as cold liquid rained down on us, the sound lost in the surprised shouts of pedestrians. Within seconds, I was drenched, as was almost everyone nearby. Traffic ground to a halt as water poured into the streets. Metal crunched. A taxi smacked into the back of another, resulting in a chain reaction of epic proportion.

A cabbie jumped out, fist in the air. “What the hell? You hit my car!”

“You stopped!” the other cabbie screamed. “You stupid mother—”

His words were cut off by blaring horns. Absolute pandemonium broke out, and the whole time, the Fiend was across the street, loitering on the curb, unaffected by the downpour. He was laughing.

Soaking wet, Dez pulled on my arm. “Let’s go!”

We ran, dodging people as we were pelted by water. Several blocks down, we finally reached a somewhat dry area. Stopping, I looked over my shoulder. Times Square was flooded.

“Dear God,” I murmured. No one appeared to be injured. If anything, what the demon had done was merely create a huge inconvenience, and for some really messed-up reason, I was smiling as I turned back to Dez.

He placed his warm hands on my cheeks, smoothing the wet hair out of my face. “Are you okay?” he asked, his expression taut.

I laughed, and he cocked his head to the side. “I’m fine. I can’t help it,” I said, grasping his wrists. “That was funny.”

“Only you would find that mess funny.”

“Whatever.” I rose, using his arms to brace myself. Adrenaline was kicking through my veins. Maybe that was why I did what I did next. Or maybe it was because I’d been wanting him to kiss me again since the last time our lips touched. Closing my eyes, I pressed my lips against his. On contact, he sucked in a deep breath. His lips were wet and firm and absolutely wonderful. I settled back on my feet, sliding my hands to where his tangled in my hair.

We stood there as a crowd gathered behind us, taking in the spectacle of the river that had taken over Times Square. People passed us by, and either we were invisible to them or they were oblivious to us in that moment. And there was no past between us in that second or future, there was just now—right now.

Dez’s eyes glowed with want. “I think I really like that demon.”

I laughed, thinking that must be a first. We reached for each other at the same time, so I don’t know who was holding whose hand, but the smile remained plastered on my face right up until it was late and we called it a night.

All the excitement exhausted me, but a different kind of weariness sprung alive when we stepped into the hotel room and my gaze fell to the bed. My heart rate tripped. We were going to be sleeping in that bed. Together. Just him and me. Us. Why I needed to run through the different ways of saying we were sleeping together was beyond me, but it still didn’t seem real.

Sleeping together in a room that was not in a houseful of others of our kind made everything seem so different, much more adult and intimate. As though we’d been playing at being grown-ups but not anymore.

I gathered up my sleep clothes and changed quickly. Part of me wanted to linger in the bathroom, but if I did, there was a good chance I’d crawl into the big tub and go to sleep.

When I returned to the main room, Dez was already in bed. A flash of heat shot through me as I stopped at the foot of the bed, twisting my fingers together.

Dez’s gaze slid my way. He’d changed while I’d been in the bathroom, wearing a white cotton shirt and hopefully bottoms to sleep in. His thick lashes shielded his eyes.

“What are you doing?” he asked, a smile in his voice.

I shrugged one shoulder.

He grinned. “Are you going to stand there and watch me sleep?”

My nose wrinkled. What did he think I was? A creeper? “No.”

“Then come on.” He patted the bed next to him. “I don’t bite. Unless you want me to.”

The kind of heat that flushed my face could fry eggs. Dez laughed deeply. “I’m kidding, Jas. Come on. I’m tired and I won’t be able to sleep without you getting in the bed.”

I cocked my head to the side. “Really?”

“Yeah,” he replied, yawning. “I’d be too worried about you being uncomfortable. And possibly staring at me while I sleep.”

“I’m not going to watch you sleep!”

“Whatever.”

I crept forward, until I was halfway up the big bed. He yawned again, casting his attention to the TV. Dragging in a deep breath, I grabbed the edge of the covers and slid in, settling on my back.

My chest was rising and falling so fast I swore I could see the blanket move.

“Good night, Jas.”

That was it? He was seriously going to sleep and wasn’t going to, I don’t know, test out this bed? I should’ve felt relieved, but... but I was disappointed in a way. “Good night.”

Seconds stretched into minutes and then Dez rolled onto his side, facing me. I held my breath. Another handful of seconds ticked by and then my body moved without my brain really catching up to it.

