After Earth

1000 AE Nova Prime

Kitai’s father stared at him. Just stared.

Kitai took the opportunity to practice his attitudes. At first he indulged himself with a huge smile, but then he decided that it made him look too smug, and so he changed it for something extremely modest. After that, he tried an expression in between. All during the smile time, he practiced different oral sentiments ranging from “I knew I had it the entire time” to “I think they were being generous” and countless other statements as well. The whole time, Kitai’s father maintained his hard, unmoving expression.

“Raige! Move it!”

He nodded to no one in particular and turned in the direction of Bo, who was shouting over to him from the elevators. His father remained right where he was, which was hardly unusual: He wasn’t really there. Instead it was his image, a frieze carved into the wall of him along with six other people. They were collectively the seven Ghosts in the history of the Rangers. His father, Cypher Raige, had been the first, and over time six others had developed the ghosting technique as well. Kitai wondered if he likewise would develop the ability. One thing at a time. First you become a Ranger. Let everything else work out after that.

He left his father carved in stone and joined the other cadets in the elevator. Moments later they were heading down into the bowels of Ranger headquarters. There was little discussion or banter among the cadets. All of them were understandably wrapped up in their individual thoughts, which were, as it happened, all exactly the same: Did I make it?

Kitai glanced around at those standing near him. Every one of them looked nervous. Kitai tried to hide his confidence from them. All it would do was irritate them.

Minutes later the elevator delivered them to their destination: a series of offices in the tallest section of the HQ. The higher up you were, the more vital the offices. The view of the city from these levels was said to be spectacular and one of the perks of command.

There were no stools or benches of any kind in the hallway outside Commander Velan’s office. It was Velan’s job to oversee the development of cadets into Rangers, and his was the final word on whether one qualified to make that jump. Kitai was utterly confident in Velan’s decision-making abilities. Velan had a keen eye for talent, and Kitai was certain that he would have had no trouble seeing Kitai’s capabilities despite the attempts by others to try to deter or impede them.

Three other cadets were called in before Kitai. He stood in place, leaning slightly against the wall for support. No one spoke save whenever a cadet emerged from Velan’s office. In this instance, each of the three who emerged one by one did so with a C-10 model of a cutlass in his hand. That meant, of course, that they had passed, and each was greeted with quiet congratulations from the others. Hands were shaken, backs were patted. Kitai did the same thing as the others, welcoming them into the fold of Nova Prime’s planetary protectors. It was odd, of course, because the people who were welcoming them were hoping that they would have the same bounty handed to them.

“Raige!” came Velan’s sharp voice from within his office. Kitai promptly snapped to attention, taking in a deep breath and letting it out slowly. There was no doubt in his mind that he was going to be coming out with his own C-10, but that didn’t mean he couldn’t be humble about it.

He entered as the door closed behind him. Kitai stood at full attention, chin snapped forward, eyes leveled on Velan, who was seated behind his desk. Velan was glancing at some holographic material Kitai took to be written reports on his performance from the previous day.

“Your test scores were very impressive,” Velan said. “You’ve got a Ranger’s mind. No doubt about that.”

It was a huge strain for Kitai not to smile broadly. He had expected nothing less, and it was good that the Rangers who had been doing the scoring had seen that in him. It was indeed the only thing that had concerned him: that they’d be so annoyed by his determination and skills that they might try to sink him just out of hostility. He realized he should have known better. That was simply not how Rangers operated, and he would be sure to remember that—

“But I’m not advancing you this year.”

Kitai felt as if the world had suddenly slipped out from underneath him, leaving him in an endless headlong free fall. The words hit him again one at a time like stones, the two heaviest and most painful of which were not and advancing.

How was it possible? He almost asked Velan to repeat himself—almost. But somehow he stopped short of that.

He was so stunned that he did not even see the compassion in Velan’s face. There was no room in Kitai’s world for compassion. All he cared about was accomplishing his goals, and here Velan was calmly smashing them to pieces.

Everything else that he wanted to do in his life, up to and most important making his father happy, hinged on his becoming a Ranger. And here Velan was sitting there calm as you please after telling him what a fine Ranger he would make and informing him that he wasn’t putting him through? It was insane. It made no sense at all!

“You take unnecessary risks,” Velan continued. Whether he was aware of the pounding shock and rage going through Kitai’s head was unknown to Kitai. In fact, it wouldn’t have mattered even if he had known. Velan had a point of view, and he was going to make it clear. “You are emotionally unpredictable. You have improper threat assessment, and you confuse courage with recklessness, which at the end of the day is just a far more dangerous way of being scared. You may, of course, try again next year.”

Try again next year?! Spend another year’s worth of his time taking the same courses, the same preliminary tests, so he could wind up failing again? This makes no sense! It’s ridiculous! How can—?

