A Gathering Of Stones

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Warm, replete and clean for the first time in days, she crawled between fresh, sweet-smelling sheets and sighed with pleasure. “Well, Aili my Liki, this is something else. Why oh why am I putting myself through this muck? Ah I know, oh I know; poor Tre, he didn’t deserve having his life taken away from him like that, just so Old Maks would have a hold on me. It’s my fault he’s there, my fault I’m here. I owe him. Sometimes though…” She yawned, turned on her side and pulled the quilts up to her nose. Ailiki was a hotspot curled up against her stomach; the mahsar was already asleep and snoring with that tiny eeping that was a comforting nightsong. The rain was slashing down outside, a steady thrum against the shutters. A cold draft wandered past her nose. She murmured with pleasure, dreaming she was home again, a girl in her narrow bed, safe in the arms of her kin and kind, then she dropped deeper into sleep and left even dreams behind.

In the morning she half-fell out of bed and barely made the slop basin before the nausea erupted and she emptied her stomach.

When the spasms stopped, she dipped a corner of the towel in the pitcher and washed her face, then sat on her heels, eyes closed, while she waited for the upheaval in her body to die down. Ailiki came trotting over to her, pressed against her leg. She lifted the mahsar, held her against her breasts, her warmth helping to soothe away the ache. “Well, Lib, I’m going to have to look, aren’t I.”

Sitting in the middle of the bed, rain dribbling down outside, a dull dreary drizzle, she turned inward and explored her body.

There was no mistake, no way of avoiding the truth. She was pregnant. The wind had worn away more than her nerves those days in Ambijan. She sat there in the quiet warm room, thinking: What do I want? What am I going to do? In the end, it was all words. She wanted the baby and she was going to have it. She needed it. Karoumang’s child. No. Mine. The thought warmed her. My daughter. She knew it was going to be a daughter. She wasn’t going to be alone any more. It didn’t matter what her brother did. Didn’t matter if Maksim wouldn’t have her as apprentice. She folded her arms across her body, hugging herself and what she bore. I’m not going to worry, she thought. There’s plenty of time to finish this thing before there’s enough child to worry about. Tell Ire if he bothers to show up again? No! No way. It’s none of his business.