I rolled onto my side, and our gazes locked. There was a foot between us, but the space felt nonexistent as we stared at each other. In that moment I didn’t think I’d ever be able to sleep, but the beauty of his blue eyes and the slight smile on his lips was the last thing I saw before I slipped away.

Even dedicating a full day to touring New York City the following day, there was no way I could visit every museum, see every street I’d only read about or visit all the landmarks. We’d spent an ungodly amount of time in a toy store that seemed to have everything.

That night, together, we flew over the city to Ellis Island and then back to the Upper West Side, landing among the majestic statues of our kind and gazing down at the shimmering lights of the cars and street lamps below us.

I thought about that morning and felt warmth bubbling in my chest. When I woke up, I’d been half sprawled on him, my leg thrown over his and my head nestled in the crook of his shoulder. Unless he had dragged me over him in the middle of the night, which could be plausible, it had been me that had sought him out. He hadn’t seemed to mind, though. His arm had been secure around my waist.

Waking up like that had been... well, it had been more than nice.

“We can’t stay here long,” Dez said, stretching out his wings until they brushed over mine. I shivered at the intimate contact. “The clan is hunting and, while your father approved of this trip, I doubt he’d be happy to know you’re out here at night.”

I nodded as I leaned forward, my hands digging into the ledge. My senses were going off left and right. There were a lot of demons moving around down there, more than I imagined there would be.

“How many do you think are here?” I asked, glancing at Dez. “Demons, I mean?”

He tipped his head back, eyeing the stars. “Hundreds. Mostly Fiends like the one we saw yesterday. Some will be Posers and maybe an Infernal Ruler or two.” He stood, twisting his head from side to side, working out a kink in his neck. “They’ll come across an Upper Level demon at some point tonight. Whether they capture it is the question.”

Once a demon was captured, it was promptly sent back to hell or interrogated. I wasn’t supposed to know about these things as females were kept out of politics, but there’d been many times over the past, while suffering a never-ending case of boredom, that I had eavesdropped on my father’s conversations. I knew that there were locations in the city where demons were questioned, using tactics that had frozen the blood in my veins.

Tension radiated from Dez. It was palpable in the air. “You want to be out there, don’t you? Hunting?”

“It’s hard not to.” He glanced down at me, his eyes a deep blue and lips a dark gray. “It’s ingrained in us.”

So they said. I turned my attention back to the ground below. Carrying out my desire to hunt a demon here would be too risky. We could run into a clansman and that would bring this little trip to an end. Still, the idea of that many demons out when there wasn’t even a quarter as many Wardens to handle them was disturbing.

A cool wind tossed my hair and teased the thin membranes in my wings, causing them to flutter restlessly. “Why are there so many?”

“No one knows what went down in hell or why so many demons were cast out.” Dez turned and reached down, offering me his hand. “But the numbers are growing. They’re up to something—something big.”

I placed my hand in his, letting him pull me up. “But we’re going to stop them.”

He smiled as he hopped down on the rooftop and then placed his hand on my hip. I didn’t need the help, but he insisted and I let him. “Do you want to head back to the hotel or go down to the streets?”

It was late and I knew as the hours went by, a battle of sorts would take place in the streets and even in the skies. As badly as I wanted to be out here, I wasn’t stupid. A female Warden would end up being a demon magnet and getting Dez in major trouble. My desire to experience both a hunt and more of the city would have to wait.

“Let’s go back.”

Heading to the other side of the building, I darted in front of him, tossing him a grin over my shoulder. “Beat you back to the hotel?”

His laugh was deep and rumbled through the night. “It’s on.”

Vaulting the ledge, I hit air and spread my wings, using the burst of wind to carry me up. I didn’t have to look behind me to know that he was right there. I flew up between the two skyscrapers, my laugh lost in the rush of air as I soared over the building. We shot up, circling a long and thin antenna. Dez gained on me, but I dipped, gliding down, past so many floors I lost track in the fall.

It was like old times, when we were kids and would race over the mountains, back to the mansion. I glanced over my shoulder, spying Dez through the strands of my hair. The chase was different now in a way. My muscles quivered in anticipation, and not of winning the race.