Kitai’s inner turmoil was, of course, of no relevance to Velan. Having delivered the news that had just destroyed Kitai’s day and possibly his entire life, the commander simply said, “Dismissed.” With a casual sweep of his hand, he pushed the holographic file with Kitai’s information out of his view and swung the next one out so that he could inspect it. He wasn’t even bothering to look at Kitai anymore. He had pushed Kitai’s information and achievements and life casually aside and moved on to the next cadet.

Velan looked up and blinked in mild surprise when he saw that Kitai was still standing right where he’d been, not having moved a muscle. There was no anger in Velan’s face. He simply appeared mildly confused that Kitai was still standing there.

Fighting the urge to hyperventilate and only partly succeeding, Kitai nearly shouted as he said, “Sir! Permission to address the commander, sir!”

“Denied.” There was nothing condemning or judgmental in his response. He was simply a man with a lot to do, and he saw no reason to waste time in a pointless discussion with a wannabe Ranger.

It was as if Kitai didn’t even hear him. As if Velan hadn’t denied him the chance to speak because who in his right mind would do so? He proceeded to continue talking in the exact same volume as he had before.

“Sir, I am dedicated, have studied and consistently displayed conduct becoming of a Ranger, sir! I request that the commander reconsider his assessment, sir!”

Velan stared at him with utter incredulity. Disobeying a direct order, which Kitai had just done by speaking to him, was grounds for pretty much anything Velan wanted to do in response, up to and including banishing him from the Ranger program forever. In one shot, Kitai was risking throwing away the entire future that he thought he was fighting for.

Then Velan’s face softened just a bit. “I understand what it’s like to see someone die. I know what that does to you.”

Kitai stiffened. It was the equivalent of Velan smacking him across the face with a two-by-four. It stopped him cold, and Velan was able to continue uninterrupted.

“I’ve been your father’s friend for a long time, Raige. Your friend as well, although you may not know it. I know what the loss of your sister was like for him and you and your mother. And I know that you expressed no interest in being a Ranger until after her death. You’re trying to… no. Forget it.” He paused. “I’m not going to tell you what you think because you already know that. What I am telling you is this: You’re rushing your way into a situation that you are not, in my opinion, emotionally ready for. If I endorsed your moving ahead, it would be catastrophic, and your parents would have to face the rest of their lives with no children at all. I will not do that to them, and I certainly won’t do it to you. Do you understand?”

Kitai did everything he could to hold back the tears. He steadied himself, fighting to bring himself under control. When he spoke again, he had to fight to get out every single sentence. His words were of no relevance to the decision made as to whether he should be a Ranger. He knew that for certain. Yet they were the only words he had left and, in addition, the only ones that really mattered to him.

“Sir”—his voice was barely above a whisper—“my father is returning home tonight. Today’s a special day for our family. I haven’t seen him… and I have to be able to tell him that I have advanced to Phase 2. I’ve got to be able to tell him that I am a Ranger, sir.”

Velan’s face didn’t move a centimeter. He simply stared at him for what seemed the longest few moments of Kitai’s life. During those few seconds, it seemed to Kitai that anything was possible.

He was wrong, as it turned out.

“You tell your father that I said ‘Welcome home.’”

Kitai couldn’t believe it. How could Velan be doing this to him? He’d admitted that Kitai had everything it took to be a top Ranger. So he had some impulse-control problems. So what? If he moved on to Phase 2, certainly that was something that could be attended to at that point. Why deprive him of his move forward? What could he possibly—?

Velan’s eyebrows knit, and there was now a darkness in his eyes. He was clearly displeased over Kitai’s refusal to accept his decision, and his next words underscored it. “Your lessons in discipline begin right now. You may leave this room with dignity and decorum befitting a cadet. Or you may leave under escort. Your choice.”

For half a beat, Kitai actually considered the latter. Being dragged out shouting over the way he was being treated…

But that was as far as he got in his thoughts. If that was really how he exited the room, being hauled out by Ranger troopers, he was effectively finished. All anyone would spend the rest of the day talking about was “Did you hear? Kitai Raige was dragged out kicking and screaming because he didn’t have what it took. What a sap. What a fool.” He would be done. That was simply not a public image that he could reasonably walk back.

“Sir, yes, sir,” was all he said. Then he turned on his heel and walked out.

He emerged into the outer lobby to the questioning looks of the others. Then they noticed that he wasn’t carrying a C-10, and that answered the first of their questions. Before they could ask any others, or offer consolation, or perhaps even revel in his failure, Kitai was across the hall and in one of the elevators. The door slid shut, and it was only once he was alone and on his way upward that the barely withheld tears broke free of his mental barrier and rolled down his cheeks unfettered.