We were neck and neck as I nosedived over the top of our hotel. As I’d done above the mountains, I let gravity do its thing. I tucked back my wings and the world spiraled as I picked up speed. Lights. Darkness. Lights. Darkness.

“Jasmine!” Dez’s shout became a mere whisper.

At the last second, a heartbeat before it would be too late, I unfurled my wings and flipped, touching down in the alley on my feet. Chunks of asphalt flew in the air at my impact, startling a man walking a dog at the end of the alley, sending them both scurrying down the street and into the night.

Dez landed half a second later and was in my face even quicker. “What in the Hell were you thinking?”

“I won!” I twirled, arching my wings. “That’s what I’m thinking.”

He caught my arm, stilling me. His eyes blazed with fury. “You could’ve killed yourself pulling a stunt like that.”

“Aw.” I patted his chest. “Were you worried?”

His brows slammed down. “What do you think?”

I laughed, unwilling to let go of the giddiness of victory. “I’m still faster than you.”

“It has nothing to do with how fast you were. You suicide-bombed it right there.”

Shaking my head, I inhaled and phased into my human skin. As always, my jeans and shirt were stretched out after the change. “Chill, buddy, I know what I’m doing. I’ve been doing it every night for three years practically.”

His mouth dropped open.

“Okay. That didn’t sound right. But I was in control.” I sighed. “I like the way it feels when I’m falling.”

He stared at me a moment longer and then phased. “That’s absolutely insane.”

“Maybe.” I shrugged. “I still beat you.”

Dez barely said a word to me as we headed up to our room. Like the night before, I commandeered the bathroom first, freshening up and changing into something to sleep in while he did who knows what in the main room. The same nervousness I’d experienced last night returned with a vengeance. Then, we’d both been exhausted, but tonight I was too amped up to go comatose so quickly.

I passed him on the way out. Grabbing the remote control, I dived onto the bed and tugged the covers up. I concentrated on finding something on TV while I heard the water come on and then shut off. My stomach dipped when the bathroom door opened and he strode out.

I believed he’d forgotten his shirt.

Nylon gym shorts rode low on his hips, low enough that I wondered what magic he was using to get those dark blue shorts to stay up. He tossed his clothes onto the floor while I eyed his chest. When he glanced at me, he caught me staring and holding the remote control like a complete idiot.

“Sorry.” He went to the other side of the bed and tugged the covers back. “It’s warm in here.”

“Turn up the air.” I watched him climb in and let the sheets linger at his hips.

He lay back, biceps bulging as he folded his arms behind his neck. The darkness of the soft sheets created a strong contrast against his golden skin. “Already did.” Pausing, he looked at me. “Does this make you uncomfortable?”

No. Yes. It made me want to drool. I shook my head.

“Fine.” His brows rose slowly. “What are you watching?”

I glanced at the screen and my eyes widened. I must’ve stopped on one of the premium movie channels. It was a sex scene. Boobs—big boobs—were everywhere. And a whole lot of breathy moaning.

I’m pretty sure my face had caught fire.

Quickly changing the channel, I finally gave up and tossed him the remote. Like an old man, he settled on a local news station. He dropped the remote on his chest. I eased down on my side, pretending to watch the news while I was really studying his profile. A muscle ticked along his jaw.

I squirmed. “You’re still mad at me.”

His gaze slid sideways. “I’m not mad.”

“Yes, you are.”

He didn’t say anything for a moment and then picked up the remote, muted the TV and dropped it on the small table beside the bed. He rolled onto his side, facing me. “When you fell, it scared me.”

“It shouldn’t have. Like I said, I knew what I was doing.”

“But I didn’t know that.” He reached over, plucking up a strand of my hair and twining it around his finger. “I had no idea what you were doing.”

I didn’t say anything as I watched him unravel the twist he’d created.

“It was a pretty cool tactic,” he admitted, and I grinned. “Just warn me next time.”

“Not if we’re racing. Then I won’t have the upper hand.”

He smiled slightly. “Wait. Do you think you had the upper hand?”

“Of course I did.”

“I’m going to disagree,” he teased, lashes lowered. “You did not.”

“Whatever.”

He inched closer, raising up on one arm. “You don’t believe me?”

“No.” I laughed, rolling my eyes. “You overestimate—”

Moving lightning fast, Dez shifted and I was suddenly underneath him. His arms were on either side of my head, caging me in. Our bodies didn’t touch, but I felt him to the tips of my toes anyway.

The teasing grin disappeared when I dragged in a deep breath and my chest brushed his. Everything changed in an instant. The playful mood faded, replaced by primal heaviness. Our gazes collided and locked. Neither of us moved. His closeness sent a series of shivers skittering across my skin and made it hard to take slow, even breaths. My body tensed when his gaze dropped to my mouth.

He tilted his head to the side. “I... I honestly have no idea what we were talking about.”

“Good. Neither do I.”

He shifted his weight onto one arm, bringing him closer. “Have you enjoyed your trip so far?”

“Yes.” I felt as if I couldn’t get enough air into my lungs.

“Good.” He lowered his head. His breath was minty as it moved across my cheek and then my lips. “I’m glad.”

I wasn’t really following the conversation and I wasn’t sure that he was fully aware of what was coming out of his mouth. I searched my hazy brain for something to say and wet my lips. I—

The sound that came out of Dez’s chest rumbled through me. A stuttered heartbeat passed and then his lips were on mine. There was nothing slow about this kiss. It scorched my skin and caused my body to stretch tight like a bowstring. The kiss deepened, spinning my senses. I shuddered when his hand curved over my shoulder and drifted down to my waist, his long fingers spreading out under the hem of my shirt, grazing the bare skin of my stomach.

I gasped, floored by the raw sensations pounding through my blood. My skin felt as if I was about to phase. Maybe I was.

“Jasmine,” he whispered, the word falling against my lips, and then his body was pressing mine into the mattress, heavy, sweet and hard.

Nothing could’ve prepared me for the weight of him or for how my body responded without thought. My hands went to his shoulders, skimming down the taut skin of his back. His muscles flexed under my palms as his mouth trailed a fiery path to my chin and then down my throat.

He paused, lifting his head. Dez’s pupils stretched thin and the heat in his smoldering gaze should’ve had me running from the bed, but all it did was make me want more. And I hadn’t wanted more with anyone else. I hadn’t even wanted a kiss beyond the curiosity of experiencing one, but with him, I wanted everything and that was frightening. Enticing. Thrilling. I moved again, and he shuddered, closing his eyes.

Those eyes opened again and met mine as he sat back. Disappointment rose swiftly, but then both his hands were on my waist, his fingers tangling with the edges of my shirt. Breathless, I lifted my upper body and he gently pulled the shirt over my head.

I lay back, eyes wide and dizzy. Cool air washed over my bare skin and tiny bumps spread across my flesh as his gaze, intense and heated, swept over me.

“You’re beautiful.” He moved his fingers with such exquisite delicacy, causing my back to arch and my skin to tingle. “So beautiful.”

I was beyond words. He lowered his head, kissing me deeply. When he pulled away, he nipped at my lip, wringing a sound from me that would most definitely embarrass me come light of day.

Dez trailed a fiery path of little kisses down my neck, across the curve of my shoulder, and then down, exploring in a way that spun my senses. Sensations raced through me and it was like freefalling through the sky.

Flames ignited inside me when his chest came down on mine. The feel of skin against skin was a startling experience. His lips were against mine again, and I wrapped myself around him, wanting and needing to be closer.

I wasn’t in control of myself and there was something wonderfully freeing in that moment of letting go. My hands flattened along his lean sides as I hooked my leg around his. He murmured something under his breath as he lifted his head, expression strained. My body curled around his and the pressure of that movement was shattering.

And then he rolled off me and onto his back, throwing one arm above his head, the other over his chest. He stared at the ceiling as his breathing slowed.

My heart was still pounding erratically, heightened by the confusion swirling inside me like thick smoke. I sat up and my hair fell into my face. I made no move to push it back. I was afraid if I did move, I would pounce on him. “Why did you stop?”

“Why?” Dez laughed, but it sounded strangled. He closed his eyes again, cursing low as he rubbed his palm down his jaw. “I’m not stupid, Jas.”

That was so not the response I was expecting.

As I stared at him, some of the heat burning me up from the inside faded. “I don’t follow.”

He dropped his hand and pried one eye open. A smile crossed his lips, but it was wrong—all wrong. “This can only go so far, Jas. And being here, in this bed with you, makes it hard not to take it all the way. And there’s one problem with that. I know you don’t plan to tell me yes at the end of this.”